Chapter Text
Summer break. No racing. For Lewis that meant training, but for the Mercedes team, especially for Kimi, since he finally finished school, it meant relaxing. Obviously, they weren't completely going to let themselves go, but someone, most likely Toto, thought it would be a good idea to go on vacation with his drivers. And obviously his wife, because if Mercedes wasn't a team but a family She and Toto would definitely be the parents. Anyways, Toto sent invites to George and Kimi first, obviously, because they were the current drivers. Valtteri too, because he also deserves appreciation. And Mick because let's not forget about him either, right? Right. Anyways. Mercedes family, vacation invites, blah blah blah. Now Lewis, he is still a part of Mercedes, even if not physically, he still was in Toto's mind and heart, which means Toto sent him the invite anyway. And that's what mattered to him. What Lewis didn't know was that Nico was also invited. Yes, Nico Rosberg. Because summer break meant no interviewing drivers, no causing chaos on the grid. Whose idea was that? They didn't know. (It was my idea) And to Susie's surprise both Lewis and Nico agreed, but that was only because neither of them knew that the other was also coming with the Mercedes crew. Toto wasn't surprised, he was technically the one who suggested it all.
If you were wondering where they were going. Somewhere with a beach. An island. A Greek island.
(Don't question the faulty logic of how they all meet in the same place)
When almost everyone met in front of the plane, Lewis was all talk, happy to be back in a place where he's surrounded by familiar faces. And for the first time in a while, since his Ferrari season was... Well... Meh, Lewis seemed really happy. But that happiness was only short-lived. Since Toto told him why they couldn't start yet. "Well, Nico is running late so we gotta wait until he arrives" the Austrian spoke. "Nico? I mean, I have nothing against the guy, but don't you think that inviting Nico Hulkenberg is a bit ran-" Lewis began but was interrupted "Rosberg. I mean Nico Rosberg" Toto said. Lewis' face fell, the smile on his face immediately disappeared. "You didn't seriously invite him, did you?" He questioned, his tone serious. "It wouldn't hurt if you got on good terms with him again, you know" Toto answered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Is it too late to go home again?" The brit asked. "Yes, Lewis, it won't be that bad." He sighed, then nodded, silently agreeing, though he seemed visibly unhappy at the thought of having a reunion with his friend, (ex)teammate, childhood buddy, rival, his everything, but a lover.
On the plane, yes, a private plane, Lewis sat as far away from Nico as possible, facing away from him. He hoped that if he didn't look at him, he'd just disappear. Because then he wouldn't have to deal with him. And regardless of how childish it was, he shut his eyes, just in case Nico decided to do something stupid, such as approach him. Nico didn't approach Lewis, he stayed in his seat during the flight, so the Brit's doing just resulted in him falling asleep. After what felt like 10 minutes in total, but was way longer in reality, Lewis was shaken awake by George. "Ey, mate! Wake up, we landed" Lewis just blinked at him, eyes adjusting to the lights of the plane. "Alright" he said eventually, gathering his stuff and following George out of the plane.
Off to the hotel they went
At the check in, things just got worse, well, worse in Lewis' opinion. Because of the hotel rooms. Actually, it was less of the rooms that were bothering him but more of the who he had to share it with. Because it turns out he had to, not only have Nico in his room, but also be alone with him. And he asked Toto, who said there's nothing to be done, if he could change rooms. I mean, of course something could have been done but that wouldn't be as fun as making Nico and Lewis share a room. Eventually, Lewis accepted his defeat and snatched the key card for Nico's hand, not even looking him in the eye and still refusing to exchange a single word with the German.
It was pretty hot outside and not too late in the day, when they arrived at the hotel so most of the fam decided to go to the beach. Including our dear Brocedes boys. At the beach, they put their towels on some sun beds in the shade, because the sun in Greece may have the best conditions for tanning, but can also screw your skin over, especially with sun-sensitive skin, and give you a really bad sunburn. "Sunscreen!" Lewis shouted after the majority of them, who were already on their way to the water. "No need! I already told the others, told them to put some on." Toto replied after stopping and turning around. That made the Brit also get ready to go for a swim. Until Nico, who stayed back spoke up "I could use some" then he extended his hand "please" he added, because after years of barely communicating, only speaking the most necessary of words, he didn't want to be too rude. Lewis handed him the bottle without a word. He wasn't being immature, quite the opposite actually, at least in his mind, he wasn't speaking, to avoid the consequences of all the stupid things he'd say if he were to engage in a conversation with the blonde.
Dinner was the same, no words exchanged between the ex-teammates. They sat at separate tables. And at this point we've established that even if they had a table big enough to fit all of them, the two wouldn't necessarily sit next to each other. Until George, who was sitting opposite Lewis, said "Lewis, mate, you know you can't keep avoiding him and acting like he's not there. Especially not if you want to enjoy this vacation. Which you should, like everyone else" Mick and Valtteri nod in agreement. Both because they didn't have much more to add, and because George's statement basically covered everything, and also because Mick was chewing his food. And you don't speak with your mouth full. That's rude. "I'm not ignoring him, I'm avoiding conflict" the older British guy responded. George sighed at that, of course he had some excuse. The evening after dinner didn't get any better nor more talkative between Nico and Lewis.
They were both in bed. A double bed. But they agreed to each stay on their own side. Without words, because what else would they do? And as far as I'm concerned, with guys at least, everyone stays on their side and it's all fine. Except that's not what happened. What really happened was, when Lewis was asleep, he rolled over, landing him on Nico's side. But not in the cute, romantic way. It was more of a chaotic, slap-you-across-the-face-with-my-arm kind of way. But Nico took this mess over not talking any day. Because he was awake, probably wondering if he was doing something wrong or if Lewis really just didn't want to talk to him and human contact did seem quite pleasant at the moment, even though being slapped by an unconscious person isn't exactly the most comfortable thing, it's better than total distance. Nico was sure though, that he didn't need to be comforted that much. After all, he could have pulled Lewis close and snuggled him, which admittingly would have left a few questions for the next day, but he still could have done it. Yet, he convinced himself that he didn't care, that he could fall asleep normally, because there was really nothing that Nico did wrong and there was nothing missing from Nico's life. He was totally fine.
Which may or may not have been a mistake, because the next morning, when the German woke up, he felt tired. Way too tired, because he laid awake last night. Though at least Lewis' hand still laid across his chest. Which could be, if you looked at it from a different angle, a bit of an obstacle, in case Nico needed or wanted to get up. But regarding the fact that they hadn't been able to exist peacefully in each other's presence for years, Nico just stayed still. Tried to fall asleep again. What if he woke Lewis up? What if he'd get mad because of it? Nico didn't want to cause a fight. Breathing slowly. Until he was hit in the face by Lewis' hand. The first time being slapped by him might have been an accident, but the second time it happened, Nico got suspicious, yet he decided to ignore it, well, he tried to, but the fact that quiet snickering could be heard from beside him, told him that it wasn't the unconscious Lewis slapping him, but a very much awake one, who now tried to suppress his laughter. "Very funny." Said the German sarcastically, he didn't find being slapped funny, for obvious reasons. "You thought I was still sleeping, didn't you?" Lewis asked, pulling his hand away. "Not that it matters, but so what if? I was just avoiding conflict, like you would say, who knows what you might have done if I had disturbed your beauty sleep" the other tried to defend himself. "Anyways" Lewis said, grabbing his phone off the nightstand. "Toto texted, said they'll still need some time to get ready and that we shouldn't wait for them" he continued. Nico looked at the other man, slightly annoyed with the fact that he had to spend more time alone with Lewis, because it would most likely be awkward again. Yet there was a tiny bit of something, in the back of his mind, a thought buried so deep that Nico had almost forgotten it existed, because he wanted to forget that feeling of longing. This feeling of wanting but the inability to actually have it. That's why he buried the thought of spending quality time with Lewis so deep in his mind. So, he acted annoyed because he most likely couldn't live with the thought of actually admitting his feelings.
Right, but no time to dwell on old feelings. Not now anyway. It was time to get breakfast, a bit early to get up on holiday but neither of them could sleep, due to the feeling of slight uncertainty in the air, you know the feeling when you sleep somewhere new, somewhere different, and you wake up, just feeling out of place as a result of the circumstances you're in? Well, if you do, that's what both of them were feeling. Not well rested but not terrible either. Just... Weird. In a way that neither of them could explain. Silence hangs in the air, like humidity fills the air after the rain. Cold, quiet, uncomfortable. Because what do you say to someone you haven't spoken to, outside of your job?
"We should go eat breakfast" Nico suggested, breaking the silence, just barely. Lewis just nodded. Not because he was mad at him. Not because he enjoyed the silence, he just didn't have anything to say. And the teasing attitude he had when he slapped Nico was gone. Meaning the silence stretched on and both changed their clothes, their backs facing each other.
Breakfast, early breakfast. Good thing is, there are barely any people, so there's no one to bother them and there is no wait for the food. Bad thing is there are barely any people so it's quiet. The silence they wouldn't have minded a few years ago had now come to the point where it got unbearable to endure each other like this. Even if talking meant conflict. Sitting across from someone, who was a lot in your life, yet could have been so much more, can easily tear you down. But they tried to ignore it. Which made things worse. Nico wondered why Lewis was so teasing and almost willing to engage in conversation when they were still in bed but now went back to not speaking at all. Something must have shifted but since the German wasn't a mind reader, he couldn't figure out what. Meaning what Lewis felt, and thought was completely unknown to him. Yet Lewis' thoughts were plaguing him. Why was it that when he saw Nico, he didn't feel too mad about it? I mean sure he's a different guy off track than on, but he didn't understand how his brain just ignored everything that had happened between them. Yes, he is a grown man but sometimes even grown men struggle with their feelings and that's totally fine. No shame here <3. In the Brit's mind it wasn't fine, sure, other guys struggling, was in Lewis' opinion important to talk about, but him struggling, with feelings regarding the guy he had years of rival history with, that is what bothered him. He couldn't picture himself in a situation where those "feelings" no matter good or bad or whatever, would lead to a nice outcome, so he pushed it down, just like Nico. So there they were, both silently struggling, just too stubborn to admit it to one another, thus only making themselves suffer in silence.