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    Summary

    “Ilya, what the fuck are you doing?” Shane rested his weight against the door frame and took in how ridiculous his husband looked, black underwear covering his crotch and a lime green frog headband on his head. “What is all this?”

    On the bathroom counter sat multiple tubes and glass jars. The tubes had pump dispensers whilst the jars had small pipettes. All different colours, all different sizes. 

    Ilya glanced at Shane through the mirror, his skin all soapy and wet, like he’d rubbed a cleanser into his skin and let it emulsify with water but missed rinsing off some of the product by his nose. 

    Shane’s eyes glanced across the counter. Two cleansers, two toners, one serum plus an ampoule, two different moisturisers and a lip balm. 

    “Is skincare routine, Shane,” Ilya, with cleansing oil on his hands, turned to look at Shane. “Do not act so surprised when you have million step routine.”

     

    or, ilya rozanov goes to sephora for a skincare routine and develops a new love for salmon sperm, even though he has shane's sperm at home.

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