Work Text:
Sam dug his fingers into Frodo trying to hold him up.
“I won’t drop you Mr. Frodo!” Sam said through the tears. “Not after doing everything to destroy the ring!”
Frodo looked at Sam with pain in his eyes. “I……. Can’t keep holding on……… Sam.” He said quietly, destroying the ring and seeing Sméagol die made him out of it.
“No Mr. Frodo.” Sam said holding on even harder despite Frodo slipping because of the blood and sweat covering his hand. “I won’t let you go. Just keep holding on. Think about how lovely the shire will be when we get back. The flowers will be in bloom by the time we return.”
“I’m not making it to the shire, Sam.” Frodo said. “But I want you to. I want you to see those flowers. Marry Rosie Cotton. I want you to live the life you always wanted.”
Frodo loosened his grip on Sam knowing he was already unable to be pulled back up.
“Mr. Frodo, don’t let go!” Cried Sam trying his hardest to hold Frodo. “I love you. I can’t lose you. When I see the shire I don’t see flowers, or even Rosie. I instead see your soft smile and blue eyes that remind me of blue hydrangeas. I want to marry you Frodo! I want to return to the shire with you!”
Frodo looked into the lava then back at Sam. “I love you too.” He said before falling into the lava below.
Sam grabbed at the air trying to catch Frodo. He desperately tried to stop reach him but fell an inch too short. Sam would’ve stayed there and cried however the platform was breaking so he sprinted out the cave and onto a safe space. There he laid crying.
He laid there for hours. He couldn’t believe Frodo was gone. If only he had held on a little longer. Sam wished to be picked alive by vultures in that moment but was later saved by Gandalf’s eagles.
Sam tried to assimilate back into society. It was no use. He always found himself thinking of Frodo. His friend group felt incomplete. They sat in the green dragon multiple times without speaking because Frodo always knew what to say and they didn’t.
Bilbo was broken with the death of Frodo and couldn’t believe it. He lived in Rivendell and never returned to the shire except on a few occasions often without speaking to Sam.
Sam always would think of Frodo in public. He’d always think of him while buying groceries when he found a gift he wished to give him.
He inherited Bag End along with Frodo’s other possessions but he could never make himself move anything. He kept all rooms as Frodo had had them before leaving and only ever cleaned the bedroom where he slept with a few necessity rooms.
Sam was forever broken with Frodo’s death. He couldn’t hardly live with himself. A few years after he moved back into the shire Bilbo was getting moved to the Grey Havens for his was very old.
“Do you wish to go to the Grey Havens with Bilbo?” Gandalf said in a caring manner.
“If I wish anything I wish to die soon. I want to see Frodo again.” Sam said sadly.
Gandalf was taken aback but not surprised. At the beginning of the journey Sam wouldn’t have felt this way if Frodo died. Yes he’d be very sad but he wouldn’t want to die. Gandalf wished he could do something to help Sam. He could always kill him but he couldn’t bring himself to want to.
“I understand.” Gandalf said. “Very well then. I can’t help you see Frodo again, however I don’t want you to die soon. You should accompany Bilbo to the Grey Havens, he might not talk to you frequently but he still needs someone to take care of him. That’s why I’m sending him there.”
Sam sighed. “I’ll go, the shire is painful to live in. Everything reminds me of Frodo.”
When the day to leave came Sam didn’t pack much. He packed only his clothes and a small painting of Frodo which he only recently brought himself to look at.
Sam rode in the carriage with the old Bilbo. It was quiet between them for a while. Sam didn’t exactly know why but he assumed that Bilbo had blamed him for Frodo’s death despite him not really knowing why Frodo had died.
“Why Sam?” Bilbo said slowly. “Why is Frodo dead?”
Sam’s heart dropped when he heard that. He didn’t like talking about it.
“Because I couldn’t protect him, Mr. Bilbo.” Sam said sadly.
“What exactly were you up to on that journey?”
“I can’t say much.” Sam said looking out the window.
Bilbo hummed and went back to being quiet. “Say, do you ever know what happened to that old ring of mine?”
“I………..” Sam said looking down. “I destroyed it.”
“You let my nephew die and then destroy my ring?” Bilbo said angrily. “My, I thought you were a kind man Samwise.”
“It’s not like that.” Sam said. “It was a horrible ring that hurt Frodo. He destroyed it. It wasn’t me. If I hadn’t of dropped him in the volcano he would’ve lived. I was too weak to pull him up.” Sam started crying.
“Oh……..” Bilbo said softly. “I didn’t know that part. Thank you for telling me Sam.”
Sam hummed in response.
They eventually reached the dock where the boats were. Everyone was there to wish Bilbo and Gandalf goodbye, no one knew that Sam was going too.
“I’m going to miss old Gandalf.” Merry said to Sam holding back some tears. “He taught me a lot of important things.”
Sam didn’t respond and just nodded. He was mentally preparing himself for having to tell his friends goodbye.
“Sam?” Merry said noticing something being off about Sam. “Is something the matter?”
“Please tell us, Sam.” Pippin. “We’ve been worried for you.”
“I’m not coming back with you.” Sam said quietly.
“What do you mean?” Pippin said confused tilting his head slightly.
“I’m going to the Grey Havens.” Sam said crying. “I can’t keep living in the shire. I’m giving the Shire to you and your families.”
“You can’t be serious.” Merry said, his eyes tearing up. “Please tell us you’re not actually leaving.”
“I’m not lying.” Sam said. “Frodo’s death is too hard on me.”
“It wasn’t your fault.” Pippin said.
“I know.” Sam said. “I just can’t live without thinking of him. That’s why I have to go.”
Pippin and Merry both started crying. They couldn’t believe they’d lose another one of their friends. Sam wasn’t dying but they’d never see him again.
“Come, Sam.” Gandalf said. “It’s about time to leave.”
Sam hugged both Merry and Pippin.
“I love you both so much.” He said crying. “I’m glad you came with me on that journey, even if it was just the beginning.”
Merry and Pippin both cried into Sam’s shoulders. They were sad but understood why he had to do this.
“I hope you find peace.” Pippin said.
“I hope you do too.” Sam said finally letting go.
He walked away towards Gandalf. Gandalf looked down Sam and touched a hand on his back.
“Are you ready?” Gandalf said.
“I’m not.”Sam said. “Let’s go.”
The two stepped on the boat. It slowly sailed away as Merry and Pippin stood there crying at another loss of a friend. Sam waved as the ship left. He wasn’t just waving at his friends but he was also waving at the land he used to love. He was saying goodbye to life he should’ve had with Frodo.
The End