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If he genuinely thought about it, Sokka could pinpoint exactly where his current predicament started.
It began during one of the rare times that Team Avatar got to meet up in the aftermath of the 100 Year War, just after a huge diplomatic meeting that saw almost every civilization come together. The worldwide gathering had become an annual event, its location rotating each time so as to not favor anyone specifically. The exact purpose of the occasion was lost on Sokka—he never felt like much came out of it, at least not more than any normal council meeting amongst any nation—but he suspected that it occurred more to prove a point than anything.
Just over eight years after the war had ended, it still felt like the peace they had was fragile, eager to shatter if even one world leader made the wrong step. This meeting was a reassurance of sorts, a reassurance that, no, the Fire Nation was not stepping back from their commitment to peace and that neither the Northern Water Tribe nor the Earth Kingdom was going to take advantage of the turmoil for their own interests. It was about showing each other the commitment they shared to keeping the world stable, no matter how delicate it seemed.
All that to say, the meeting itself was long, arduous, and boring; Sokka was glad to be out of it by the time dusk fell on the city of Ba Sing Se.
Most of the team—Aang, Katara, Toph, Zuko, and Sokka—were lounging in the courtyard of the Jasmine Dragon. Iroh was glad to close early in the evening to give them a private place to relax. He had his own friends from across the world to catch up with, anyway, so he gave them the keys to the place and kindly asked for the shop to still be in one piece when they left.
Suki couldn't make it to their impromptu get-together that night, a fact that filled Sokka with both sadness and relief. He was glad that she was chasing her own happiness, but their breakup three years ago still stung all this time later. When she told them that she had to stay for another meeting with the Earth King—some Kyoshi Warrior business, he thought—he couldn't help but feel the tension in his shoulders release a bit. He loved her as a friend, of course, but it was still hard to look at her and know that "chasing her happiness" didn't include him.
In the courtyard of the Jasmine Dragon, Aang and Zuko had started a small bonfire that the group gathered around now, passing around glasses of sake and wine, updating each other on their lives.
"Our last stop before this was in Omashu," Aang was saying as he animatedly recounted his and Katara's most recent adventures. "Everything was pretty much rebuilt after the Fire Nation takeover, and Bumi showed us around the place! It's looking really good; you guys should get over there when you get the chance."
"Yeah, I can't wait to see everything that's changed," Toph replied sardonically.
"Exactly—oh."
Everyone let out a chuckle at that—the slightly tipsy atmosphere made everything seem funnier than it was.
"How about you, Zuko? How's it going in Caldera?" Katara asked, sensing that Aang had recounted quite enough of their journey.
"Oh, you know," he said. "Meetings with stuck-up noblemen, paperwork filling every surface—the usual."
"Does Councilor Chan still have a stick up his ass?" Sokka asked, a small smirk lining his face.
Zuko sighed, the discontent obvious in his tone. "As always. He's still opposing pretty much any progressive motion I try to pass, making progress as slow as fucking possible." He took a sip from his sake glass. "I can't tell if he actually believes in all that backwards shit or if he's just doing it to spite me."
"Why not both?" Sokka said.
"Yeah, yeah," Katara interrupted, "politics are politics; that's not new. I asked how you're doing, Zuko. How are you feeling? How's Mai?"
"Oh, she broke up with me."
"What?!" Aang shouted.
"Oh my god, I'm so sorry, I didn't—"
Zuko waved Katara's apology away. "No, no, it's fine, you didn't know. Besides, the more I think about it, the more I think it was for the best."
"How so?" Sokka asked curiously. He was just as shocked as everyone else. Zuko and Mai had been together for so long; he just assumed that they were in it for good. Apparently not.
"I mean," Zuko said before pausing. He looked down at the glass in his hand. "I loved her—I still do, really—but I don't know that I was ever in love with her, if that makes sense." He stopped again. Sensing he had more to say, everyone let his words hang in the air for a bit. "When we were kids, I was with her because that's what we were supposed to do, and as we grew up, it just felt like the easiest thing to do. But I think we both knew that we were just comfortable, not in love."
"I'm still sorry, Zuko," Aang replied, breaking the brief silence that followed. He looked over at the Fire Lord sympathetically. "Even if it was for the best, breakups still suck. I'm sure some other girl will be lucky to have you."
Zuko snorted. "Yeah, some other girl," he said absentmindedly. He froze. Sokka got the feeling that he didn't mean to say that out loud.
"Or some guy," Toph supplied easily. "I'm sure there are many eligible bachelors that want a piece of Fire Lord ass."
Now that sentiment halted any thoughts in Sokka's head. His chest tightened at the suggestion. Zuko? With a guy? Surely Toph was fucking with him, he thought. She does love fucking with people.
But the tension that held Zuko in place faded away at her words. He cleared his throat as he swirled the glass around in his hand, his other hand lightly tracing his scar. "Or some guy," he agreed. "I think that's what Mai was trying to get me to see when we broke up. That I liked guys. And maybe not girls. At all." He almost seemed nonchalant when he said that. Almost.
"That's great, Zuko!" Aang exclaimed, jumping out of his seat. "I'm so proud of you for discovering yourself like that! And for having the courage to share it with us!" He lunged just barely over the fire to tackle him into a hug.
"We're all proud of you," Katara added with a sweet smile. "Right, guys?"
"Yeah, yeah," Toph said. "As if I didn't already know. But yeah, I'm glad you finally got on the same page."
Sokka didn't say anything for a bit, his mind still reeling. Zuko was still wrestling out of Aang's grip, laughing along as Sokka just kind of stared at him. He's only broken out of the trance when Toph not so subtly kicked him hard in the shin.
"Ow! What was that—"
"We're proud of him, right?" she asked through gritted teeth.
"Oh," Sokka glanced over at Zuko, who was looking at him warily. "Of course! I'm really happy for you, bud."
Any remaining tension slid off of Zuko's form as he grinned at everyone. "Thanks, guys. That means a lot to me."
"So, are there any hot guys worth scoping out here?"
"Toph—"
Sokka let the noise of the group bickering fade into the background as he got lost in his own thoughts again. It wasn't a big deal, really; he knew lots of queer people. Suki had a girlfriend now, he thought with a bit of pain, and that didn't bother him other than the sting of the breakup itself. He knew that Toph had girlfriends and boyfriends, and Aang had told him that the Air Nomads of the past never thought to put a label on anything, letting monks love whom they wanted to without judgment.
So why did the idea of Zuko liking a guy make his stomach churn uneasily? Why did his chest clench at the thought of him being with a man?
Maybe it's all the wine, he thought, looking down at his almost empty glass. Yeah, it was probably the alcohol.
Sokka really tried not to dwell on it, he swore, but it didn't help that he now spent a lot more time in the Fire Nation than he used to.
Shortly after everyone split up again, the ambassador of the Southern Water Tribe to the Fire Nation announced her retirement, leaving the position open.
Hakoda, trusting his son and his friendship with the Fire Lord, asked him to fill the role.
"It'll be good for you to gain more political experience," he had explained, "and I trust that you'll give our tribe the voice it needs in the Fire Nation."
It made sense, and Sokka didn't have any good rebuttals, so a few weeks later, he found himself already entangled in the politics of the Fire Nation's capital.
It was after a meeting with the Fire Council and other ambassadors that his dilemma resurfaced.
"His 25th birthday is coming up soon, you know," he overheard an Earth Kingdom ambassador—her name was Wo, maybe?—say to another ambassador once Zuko left the room. "They'll be searching for marriage candidates soon, I imagine."
That made him hesitate. He started packing away his papers slower.
"Oh? Do you think they'll try to get him to settle down with a noblewoman?"
"Pfft," she laughed. Seriously though, Sokka could not think of her name. What was it? "More like a nobleman, especially after he so publicly repealed Sozin's oppressive marriage laws."
"The rumors are true, then?" the other asked, eyebrows raised in slight surprise. "I assumed some detractor spread those to undermine his authority."
Rumors?! Did everyone in the palace think—or know, he guessed—that Zuko was gay? Did everyone in the country know? The thought weighed heavily on his mind.
"Maybe so," she shrugged, "but I've heard some councilors talk about possible male candidates in the capital, so there's probably some truth to it."
Sokka suddenly no longer cared that he didn't remember the ambassador's name, not when the possibility that Zuko might marry a man was on the table.
The ambassadors' conversation drifted to other topics as they left the room, leaving Sokka to stew in his own head. Why did that bother him so much, the idea of Zuko being with a guy? His heart felt like it stopped every time the topic came up, and it didn't make sense to him. He shouldn't have a problem with it.
Oh god, he thought with a start. Am I secretly homophobic?!
The fear of being a homophobe haunted Sokka during every waking moment.
Okay, maybe every waking moment was a bit of a stretch, but it was pretty damn close, especially since he interacted with Zuko all of the time.
He originally assumed that the Fire Lord would be far too busy to hang out with him on a personal level, that most of their interactions would be business-related, but he soon found that not to be the case.
If there was anything he could say for certain about the role of a Fire Lord, it was that it was a lonely one, so Zuko took every opportunity he could to relax with his friends. Or, friend, because it was really just Sokka, as far as he could tell.
Most mornings were spent sparring in a training area in the back corner of the palace; most meals were had together, and any time there was an opening longer than half an hour in his schedule, Zuko took the opportunity to show Sokka around the city.
And Sokka really appreciated all of that, don't get him wrong, he loved spending time with his friend (maybe soon-to-be best friend), but it only made him more uncertain of how he felt about Zuko's attraction to men.
One evening in late summer, a long meeting was unexpectedly called off due to a diplomat's arrival being delayed another day.
"Come to the city with me?" Zuko had asked with a gleam in his eyes. Sokka couldn't find it in himself to deny him.
He shortly found himself wandering the streets of Caldera with a disguised Zuko—was a cloak barely hiding his face considered a disguise?—just in time for the night market to start opening up. The smell of various meats and spices filled the air, and the sound of people milling about the stalls created an atmosphere that Sokka could only describe as calming, despite the chaos of it all.
The two men grabbed spicy kebabs of pig-chicken—too spicy, Sokka thought—and only slightly complained out loud before they started perusing the various wares lining the streets.
Sokka was studying a table of bejeweled daggers when his problem really started.
"Can't say I've seen you around before," the dagger seller said. "Have you been to my stall before?"
Sokka would usually answer a well-meaning question right away, but the coy tone made him pause. Was this guy flirting with him?
He looked up from the table to get a read on this guy but found that he wasn't talking to Sokka at all—he was talking to Zuko.
"I don't know," Zuko replied with an equally teasing tone. "I feel like I would remember running into you if I had."
The other man—who Sokka could now see was objectively attractive, if his toned arms and chiseled jawline said anything—chuckled, smirking slightly at Zuko.
"Well, let me introduce myself then," he said, taking Zuko's hand. "The name's Zamik." Sokka's eyes nearly exploded out of his head as Zamik leaned down to kiss his hand.
"I'm Lee," Zuko answered breathlessly. His cheeks quickly started to blush, and his eyes darted down to the point of contact.
Sokka felt like his heart was going to beat out of his chest with the scene before him. Zuko's sudden shyness and Zamik's brazen flirting made him want to scream into his pillow later that night.
At the moment, though, he couldn't take any more. "You know, I don't think I need a dagger, actually," he said as he snatched Zuko's hand from Zamik's.
"What—" Zuko tried to say.
"I think it's getting late, so we really need to get going, Lee." Sokka at least tried to keep any venom out of his voice, but he couldn't help it if a little slipped into how he said the alias.
Zamik said nothing as he watched Sokka stalk off with a shocked expression, letting the pair leave without another word.
Sokka couldn't help but feel ashamed of himself as he dragged Zuko by the wrist back towards the palace, the contact burning his skin. He knew he should have dealt with his negative feelings towards Zuko's gayness on his own time—privately—but he hadn't, and now it was manifesting in how he interacted with Zuko.
"What was that?" Zuko asked as they stepped into the courtyard of the palace. He wrenched his hand from Sokka's grip and lightly rubbed his wrist.
"Sorry," Sokka started, though he didn't quite know how to finish. Sorry, I was really disgusted by how you guys were flirting, and it turns out I'm actually homophobic didn't feel like the right thing to say, even if it was true. "I don't know what came over me. I guess I..."
"You guess you what?" Zuko urged, looking both confused and hurt.
Sokka hesitated and really looked at him. In the courtyard, the only light that illuminated him was the moon above their heads. Zuko had pulled down his hood when he entered the palace, so the moonlight shone onto his long hair, softening his features. He was still flushed, though that was more likely from the brisk walk it took to get here than it was from Zamik. His golden eyes—and wow, they were so, so gold—searched Sokka's own questioningly.
"I don't know," Sokka finished lamely. "I think I'm just tired. And you know me when I'm tired," he tried to joke.
Zuko gave him a look that told him he didn't quite buy it, but he nodded anyway. "Okay. Sorry, maybe we shouldn't have gone out."
"No, it's not your fault," Sokka said as he dismissed his apology. "I should have known my own limits. I'll catch you tomorrow morning for some sparring, though, right?"
Zuko finally relaxed as he smiled softly. "Yeah, see you in the morning."
When Sokka made it back to his room, he flopped on his bed and stared at the ceiling, replaying the scene in his head over and over again. Zamik's lips touching Zuko's hand, the blush on Zuko's face, the cloying tone both of them had—it was all too much.
He slapped his face and groaned. He really needed to figure himself out before he hurt Zuko any further.
Sokka's true epiphany happened later that month.
It was during one of their usual early morning sparring sessions when it happened. The Kyoshi Warriors, including Suki, had temporarily returned back to the palace to act as Zuko's guard while his usual staff were on vacation—some Fire Nation holiday or something, Sokka was sure. Maybe he should have known what it was, but it didn't really matter to him at the time.
The training area where the guards usually spent all their free time was emptied out for them, except for the few Kyoshi Warriors standing at each entrance. The morning sun was just peaking its head over the horizon, bringing the heat of the day with it.
Both men had tossed their shirts off a few matches ago, the sweat becoming too much to handle. Now, in the middle of their seventh match, each man held their ground with determination.
Sokka's sword clashed with Zuko's twin daos as Sokka tried to sweep his foot under Zuko, but Zuko leapt back easily, taking another fighting stance.
"Is that really all you got? Dirty tricks?" Zuko taunted with a predatory expression.
"Oh, you want dirty?" Sokka retorted. "I can play dirty."
With that, Sokka threw his sword down and aimed for Zuko's feet. Zuko dropped his own dao in surprise as he was tackled to the ground, both men suddenly trying to grapple with the other for the upper hand. One minute Sokka was on top of Zuko, and the next, Zuko overtook him.
The wrestling continued for a few minutes before it finally ended in Sokka pinning Zuko's wrists to the ground above his head, both of them heaving for air in the aftermath.
"Ha! I got your ass, jerkbender!" he celebrated. "What's it like to be taken down by a master, huh?"
Zuko rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah, like that was fair. If you had stuck to an honorable duel, you would have lost."
"You and your honor, man," Sokka smirked.
It was at that moment that he realized he hadn't let go of Zuko's wrists. And he was about to, he swore, until he really took a look at the Fire Lord.
Zuko's hair was messy, different strands sticking out of his usual topknot in opposite directions. His face was flushed red from exertion, and sweat beaded down his forehead. Sokka watched as one drop made its way down his scar, onto his nose and then his lips, causing Zuko to involuntarily lick them. But his eyes—has Sokka mentioned those before?—seemed like they were piercing into his soul despite the apparent exhaustion.
Sokka couldn't find it in himself to look away. If he didn't know better, he'd say that he thought Zuko looked beautiful.
"Sokka?" Zuko asked, his brow scrunched in confusion. "Are you okay? Can you let me go?"
And his voice, Sokka mused, might have been the most wonderful sound he'd heard all day, all his life, even, with its raspiness and comforting low tones.
He only noticed that he was leaning down towards Zuko when he was a few inches away from his face.
"Sokka?" Zuko asked, softer this time. Was it Sokka's imagination, or did that sound hopeful?
That was the thought that finally snapped him out of it. He abruptly released Zuko's wrists and scrambled backward off of him.
"Um," he tried to say. "I, uh—I don't—"
With such eloquent words, Sokka got to his feet as quickly as he could and sped out of there, barely hearing Zuko call after him as his blood rushed in his ears.
What the fuck? What the fuck?
That was the only sentence running through Sokka's head again and again as he raced through the halls of the palace. What the actual fuck was that?
He ran into his room and locked the door behind him before sliding down to the floor, his head cradled in his hands.
What was he doing? What was he about to do? Was he actually about to kiss him?
Oh god, was he about to kiss Zuko? Zuko, the Fire Lord? Zuko, his male best friend? Emphasis on male?
Why would he do that? He didn't even like guys like that, did he? He thought he was homophobic! He wasn't happy that he was, but he had kind of accepted that those were what those feelings of disgust were. If that's not what it was, then what was it?
His spiraling thoughts were shut out by the sudden knock at his door.
"Sokka?" he heard a higher-pitched voice say. "It's Suki. Are you good?"
He sighed shakily. "Yeah, I'm good! Perfectly fine!"
"Uh-huh," she said, unamused. "Can I come in?"
He slowly stood up, contemplating his life choices. He cringed at the idea that she witnessed all of that, but now that he thought about it, she definitely did. There was no way he could avoid whatever just happened forever, and if he knew Suki, she wouldn't let him run away from it.
He tried to breathe deeply before opening his door.
"Hey," she said casually.
"Hey," he said as non-casually as possible.
He gestured for her to step in, closing the door behind her as she sat on the edge of his bed.
"So," she started. "What happened back there?"
Sokka was getting real sick of how much he was sighing today. "I don't know, Suki. I'm so confused." He sat down next to her and hid his face in his palms. "I thought I knew what I was feeling, but whatever that was..."
She hummed thoughtfully as she put her arm around his shoulders, grounding him to reality. "What did you think you were feeling?"
Suddenly, Sokka felt embarrassed, heat rising to his cheeks. It didn't seem like a good idea to divulge his possible secret homophobia to a trained warrior with a girlfriend, but he trusted her. It also didn't seem like that's what was happening, anyway.
"I thought I was being kind of homophobic," he admitted. "Which is stupid, because I know so many queer people in my life, and I'm fine with pretty much all of them! But for whatever reason, the thought of Zuko being with a man really freaked me out. Any time he talked about another guy, or any time another guy looked at him, I felt..." He didn't know what he felt now as he rambled. Disgusted? Repulsed?
"Jealous?"
He choked on nothing. "What?"
"You felt jealous? When Zuko flirted with other guys." She said it more than asked it, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
Sokka stared blankly at her, a thousand emotions running through him at once. "Jealous? Me? Of, of Zuko?"
"...Yeah?" she tried again, looking at him cautiously. "You weren't exactly subtle, Sokka. Every time Zuko so much as even mentioned another man, you became so frustrated. I thought it was obvious that you wished he were talking about you instead."
And just like that, his mind broke into a million little pieces.
As he came back to himself, it felt like everything clicked together. Every time they touched, he felt like his senses were on fire, and every vaguely flirty man felt like a threat. Once he looked at Zuko, he couldn't stop looking. If he were somehow bigoted, wouldn't he want to avoid Zuko, not spend every second he could with him?
"Oh my god," he finally said. "I'm not homophobic. I'm in love with him!"
"Holy shit, you didn't know," Suki said incredulously.
"No, I didn't know!" he defended. "I didn't even know I liked guys!"
"Didn't know you—?" she spluttered, taking her arm off his back to rub her temples. "What are you talking about? You were always checking out guys during our relationship!"
"I was?"
"Yes!"
"Huh," he said. If he thought about it, he would probably agree with her, but a more important issue came to mind. "Oh my god, I totally fucked everything up between us. He must hate me now."
"What? How is that your takeaway here?" Suki sighed and stood up. She positioned herself in front of him and roughly took his face in her hands. "You might be the most oblivious man I've ever known."
"Thank you?"
"It wasn't a compliment," she continued. "You should tell him how you feel. He's not mad, just confused. If you want any chance of salvaging your relationship, you need to talk to him."
Sokka sighed again and looked down at his feet. "Yeah, you're right. It's only fair that I explain myself."
Suki smiled softly and patted his cheeks before letting go. "Good." She walked towards the door before pausing and looking back. "And Sokka?"
"Yeah?"
"If you break his heart, I'm going to have to break your neck."
"Oh. I mean, what if he doesn't—"
He didn't get to finish his sentence before the door slammed behind her.
He lay back on his bed, looking up at a very familiar ceiling. Well. There's nothing left to do then.
There was actually a lot left to do.
Both Sokka and Zuko had a day full of meetings, each of them running straight through lunchtime and into the evening. Any time they were in the same meeting, Sokka could feel Zuko's eyes on him, begging him to make eye contact, but he couldn't look back. Not yet, not now that he knows how he truly feels.
And how he truly feels made a lot more sense now, didn't it? He always felt weirdly drawn to the Fire Lord, especially as he grew and stepped into his own role confidently. At this point in his life, Zuko was probably the person he was closest to. He loved his family, of course, and Aang, Toph, and Suki—but none of them made him feel the way Zuko did. They no longer knew him the way Zuko did, and that was a terribly intimate thought.
By the time either of them was done with work, it was well past dinnertime. He knew that Zuko, that goddamn workaholic, was definitely still awake, probably going over proposed legislative changes in his bedroom.
While Sokka would have loved nothing more than to delay his confession, he knew he couldn't, not if he wanted to stay friends with him after all of this.
The Kyoshi Warriors guarding Zuko's door nodded at him as he approached. God, he really hoped Suki didn't tell any of them about his predicament, but judging by the looks on their faces, it seemed he had no such luck.
He breathed deeply as he stood at the door, trying to psyche himself up. Come on, Sokka, he thought, it's just a confession and possible rejection. You've been through tons of those!
But none of them were this important, some traitorous part of his mind whispered back. He waved the thought away and then swiftly knocked on the door before he could pig-chicken out.
"Come in," he heard Zuko call. It's now or never.
Sokka carefully opened the door and slipped in, making sure to close it securely behind him.
"Oh, Sokka," Zuko said. "I was wondering if I was going to see you at all today."
Sokka could not have prepared himself for what he saw when he finally looked at him, especially not after avoiding the sight all day.
Zuko was sitting at the desk in front of his couch, ink brush in hand, looking over the many papers littering his desk. His hair was taken out of the traditional topknot and had cascaded down his back. His eyes were still looking down at whatever he was reading, his brow scrunched in concentration. His scar framed his face in such a gorgeous way that Sokka had never considered before, but it felt right now that he really looked at him. He was biting his bottom lip lightly, putting the cherry on top of the look of attentiveness. At some point, he had changed into more casual robes that were loosely hanging on his shoulders, with just a sliver of skin peeking out below them.
He looked perfect.
It was completely unavoidable now. Now that Sokka knew what the tightness in his chest meant, it was impossible not to notice every little thing about Zuko and be entirely consumed by him. How did he never put the pieces together before Suki had to lay them out for him? How did he not know he was in love with him?
When he didn't say anything, Zuko looked up from his desk and raised his brow. "You okay, Sokka? You've been kind of out of it today."
Sokka shook his head and straightened himself out. Get it together, man.
"Yeah, I'm great! And, um, that's kind of what I came to talk to you about. This morning, I mean." God, was it always this hard for him to string a sentence together?
"Oh," Zuko said, an embarrassed look crossing his features, "no, you don't have to; I get it. It was a weird morning for both of us."
"No, I really need to talk to you about it, actually," Sokka protested. "It's sort of connected to other things I've been thinking about, and…" he took another breath, "…and I think I need to talk about it. With you."
Zuko looked more concerned than embarrassed, now. "Sure, okay, whatever you need, man." He quickly finished whatever he was writing before standing up and moving to the couch behind him. He motioned for Sokka to sit next to him.
Sokka obliged and rested his arms on his knees. He couldn't believe he was about to do this.
"So, I've been feeling, um, some weird things about you, lately," he started.
"Weird?" He couldn't tell if Zuko's expression was still concerned or if it had turned into hurt.
"Not bad, weird!" he said, raising his hands in front of him. "It was just, I don't know, not what I expected."
"Right," Zuko replied, and there was no mistaking the confusion in his tone this time.
Sokka tried his best not to groan in frustration. "I just mean that I've never felt like this before, so when I felt it towards you, I was confused, and that came out in some ways that I regret." He really should have just gone straight to the confession, but now his brain was scrambled, and he was trying to make something, anything, come out of it. "Hell, for a minute, I thought that I was homophobic—"
"What?" Shit, it is not the time for that, Sokka.
"But I'm not!" he said, sounding way too defensive now. His rambling became more out of control quicker than he could think. "I didn't know what it meant when I felt repulsed by the thought of you with another man, or what it meant when I couldn't stop looking at you. I didn't know why I felt the need to get between you and any guy who looked at you, but now I do!"
Silence hung between them for a minute as Zuko processed what he said, Sokka's labored breathing filling the space. Sokka could have sworn that Zuko was staring at him longingly, but he didn't dare hope too much for that.
Zuko licked his lips, and god, did that set Sokka's nerves on fire, and subtly scooted closer before asking, "And how do you feel?"
"I—" Sokka choked on his next words. Was it too soon to say these exact words? Probably. Did he care? Not particularly. "I'm in love with you."
It wasn't very long after he said it that Zuko was suddenly on top of him, desperately pressing his lips to Sokka's.
Before he could fully understand what it meant, Sokka knew he had to savor every moment of this. He let his eyes flutter shut as he kissed Zuko back, his hands sliding down to his waist to keep him in place. Zuko's hands were clutching his face as if his life depended on it, and then one hand trailed back to take out Sokka's hair tie and grasp his hair, biting down on his lip at the same time.
The motion caused Sokka to gasp, giving Zuko a chance to lick into his mouth hungrily. God, he had never felt like this during a kiss. How could a kiss make him feel so on fire?
The amount of tongue and teeth involved would have been too much with anyone else, but with Zuko, everything felt like not enough. He couldn't get enough of him; he wanted to get impossibly closer to him, closer to anyone he'd ever been.
Eventually, the need for air became too much to overcome and both of them were gasping as they pulled away from each other. Sokka leaned his forehead against Zuko's, letting a hand leave his waist to tangle itself into Zuko's hair. Both of their eyes were dilated to hell, and their panting might as well have been heard across the entire palace.
I think I owe Suki a fruit basket or something, Sokka thought.
"So, does that mean you like me too?" he asked, a smirk overtaking his features.
He meant it to be teasing, but it seemed Zuko couldn't help but be sincere in his answer. "I've been in love with you for so long, you don't even know."
"I think I've been in love with you for a long time, too," he answered, "though I didn't know it until very recently."
Zuko quirked his eyebrow at that. "Yeah, what was that about, thinking you were homophobic, again?"
Sokka groaned and brought the hand still on Zuko's waist up to cover his face. "It was so stupid. I was so jealous and I didn't even realize—"
"Aw, babe," and that term shouldn't have made Sokka's heart jump as much as it did, "you were jealous?" Zuko's eyes widened in realization, a grin growing on his face. "Is that what was up with that guy at the market? You were jealous that he was flirting with me?"
Sokka blushed harder than he thought possible. "I didn't know that at the time, please don't!"
Zuko laughed and moved Sokka's hand away from his face before kissing him again, this time slower and more confident. Sokka lavished in the feeling, kissing him back with less urgency and letting something softer take its place.
They stayed like that, lazily kissing and whispering sweet nothings, for what felt both like forever and not enough time. Eventually, they found themselves lying in the bed, Zuko's head pillowed by Sokka's chest as they held each other.
"I don't think I can ever be without you like this again," Sokka admitted, his words barely making enough sound to be heard.
Zuko seemed to understand him all the same as he looked up and smiled at him. "I don't think you need to worry about that," he said. "If you think you need me, know that I need you even more than that."
Sokka snorted before letting his eyes close. "I doubt that."
The last thing he heard before falling asleep was Zuko's disagreeing hum in response.
And if Suki got back to her room the next day to find a fruit basket lying on her desk, well. She knew she did a job well-done.