Chapter Text
Life in the Regime is the best life a person could ask for, Katie thinks.
Or, she claims she thinks. She absently nods her head every time she's reminded of the fact, wielding a facade of mock obedience.
The same concept had been drilled into her head for well over half of her life— wherever she'd came from, whatever life she led before, must've been miserable compared to this.
She doesn't dwell on that time too often, no. It's not like she can remember it anyways.
"My old life? It was ephemeral. I can't remember it entirely, but flashbacks come and go— like broken shards of light" she'd tell whoever was bored enough to listen to her dramatic monologue.
In all actuality, she hadn't a clue what life was like before the Regime, and Ash was determined to keep it that way.
Any mention of her parents— "There were no records kept."
Or a question about her birthplace— "Somewhere foreign. We're not sure where, though."
Even the slightest mention of her heritage— "All that matters is that you are of the Regime now."
She'd grown frustrated with his enigmatic answers, so she'd given up on asking a long time ago.
For now, she'd just continue living her life as a princess.
Roaming the desolate halls of the palace, seeing how many dusty library books she could stack on her head, stealing Haipers' socks to make puppets: all very exciting and very sociable activities.
Yet, no matter how many new (yet equally boring) hobbies Katie occupied to cure her lonely mind, one question lingered: The one question she got an answer to was the one that confused her the most.
"What's so bad about the outside world?" Katie asked in yet another heated argument with Ash.
He sighed, exasperated with her prodding, "it's dangerous out there, Katie. I don't want to risk anything."
She'd seen him leave the Regime plenty of times.
Those big gates she wasn't allowed near would creak open, she'd get a glimpse of her kingdom, and Ash— maybe alongside Tubbo or Haiper— would leave the comfort of the palace like there was no danger capable of touching them.
Her dire need for an answer only grew upon the one occasion she did get to go past the gates of the Regime. The one time she caught a glimpse of just what beauty the outside world held.
"Oh, and you can't forget the portrait. Whoever painted it probably lost their hand in the process. They've got, like, fifty of em' in that castle! Can you imagine that? Fit says he hates how many people live there— 'they call themselves a family, isn't that ridiculous?' But I don't think it's that bad, honestly. It gets a bit lonely here when—" Katie yammered.
She was sure Tubbo wasn't paying attention, as he was giving all his focus to the engine he was working on.
Bringing Katie with him on a delegation trip to the North was the biggest mistake Ash had ever made. Ever since those three days of negotiations, pointless meetings, and copious amounts of supervision, Katie had never been quite the same.
This new Katie craved one thing— to explore what was beyond these walls. To see for herself what other beauties the world held instead of scouring through books and listening to old stories.
"I'd do anything to go back outside, Tubbo."
"Uhuh, yep yep yep. I hear you loud and clear," he responded, definitely not hearing her in the slightest.
The North was far more different than what she's seen in the Regime. One of the first things she noticed upon stepping into the castle, curiously, was the open windows.
Even as she listened to the diplomatic discussions, she could still hear the hustle and bustle of the kingdom. The infiltrating sounds seemed to bother Ash to no end, but Katie couldn't get enough of it.
They also had so many people. At first Katie thought the castle was just open to the public, until she realized the multitude of people she'd seen were in fact a part of the royal family— although, less than a handful of them were truly related by blood. The Regime was lonely, even without the comparison.
Yet, Katie's favorite part of her trip lied outside of the North. It was the experience of pressing her face to the carriage window, observing the world around her.
Every single thing she passed, from giant oak trees to desolate grassy plains, it all entrapped her equally. Such a beautiful world, one she'd been barred away from. Beauties that, for whatever reason, Ash deemed 'too dangerous' or 'too unpredictable' for her to behold.
Katie continued her drabblings about her excursion, until she was cut off by a sudden yelp.
"Ah— shit!" Tubbo exclaimed, yanking his hand away from the jagged piece of metal that had just sliced him. His palm seeped trickles of bright red blood.
"Tubbo? Hold on," Katie leapt from the stool she'd been perched upon, darting over to where he stood, "I've got this!"
Before he could protest, she took his injured hand in hers, holding it tight in her grasp. The initial stinging sensation of the cut soon faded into a warm, dull buzz, as a faint light emitted in the wake of his blood.
Katie let his hand go with a resolute sigh, holding it up to admire her fine patchwork. No scar was left behind, and his hand looked as good as new.
Tubbo took a moment to flex his fingers, admiring Katie's healing abilities, before he snapped back into reality.
"Thanks a ton, Kate, but you know you're not supposed to do those kinda things all willy-nilly."
Her prideful look, fully expecting compliments and praise, morphed into one of disdain. She'd heard this a thousand times, and still didn't get it.
"I was just trying to help? You looked like you needed it."
Tubbo sighed, "I know, and I appreciate it— really. But Ash said…"
He trailed off, knowing Katie already planned on interrupting.
"Yeah, yeah. But if I see someone hurt, I'm bound to help them," she retorted. "I don't get why he doesn't understand that."
The chief mechanic couldn't exactly think of a good rebuttal to that.
In all honesty, he didn't quite understand Ash's adamancy on restricting the usage of Katie's powers either, but he knew better than to disagree with the Supreme Monarch.
"I think he's just trying to protect you. In a very roundabout way," Tubbo halfheartedly suggested.
"And I'm just trying to protect others," she sassed.
"It's whatever. I'll catch you later, Tubbo," Katie huffed, leaving the machine shop.
She inadvertently slammed the door shut with an aggressive force, the wood nearly falling off of the hinges.
Before he can reprimand her for her brutish behavior, she timidly pokes her head back in, "I didn't mean to do that, sorry!" she sheepishly apologized before leaving again.
Tubbo simply snorted at her antics— it was hard for her to stay angry, and it was even harder to stay angry at her.
The castle halls were desolate as she roamed them. There were no open windows, no 'family' portraits, and certainly no lively chatter.
She entered the desolate office at the end of the hallway, the dust that coated the doorknob clearly a sign of its vacancy.
As she squeezed through the door, she realized that at some point she'd shifted into her winged form, as her newfound appendages bumped the doorway upon entry.
She'd pieced together the fact that her wings were abnormal. Katie's yet to have met another avian, but based on clues she's picked up, not many bear wings as large or white as hers.
Katie supposed having smaller wings was more convenient. The puff of feathers she expelled upon bumping the doorframe would be a pain to clean up. Her sudden influx of molting told her that it was about time to have her primaries clipped again.
"Clipping them makes them more manageable," Ash would say as he unsheathed the scissors.
In the end, she supposed they were just yet another trait that made her special— that made her unable to go outside.
She moved to the curtains, pulled tight over the sealed window across the room. Drawing them open, she caught a glimpse of life down there. Life among the citizens of her kingdom.
While it wasn't as vibrant as what the North held, it was more than anything she could've ever wished for. The way these people went about their every day lives— the complete autonomy they had. Katie craved it more than anything.
How was it that she could feel so detached from a world she never knew?
Her people watching was abruptly cut off by a firm hand on her shoulder that yanked her away from the window.
"What do you think you're doing?" Ash exclaimed, only letting her go once he assured she was out of the window's line of sight. "You have your wings out— someone could've seen you."
Katie huffed, 'not this again…' she thought.
He didn't give her time to answer, and she figured the question was rhetorical either way. "If someone were to see you— your abilities— it would only lead to danger."
Ash now paced the floor, as he usually did when giving her these long winded scoldings. She hated the pacing. It was like he fought to find a way to do anything but talk to her straightforward.
"They can't even see me from there. I'm, like, a hundred feet above them!" she whined, gesturing to the now shut curtain.
"It doesn't matter," he grumbled, "just don't do it again."
His words were spoken as a demand. A dulled threat— he'd never truly reprimand her, yet he'd give her another hell of a lecture if she slipped up again.
"You're not like other people, Katie."
'I know', she bit her tongue, holding back her snippy retort.
"I won't let them see you."
'He always says 'them'. Who is 'them'?' Katie thought.
Ash spoke like there were specific groups of people out to get her. Ruffians who would cut off her wings and sell each feather, or delinquents that would kidnap and use her for her healing abilities.
The list went on and on of dangerous scenarios he'd make up to scare her straight— and none seemed to work. Despite his warnings, she still refused to let go of her fascination with the outside world.
She hadn't noticed he'd stopped pacing, and now looked at her as if he expected a response.
"Ok— yeah, fine. Whatever," she grumbled, going to leave the room. She made sure to close the door gentler this time, avoiding another talking-to.
"And shift out of your wings!" Ash said loud enough for her to hear from however far away she'd stomped.
The only confirmation he got was a flash of light that came from underneath the door, accompanied with a few stray feathers that made their way in too.
Katie had been on her best behavior for the past month— and boy, was it a drag not getting into any trouble.
If she wanted Ash to actually approve of her request, she'd have to get on his good side. That meant no-wings, no wandering towards the front of the castle, no unattended walks in the garden, and absolutely no window gazing.
Katie inched closer to the open entrance of the Pantheon, rehearsing her lines before entering.
"I figured that since I've had a good behavioral streak," she started.
"That maybe, for my birthday, which is a pretty big one, we could maybeee… ACK!" she startled, a sudden echoing voice reverberating through the hall.
"Katie— come out from behind the corner," Ash admonished.
Katie bashfully stepped into the Pantheon, making her way up to Ash's throne. She took mental note of the low-hum of his glitches today— that meant he was probably less irritable. Good.
"You have something you wanted to share?"
She inhaled deeply, "well, as you might know, there's a very special date coming up… In around two months and twenty-three days."
Katie could've sworn she saw a smile crack on his ice cold face, this is going well.
"Yes, your birthday. Did you want to request a specific gift?"
"Yes! And I was thinking… that since I've been on such good behavior the last month," Ash quirked a brow at her statement.
"MaybeIcouldhavemybirthdaypartyintheRegime?" she rushed.
"Aaand maybewecouldinviteabunchofpeoplefromoutside?"
The air felt stiff. A pregnant silence filled the room. Katie rocked back and forth on her heels awkwardly, hands clasped tightly behind her back. No matter how quizzically she studied Ash's expression, she couldn't decipher what he was thinking.
He finally broke the pause, "it depends on who'd we be hosting at the celebration."
She perked back up, "well, I was thinking since I met all those people from the North a while back…" She figured trailing off her sentences would leave enough implications.
Ash thought for a moment more. Out of a majority of the neighboring kingdoms, the Regime and the North were stable, trustworthy allies— despite some minor conflict.
"I'll think on it."
Pretty much everyone within the castle knew that if Ash disapproved of an idea, he'd be vocal about it. So, him not directly saying no basically implied his approval.
He sighed, rubbing his temple. Katie had left the Pantheon in a flurry, wooing and pumping her fist in glee. He hadn't seen her this overjoyed since he first brought her outside the gates.
After losing Ghostie, Ash had slammed his fist down on the Regime and all of it's members. When it came to Katie, he admits, he might've locked her up to unnecessary measures.
It wasn't just about protecting her from danger— it never was.
It was about protecting what strength she held. What she brought to the table.
Losing Katie meant losing power.
Ash wouldn't let go of the greatest weapon the Regime possessed.