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Bobby was nervous, he was pacing- they were pacing. Bobby sighed and flopped down on the bed. Bobby was in nothing but boxers and there was clothing strewn all over. Some of it belonged to Bobby, some of it didn’t. The article of clothing that was currently causing him an endless amount of anguish belonged to Jean. A dress.
Maybe wearing the dress tonight wasn’t such a good idea Bobby thought. The plan with Hank was that they were going to go get dinner at a restaurant. You know, in public. Wearing a dress out could potentially get Bobby in trouble if the wrong person saw, the whole crossdressing thing was new and Bobby wasn’t sure what to do with it yet. When Bobby had told Jean she’d leant Bobby a dress so he could just try it on and see how it felt. It didn’t feel fair to Hank, however, to ask him to stay in so Bobby could try wearing the dress. Hank was leaving for college next week and this was supposed to be their last big date before Hank left.
Bobby sighed again. Maybe he should talk to Scott. Not that Bobby was assuming that Scott would know what to do, but Scott was trans… and Bobby well… Bobby was having feelings that he wasn’t sure what to do with.
Bobby shook the thoughts away, this wasn’t the time for that right now, he had a date with Hank and Hank was supposed to be getting here in less than ten minutes. Bobby grabbed the dress, folded it carefully and then shoved it into the space between his mattress and the boxspring. Then he started foraging through his clothes to find nice jeans and a t-shirt that didn’t have text or cartoon characters on it. It was a surprisingly difficult endeavor.
Bobby had finally gotten his clothes on just as the doorbell rang signaling that Hank had arrived. Bobby grabbed his wallet and phone and ran downstairs to meet him.
They weren’t going anywhere fancy, just to a local diner both of them liked, but Bobby still had the distinct feeling that he was dressed wrong. He didn’t know what to make of that, the dress had been out of the question since they were going out, but something still felt off. Maybe if Hank came over after their date Bobby could talk to him about it, but it wasn’t a conversation Bobby wanted to have in public.
Bobby’s feelings about his clothes wasn’t all that was feeling off tonight, however. Hank was being unusually quiet. Bobby tried to take a stab at what might be bothering Hank.
“You worried about leaving for college?” he asked.
“I didn’t think I’d end up feeling this anxious about it,” Hank admitted.
Bobby nodded. Hank had been thrilled when he’d gotten accepted to his top choice college and had been going on excited rants about it for most of the summer. “I think you’ll be fine. Once you move in and get settled and stuff and get into the swing of school and keeping in touch with friends things will feel easier.”
Bobby saw Hank tense as he mentioned keeping in touch.
“Hank we’re not gonna fall out of touch. None of us. Jean’s already set up group chats on like every platform available.”
Hank sighed. “It’s not the keeping in touch that I’m worried about.”
“Then what is it?”
“Long distance relationships are notoriously hard to maintain, Bobby,” Hank said.
Bobby grinned. “We can make a long distance relationship work Hank, don’t worry.”
“That’s just it Bobby,” Hank said.
“We can,” Bobby insisted. “Scott and Warren are gonna be doing it.”
Hank shook his head. “Scott and Warren are going to the same University.”
“I thought Warren’s parents wanted him to go to that one really fancy one though,” Bobby said. Warren had fought hard to be allowed to attend a public university, his parents had agreed provided Warren attend one particular university with a reputation of being a Public Ivy League.
“Scott was accepted there as well.”
“Oh. Still that doesn’t mean we can’t make it work. People make long distance relationships work all the time Hank. It’s not like I’ll never hear from you and you’ll be coming back for holidays and stuff right?”
Hank was silent and Bobby was starting to get concerned.
“Right, Hank?”
Hank let out a long breath. “Bobby… I- I don’t think it’s a good idea for us to continue our relationship while I’m in college.”
Bobby was floored. “What? Why? Hank at graduation you said we could make it work. You were adamant that we could make it work.” Bobby’s voice cracked and his chest felt tight like he was going to cry. “What changed?”
“I realized it wasn’t fair to you. Anything could happen for you while I’m gone, I didn’t want you to feel like you couldn’t do something because you were attached to me.”
Bobby gaped. “You don’t- you don’t get to make this about me. You can’t say you’re doing this for me when you know damn well that I’ve been more than willing to put in the effort of a long distance relationship. We’ve been talking about this since you started applying for colleges.”
“Bobby…”
“Hell, Hank, we were talking about this last week about how it could be difficult but we could make it work. Last week. What happened since then that made you decide that, after a year of dating, you didn’t want to put the effort in anymore. Or had you decided before that and you were just humoring me.”
Bobby got to his feet. He was shaky and tears were welling in his eyes. He wanted to get out of there before he started crying. Bobby pulled a twenty from his wallet and left it on the table.
“Bobby I can pay,” Hank started, before Bobby cut him off.
“If we aren’t dating anymore I should pay for my own food.”
Hank opened his mouth to say something, but after a look from Bobby he closed it again and made to get up
“There’s no need to get up,” Bobby said. “I’ll walk home.”
With that he turned and left.
Bobby managed to make it almost halfway back to his house before he started crying. He was so very grateful that his parents and brother were out of town right now. They’d let him stay behind from their mini-vacation so he could be in town for the farewell party that Jean and Maddie were throwing for Hank, Scott, and Warren. Although, after tonight Bobby was thinking he might not go.
When he got home Bobby just collapsed onto his bed and curled up in a ball. His phone buzzed in his back pocket and he pulled it out. It was from Hank. Bobby swiped it aside not bothering to read it and dropped his phone on the bed. A moment later he’d picked it up again and dialed Jean.
She answered after the third ring. “Hey, Bobby what’s up? I thought you were on a date with Hank.”
“I was,” Bobby said, hiccuping as he starting to cry again. “He broke up with me, Jean.”