Chapter Text
"Shawn? Shawn!"
Shawn shook out of his daze and turned back to his father, sitting across from him at the small diner. Henry looked unimpressed and very impatient.
"I asked you a question, where's your head, kid?"
Shawn just shrugged, his eyes returning to a corner of the room over Henry's shoulder.
"Well?"
"Well what?"
"How many blue cars did we pass on the way here?"
Shawn just gave a lazy shrug.
"Alright, Shawn, what is it? You haven't talked to me since we got here. Hell, you haven't even touched your food."
Henry finally took a quick glance over his shoulder.
"Who's that?"
"Who's who?" Shawn drawled.
"Oh come on, don't play dumb, the girl you're staring at."
Shawn finally sighed and turned his body back to his father.
"That's Ashley Grace Edwards. Four foot nine, born on September 16th. Consistent B-grade student sitting in the 4th row, 3rd aisle. Her favourite colour is lilac and she's in love with Madonna. She named her cat after her, even after they brought it to the vet and found out it was a boy."
"So you remember all that but can't answer me about the cars?" His father asked, though he looked more amused than upset now.
"Well duh, she's the prettiest girl in the whole grade. School, even."
His father took a minute to pick at some remaining egg whites on his plate, which Shawn took as permission to look back at Ashley.
"Shawn," Henry began softly. "It's good to take interest in people. It certainly makes gift giving easier." He let out a quick chuckle. "But filling your head with trivia doesn't help you in the field. Knowing a victim's favourite colour isn't going to lead you to their killer. You need to focus on things more concrete. What they wear, what they drive, where they work. Focus too hard on the other stuff and your mind just gets muddled with useless information. You understand?"
"I don't see why I can't know both," Shawn mumbled.
Henry's face showed he'd almost conceded the point, but then Shawn's eyes wandered again and he frowned. "That's why. It's a distraction. I mean, do you even remember us driving here? Or that you poured syrup all over your pancakes and now they're disgustingly soggy?"
Shawn looked down, but the moisture of his breakfast didn't seem to bother him. He finally started to dig in.
"Concentrate on more substantial descriptors and you'll be fine. Trust me. You'll thank me later."
"I just think you need to appreciate originals, Shawn. It's a matter of respect."
"God, Gus, you sound like my father. You can't possibly be a Supertramp fan."
The dynamic duo is making their way into the station. They were called in—okay, that's not right, Shawn just wanted something to do—to help on a current case. It's early in the day and the two had the right of mind to grab smoothies before heading over. As they finished the last obnoxious slurps of their drinks, the famous "Cupid's Chokehold/Breakfast in America" played on the radio, which is what began their current heated debate.
"I like them as much as the next guy, and so do you," Gus continues, "You like to listen to 'Goodbye Stranger' when you're driving down the coast, all moody after a one night stand."
"First, I do that when I'm driving alone, how would you know that? And second: Oka—y, so they have like two good songs. But Gym Class Heroes take a classic and make it into something legendary."
"Here you are talking about Supertramp only having two good songs when Gym Class Heroes are a one hit wonder. Come on, son."
The SBPD station is crowded today, not in the way where there are criminals being printed and cuffed left and right, but in the way that there are officers milling about copying papers (or whatever it is they do, Shawn really doesn't pay attention) everywhere because they've yet to be called out to do something more interesting. Either it is a good day for justice, or it is the calm before the storm. Regardless, the lack of excitement is already boring Shawn and he's only just arrived, so he beelines for the Chief's office.
"And yet ask anyone which song they recognise, it'll be 'Cupid's Chokehold'. It represents every young man of this generation, Gus. We are nothing if not hopeless romantics just looking for that special person to show off."
"You know that's right," Gus starts with a smirk and his signature swipe under his nose. Shawn gives him his rightful fist bump, and then he returns to his previous point. "Listen, I like the song. I'm just saying, give credit where credit's due. The catchiest part of the song is the part written by Supertramp. Patrick Stump just adds his majestic vocals to it."
"That's Patrick Stump!?"
"Oh for G-"
Shawn and Gus push their way through the double door's to the Chief's office. Chief Vick as well as Detectives Lassiter and O'Hara, who are standing in front of her desk, turn to the source of the interruption. Today doesn't seem to be a day where this actually bothers anyone more than usual, so after confirming the source of intrusion, they go back to their previous positions.
"As I was saying, it seems pretty cut and dry so I just need one of you to go down and grab witness accounts to be thorough. I've already got McNab bringing our perp down for interrogation."
"I'd be happy to do the honours, Chief," Lassiter offers with a wide yet mischievous grin.
"Then I guess I'll be going to—"
"The set!" Shawn disrupts, fingers to his temple. "The set of…" He suddenly straightens up, pretends to fix a tie on his chest, and then reads from something invisible in his hands. "A television program that tests its contestants on their knowledge of particular subjects in exchange for cash, or sometimes inanimate objects, as a prize." He then looks up, eyebrows raised expectantly to the people in the room.
Gus suddenly slams Chief Vick's desk, startling everyone but Shawn, who points enthusiastically to him.
"What is, a 'Game Show', Alex?"
"That is correct!" Shawn exclaims.
Chief Vick sighs, holding up a hand before they can continue further. "Yes Mr. Spencer, this was on the set of a game show. Specifically, 'The Perfect Couple'. But as previously mentioned, we've already got our killer so there are no need for your services today."
Shawn slides onto the Chief's desk and is immediately met with a stare that has him jumping off just as quickly. He attempts to act natural as he places his hands on his hips instead, but he can see the smug expression from Lassiter across the room and hates that he hasn't managed to truly bother him yet today. That will have to change soon. In the meantime, "How are you sure without me there to read the scene? Come on, let me at least go check it out. Chaz Bono."
Gus clicks his tongue. "Chaz is Sonny and Cher's son, Shawn. You mean Pro Bono, which is not what we will be doing because I have bills to pay. Your bills to pay."
Shawn hears Juliet mumble "They have a son?" but decides that'll be a discussion for later. Instead he says, "It'll be Pro Bono to check it out. And then when I inevitably find something and we're on the case, you'll put us on payroll, right Chief?"
The Chief just lets out a tired sigh. "If it'll get you out of my office sooner. Go with Detective O'Hara but do not touch anything or disturb anyone's work — police or film crew. Understand me?"
Shawn and Gus give a mock salute and quickly exit the office just as Lassiter begins to stutter an argument.
"You can't just keep letting them get away with—"
"You're dismissed too, Detective Lassiter,"
Now Shawn feels just a bit more satisfied. But he really has yet to do his civil duty of annoyance. I mean he has a daily quota and he's barely skimmed the surface, so he waits just outside the door for when Juliet and Lassiter come out.
Upon seeing him, Lassiter gives a grunt and pushes past him towards his desk. Shawn is quick to follow.
"So, Lassie, 'Cupid's Chokehold' or 'Breakfast in America'?"
Lassiter gives him a brief look of confusion, clearly not expecting the question out of seemingly nowhere. His prompt attempt at anger is betrayed by the slight curiosity that remains behind his eyes.
"Gym Class Heroes or Supertramp?" Gus fills in, as if that would help the average person. To their surprise, this actually makes Lassiter's eyebrows perk up.
"I like 'Goodbye Stranger,'" He mumbles thoughtfully.
"Ha!" Gus points an accusatory finger at Shawn.
Shawn scoffs. "That proves nothing!" He skips around to the front of Lassiter and grabs his shoulders, meeting his eyes with intensity. "Lassie. When I sing Take a look at my girlfriend, she's the only one I've got, what do you sing next?"
Lassiter just stares, a frown forming again, but not the usual impatient one. For once, Shawn has actually hooked him into a shenanigan, of all things, and it is glorious to watch unfold.
"Not much of a girlfriend," He begins with hesitance, "I never seem to get a lot?"
"Ha! Hear that Shawn? No Ba ba da da's. Lassie prefers the classics—"
"Well I wasn't going to say that part out loud, I'm a grown man for—anyway, I have work to be doing so why don't you two stop distracting me and go be useless somewhere else?" And Lassiter storms off before either one can respond to the outburst. If his cheeks are a slight pink, well, neither notice given the current revelation.
They stand in silence for a solid 30 seconds.
"Cupid's Chokehold! He knows Cupid's Chokehold!"
Gus sighs, head hanging low. "I can't believe this…"
Shawn looks to the ceiling with a huge grin, shaking his head in disbelief. "I knew there was a reason I was unreasonably fond of that man, and it couldn't just be the chest hair." He gets a burst of energy and jumps, pumping a fist in the air.
Juliet chooses that moment to approach them. "You two ready, or am I interrupting something?"
"Hey Jules, Cup—"
"Yes, Juliet, we are ready to go." Gus cuts in calmly, lightly elbowing Shawn's side. The disappointment is still oozing from him, but he puts on a polite smile for Juliet's sake and follows closely as she leads them to the parking lot.
Whatever. Shawn is still vibrating from the excitement of his win and Grumpy-pants Gus won't take that away from him anytime soon. After all, they were on their way to a game show set. For annoying couples who know too much about each other. Probably finish each others sentences and everything. It was going to be awesome.