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Jaehyun slides the papers across the table quietly. He clicks the retractable pen and the sound of it echoes in the room where breathing alone can feel like an absolute addition to noise pollution. His lawyer and their friend, Ten is wearing a very starched suit that makes Jaehyun want to unbutton so that his friend can breathe just like other people in the room but then he's not surprised when he sees his soon to be ex husband's lawyer looking like he's choking too with his necktie too tight and perfect.
His eyes set towards his husband (he still is his husband unless the court says so) and notices the wrinkles around his face, nothing too noticeable unless someone really looks into it, and the discoloration under his eyes that shouldn’t be there at all. Jaehyun doesn't need to look into a mirror to see if he accumulated such flaws on his face, if he didn’t have them a few weeks ago Jaehyun is sure he has a few under his eyes now. He kicks at his own feet awkwardly, careful not to hit the bruise he somehow woke up on, to ease the tension in the room but going through a divorce is never easy no matter how both parties want to end a marriage, it’s never easy for anyone especially the people who will be affected by this.
Yuji is probably sitting in his mother's living room who is most probably folding clothes in front of the television as they both catch up on the latest episode of the noon time drama she's recently obsessed with in attempt to pretend that they're not at all shook by the on-going separation between his fathers. And there is Jaehyun, Yuji’s father, going through divorce again like it hasn’t already happened the first time in his life. While his eyes stare at his husband across the table he can see his fingers bang the the shiny linoleum coating as if to scare the hurt away, it’s not easy if both parties want this to happen but it’s even harder when both parties aren’t even sure why they’re here in the first place to nullify their marriage when they could have worked things out at home and live their life as if the storm never came.
Jaehyun wishes everything would go back to normal. Unlike his first marriage to Yuji’s mother who he married plainly because of responsibility, he knew from the moment he proposed he would be sitting in this kind of room filling out divorce papers and not giving any custody to their child because he doesn’t have an ounce of trust to leave his son with her and he was right, Jaehyun didn't have an outstanding educational background but he knew his gut was reliable, it never let him down. But things changed when he got married the second time around because he thought it could really work out, that he really does have a shot at eternal happiness. He planned everything out when he had proposed to the man he was about to end his marriage with and thought that maybe forever existed with him because there’s was no other human being like Taeyong.
He starts looking at the lawyers who were too busy talking about who’s getting who and who’s rights are theirs and Jaehyun drifts off because his brain is erratically asking himself if this divorce is required for him to be happy. On the one hand, he wants to yell at Taeyong for all the bullshit they could have mulled over, they might have to take the longer road out but he just knows they could mend this if they tried hard enough. And on the other, maybe they’re better off without each other too because their house is just one big screaming environment that he doesn’t want his son to grow up in.
But then he lets himself remember the goods things; how they would take picnics in the nearest park, Taeyong would make kimbaps very early in the morning and Jaehyun would be the one to get Yuji ready, he remembers polaroid shots stuck on bathroom mirrors and unending smiles that day. How Taeyong is so giving and supportive of his son despite not having any blood relation to Yuji, he takes him to baseball try outs and then practice once he made the team, dragged Jaehyun out of bed to make it on time for Yuji’s championship game in Suwon and how Taeyong stuttered throughout the car ride home because he had one too many bottles of beer that was sold outside the arena for very cheap, Yuji's team won that championship too. He remembers faint kisses behind his nape when he’s particularly focused on his laptop while forcing the universe to give him inspiration for his next blog entry and thoughtful post its stuck on his head when he wakes up after Taeyong’s already left for work, bringing Yuji with him to drop to school. Food already in the microwave for him to heat if he ever wakes up hungry.
His chets deflates at the memories because for the past few weeks were just fights. It took the slightest mistake Taeyong made to irk Jaehyun and the tiniest side comment for Taeyong to completely lose it, they started going to bed mad at each other and not working it out, started to ignore each other in the morning and just completely ignored the fact that their marriage was in falling apart. Jaehyun couldn’t remember how it started and how it got this huge to the point of divorcing each other just to relieve themselves of working it out because the last time he checked he didn’t despise Taeyong, he didn’t actually want to sleep without him because he’d never thrown him out of their bed before and neither did he and the biggest regret he had during this whole ordeal was when his son started to get used to Taeyong and him fighting. He had heard it once when Yuji brought a friend over because he needed to get something before they headed out again and Jaehyun heart Yuji say it with his own ears when his friend asked if his parents were okay because they caught them fighting, oh that’s not new, they always fight, and he shrugged his shoulders and got out of the house without even saying goodbye to them because they were both engrossed yelling at the top of their lungs, scratching their throats raw until someone backs down and loses.
The worst part is Jaehyun never made an effort to rectify the situation when he had noticed it the first time, he never really took Yuji’s feelings into account because all he thought about was himself. He knows Yuji is in love with Taeyong; he was a role model for him, he cared for his father because he was also the one who took care of them alongside with Jaehyun when he couldn’t even speak yet. Taeyong was there watching over him when he was just learning how to walk, he even said Taeyong's name first before Jaehyun's, never said anything bad about their son and never treated him like anyone else except his own son, his own flesh and blood.
“..ster Jung?” he shakes himself out of his reasoning and acknowledges Ten who is looking at him funnily. Taeyong is across of him looking at him with confused eyes asking are you okay? and even when Jaehyun was the one who asked for this divorce to happen, Taeyong was still open and loving to him despite forcing him out of their lives like it’s just that easy.
The time he slid the papers to Taeyong one night in their bed while the other was busy fumbling with his phone it took all his strength not to bend and break when Taeyong went silent before asking his husband if this was really necessary for them to do this, Jaehyun remembers being prideful and saying yes before turning his back towards his husband and not getting a wink of sleep as he listens to him whimper on the other side of the bed, his heart breaking into a million tiny pieces.
“I’m sorry. Could you repeat that?” he says, taking his eyes off Taeyong and directing it back to his lawyer who was explaining things about legal terms and conditions of the divorce and if there was anything he wanted to add in the contract.
“Like child custody perhaps, we haven’t discussed that-”
“No,” Jaehyun blurts out and he immediately sees Taeyong’s body act up like he was ready to pounce on Jaehyun for not granting him anything connected to Yuji who was equally his son since he had already legally adopted him. Taeyong’s lawyer was holding Taeyong down by the shoulders and Jaehyun could see that his eyes were seething, he was angry and his body language showed it and no matter how bigger in frame Jaehyun is than Taeyong he knew they were always equals in everything if Taeyong set his mind to it and he could see the look on Taeyong’s eyes, he wasn’t going to leave this room without having any custody with his child.
“Don’t do that, Jae,” he murmurs as he gets a hold of himself and settles down on the executive chair, the walls in the conference room were suddenly so dark and he felt claustrophobic especially with Taeyong’s livid eyes directed at him. He knew he provoked him to be this way and it wasn’t his intention but this reaction only seals the deal inside his head that he was making a big mistake and they would have to pry his brain open before he could make another massive mistake after leaving this room.
“I’m not.. Stop. Wait, just listen to me,” he didn’t care if the lawyers were there, he didn’t care if they had to pay higher fee for the extra time he was taking to explain how much he doesn’t want this divorce to happen.
Taeyong is on his feet again and as well as his lawyer who is holding him down just in case he tries something funny like lurch himself towards Jaehyun in anger because at this point he had cracked the code and let the beast out Taeyong was hiding all this time, who would normally wave his hand in indifference when a particularly annoying situation would arise and exhale before laying out the options he could do before he could actually get mad. Between him and Jaehyun, he was usually the most level headed because Jaehyun was all heart and Taeyong is mature enough to listen to both of his heart and mind which always grounded Jaehyun and made him whole, half of who Yuji is right now is because of Taeyong’s ability to be level headed and rational despite the circumstances.
Jaehyun stands up as well but not in a fighting stance unlike Taeyong’s body language, he takes Taeyong’s hand that’s pressed hard on the table and loosens it to the best of his abilities and he can see it in his eyes that they’re wet, eyeballs glassy and shiny like it always is when he’s getting so frustrated no matter how mature he is.
“I agreed to this divorce, Jae. Don’t take Yuji away from me too, he's all I have left,” it breaks heart to see him plead like that when he thinks he’s going to be denied of a person he had spent years on loving, raising and supporting all this time. If there’s anything more important in the world to Taeyong it’s Yuji, his son.
“I’m his father too, Jae. Don’t take him away from me just because you don't want to be with me anymore," Taeyong is in the verge of throwing a fit now, his voice is getting higher and the veins are showing in his throat area and arms, one particular vein is prominent in his right temple too which Jaehyun always kisses when he sees it and he had half a mind to cross over the table and place a gentle kiss on his temple to calm him down.
Taeyong’s lawyer is looking rather pale because he’s a relatively skinny dude with a geeky pocket protector that Jaehyun kept staring at earlier because the atmosphere was generally very awkward. He has one hand on Taeyong’s shoulder and his lips are moving to tell his client to calm down, sir and we can talk about this calmly but Taeyong keeps his place and keeps his eyes keen and stern towards his husband, pleading for him to not take away his son.
“I’m not going to take him away from you, I couldn’t do that even if you asked me to. I’m not that cruel, Tae. I may have been the husband from hell but I’m not that- I would never do that to you or to Yuji,” somehow his little confession got through Taeyong and his eyes had calmed down from seething to just plain blank to confused, the look on Ten's face was equally confused as well but there's a tiny bit of relief if he was being hopeful that this day would turn around.
“I don’t want to leave you. I was wrong to have suggested this in the first place, I was wrong to take things out on you when you were such a good husband to me, I was wrong,” the room goes terribly silent that Jaehyun wants to vomit because his insides are doing all sorts of flips when he sees Taeyong mull about what he said, there was still a chance that Taeyong wanted this to happen, maybe he’s fed up with Jaehyun stupidity and fickleness, maybe this was his way out that he wanted for so long, maybe-
“Jae..,” he silently says, his fingers twisted with his own like a rubix cube and Jaehyun could only stare at those lithe fingers before raising his eyes to meet his husband, still husband, who was confused as fuck.
Taeyong looks around the room and opens his mouth to ask for a bit of privacy from the lawyers and they agree, once they were alone in the room he stares Jaehyun down and straightens his back because this is the only time he'll ever have the balls to talk back because he's so fucking angry it seeping out of his eyes. It burns and it's hot, heavy and he just needs to let it out but he rounds the table to loop his arms around Jaehyun’s waist and settling his face in the center of Jaehyun’s shoulder blades, inhaling him something he hasn’t done in a long time.
He could never stay angry at Jaehyun.
“I’m sorry, I sprung this out on you. I just didn’t want to make a mistake and I knew if I went through with this divorce it would kill me every night thinking and worrying because you’re not beside me when I go to sleep or wake up,” Taeyong’s warmth made him feel safe, the safest he’s been in a long time like he found his security blanket after losing it somewhere under the bed and he was too lazy to find it and had to blame it on everyone and everything that was around him.
“You broke my heart when you asked me for a divorce but you broke it even further when you gave the idea that I might be excluded in Yuji’s life forever. I shouldn’t forgive you, you know? I should be divorcing you for real at this point,” Taeyong says muffled after all he has his face smushed in Jaehyun’s back, he can feel the words seep through his chest and it hurts that Taeyong is considering this but he can't actually blame him, he's been a total shithead of a husband.
“But I won’t. I promised you forever when you asked me to marry you, I said yes because I saw my future with you and Yuji and I never looked back,” Jaehyun managed to let a tear escape his eye. He doesn't know how many fairy communities he had saved in his past life to deserve this kind of husband.
“All those times you said told me to leave, told me I could do so much better than stay with you and Yuji, it hurt me. Shredded my heart to pieces but if that meant seeing you every morning and you being the last person I see before I sleep was enough to make me stay,”
Taeyong unlocks his hold on Jaehyun’s waist and turns him around so that they’re face to face and Jaehyun is too busy rubbing his face off to clear the tear tracks on his cheeks but the redness in his eyes and around his nose were a clear indication that he couldn’t hold it in anymore. He places a soft kiss on the tip of Jaehyun’s red nose and smiles, one more to his dimple that he loves so much and one last on the lips, sweeter and more chaste than any kiss he’s ever given his husband.
“You gave me everything when I had nothing. Don’t ask me to leave you again because I won’t. Let this be a lesson for the both of us, a huge lesson that we should talk about things before we sleep and not ignore it like it never happened because look where it got us?” There’s a soft smile on Taeyong’s thin lips that Jaehyun wants to kiss so that he taste it, maybe it could transfer to his face because smiling is a hard feat right now.
Taeyong holds Jaehyun’s face with both hands and brings it to level with his, shows him a billion won smile that reaches his eyes and Jaehyun thinks he’s seen his smile before, it feels like Taeyong had said yes to him all over again when he asked him to marry him.
“I love you,” Jaehyun says before flinging his arms around his husband and choking him in his embrace, a few giggles come out of the elder’s mouth and soon Jaehyun let out a laugh as well.
They have a lot of things to work on their marriage. How Jaehyun should control his feelings when he’s frustrated at something, how Taeyong should be more vocal about his own feelings as well and just all over communication improvement is what they needed for their relationship to be even stronger because if dodging a divorce that’s already far along like this is not strong then Jaehyun doesn’t know what is.
Taeyong grabs Jaehyun’s hand as they make their way out of the room to inform their lawyers that they will not be needing their assistance anymore because the divorce is off, the smile on both parties were endless and relieved because no divorce lawyer is happy to nullify a marriage no matter how broken it is. Ten makes a joke about giving discounts on payments and Jaehyun makes a thumbs up sign before walking out the building with his still and forever husband in one hand and the other waiting to hold his son’s as he relays the good news.
Jaehyun sits in the passenger seat as he plays with the radio dial and settles with an english song that has a good melody and then holds Taeyong’s free hand over the console of the car. They smile at each other and agree to pick up the other car tomorrow after they’ve had tons of makeup sex because Yuji is going to be home by dinner time so they have to cram inasmuch rounds as they can in four hours.
They’re not even sorry when they attack each other by the foyer as they take their shoes off because how long has it been since he’d been this intimate with his husband and not seen him with his angry glasses on? He’s almost let this wonderful piece of human being go because of his stupid pride and anger, Taeyong almost let go of his perfect family because of his inability to communicate well but at the end of the day what’s important is that they will still be sleeping at the same bed every night and wake up every morning to see each other’s faces for the rest of their lives.
a/n: pls tell me where to go from here hahahahaha
hope you liked it