Chapter Text
Nobody noticed when Jess got hurt.
To be fair, why would they?
She’d caught the ball and thrown it, why would it matter if she’d fallen and made a mess of her hands in the meantime?
She was taking a chance to look at them now. Sat on the edge of her bed, alone in the hotel room.
Bloody scratches, mud and sand smeared over her skin.
A better kind of blood.
A better kind of pain.
Controlled.
Dry and crusting.
She’d kept them hidden as much as possible in the changing room, and the bus back to the hotel but it probably didn’t make much difference.
They’d lost the match.
Spirits were low. No one had the energy to be worried about Jess’s stupid fucking-
“Can I see?”
Jess snapped her head up to find Lupe leaning against the door. Fair enough, it was her room too. The key was turned in the lock and she was gazing at Jess with genuine care. Concern.
They were friends, bonded over their shared peculiarities and nights at The Office.
An easy, teasing, flirty air between them but always wrapped in swagger.
Truth be told Jess’d been feeling something far deeper for a while now but it wasn’t worth the risk. She’d be starting something she couldn’t finish.
Something she couldn’t keep.
No one had looked at her like that in a long time.
So… kindly.
Jess nodded, focused on the duvet as Lupe came close. Sitting on the bed. The springs of it creaking softly with her weight.
Jess awkwardly held out her hands.
Lupe slipped her own underneath, cradling them as she inspected the damage.
She felt her breath catch. Unsure why this soft, delicate contact felt far more intense than the many sets of manicured nails that had scraped down her back during nights gone by.
“Want help getting cleaned up?”
At last Jess met those brown eyes. Full of care. Full of understanding.
Knowing what it was to be hurt and alone.
To be used to the feeling.
She nodded again. Not quite able to speak. Speaking would make it real.
Lupe might hear how feeble she’d sound.
They stood and went to the little ensuite. Jess locked the door instinctively. Whatever was happening here needed to have as many locks around it as possible.
Lupe found a clean cloth and a little cup which she filled at the sink. Even going so far as to make the water lukewarm instead of cold. Jess watched as she manipulated the taps, then placed the cup on the floor, sitting down next to it, leaning against the square edge of the hotel bath.
Jess joined her. A little clumsily. It was hard to steady herself.
Lupe raised an open hand.
Not taking.
Offering.
Jess extended one of her own. Still blindsided by how very gently it was held.
Slowly, Lupe cleaned away the dirt. Starting at the wrist, soaking the cloth with water, then the skin. Wiping tenderly. Treating every inch like it might hurt. Over the palm, up the pads of each finger, then around the knuckles. Even the ones that were untouched. Smoothing away the grit from her nails. Then washing the cloth, replacing the water and coming back to the wrist again for a second pass.
Jess was transfixed.
Lupe was being so attentive. Like even her fingers were precious. Worth looking after.
She’d never been this careful with herself. All the other scrapes and marks she’d dealt with, she rinsed once and left alone.
Proof of her strength, she’d think.
Proof of how much she could stand.
A tear slid, unbidden and unexpected, down her cheek. Lupe was nice enough not to look as she hastily wiped it away.
Both hands were almost clean now but a particularly stubborn little stone, just at the base of her palm was stuck deep and wouldn’t budge.
Lupe turned to the cabinet under the sink and pulled out her small makeup bag, picking up a delicate pair of golden tweezers.
“This might hurt a bit… sorry”
Jess just shrugged, trying for a smile, not entirely sure she was successful.
Lupe returned it then shuffled back beside her on the floor. Closer. Knees touching. She cupped Jess’s hand again, fingers brushing against it, holding a little more firmly than before. Slowly leaning down with the tweezers to pluck out the stone.
It stung, Jess hissed and Lupe pressed her lips over the spot. Instinctively it seemed. Barely making contact before pulling away.
She glanced up. Their eyes met. Jess was frozen. She watched Lupe swallow, then turn again.
She picked the cloth back up and dabbed at the new drop of red until it disappeared.
Jess was half convinced it couldn’t have been real. She must have imagined it. Must still be imagining the way her skin tingled.
The flush on Lupe’s pretty cheeks.
When the scratches were clean and dry, leaving a lattice of thin lines across the skin, Lupe moved to stand. She couldn't just leave. Not yet. Jess tugged slightly on her shirt and Lupe stopped.
“Wait…
Wait.
You kissed me”
“Yeah-
yeah sorry- I-“
“Lu…
Do it again…”
She was right. She did sound feeble.
Lupe stilled. Jess could see the anxiety in her face. Feel it in her own chest as Lupe hesitated, then carefully brought the palm back up to her lips. Placing another small kiss, right where she had before. Closing her eyes this time with the action.
Jess couldn’t breathe.
Dizzy.
They were so close still. Locked together in this small bubble they’d made for themselves. She couldn’t help herself.
She shuffled impossibly closer. Watched brown eyes flick over her face, settling right on her mouth. This was usually all so easy.
Jess swallowed. Turning her hand over, holding Lupe’s.
“…again, please-”
It was soft. Softer than she’d ever been kissed. It felt warmer and tasted sweeter and was just so… Lupe.