Chapter Text
I remember the day like it was yesterday, every single detail stuck in my mind, this by far is the worst birthday present I have ever been given. It happened three weeks ago. We were so excited; it was March 17th— it meant one more month until our birthday. Now it has changed, it doesn't mean what it is supposed to. To everyone else it means the month we were looking for her. To me it means the day I lost my best friend, Helia West. We are at her funeral right now, but I can't pay attention. I'm afraid if I do I'll run out.
It was a normal day, we went to school and walked home most of the way together then we split off. The entire way home we were talking about what we were going to do for our birthday. I remember the conversation, it seemed like the most important thing in the world. Now it is just stupid. Helia invited me to go over to her house but I declined. I told her that I had to work on a few things at my house. I just had to work on her birthday present, of course I didn't tell her that. I couldn't she wouldn't stop asking about it if I did. But maybe, just maybe if I had just postponed it one more day like how she would've told me to, she would still be here. We wouldn't be in the church of course, we would probably be at her house. We would be talking about everything we normally would, but we aren't. She is gone, at least that is what everyone says. It still feels like she is here though… I mean the body was unrecognizable after all. Maybe she is alive, maybe she is just hiding. After all it is easier to live in a comfortable lie than an unpleasant truth.
In a way, I still believe it is my fault. She has always been trusting, sometimes too trusting. But that is why we work well together, she is everything I'm not. She is the sun and I'm the moon, it has always been true; it is even in our names. If I had just been there to protect her maybe this wouldn't have happened.
She was the best thing about this town, and not just to me, to everybody. She was one of the most popular people; she helped out with everything and it was not out of image but out of kindness. She was genuinely one of the best people I have ever met, and when she disappeared everyone helped. Most people searched, some baked and prepped meals for the Wests, even the kindergartners drew cards for them. That is how much she mattered to this town.
It just doesn't make sense to me, she was kind to everyone. Why would anyone want to hurt her? Maybe if I had just— "LONDON!"
"Sorry Mom, what did you say?"
"I said, London. Like how I have been for the past five minutes."
"Oh, I'm sorry. What do you need?"
"It's time to go, the funeral ended about 10 minutes ago."
"Oh, okay. Sorry."
While we head to the car multiple people stop us to give their condolences. I personally, find it stupid. I want to go home. I want to fall apart when I'm alone in my room, all because the one person who held me together is gone. I don't understand why people can't leave it at that. I don't want their pity looks. I don't want to talk to people I don't know because it makes them feel better about themselves. I don't want people to only see me because Helia is gone.
However, Helia loved talking to people after funerals to make them feel better. So, as stupid as I thought it was, I could bear through it for Helia. But thankfully, partly because I was lost in thought, most of the people who were at the funeral had already left and gone home.
I go to the car while Mom is still talking. It still feels weird, normally I would be talking to Helia right now. She would always try to ride home with us if we were both heading home. It would somewhat be because she wanted to avoid being stuck sitting next to her little brother, Triton. I never understood it until I started going to her house more often. I don't have siblings, which is fine with me. Helia became like a sister to me and her brother reminded me of my little cousins, only more annoying somehow. I never minded it, I liked feeling included. I got to experience some of the things she complained about instead of being lost on how to respond.
When she went missing Triton started coming over more. It was weird that he came over alone but I think we both needed it. My mom would always be where she could see outside through the window by the door. As soon as Helia's mom, Mrs. West, arrived with Triton Mom would open the door and invite them both in. They would talk downstairs while Triton would come up to my room and talk to me.
"Hey,"
"Oh, hi Mom, is it time to go?"
"Yeah, are you ready to head out?"
"Yeah"
It has been weird in the house since everything happened. It is just Mom and me, it is how it has always been. However it doesn't feel like it used to. I think with everything going on, she is scared. Helia is the same age as me after all. I think my mom believes that if it happened to her that it could happen to me. We are the same age, we hang out with the same people, the only difference is how we act. If anything I'm the rude one, I am way more likely to offend someone or come across the wrong way to someone. Which once again leads me back to Why? Why her? Of all people, why Helia?
"London?"
"Yeah?"
"We're home."