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Sanji swoons over the new “girl” on the ship, spinning. Something feels off with his built in woman sensor, but you’re so pretty! The rest of the crew watches on, a few of them with knowing looks.
“Do you really like me?” You start.
“Yes!” He quickly responds.
“Even though I have a flat chest?” You’re having fun.
“Yes!” He has no idea.
“Even though I went in the men’s room?”
“Yes!”
“Even though I’m a man?”
“Y- huh?” Sanjis stops as Nami sighs in the background. She’s especially known this whole time, so has both Robin and Luffy.
“Huh? You couldn’t tell?” Luffy asks casually, swinging his legs casually. “But he was asking where the men’s bathroom was earlier.”
“I just thought sh- he was…” What you said slowly festers in his head. You’re a man. He’s been thirsting over a man that has.. one of those.
No…
He sinks to the ground. He thought you were doing something perverted in there. His hope for a perverted woman is shattered. “I got fooled..?”
“Why are you surprised I could pass as a girl as a born man?” You ask while giggling. “I thought you would be more open minded considering your captain.” Luffy turns his head to you.
“whuh?” Said captain is confused.
“I know you have your muscles but you could easily pass as a girl with some effort.” You point out but it isn’t taken well.
“What!? No! My muscles wouldn’t be hidden so easily!” His muscles are already easily hidden under his regular clothes, it’s fairly hard for him to gain mass due to his rubber tissue stretching instead of ripping, preventing it from healing over again in order to grow. The only reason he has such bigger muscles now is because of how intensely hard he’s worked, yet he still has that round and androgynous face. The only reason he’s never been confused is because he’s been so stereotypically “boy-ish” this whole time and so.. “unfeminine” acting that despite his androgyny no one’s registered him as ever being a possible girl or even something in between.
“What? No~” Nami shakes her hand in dismissal and everyone quickly disagrees to your slight surprise. You sigh. The bias of being with Luffy for so long, or really a few minutes. You just have a good eye.
“See?” The captain fusses and you smile.
“Okay, let's make a bet then-”
“Okay!”
“I didn’t say it yet.” Doesn’t seem like he’ll change his mind, though. “I’ll dress you up, properly. If it’s noticeable that you’re not a girl then you win.” You point to Sanji. “To make sure that it’s noticeable, he’ll be the judge.” Sanji sweats as Luffy looks at him with fire in his eyes. “Bet?”
“Bet!”
____________________
“Relax your face.” You remind Luffy, who keeps scowling. You continue to put makeup on him. “You don’t need much, honestly. I would’ve assumed with all the meat you eat that you would have some acne but you really don’t. The only very noticeable blemish you have is a scar. It’s rather cute, too.”
“I got this from a fierce battle with myself.”
“I understand.” You finish up the makeup. Extensions into short low pigtails, overalls skirt, sunflower tucked in his straw hat, white shirt under his red shirt to hide the muscles. You didn’t want to make him sexy, basically instead of looking boy-ish you made him girl-ish. “I don’t want you to look overly young, it’s good you have some maturity to you.” His pecs are enough for you to add cups comfortably. Good, he looks like a cute 19 year old girl. Long lashes and some blush with lipgloss helped, not much else. “Luffy you can scowl later but at least be not scowling when you first come out.” You poke his cheek. “No matter what, you’re still a guy.” He calms down.
“Right!” Cute. He walks outside, it’s okay. His crew will know him. Sanji’ll know. He walks out and Sanji turns to look at Luffy. His eyes widen and a split second passes before Sanji’s head hits the railing from the force of a lunge.
“So?” You turn to him with a smile on his face.
“No!” Luffy goes over to Sanji, bending down to look at him “It’s me!” Sanji’s eyes focus to see a cute girl on his lap, his nose bleeds.
“I win!” You proudly state but Luffy gasps, him!? Losing!?
“THIS IS-” He shakes Sanji intensely. “-HE’S BLEEDING FROM NATURAL THINGS!”
“Why would shaking him be more natural than his perversion.” Sore loser.
“IT’S ME!” A thought pops into Luffy’s head. “I still have these!” He stands up and starts pulling up his skirt until the blonde passes out with another nosebleed. You put panties on him. “NO!” Sore loser.
