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Ethan Stewart was surprised to get a call from Spencer Reid. Seeing how they haven't talked since Ethan ran away in the middle of the night, abandoning Spencer and their five year long relationship, along with their life long friendship. But Spencer called. Apparently, he's in town for work, and wants to meet up. So, Ethan told him the Bar hes been working at since moving here, and they made a plan to meet up down the road. when it was time to leave, he started walking out to where he said he would meet Spencer. Ethan was slightly on edge with the fact that if Spencer was in town something bad was happening. Every noise caused him to turn and look, someone throwing a can away, a bottle rolling, all causing him to be a bit on edge, when added to Spencer just appearing from around the corner Ethan jumped.
"Jesus Spencer you scared me." He admonished his old friend.
"I've always been a step ahead of you man." he joked.
Spencer taking the man he hadn't seen in years in. Blatantly looking him up and down, causing Ethan to do the same. The slightly younger man somehow looked the same and entirely different. Still slightly shorter than Ethan, but it was clear immediately that something was wrong. The ever present circles under his eyes were worse, he was somehow skinnier which Ethan thought wasn't possible, and he just looked wrong.
"I'm glad you called, its good to see you."
"You too."
"Lets get a drink."
Ethan led them to the jazz club he works at, saying hello to the bouncer as they passed.
The place was nice, low lighting, the place looks like the kind of place you would smoke a big old stogie in. It being early in the night the place is still quite empty, but Spencer could imagine the place full of people drinking, and listening to music.
"Hey James can I have a whiskey, and a brandy for my friend."
"sure thing"
The bartender started preparing their drinks as Spencer's phone rang. Spencer pulled it out and saw Prentiss calling, he feels that familiar annoyance and jealousy that he feels towards her bubble up, and silences the call putting his phone away.
"So are you going to ask the question?" Ethan asks, picking at the peanuts he got from the bar.
"what question?" Spencer feigns ignorance. Knowing full well what Ethan is alluding to.
"C'mon man, its me here. We haven't talked to each other in years. I know its why you called me. Ask the question."
"Why did you quit FBI training after one day?"
James comes over and hands them their drinks, they take them with quick thanks. Ethan rolls his drink around the glass looking over the rim at Spencer.
"I'm sure you've considered the evidence, analyzed the signs, whats your theory?"
"You were battling your own demons you didn't have time to analyze someone else's"
"Not bad, not bad. Those days I did prefer Jack Daniels to Jeff Dahmer." he leans in poking Spencer in the chest "But they both weigh on your soul eventually."
Spencer's phone rings pulling them out of their little bubble. "Sorry" Spencer whispers looking to see Prentiss calling again before putting his phone away once more.
"The bat-phone" Ethan says in his best batman voice getting a little smile from Spencer.
"Let me ask you this Ethan, Do you ever regret it?"
"Well, I may not be changing the world, but my music makes me happy. it doesn't take a profiler to see that your not."
Ethan takes his drink over to a chair, Spencer following behind him after paying James.
"It's not easy. It's not… I don't even believe some of the things I've seen."
"John Coltrane. he was a genius too. Died of cancer, but most people think it was the booze and heroin that did him in."
"what are you trying to say?" Spencer once again trying to feign ignorance.
"You look like hell."
Spencer looks away before folding in on himself
"I'm fine."
"C'mon man, I'm a jazz musician in New Orleans. I know what it looks like when someones not well. This may be the one time I can tell you something you don't already know" Ethan points to the glass in Spencer's hand
"It might help you forget, but it wont make it go away. And if I can tell…" Ethan leans forward into Spencer's space
"You're surrounded by some of the best minds in the world, and if you think they don't notice…" Ethan sticks his hand out and wobbles it mimicking trembling hands
"Well for a genius, that's just dumb."
Spencer lets that sit taking his first sip of his drink, debating bringing up the elephant in the room. His phone rings, he silences it without even looking.
"Do you ever regret leaving the way you did?"
"Every day. Honestly I'm surprised you called at all, thought you would've hated me."
Spencer stared into the amber drink in his hand.
"I tried, but I cant. You broke my heart, I wanted to be mad, I wanted to hate you. I wanted to destroy your things, and scream and cry and never think of you again, but I couldn't. I could never hate you."
"I am sorry I walked out on you, I am sorry I hurt you, I am sorry I left without explaining. I was burnt out and spiraling, I couldn't do it anymore, and I was a coward for leaving the way I did. I should've talked to you, I should've accepted your help all those times you offered. I am so sorry."
Spencer finally looked him in the eyes, "I forgave you a long time ago."
With Spencer's words a weight was lifted off Ethan's shoulders.
"Well, I would like to continue to make it up to you, if you'd be willing to be friends again?"
"Only if you tell me what you've been doing for the past 4 years."
"I can do that. well, as you know, when I left I moved back home. Got a job at the gas station down the road from my house, and tried to feel like a normal person. I stayed there for a year, working and saving up. I didn't start to feel better until I started playing piano again, I also learned violin for funsies. I moved out here in 2004 after I saved up a good bit of money. Got my job here, I also teach kids to play piano and violin and I tutor for a bit of extra cash. Luckily I got out pretty unscathed during Katrina. Apartment and work both okay it was nothing short of a miracle. How did you know I was here anyways?"
"Your Mom told me"
"My Mom told you?"
"Yeah, did she not tell you that her and I have kept in touch?"
"No??"
"Yeah. Well, we don't talk very often, but we send each other birthday cards and Christmas cards, she checks in with me if our cases make national news. First thing she said to me after we broke up is I was still a son to her and I was always welcome in her home."
"Good. I'm glad, I'm just surprised she never told me."
Spencer's phone rang again, Spencer silenced it again with barely a glance.
"Do you need to take that?"
"No, I don't think I should be in the field tonight anyways. Are you preforming tonight?"
Ethan looked at him concern lacing his features before looking down at his watch eyebrows raising at the time.
"Yeah, I gotta go get ready will you stay and watch?"
"I would love to."
So Spencer stays. As Ethan plays Piano, he nurses his drink having very good self restraint and only having the one, he is still technically on the clock. Ethan plays like a master, it had been years since Spencer had seen Ethan play, seeing how he all but stopped when they went to university. He looks happier up there then he ever did in any lab. Spencer stayed until Ethan was off work.
"you're coming to my house" Ethan was less asking and more telling "don't care if you're some fancy FBI agent now you're not walking alone this late at night."
"Okay" Spencer didn't put up a fight. More then happy to avoid his life for a little while longer.
They walked side by side through the streets of the French Quarter all the way over to Ethan's small one bedroom apartment. It's a mess, as Ethan's space has always been. A picture on the wall catches Spencer's eye, its a picture of the two of them, side by side Spencer in his grey and red Doctoral Regalia and Ethan in his black cap and gown for Spencer's first PhD convocation and Ethan's first masters convocation. They had professional photos done for their engineering PhD/masters. Both of them didn't attend any of the other graduations as they are all the same. Seeing the picture displayed makes Spencer feel fuzzy inside his copies are in his photo albums that he hasn't looked at in years
"this place is nice" Spencer said prying his eyes away from their 15 year old faces
"yeah, its cheap which is the main thing. I had an idea on our walk here, I know how much you used to hate tech, and I'm sure that hasn't gotten better. What do you think about writing letters to each other?"
"I'd like that"
Ethan started walking into what Spencer assumed was his bedroom
"let me grab you some clothes to wear you can get a shower if you want while i turn the couch into a bed"
Ethan comes back out with a t shirt and some sweatpants handing them to Spencer before leading him to the bathroom where he has a quick shower putting on the shirt and pants he heads back out to the living room where there was once a couch there is now a fully made bed
"whoa a pull out nice"
"yeah I have people crashing here quite frequently so it was most definitely worth the money"
"goodnight Ethan"
"goodnight Spencer"
both boys go to sleep and Spencer heads back to the precinct the next day in a slightly better head space