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"I love you."
Those were the three words that threw Merlin's world upside down.
Three words that morning, when Arthur had insisted that they go for a ride in the woods like old times, and he had taken him to his favourite spot and confessed those three words.
Merlin knew he loved Arthur, he was devoted to him body and soul, he cared for him so very deeply to the depths of his very being.
Yet Merlin didn't know if he'd ever experienced love, at least in the romantic sense.
"You don't have to say anything in response, if you do not feel this way for me, we can continue on. I know you care for me, you always have, and now things are different with magic returned and you being my court sorcerer. I wanted to tell you how I truly feel, how I've always felt," Arthur said so earnestly taking Merlin's hand softly in his, and reaching down to kiss it.
It didn't feel strange, it felt warm, and comfortable, because he was Arthur, his king, the man he trusted most in the entire world.
A man who had been so honest right here today with him, and so he breathed in deep and decided to be honest to.
"Arthur, I- I have to tell you something, something that may, and probably will change your feelings for me, and that's okay, I won't be mad," Merlin explained softly.
"I don't think anything could ever change how I feel for you, but please tell me anyways," Arthur replied.
Merlin sighed, it was now or never.
"I care for you, so very deeply. When I found you I was instantly drawn to you even when you tried to take my head off with a mace," he winked and Arthur chuckled.
"I love you Arthur, but I don't know if I've… If I've ever loved someone in a romantic sense… Which probably makes no sense but just listen please."
Arthur smiled and kept watching him intently.
"I have never really found people attractive, in the sense of I've never had the desire to have physical relations with another person. I'm not adverse to the idea of having sex, I- I have done it before, but I didn't really care much for it, but I cared that the person I did it with found connection and love through that. I don't know if I romantically love you, but I do know that I care for you and love you so terribly much. I would do anything for you. If you still love me and wish to court me, I would be honoured and would love to do so with you, but I understand if this isn't what you wish. I will respect and care for you regardless of your feelings," he said softly.
"Oh Merlin, my Merlin, my dearest most beloved friend, none of that changes a thing," Arthur said throwing his arms around Merlin in a tight embrace.
"I understand what you're saying, I understand that your feelings are complex, but I also understand your devotion is deep, your love however you say it is, is true, and I wish to return it, so Merlin of Ealdor, Court Sorcerer of Camelot, Emrys of the Druids will you do me the honour of allowing me to court you?" Arthur said getting down on his knees.
Merlin chuckled a wet laugh, "Yes, you clotpole, I'd be happy to court you."
Arthur stood up and picked up Merlin swinging him around in a joyful embrace, before placing him back down, and asking, "May I kiss you?"
Merlin smiled and cupped Arthur's jaw kissing him in response, and it felt like coming home.