Work Text:
“Holy shit.”
Builderman froze, staring at his creation, who was currently trying to fall off his office desk.
“Holy shit I did it.”
He scooped up the small…kid? Creation? Pill baby? Whatever. He scooped it up and walked out of the office as quickly (and gently) as possible. Holy shit, it actually worked.
Builderman kept walking despite all the weird glances and concerned eyebrow raises he received as he passed his employees and coworkers. He needed to show Shedletsky what he had created. The creation started making a fuss around the 15 minute mark of his search for that stupid avian, so he took off his jacket, his precious jacket, wrapped it up in a makeshift blanket burrito, and continued walking.
“For the love of Telamon, where is Shed-”
Builderman rounded a corner.
Straight into Shedletsky.
Thankfully he managed to protect the small thing from the impact of the crash, and it didn’t even cry (barely)!
“Woah dude, ya good?...What are you holding?” Shedletsky asked in a slightly amused tone. Before Builderman could explain anything, he saw Brighteyes peek out from behind Shedletsky. Oh for the love of-
“You’ll never guess what I did.” Builderman responded, and practically shoved his small creation, which had started crying by now, into Shedletsky’s arms. He caught it, examining it for a long while, long enough to make Brighteyes curious. She began to check it out too, expression ranging between awe and confusion.
“...”
“...so-”
“You gave birth?”
“Wha- NO?!”
“WHERE DID THE BABY COME FROM THEN?”
The “baby” in question had resumed its crying, and before any of the two (middle-aged) men could quiet down, Brighteyes scooped it up and began to rock it. Almost immediately, the thing calmed down and went back to sleep in her arms.
“Builder…I have to ask, where did you get the baby from?” She asked, still rocking the baby to sleep.
“Did you actually give birth.” Shedletsky helpfully added after deciding now would be a perfect time to preen his head wings.
“Oh my Telamon, no! I made it.”
The pair looked at each other, then at Builderman, and then back to each other. Before Shedletsky could make another comment, Brighteyes cut him off. “How in the world did you make a baby? WHY would you make a baby?”
“The whole ‘how’ thing is really hard to explain,” “So you don’t know,” “Shedletsky, shut up. I simply wanted to see if Robloxians could be created instead of…birthed?” Builderman explained.
The two fell silent again.
“Are you going to raise it?” Brighteyes asked.
Ah, shit. He never thought about that.
“..I’m not sure. I didn’t think I would get this far, to be frank.”
His work schedule had been a nightmare recently, so he wasn’t sure why he thought making a BABY would be a good idea. “I’ll figure something out.”
“What’s its name?”
“Pardon?”
“Its name. You were planning on naming it, right?”
“Of course!”
“You should name it John.” Shedletsky commented, before moving to preen his other head wing after the first one had been properly cleaned.
“After you?” Builderman rolled his eyes. Of course Shedletsky would want the baby named after him.
“No like- wait it would be sick to name a child after me- but like, John Doe or something like that.” Shedletsky replied. “Since it don’t really got a ‘real’ identity. Y’know, born in a lab and stuff?”
“You want to name a baby after the fact that it doesn’t have parents?” Brighteyes asked, slightly horrified at the implications of the name.
“I’m the parent.” Builderman shot back.
“I thought you didn’t give birth-”
“Stop.”
“My bad.”
Builderman sighed and took the baby back into his arms. He stared at its sleeping face and really, really tried to give it a more meaningful name. But nothing came to mind.
“For now,” he said after a while. “For now, its name is John Doe.” He turned to Shedletsky. “And you will NOT tell it why. Understood?”
“Aye aye, captain.” Shedletsky mock saluted before heading to the kitchen.
Brighteyes stayed for a beat longer, simply staring at it John.
“And you’re certain you can take care of a baby right now?” She asked, her words dripping with concern. “You have a tight schedule, and no offense, but I’m not sure how well you’ll be able to care for him…”
“I’ve got this, Bright. Don’t worry.”
“...I sure hope you know what you’re doing.” She turned to follow her husband into the kitchen.
Builderman sighed and took another look at the child, his child.
“I really hope so too.”