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"Your secret is safe with me." They whispered, the bow that was previously attached to their neck, now atop Jax's head. He couldn't do much other than stare at it for a few seconds, a million things running through his head. But the one emotion he felt was sickeningly prominent, was comfort. His ears slowly lowered, as Jax glanced over at Ribbit.
As he did, there was no doubt in his mind that they were being sincere. If it weren't for the spotted green lighting behind them, illuminating the wall and capturing their frame like some sort of angel, Jax probably wouldn't have fully believed them. It did feel strange, being able to open up so effortlessly to someone he didn't even know outside the circus, but for Ribbit, there wasn't much hesitance when it came to their story, so it was nice knowing that they trusted him. He just had to ask himself if he felt the same.
Ding-Dong
When the sudden sound of a doorbell reached his ears, they shot up almost immediately. The thought of anyone else seeing him like this, even as simple and stupid as having a bow on his head, Jax could feel his heart racing; something he hadn't felt before when next to Ribbit this whole time. With his eyes wide and locked onto the door, he felt the urge to rid of any evidence, throw the bow onto the floor and make sure no one ever saw this side of him again. But if he did so, that would mean he would need to keep Ribbit quiet about it as well.
But he didn't. Jax didn't budge.
And it was only because Ribbit was there to place a comforting hand on his shoulder. And it was almost as if the beating in his chest that was so unbearably painful seemed to vanish right then and there.
"Hey, Ribbit, you in there?" A voice called out from behind the door, Kaufmo's voice, unmistakably.
Ribbit gave Jax a smile, squeezing his shoulder once before standing up to approach the door. As they did, Jax felt that same feeling; dread. They clearly stated that his secret was safe with them, were they actually going to let Kaufmo just walk in and see Jax? He shook his head, trying to abandon the thought. They wouldn't betray him just like that...
Right?
With Jax's hands held close to his chest and prepared to hide away the moment he felt eyes other than Ribbit's on him looking like...this, he held his breath as they turned the doorknob, only to open it ever so slightly. Enough for Kaufmo to see them, but not Jax. Which made him immediately relax, but not fully, since Kaufmo was still outside the door, much to Jax's dismay.
"What's up, Kaufy?" Ribbit asked, peeking at him through the door.
The clown smiled at the sight of them, worried he might have to go on some long scavenger hunt just to find the frog.
"Ah, good... you're here. You wanna head up to the cafè to grab some hot chocolate?" He asked, pointing his thumb near the exit of the hall.
Ribbit fought back the urge to peek over at Jax in that moment, as if to ask if he wanted to go or stay for a little longer. But they didnt, instead, they only nodded towards Kaufmo.
"Sure, just uh... give me a minute." They assured, pointing a single finger gun towards the other, a play at their usual, carefree self. Luckily, Kaufmo didn't seem to catch on that they were acting slightly off, nor question the missing bow on their neck, instead, he gave a thumbs up back and began walking off towards the main area of the circus. Before he fully left, and before Ribbit could close the door, Kaufmo mentioned one last thing.
"If you see Jax, ask him to join us! It wouldn't be the same without him!" The clown shouted out, the distance between him and Ribbit's room large enough to do so without being annoying.
Ribbit didn't respond, and only closed the door quietly. Peeking over at Jax, worried he might not want to go hang out with Kaufmo. But they didn't want to leave him here alone. Taking a few strides towards Jax, who was currently hiding his face in his knees, they kneeled in front of their bed, placing a hand on his arm to try and comfort him.
That word again. Comfort. There are a few meanings behind it. It could mean to cheer one up by comforting them that something will go their way, or it could mean to console, an attempt to ease grief or pain. It was hard to say what kind of comfort Ribbit was trying to provide, even they themselves didn't know how to fully help Jax with his worries after he spilled his story onto them. Not that they minded, of course, but with being stuck in cartoony-like bodies inside of a digital circus without any known way of changing that, how do you comfort someone?
"I can't go out like this.." Jax muttered, tears forming at the corners of his eyes. The idea of someone else seeing him in this way made his stomach churn in a nearly sickening way.
Ribbit looked down, comtemplating the words they wanted to share. What could they say? If anything at all.
"No one said you had to, Jax." They stated, reaching upwards to retrieve the bow from Jax's head. His reaction was surprising, to say the least, the way he almost attempted to reach for the bow as if he wanted it to stay. Yet Ribbit still took it back, adjusting it back onto their neck.
Jax sighed in response, uncovering his face from behind his knees. But his tears didn't go away. Something Jax couldn't quite understand.
"I told you," Ribbit continued, wiping away any stray tears that Jax desperately didn't want to fall. "Your secret is safe here, with me." If Jax had tears he let fall freely, Ribbit would be there to catch them. "Now come on, where's the funny guy at? Kaufmo needs him." They finally stood, placing a hand on their hip as they reached out towards Jax, offering their hand for him to take.
He muttered a small "Thank you." In response. And with that, Jax shook his head with a laugh, taking their hand without any hesitance. Raising his head for his eyes to meet Ribbit's, that familiar shit-eating grin made itself known. The kind of Jax that wasn't afraid around the others. The funny one.
"There he is!" Ribbit yanked his hand, dragging him towards the door before pulling them both outside and into the hall.
.•°
After that, Jax ended up hanging out in Ribbit's room more than he would like to admit. It was like he had two completely different personas now, and only one was he more comfortable with. Everyone knew Jax as the one who liked fucking around with everyone, who seemed to take in his new home with ease compared to when he first arrived. But only one other knew about his past, and how he truly felt. A part of him wanted to shove them away, to make sure it was never brought up or mentioned again. But he just couldn't bring himself to do so.
Today was like any other day, the rest of the group went on their casual adventure that Caine had planned and ended up either being exhausted or ready for another. Jax being the latter.
And still, like any other day, he wound up exactly where he wanted to be.
In Ribbit's overly green room.
"So... what is it?" The frog asked, tapping a finger onto their chin a few times, squinting at Jax who was sat rather stiff on their bed. Once more, Ribbit's small red bow was on Jax's head, which was more of Ribbit's idea.
"Huh?" Jax asked.
"I mean like..." Ribbit continued, pacing around their room a few times, as if deep in thought. It had only been a few days since Jax spilled his backstory and feelings onto Ribbit, so it wasn't strange that they were still trying to figure things out, at least, enough to help Jax feel a little better about himself. "Is it just the bow? Like is that it?" They asked, tilting their head slightly.
Jax paused for a second, contemplating their words. Though still puzzled.
"What do you mean?"
Ribbit groaned in response, placing their fingers onto the sides of their head as if trying to visually pick at their brain.
"Is the bow all you need?" Ribbit questioned. "Cuz it's the only one I got."
"Still not following."
"How about if I call you... pretty?"
A silence drew between the two, one that someone could take a knife and cut right though. Jax's eyes seemed as if they couldn't get any wider. And he could have sworn his heart skipped a beat or two. Maybe three, he lost count.
"Okaay... that got a reaction." Ribbit smiled, one that held no mischief or ill intent.
Jax immediately turned his head away, though it was clear a blush was dusting his purple cheeks. Something about the way they said it, the gentle nature behind their voice, Jax wished to hear it again, but didn't dare ask.
"What about..." Ribbit took a small step forward, hands behind their back as they pried further. "Beautiful? Cute? Gorgeous?" Each word came out like a stab right in the heart, but in a strangely and almost endearing way.
"Okay! Stop that." Jax finally replied as Ribbit seemed to be just getting started. But still, Jax couldn't stop the heat that rose up his neck and the feeling of validity deep down.
Ribbit listened, but only after taking a spot next to Jax on their bed.
"I told you, dude, you're safe here." They reassured, nudging his shoulder slightly.
They sat in near silence for a solid minute or two, no intruders or interruptions, just them and their thoughts. And if their thoughts were visible, it'd be pretty hilarious to see the contrasts between the two.
"...it again." Jax mumbled, quiet enough that even despite the silence, Ribbit could barely hear him. Which caused them to perk up and turn towards Jax with a questioning look on their face.
"Did you say something?" They asked, hands landing on their crossed legs as they tried to see his eyes, which he was currently attempting to hide away.
He didn't respond, at least, not for a bit, as if swallowing his own words back down before they came out unannounced.
"Can you..." He started, louder than before this time, but with more pause between his words. If he had a lip to bite, he would be bleeding from how hard he'd bite down. Instead, his leg was practically bouncing up and down at a rapid pace, which Ribbit noticed instantly, allowing their hand to rest on his.
"Say it again..." Jax finally finished, keeping his eyes closed.
Ribbit immediately let their shoulders relax, not laughing to make him feel bad, nor rejecting his request. They only inched closer in order to embrace Jax in a side-hug of sorts.
"You're very pretty, Jax." Ribbit wasn't sure if that's exactly what he was requesting, but the way Jax slumped his shoulders slightly, they could tell it's something he's wanted to hear for a long time. Obviously, Ribbit was not the best at compliments like this, it was clear in the way they said it that it was sincere and genuine, which was enough to make Jax nearly burst out crying then and there.
And so he did. As simple as that.
.•°
"Where did you get these?" Jax asked, peeking into a small mirror located inside of Ribbit's room. The bow wasn't on Jax's head anymore, but there were plenty of other ways that (s)he could express herself. Take, for example, the many bows littering Jax's ears.
"Heh, let's just say I asked Caine for a few more. My excuse was I kept losing them. He seemed all too happy to oblige." Ribbit chuckled, searching through the drawers in their room for anything else to allow Jax to feel more comfortable.
It was funny to think about it, again, the idea that Jax had two different sides to him when it came to this circus. And he wasn't even complaining anymore. Whenever he was tired, or sick of being treated how he was, (mostly due to his own actions) he would retreat to Ribbit's room, only to be respected and considered in ways she wanted to be for the longest time.
Ribbit seemed to be doing pretty well at keeping it a secret as well. As well as they could, anyway.
Jax eyed herself in the mirror, turning her head from side to side as if trying to get a better look. Ribbit skipped up behind her, placing a pink, spotted bow just below her head, where her neck was. Exactly where Ribbit wore theirs.
"Look at this work of art," Ribbit snickered, adjusting the bow a few times as if they wanted it to be exactly centered. "Isn't she lovely?"
"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were trying to flirt." Jax peered at Ribbit through the mirror, which only caused them to glance away as if they weren't the perpetrator. "Keyword; trying." Jax mumbled, eliciting a smack from Ribbit.
Funny, isn't it? How could someone find such comfort inside a place meant to mock them?
Turns out, sometimes it just takes a friend who understands.