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[NOTICE] Announcement Regarding BOYNEXTDOOR Myung Jaehyun's Condition and Schedule…
Benevolently, Donghyun and Woonhak both offered their rooms up once Jaehyun came back from the hospital, but Jaehyun tearfully declined, still spending his nights in the living room. Something about sentiments, or philanthropy, or the 75 inch flat screen TV that makes couch-rotting all the more immersive. It was probably all of the above. The volume can also go ridiculously high, so that’s how Donghyun knows that Jaehyun is rewatching the entirety of the Twilight series at 1 AM. It’s a miracle that Woonhak hasn’t woken up yet.
“Hyung,” Donghyun says, appearing at the side of the couch, and Jaehyun jolts, metal spoon clanking on the floor. “Are you enjoying the show?”
“Ah! Shit,” Jaehyun curses, scrambling to pick up the spoon. He bends awkwardly, injured leg hoisted on the coffee table and the other shuffling around aimlessly. The search is fruitless with the room dark, so Donghyun flicks the light on. Once Jaehyun comes back up, he turns it off again.
“Sorry, Donghyun-ah. Did Hyung wake you up? I didn’t mean to,” Jaehyun says. Donghyun is about to say no, because he couldn’t fall asleep with the TV blasting anyways, but he’s interrupted by the sound of metal again, this time hitting the back of Jaehyun’s teeth. Five second rule, sure. “I’m just…” He says, mouth full, sniffing a little bit. He notices Donghyun glancing over at the half-empty tub of ice cream on his lap. “Sorry, sorry. I was hungry. I know it wasn’t all for me. I’ll put it back after this—”
“It’s okay, hyung, you can have it,” Donghyun says.
“Really? Sorry. Thanks,” he quickly accepts, “I’ll buy some more tomorrow, okay?”
“It’s fine,” Donghyun says, nodding. When Jaehyun’s all soppy and chatty like this, he’s cute. His hair is unwashed and his tanned skin is kind of unhealthily dull, the way fans would want it, but he still looks cute. Too bad Jaehyun wouldn’t let their fans see him like this anyways. Earlier today, he’d been typing up a storm with impressively drenched cheeks about how much he wanted to see onedoor again. “You should get some rest instead. I can try and order it again, if you want.”
“Donghyun,” Jaehyun says, and for a long minute, he doesn’t say anything else. Bella Swan’s talking, but Donghyun waits for Jaehyun. “You’re so nice to me…I’m sorry.”
“That’s the fifth time you’ve said sorry,” Donghyun says. “What are you apologizing for?”
Instead of responding, Jaehyun takes another scoop, licking the spoon front to back like no one’s watching, like Donghyun can’t picture his shadowy silhouette with color. Maybe that's what he’s hoping for, but there’s nothing wrong with every side of him, honestly. Even the gross ones that slobber unclean utensils that fell on the ground and threaten to put them back in the shared ice cream pint. Jaehyun pauses the movie. Donghyun hears sniffling again.
“I didn’t mean to be so weak,” Jaehyun grumbles. “I mean, I guess you saw what happened. It was an accident. Not like anyone fractures their bones on purpose, but. I’m not even bad at popping. Like, we do that so much already, and I have extra experience with it at YG, but…I don’t know. It’s kinda pathetic.”
“Maybe, but that’s because you were pushing yourself hard again,” Donghyun says. “You know? We all are, but you must’ve been pushing yourself the hardest.”
Jaehyun snorts. “You can just say it’s pathetic.”
“If you want me to say it,” Donghyun agrees, shrugging halfly. “That’s the concept, though, isn’t it? So it’s fine.”
“Yeah…” Jaehyun says, rolling his oversized sleeves down further, sweater paws materializing. Lost in his thoughts, maybe, he wiggles his socked toes before saying, “It’s just. Right before our first studio album, though…It’s such a mess. I don’t want to be without you guys. And I don’t want you guys to have to clean up my messes.”
“We’ll leave your space open then,” Donghyun says. He really gets him. They’ve always shared the deepest things in common, both being the last members confirmed to debut, awkwardly wrenched between an already established roster, humbly wondering when it was their turn to be free in whatever sense of the word they could get. Truly emotionally close, Donghyun knew he could say whatever and Jaehyun would understand his code if no one else could. “I don’t think you’re a mess.”
“Hey, I didn’t even say that!” Jaehyun says, tone wronged at first, and then he’s bubbling with laughter.
“I know. That’s good,” Donghyun says. “You didn’t do anything messed up, so you don’t have to apologize.”
“…I don’t know how you do it,” Jaehyun says, amazed out of nowhere. Then, in the dark, he’s leaning over the side of the couch, unclosed ice cream tub and injured ankle forgotten, grabbing Donghyun into a soul-crushing hug. “I love you. I love you. Hyung loves you a lot, okay?”
“I know,” Donghyun says, arms gauchely glued to his sides, flustered. Jaehyun should really sit down and reposition his leg, but he’s so adamant on showing his affection, always, so Donghyun meets him in the middle and wraps his arms around him too, leaning into him and ensconcing him back on the couch. “I love you too,” he manages to say, and Jaehyun nuzzles him a bit. When they pull apart, he asks, “how I do what?”
“You know,” Jaehyun slides the ice cream onto his lap again. “Be so optimistic all the time. And as much as I may make fun of you for it, you always know exactly what to say, too. It’s so refreshing, and exactly what I need, but I just can’t do it.”
“But I don’t know how you do it either,” Donghyun says back.
“Huh? Do what?” Jaehyun asks.
Donghyun’s reading over Jaehyun’s face as much as he can, remembering the dimmest lit parts in his head easily. “I meant that you’re so affectionate in everything you do,” he says. “Even when you’re injured, it’s sort of like you did it with love.” Comically, Jaehyun’s breath hitches. “And I want to do that, too.”
“Do you mean that? Don’t go around breaking your ankle, too!” Jaehyun scolds. He’s got his own kind of dark humor that Donghyun respectfully tries not to laugh at. “You’re very affectionate, Donghyun-ah. You always cheer everyone up during practice. You look out for us on long schedules. You’re checking up on me right now, and I…” Jaehyun’s sniffling again. “I’m really thankful for you.”
“I’m thankful for you too,” Donghyun smiles. “I want you to have a good time off for now.”
“I’ll try,” Jaehyun says, brows determined. “I want to come back as the best version of myself,” suddenly self-aware, he looks down, “so maybe I should start putting this ice cream away…”
“If you feel like you’re done, I’ll put it away before I go to bed,” Donghyun offers.
“Oh, right!” Jaehyun says, alarmed. “We should go to bed right now. There’s a pre-recording tomorrow, so in the morning we should…” He sighs at his ankle when he realizes. “Nevermind. I forgot all about this dumb thing.” He hands the pint over to Donghyun. “Goodnight, Donghyun-ah.”
Donghyun takes it with open arms and says, “goodnight, hyung.” He’s walking over to the freezer when he remembers to ask, “if you’re still watching TV, can you turn down the volume?”
“Yeah, sorry!” Jaehyun calls, but the living room is pitch-black now. “Sleep well!”
“You too!” Donghyun sweetly calls back down the hallway.