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Tom was a good person once. At least he thinks he was.
He remembers the way he would hold strangers’ hands in the supermarket, thinking it was his mom. And giggling whenever he found out it wasn't, earning a pat on the head by a few of them.
He remembers giving his drawings to his teacher at school, loving the way she smiled at him with affection or helping his father in the garden. Planting flowers for his mom or mowing the lawn (his father did it, because Tom was just a toddler, but he was there).
He even remembers that one time in high school, when a friend of his convinced him to go to a protest for women rights. It was an interesting day, to say the least.
Tom remembers times like this, when he was this cute kid that people used to call ‘Sunny’ because he just couldn't stop smiling and blinding everyone with his eagerness.
Even when his father got into that stupid accident, Tom never stopped smiling, reassuring his mother that he'd always take care of them, wherever he was.
He never stopped believing that, actually.
Now, these memories almost feel like they don't belong to Tom. They seem so far away. Impossible compared to what he is right now.
Tom Ryder from the present times is an idol for a lot of people. He has everything anyone could ever dream of. Fame, a job he actually likes, money (tons of it), women/men (he's not picky) and a wardrobe the size of Florida.
The American dream, isn't that right ?
What a bunch of bullshit.
All that crap only corrupted Tom as time went on. He started to lose himself to this fame and the sex and the money.
The American dream doesn't exist, it only ruins lives and changes people.
For a while, a really long while, Tom thought that's what he wanted. What he deserved, what he needed. He started to behave like an asshole, he's aware of that, but he liked it. Because it gave him the attention he needed.
Groaning whenever a director told him to change his acting for a scene, sleeping with literally anyone that comes his way and treating everyone like he's better than them.
That's what Tom is now.
Not ‘Sunny’, the smiley little kid that everyone loved, but Tom the famous actor who couldn't care less about hurting people.
Truth is, he doesn't know how to be a good person anymore.
He's accepted the new him, he grew used to it.
And he learned to ignore his mother's somewhat disappointed state whenever he was back home and talking about this director that didn't want Tom to say a specific line he added. Or this makeup artist that just couldn't do his job right.
One day, he was sitting on his mother’s couch, scrolling on his phone, searching for posts about him.
He then heard her coming over and sitting next to him, staring at him so intensely he genuinely thought she was about to dig holes though him.
She didn't, thank God for that.
Instead, she reached out and ran her fingers through Tom's hair.
“You know I love you, Sunny”, she said.
For some reason, she never stopped calling him ‘Sunny’.
He never asked her to stop, either.
Tom frowned, turning off his phone to face his mother.
“What’s happening ?”
She gave him a small smile.
“I love you, but you've got to stop behaving like this. One day people will get fed up by the way you act, and you'll have nobody. You've got to be nice to them, just like you used to.”
Tom loves his mother, he knows her heart was in the right place.
But, like he said before, he stopped being a good person long ago.
So he got frustrated, saying things he probably shouldn't have to a mom, and stormed off.
He went to the first bar he could find, flirted with the first girl he saw that looked like she wasn't here to meet the man of her life, and slept with her.
The next morning, he left before she could even wake up, and rode back to Los Angeles.
He hadn't spoken to his mother ever since.
Because she was completely wrong.
Tom has the money and the fame. No matter how much of an asshole he was, there's always going to be someone he could call.
He certainly wasn't going to stop because his stupid mother didn't want him to change, to evolve.
Well, that's what he had planned to do, until fate decided to take his parents' side.
Until fate brought a certain teacher in Tom's life.
They were filming a movie near San Francisco, and Tom really was grateful that the weather here was somewhat better than in Los Angeles.
He hates when it's too hot. It feels like he's genuinely melting, and he sweats so much he's always surprised he's not dying from dehydration.
Anyway, it was a boring day on set, most of the scenes were about stunts, so Tom really didn't have anything to do.
Which is why, when he saw a familiar blondie a few meters away, staring at another stuntguy jumping from…like, really high, Tom decided that a little fun couldn't hurt.
So he walked over to him, and wrapped his arm around the guy's shoulders.
The guy jumped (jumped, he swears), and let out a shriek that clearly doesn't belong to Seavers.
Also, it should not have sounded cute to Tom's ears.
Upon further observation, Tom concluded something.
“You're not Seavers.”
Yeah, definitely not Seavers. The guy doesn't wear shirts with some puns on them. At least, Tom doesn't think he does.
Also, he definitely doesn't have glasses.
The man shook his head, walking away from Tom's grip.
“No, no, I'm Ryland, Colt's twin.”
The guy- Ryland, yeah, lifted his hand as an attempt for a handshake, but Tom didn't take his hand. Instead stared at him intensely. Sizing him up, if he's being honest.
“I never knew he had a brother. Gotta say you're way more handsome than him. I'm Tom Ryder, by the way. Although you probably already know.”
After all, he's fucking famous.
Ryland ducked his head at the compliment, blushing slightly.
Oh, Tom was going to have a field day with this one.
“Yeah, I know. The screen definitely doesn't give you enough credit, though.”
Oh, now it was Tom's turn to blush.
Woah, why the hell was he so flustered ? A lot of people said that to him before.
There was something about that guy that entertained Tom so much that he didn't want to leave.
But, because life doesn't work like that, someone called for Tom to do a reshoot for a scene.
Turns out that day wasn't all about stunts, after all.
“May I ask for your number ? I promise you won't regret it,” Tom winked, fucking winked like the loser he is.
Ryland snorted, raising an eyebrow, and Tom never felt more insulted.
“No ?”
Fuck you mean ‘no’ ? People don't say no to Tom Ryder. They just don't.
He was about to say so when he saw Colt - the real, this time - approaching.
And that was Tom's cue to leave.
He has no doubt Colt would kill him if he could.
So he left quickly, throwing one last look at Ryland behind his shoulder, only to find him already looking.
He doesn't want to give his number ? Fine, Tom will get it eventually.
Like he said, nobody says no to Tom Ryder.
————————
He had found Ryland's number.
How ? You'll never know.
(He had absolutely not begged Ryland to give it to him when he had saw him again later that day)
Anyway, after he and Ryland had been texting for a month, Tom couldn't be happier.
He felt like the kid he used to be. Grinning whenever he received a text from Ryland, and kicking himself when the man flirted back (although it looked like Ryland didn't even know he was flirting, but Tom loved it).
He was aware that he looked like a teenage girl, and he was slightly ashamed by it.
But a text from Ryland quickly wiped out that shame.
One month turned into two, and they were now seeing each other face to face. It wasn't dates, per se, but it wasn't hangouts either, considering they spent their entire time flirting shamelessly (‘they’ meaning Tom).
Tom liked Ryland, like, really liked him. And watching him act when they were hanging out (okay, maybe they were dating, but Ryland never said so, it was all pretty confusing), he noticed how different they actually were.
Ryland never hesitated helping out strangers on the streets, or giving a huge tip when the waiter was particularly nice.
He never cut-off someone that was talking, he listened to people and asked genuine questions about them.
He never talked down on his students, always picking out something good about them, when they were feeling low.
Every time he walked into a room, people automatically liked him. That's just the way it is.
Truth is, Ryland is a good person.
He is everything Tom isn't.
And he feels bad whenever he thinks about it.
Tom felt bad whenever he saw Ryland giving him a look whenever he was acting like an asshole on set.
He felt bad when he thought of how different they were (like, come on, sure Tom is a fucking good catch, but Ryland probably deserves someone nicer).
Hell, he even felt bad when Seavers got mad at him for firing yet another assistant.
“You're a fucking asshole, Ryder,” Seavers had said, “That poor girl didn't even do anything wrong ! Stop being an entitled man-child for once in your goddam life !”
Entitled ? Man-child ? Tom was offended. He fired that girl just because she wasn't receptive to his flirting. That simply wasn't possible. Everyone's attracted to Tom. So, it seemed like a pretty good reason for firing her.
“She's a lesbian, Tom, of course she's not attracted to you”, a voice in his head (that suspiciously sounds like a certain teacher) provides.
His heart throbbed at that thought. Who is he if everyone doesn’t love him ?
Gah ! No. Whatever. Damn you Ryland Grace. Damn you for making Tom so conscious about his actions.
In an ideal world, Tom has never changed. He's still the type of person people genuinely want to hang out with.
And maybe then, people wouldn't be attracted to Tom just because of his looks.
There are no ideal worlds, Tom, come on. People change. You couldn't have stayed that little kid all your life anyway, even if you wanted to.
When they first kissed, in front of Ryland's front door in San Francisco, it was eye-opening.
He remembered what his mother had said: “One day people will get fed up by the way you act, and you'll have nobody”
He doesn't want that. Fuck no. Tom Ryder is a sociable man. ‘Alone’ isn't in his vocabulary.
Sweet and kind Ryland Grace would never stay with Tom Ryder the asshole. And that's the hard truth.
He certainly does not want Ryland to leave him. Absolutely not. Definitely not.
There was truly one way to prevent that from happening.
Starting by deleting all his previous flings’ numbers. He stopped making comments on set, he stopped bothering Colt (not completely, Tom still loved annoying him) and stopped telling the makeup artists they're bad at their jobs.
He also stopped flirting with people on set. It just didn't seem fair to Ryland.
He tried giving people a bit more credits for their actions. But it seemed so complicated. These people are morons, of course Tom's better than them. He can be a nice guy, but this is his limit.
Tom received weird glances from people at the changes in his behavior, but he couldn't care less.
What he cared about was seeing Ryland's soft smile when he heard about Tom's changes about himself.
Some people say that if you need to change for someone to like, then the entire relationship is rooted in toxicity.
Or some bullshit like that.
That might be true for them, but Tom doesn't care. He doesn't want to leave Ryland. He doesn't want Ryland to leave him. End of story.
And if he has to change for this to not happen. Then sure. Whatever. Tom's always played a role anyway.
Ever since he left his mother's house, and became the Tom Ryder from today, he’s been acting.
Well, at first. Then it just became normal to him.
So really, it's more of a coming back to who Tom used to be.
And, later, when his mother called him, he felt like crying. Well, maybe he did cry, but that isn't anybody's business.
“Tom, you are my pride and joy, and the last thing I want is to see you unhappy,” his mother had said.
“I am happy, mom. I've met someone. And I've thought about what you said. I don't want him to leave me, I don't.”
“You've met someone ? Oh my god ! Is this serious ? What's their name ? Ooh, I'm so excited to meet them !-”
Anyway, she was more interested to learn about Ryland than anything else.
Tom can't blame her, Ryland is really interesting.
He had come over to soothe things out with his mother, and instead spent all day talking about his beautiful boyfriend.
Guess that's the magic of mothers-
“What are you thinking about ?”
Tom flinches, pulled out of his thoughts.
He looks up at Ryland from where he's resting his head on the man's lap.
“What ?”
Ryland runs a hand through Tom's hair, gently pushing away his hair from his forehead.
“What are you thinking about ?,” he repeats.
“Stuff, don't worry about it”
Tom should consider writing a book, with all those monologues he's having with himself lately.
Ryland raises an eyebrow, but drops it. Because he's kind like that.
“Come here,” Tom reaches up to get Ryland to kiss him.
And he does, happily so.
Tom's really lucky to have him around.
Ryland chuckles, and huh ?
“You're more than lucky to have me.”
Oh, great, he said it out loud.
He finds that he doesn't really care, anyway.
Tom turns to his side, burying his face in Ryland's thigh. He's really comfortable, so a little nap wouldn't hurt.
Plus with Ryland softly petting him, sleep comes more easily than any favor he had to ask in his past.
If this is the kind of reward being a good guy (under certain circonstances) gives you, then Tom truly wonders why there are so many assholes around.
The first person who dares say that Tom is one of those assholes will get fired from their job and/or insulted through and through by him.
Ha, that's not a threat, of course not. After all, he's a nice guy now.