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If he hadn’t been so distracted, he probably would have seen this coming from a mile away, but there have been other things to focus on - like holidays, and filming and Jakey. Mostly Jakey, if he’s being completely honest, Jakey plagues his every waking thought which makes sense because he’s beautiful and perfect and fucking irritating, knows how to shift Heinz’s eyes to him every single time.
They’ve been getting closer lately, closer than they usually are, that is. After Jakey and Ellie broke up it’s been like the line in the sand has been stomped all over, Jakey had taken the first step over it and then Heinz had well and truly kicked his feet and blurred it. He’s liked Jakey for a while, much longer than he had any business doing, especially having just ended things with his own girlfriend, but he never imagined it would be something he’d get to act on.
He’s taken every fucking opportunity too now, though. It started small, like spending any free time he had in Jakey's room, no matter if he was streaming or not, just throwing himself on the bed and watching him work, or trailing around after him like a lost puppy during IRL segments - under the excuse of sharing an ingest, of course. He then kicked the sand a little further and they’d started doing romantic shit like movie nights in the cinema room multiple nights a week, and going on what are literally dates by everything but name when they have free time.
There’s smaller things too, like Saturday nights are still Jakey’s allocated night off and they used to be for Ellie, but now they are for Heinz. It had nearly knocked him off his feet the first time Jakey had poked his head round his doorway and asked where he wanted to go for dinner, and did he want to go to the cinema after because Jakey really wants to see that new film. He’d had to work to unstick his tongue from the roof of his mouth so he could say yes, please, anything you want, my perfect boy, do you want me to carry you there on my back or should we take my car?
He had actually said that, word for word. Jakey had just grinned, eyes crinkling the way they do when he’s really happy, and threw his head back to laugh.
Another thing is the physicality of it all. Now, Heinz has never been anything less than all over Jakey since the day they met, but now Jakey is doing the impossible and actually reciprocating it. He’ll flop down by Heinz on the sofa and lean into his side, he relaxes under an arm slung over his shoulders, he sinks back into Heinz’s chest when he wraps his arms around his waist from behind, he lets Heinz kiss his cheeks and nip at his nose and pinch his plush thighs. It’s uncharted territory for Heinz, but God is it exciting, he gets a dizzying rush of adrenaline and dopamine every time Jakey reaches out on his own accord, he’s sure this must be what it’s like to inject straight crack into his veins.
They share nearly every meal together, and drive to shoots together, and sometimes Jakey comes and climbs in bed with him after a long stream, and they’re steadily making their way through the house’s collection of old DVDs, and Jakey hums out ‘I love you’’s when hanging up the phone, and Heinz is carefully working on kissing him full on the lips instead of his pink cheeks — and they’re basically together.
All that’s left is to talk about it, properly, and put a real label on it, but Heinz is in no rush, things are perfect the way they are for now, and he’s happy to move at whatever pace Jakey is comfortable with because he knows they’re going to get there no matter how long it takes. He’s enjoying it, even, the slow and steady way they’re going at it, hitting silent milestones together and learning one another in a brand new way.
It’s truly perfect.
Except — the other lads are starting to cotton on to the change, and if Ginge keeps looking at him like he’s deflowering his precious daughter, he’s going to have to fucking move out.
He knows that they are going to start feeling the shift in dynamics, and they’ll worry naturally because there’s so many moving parts in their lives, and all of their careers are hinged on their friendship, all five of them. Heinz has spent sleepless nights turning it over in his head, and he knows Jakey has as well because at the start of everything, he’d made those first steps with bags under his eyes and bitten lips — but they’d both obviously come to the same conclusion in the end, that they could make it work, that they are probably made for each other like you see in Disney movies, proper soulmate shit.
He hopes the lads come to the same conclusions as they have, he thinks they will - Heinz has been a bit of a part timer in the past few months but he loves his job, and his friends, and the money too much to jeopardize it all, and literally nobody on the planet works harder than Jakey does for this group.
So, yes, he’d predicted the weird looks and the beats of silence during conversations and the cryptic text messages asking where the two of them had disappeared to on a Saturday night. It was all part of the parcel for this kind of thing, and Jakey was worth every single side eye around the kitchen table.
What he hadn’t predicted, is the sheer amount of death threats that were going to come with pursuing this.
He shouldn’t be, he likes to think he’s quite observant and should have seen it coming, but like he’s said, he’s been fucking distracted, which is why Tays takes him so off guard.
They’re in the car to a shoot, which is weird for two reasons; One being that it’s very early on a Saturday and not Wednesday like they normally film on, and two being that he’s not sat next to Jakey.
Nowadays, nine times out of ten he and Jakey will drive together - he tries to drive them both the most, poor thing having to be the one who shifted them around for months before they got their own cars, he’s Heinz’s passenger princess more often than not now. The only reason he’s not curled up there now is because he had to swing by and grab Bibby before the shoot, and the only reason Heinz chose to get in with Tays is because he’s a jealous man, especially over hunky cameramen and if he’d had to sit in silence for an hour with just his thoughts he probably would have drove into a tree.
He’s all out of wack, sat here with Tays, on a fucking Saturday. Saturdays are for streaming and date night, exclusively, stupid urgent brand deals fucking up his weekend. He loves Tays, loads and loads and loads, but he wants to be waking up Jakey with peppered kisses right now, not cramped up in his car listening to the 23rd MJ song in 45 minutes.
Bless him, Jakey is a creature of habit on his best days, he’d nearly popped a vessel when Ginge sent the text into the Bov thread. He likes his routine and he hates disappointing his viewers. Heinz had dug his fingers through his hair and scratched at his scalp until he’d stopped growling under his breath like a fat, spoiled house cat. Heinz adores him, he’s going to marry him one day.
“Can I speak to you about summat?” Taya interrupts his fantasies of Jakey in a dress - he’s thought about it often enough to know exactly what it would look like, Jakey would have to opt for an A-line fit to hug his curvy figure but not draw attention to his belly because he hates it— he’s getting distracted again.
“Yeah, mate, what’s up?” Heinz shakes his head, pulling himself together and reaching for his Redbull to take a swig, big up Angry Ginge.
“You and Jake…” He hesitates, “are yous actually together? Like proper?” His voice goes a bit weak towards the end of his question, glancing over at Heinz cautiously.
It makes him pause, cool can pressed to his bottom lip, he pulls it away to answer. “Uh— Why? Have you spoken to him?” He asks.
“No, no I haven’t. You aren’t then?” His eyes flick over, this time suspicious and assessing.
“Uh,” he stutters, fingers fidgeting with the tab on his Redbull. “We aren’t not together” he finally stutters out.
There’s a beat of heavy silence and then “what the fuck does that mean?” Tays gapes.
“Oh mate—“ Heinz groans, tipping his head back against the headrest.
“Come on, Bean. You either are or you aren’t, so what are you on about?” He rolls his eyes, “it defo looks like you are, from where i’m sitting”
“We are— or, we haven’t fucking had a chat about it but we basically are.” He bursts, throwing his hands out.
“Are we on fucking Love Island? Have you got to pull him for a chat, mate?” Tays spits, side eyeing him. “See, this is what I was worried about with you—“
“The fuck does that mean? Worried about?” Heinz hisses, turning bodily in his seat to stare him down. “I haven’t fucking done anything!”
“I mean, are you just messing him about or what?” He huffs.
“Messing him-? You fucking what?” Heinz gapes, he can hear his own blood pounding through his ears, and for a second he goes a bit dizzy with rage at the mere accusation that he’d ever mess Jakey around — if anyone’s being messed around, it’s fucking him, like a dog on a short lead, he is.
“Come on, Beano, mate, you know exactly what I mean. You’re not serious about anything, how can I expect you to be serious about him?”
Silence filled the car for a second, Heinz felt the air knock out of his lungs like Tays had just reached over and twatted him one. “I am serious about him.” He says levelled, he’s honestly shocked his voice didn’t shake.
Tays turns his head to look at him quickly, eyes flicking over his stony face and he nods, swallowing thickly as he moves to look back at the road. They're almost there now, and Heinz feels like the rug has been pulled out from under his feet.
“You know I proper love you, yeah?” Tays says, low.
“I know, mate.” He replies, quietly
“No, really, Bean.” He flicks his eyes over and they look big and blue and full of love, the way they have been these last few months living together.
“I know, Mikey” and he really does. Jakey may be the one half of his soul, the love of his life, and his best friend but Tays isn’t far behind. They’ve just gotten closer and closer since moving into the house, they’re similar in age and priorities and humour and it’s so easy to love Tays when he hands it out so openly.
“I love you mate, but Jake is…” He chews on his lip for a beat, flicking his indicator on. “Jake is Jake, Beano. He’s younger, and softer, and kinder than me and you. You get that, yeah?”
He does, he really fucking does. “Mikey, I know. I promise I do, I've had a thing for him since the start.” He sighs, relaxing into his seat and rubbing at his face tiredly. “He’s everything to me, Mikey, I’ve waited so long for this.”
They pull into the car park silently and Heinz’s eyes go straight to where the blue Jakeymobile Mark 2 is parked a few spaces away and… yeah, there he is - leaning against his bumper and scowling up at Bibby, sleepy and messy from the early hour, cozied up in an oversized blue zip-up that Heinz knows is from his wardrobe.
Jakey turns his head slightly at the sound of Tays’ car pulling in and meets his eyes easily, his face lights up and he stop arguing for a second to wave his fingers at him before Bibby must say something that sets him off again because he whips back around to call him a twat loud enough that they can hear it in the car.
He looks beautiful. He looks like Heinz’s.
Tays exhales heavily, grinning at him as he turns the car off. “I don’t even know what I was worried about, you’re obviously down bad as fuck” he snickers.
“Oi— yeah.” Heinz admits, eyes still trailing over Jakey’s side profile as he spits out what could possibly be slurs at poor Max.
“Look at me for a sec.” Tays hums, and when Heinz turns to look at him he’s expecting those same warm blue eyes, but instead they're hard as steel, he swallows thickly as he meets them. “You’re one of my best mates, yeah, but if you even think about upsetting Jakey, in any way, I'll knock your big ass head off your skinny shoulders.”
Heinz nods in understanding, he truly gets it - if their places were switched he thinks he might have already killed, disemboweled and melted Tays in a vat of acid.
“Good boy.” Tays grins, eyes brightening as he pulls his keys out of the ignition and moves to get out the car.
Heinz follows him happily, itching to be back by Jakey’s side. “Are you going to give him the same talk, then? Defend my honour?” He grins, playfully.
“Am I fuck.” Tays laughs, “you’ve got no honour to defend, mate.”
And Heinz would throw a strop about that but he’s suddenly within touching distance of Jakey and his brain goes like goo again as he wraps that warm little body in his arms with a soft coo. “g’morning, Jake, how was your drive in?”
“Oh— Don’t get me started, Beano. Bibby has been doing fucking cartwheels on my last fucking nerve.” Jakey grumbles, tucking himself deeper in the warm circle of Heinz’s embrace, rubbing his cold, pink nose into his shoulder and tucking his head under Heinz’s strong jaw.
The conversation with Tays settled over his skin easily, it sinks in and soothes whatever ache had been playing at his muscles without him realising. Knowing that someone outside of him and Jakey’s bubble can see what’s going on is oddly affirming, and knowing that Tays loves Jakey enough to make threats on his life is so adorable it nearly brings him to tears.
He should have fucking known it wouldn’t be one and done.
The shoot was fine, a run of the mill studio video where the only real work was swallowing down the urge to spin around and kick Ginge off his chair every time they caught him cheating - it was tempting enough that he blanked out for a good 40 seconds weighing up how worth it it would be to have the shit kicked out of him straight after, he quickly came to the conclusion that he didn’t want to be icing his nose in the cinema tonight, date night comes first.
It was Tays’ turn to host them with Jakey and Ginge on a team, and him and Chaz on the other, despite his many, many loud protests at being separated from his best friend. They get separated in different rooms at one point and it’s fine for the first five minutes with the camera on but there’s a brief battery change and it’s just him and Chaz for a few minutes.
He can feel the atmosphere in the room go very fucking weird, he glances over his shoulder at Chazza who’s not meeting his eyes and shifting on his feet.
“Y’alright, Chaz?” He hums, scanning him over - he looks nervous.
And before Chaz even opens his mouth, he knows exactly what’s coming, his spine straightens up and he turns to face his friend.
“You and Jakey are seeing each other, right?” Chaz looks up at him, pursing his lips.
“Did you fucking coordinate this?” Heinz whines, he looks to the ceiling - maybe he’s dreaming, maybe he’s actually tucked up against Jakey’s spine in bed right now and this isn’t actually happening again. There’s no way this hasn’t been set up by him and Tays, not on a sacred Saturday.
“What?” Chaz blinks, maybe not then, what are the fucking chances. “Listen—“
“Let me speed this up, okay?” He rushes but stands up straight and tall, shoulders pulling back as he looks Chaz head on seriously. “I’m serious about it, proper serious, like. I’ve been trying it on since the day we met and i’m not about to fuck it up, i swear on it. Ma’s life, Chaz, he’s my boy.”
There’s a pause and Chaz just blinks up at him, assessing him in a way that only comes with being older and wiser, whatever he sees on Heinz’s face is enough to reassure whatever he’s thinking because a big, bright grin breaks out on his face, his eyes and cheeks crinkling.
“Mate, I was just going to say to take it slow with him, it’s his first proper gay relationship” He laughs, and Heinz can feel his cheeks go pink, he rolls his eyes
“It’s mine too!” He scowls, hand coming up to rub at his jawline bashfully.
“You’ve been up to all sorts in your life, mate, this isn’t new to you” Chazza snickers, wiggling his eyebrows, before his face softens again and he smiles up at him, reaching out to tap him on the arm gently. “Seriously, though, I was a bit worried but I know you wouldn’t do anything to hurt him. You’re a good lad.”
Heinz smiles, warmth building in his chest. He loves his friends, and he loves how much they love Jakey.
“You know i’d ruin your life if you did, anyway” Chaz hums, meeting his eyes for one cold second before they go bright and warm again.
Never mind, then. They’re all fucking psychos, apparently. He gapes at Chazza’s relaxed figure, he’s already moved on to hitting a cheeky doomscroll. The door of the room opens as the cameramen come back in, and through the small gap he can see Jakey and Ginge across the studio — Ginge has got him in a headlock, grinning down at him as Jakey exaggerates his movements and pretends to die very, very loudly. His eyes are so fond, he can see that across the distance, and his laughter sounds like it’s punched out of him the way it always does when he’s with Jakey.
The door swings shut again, and he knows that before the day ends, he’ll be getting another bollocking.
It’s just gone three by the time they’re packing up and leaving the studio and energy is low, Tays is swaying on his feet, bless him, and he can see Chaz becoming one with the wall behind him, and he can feel Ginge staring daggers into the back of his head but none of that matters because Jakey had walked right over to him and tucked himself into Heinz open windbreaker and laid his head right over Heinz’s heart under the flimsy excuse of being cold.
He’s warm and soft against his body, and Heinz can’t help but rub his nose through the messy head of hair, inhaling the intoxicating way he smells after an early morning and a day of being bodily attacked by Ginge, he wraps the open zips off his coat tighter around them both. The crew are packing up around them and he knows it’s only a matter of time before this is ripped away from him, before—
“Are you still alright to give me a lift home, Jake?” Max wanders over, heaving a big bag up on his shoulder with way too much ease, sexy fucker. “You don’t need me again today, do you? It’s date night with the missus.”
Jakey sighs and tilts his head so he can look up at Bibby with one eye, “of course, my mate.” He hums, pulling out of Heinz’s grabby hold to dig around for his keys. “No, won’t need you again today, it’s date night for us too. Tomorrow, maybe, I'll let you know.”
Heinz feels his cheeks go red at the blatant acknowledgment of what was unspoken and Tays, the utter twat, makes a cooing sound behind him, harmonising with Chazza’s ‘awwww’ing somewhere to the left of him. Ginge’s silence sits like lead in his stomach.
“Oh fuck off, will you?” Jakey rolls his eyes and pulls his hood up, “See you at home, yeah? Think about where you wanna eat tonight, I never thought i’d say this but i’m sick of Nando’s” he glances at Heinz, looking sleepy and pouty but oh, so fucking gorgeous.
He nods absentmindedly, swallowing around the rock in his throat that makes him want to lie down at Jakey’s feet and cry until he agrees to stop leaving him, to let Heinz crawl into his skin and curl up by his heart, where he can stay close to the steady beat. Jakey wiggles his fingers, keys jingling as he and Bibby leave, calling out their goodbyes.
There’s a beat of heavy, weighted silence and all of sudden he feels like a prey animal, like a gazelle standing awkwardly in the middle of a pride of lions circling their next meal. He can feel all of their eyes burning into him like fucking lasers, Ginge is standing behind him, he feels his knees lock into place like he can feel the presence of the king, overpowering and genuinely fucking terrifying.
They must stand in that silence for a good minute, he can feel the damn sweat pooling at the nape of his neck, before Tays snorts and grabs him by the shoulder, shocking him into movement. He trips over his own feet as he’s pushed out the door but Tays’ hand is tight enough that he manages not to fall and eat shit.
By the time their back in the car colour has come back into his face and his legs are working again but he still feels jittery, like someone has electrocuted him and it’s still vibrating though his bones. He flops into the passenger seat with a heavy exhale.
Tays goes through the motions of turning the car on and pulling out of the carpark in easy silence, the radio kicks into gear and another fucking Michael Jackson tune comes floating from the speakers.
It’s Beat It. How fitting, he almost laughs out loud.
It fills the silence for a good minute before Tays starts laughing hard enough that he has to bring a shaky hand up to wipe tears off his cheeks as Heinz watches on in distant horror.
He glances sideways at him, eyes scrunched up with so much joy that they might as well be closed, and says “you are so fucked, my friend.”
Heinz just buries his face in his hands and whimpers.
By the time Ginge comes to execute him, he’s ready for it. He’s had a shit, shave and shower and he’s feeling fucking fresh, dripped out in his nicest jeans and button up so he looks extra lovely for his man — who’s also getting all prettied up for him on the other side of the wall.
He can hear Ginge banging around in his streaming room on the other side of him and he knows it’s coming, his murder, that is, so he sits down on the edge of the bed, clasps his hands together like he’s about to pray and waits.
He doesn’t have to wait long before Ginge opens his door and steps inside.
He feels his spine go rod straight as he watches Ginge lean back against the door, arms crossed and face blank, staring him down. He swallows thickly, blinking up at him and bracing himself.
He’s kind of known this was coming from day one, he didn’t expect Chaz and Tays to put their ten pence in but he’s just been waiting for Ginge to come and say something for weeks.
The relationship between Jakey and Ginge is weird. He’s seen them have full on brawls, knockdown fights and screaming matches and conversations so fucking passive aggressive and cold it makes his skin crawl sometimes. He’s also seen them soft and uncomfortably close, he’s walked in on Ginge holding Jakey to his chest in a warm hug on a bad day, and Jakey backs Ginge in every group argument they have, and if anyone outside of Bov even breathes in Jakey’s direction wrong Ginge is the first of them to be up and swinging.
It’s cute, if not kind of annoying. He can only compare it to a relationship actual siblings have, with the mood swings and the way they can smile at each other with blood and chunks of flesh in their teeth, and he thinks that’s what it is - brothers, in everything but blood.
He knows Jakey is loyal to Ginge, as much as he whinges about him, they have similar priorities, and if it came down to it, he’d follow Ginge anywhere - not out of greed, or security, but because he’s done a lot for Jakey and he’s already told Heinz he’s going to repay back that kindness for the rest of his life.
Ginge is similar, he loves them all and supports them all but Jakey matches his energy when it comes to work, and family, and relationships and he’s obviously the favourite six days out of seven.
So Heinz understands, and he’s been ready and waiting for this.
“Well?” Ginge says, levelled.
Heinz takes a big, deep breath and stands up, wiping his sweating palms on his jeans before squaring his shoulders and grabbing the red bull by the horns.
“I’m serious about him,” he starts, clearing his throat. “I’m so fucking serious about him, Morgan, I swear on it. He’s the love of my life, I think— I know.”
He takes another breath, eyes stuck on a spot on the door just above Ginge’s head. “And i’ve thought about it a lot and I know it’s risky but I fucking know we can make it work, me and Jake, I know this is it for me— and, god fucking forbid it’s not, then we’re both grown up enough to be normal adults about it, I promise.”
He stumbles over his words a little, and he risks a glance at Ginge who hasn’t shifted a single muscle yet, and steels himself to keep going. “I really, really love him, Morgan. I do, more than anything, I’ve been waiting for so long for this, I’m not going to do anything to fuck it up. I know I'm a flirt, and I'm unreliable, and I like a holiday but Jakey is my top priority, he has been from the start, even when he shouldn’t have been, and he will be until the end.”
He’s heaving when it’s over and he feels a bit like he’s going to throw up and he can’t look Ginge in the eye. He feels a bit like he’s standing in limbo, teetering on a ledge between life and death.
Ginge keeps him swaying there for what feels like fucking years, long enough for whatever shit Drake song Jakey is playing to switch to another shitty Drake song. He holds his breath until—
“You know I love you, Ryan.” Ginge speaks, “I love you enough to let you live in my home and enough to keep believing in you even though you’ve taken four holidays since January but it’s Jakey, and if you fuck this up i’ll have you out of here so fast your head will fucking spin. You can swear on that.”
He started nodding as soon as Ginge opened his mouth and he hasn’t stopped and his neck hurts but he’s just so grateful no one has taken a swing at him today. “I know, I know— I promise, I won’t fuck this up.”
“Right, glad we’re on the same page, mate” Ginge nods, pushes off the door and walks out. He stops to glance in Jakey’s doorway for a second, his face goes gentle for a special split moment before he calls him a fat cunt and walks off. Jakey’s giggles float through the door and everything is perfect again.
Jakey peaks his lovely face around the doorframe just as he starts to regain feeling in his fingers and toes, smiling bright. “Ready to go? Have you figured out where to eat? I’m fucking starving, mate.”
“I’m coming, baby, I'm coming.”