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The people of the town say Tommy worships a fake God. Tommy says that those people are just embarrassed their God doesn't love them as much.
Sure, maybe no one else has heard of Tommy's God. And maybe he can't find any record of them by name or any rituals of worship for him to copy. It doesn't matter. Tommy's God is the best there is.
The Blood God is certainly a different choice of God, he will admit. The whole god of slaughter thing doesn't appeal to most people. Tommy didn't even know who he was building an alter for when he started, he just knew he had to build one.
Everything changed when he finished the altar. When The Blood God first spoke to him.
The voice that echoed through his head was rough, but it was powerful. An altar. How nice. The Blood God accepts your offering, little Worshipper.
He woke up a couple hours later laying in front of the altar. He was half convinced the whole thing was a dream because Gods don't talk to people. Occasionally, rarely, a God might perform a miracle or two, but he had never even heard of a God that talked to their worshippers.
He might have put the whole thing out of his mind until he pulled himself up and saw the stone table. Right in the center was a carving of a boars skull, so smooth he knew it wasn't done by human hands. There was no chance that The Blood God hadn't spoken to him after that.
Now this may come as a surprise but Tommy was never big on worship as a child. Sure he went to temples with his parents to make offerings, and he participated in a couple rituals to common gods for good health and wealth and all that stuff. But he was never planning on becoming a Worshipper, someone who primarily and loyally worshipped one God. So it could be said that Tommy had no idea what to do.
The next day he was in the local bookstore as soon as it opened, going straight to the front desk. "Good morning," he said, "do you happen to have any books regarding The Blood God?"
"The Blood God?" The lady asked sceptically, "Is that some new title the kids are using? Are you looking for Ares? Kartikeya? Enyo even?"
"No, I'm pretty confident he was called The Blood God."
"Well I don't know where you're hearing this kid, but I think that person may have knocked their head. I consider myself an expert on the Gods you know and there is no God that goes by that name."
Tommy resisted the urge to stomp his feet. "The Blood God spoke to me, I'm trying to figure out what to do now!"
The lady looked at him with pity in her eyes. "Look, I think you might have had a bit too much to drink last night. You're welcome to check out what we have here, but if I were you I'd go home and sleep it off. I won't tell anyone if that's what you're worried about."
This was not a drunken ramble. He stormed to the back of the store just to get away from her. If no one else knew The Blood God then that just meant he was special. He wandered the shelves until he found a book titled The Basics of Prayers, Rituals, and Offerings. He would just create his own ways to worship.
With a new plan in mind he marched up to the front desk and dropped the book on the counter. He ignored the pitiful look as he paid and walked out. He sat on a nearby bench and flipped open to a random page.
Offerings
One of the best ways to appease a God is through offerings. Typically these offerings are burned so that they may appear in the god's domain, but some gods are known to prefer offerings left out or thrown in water. Offerings, similar to prayers, are more powerful when done on an altar, but can be done anywhere if an altar is unavailable.
Offerings of food are the most common and simplest type of offering. It must be your own food, otherwise it may be interpreted as a slight against your chosen god. Other common offerings include items connected to the God's domain (for example, a worshipper of Pan may leave braided wildgrass at the Altar overnight).
Huh. Okay food was easy, he just needed to make a fire near his altar. He did remember the front of temples normally had a large fire next to the altars. He was a little more concerned about the things connected to the domain. Was that just blood?
So he did what any slightly confused worshipper would do and went to ask The Blood God. He set a large bowl on top of the altar and made a fire inside, tossing some of the leftovers from his lunch into the flames.
"Hey Blood God? What exactly are you the God of?" he asked the altar. He stood there in silence for a minute, starting to think that talking may have been a one time thing, when it echoed through his head.
I am the God of Slaughter, of Survival, and of the Arctic.
He could feel the god's presence in his head this time, along with a sharp cold in his bones. Not enough to hurt, but enough to feel on edge. There was the sharp scent of blood in the air, mixed with what he thought were pine trees? He didn't live around any pine trees to know.
Well that answered his question, but did not fix the whole offering thing. "That's nice. What do you want me to offer up then? Survival is kind of metaphorical and I don't have anything arctic around here."
You are still awake this time, rude, I like the food, any blood if you can get your hands on it, and I enjoy history books.
¨History books? Really? Weren't you there for like, all of history?"
You are a bold one aren't you? The history books are a personal interest, feel free to disregard if you want to.
"No I'll do it, I'm just saying it's a little weird." He didn't know Gods could have hobbies.
Anything else you need from me, Little Worshipper?
This is when he remembered he was actually talking to a God and his head started to feel light. "No, I'm good. Thanks?"
I am glad you came to me, Little Worshipper.
He went back to the bookstore the next day and bought the longest history book he could find.
Surprisingly, The Blood God continued to talk to him. At first, it was just when Tommy was at his altar. Tommy would explain the things he was offering or talk about his day and The Blood God would tell him what he was doing wrong and ask him about his friends and family.
Then The Blood God started speaking to him inside his house. He would pop into Tommy's brain to ask if he was going to offer any of his dinner, and critique his seasoning.
It only took a couple months before it didn't matter where he was, The Blood God would speak into his mind. He learned that the god did really like blood, but also dogs, books, and fancy things. The god seemed disappointed to learn that Tommy did not have enough money to buy anything gold, even if a trader carried it passed through. When Tommy asked why he wanted it considering he was a God and capable of making it himself Tommy would think, The Blood God said it was 'about the principle, Little Worshipper'.
The Blood God had become a constant in his life, so suffice to say he was not happy to learn that the god would be absent for a couple months.
"What do you mean you'll be gone? You're a God. Where are you even going?" Tommy asked his empty kitchen, waving around the knife he was just using to cut fruit.
I have things to take care of. These things require more power than I can spare to talk to you.
"Do these things involve lots of blood?" Tommy asked asked sceptically. "Nevermind not the point. How long are you going to be gone for?"
I am the Blood God, what do you think it would involve? And are you going to miss me?
His God was teasing him. If someone had asked him a year ago if he would be standing in his kitchen being made fun of by a God Tommy would have laughed in their face, yet here he was. "So what if I will. You're almost cool, for a God and all."
Don't worry Little Worshipper, I won't be gone long. I would like it if you continued your offering while I'm gone though.
"Some shity other worshippers you got Blood God if they stop just cause you go on a little murder trip once in a while," Tommy muttered, going back to cutting up his fruit.
The Blood God laughed in his head. You'll see me soon enough.
With that cryptic as hell statement Tommy felt the presence recede from his head. He would not miss his God.
He missed the Blood God. Which was ridiculous because his God had gone days without talking to him before, so the measly twenty-four hours it had been was barely anything. It was just this time he knew it would be weeks before he got to talk to him again.
He gave himself a mission for while he was gone though. There were no prayers he could find for The Blood God, so he needed to make some himself. He had been putting this off in fear that the Blood God would show up in his head mid-way through and tell him that the prayers were horrible. But because he couldn't speak to Tommy for a while, he had opened his book to the prayers section that morning.
Prayers
Praying is one of the most basic expressions of faith for a worshipper. They can be simple prayers of thankfulness for a god's presence in one's life, or more complex prayers to request intervention from a god. Prayers are often considered more powerful when using repetition or a rhyme scheme.
There are a few general prayers used by people who don't worship any particular god, but it is highly recommended that one looks up and memorizes the prayers associated with their God before improvising them. Improvised prayers are traditionally only done by the highest temple worshippers during specific rituals.
That had a few pieces of advice, but did not go into detail about how to make up a prayer. Technically, he could be considered the highest worshipper of his temple if he thought about it. If 'highest worshipper' meant 'only worshipper' and 'temple' meant 'altar in his backyard'.
All of that led to him standing outside of one of the largest temples in town. He almost considered it weird that the Goddess of Death had so many followers, but he probably couldn't say anything about that considering his God was the God of Slaughter.
But they had regular prayer sessions that, apparently, had a lot of different kinds of prayers. He wasn't going to copy them, per say, but there couldn't be anything wrong with taking a little bit of inspiration. Besides, their God had to be friends with his God, right?
He was admiring the temple, which was made entirely out of obsidian with dramatic double doors in front when someone started talking next to him.
"It's-" they started coughing, "Sorry, it's a gorgeous temple, isn't it?"
Tommy turned to find one of the strangest men he had ever seen. His hair was completely pink and braided down to his waist. Attached to his belt was a large battle axe, and he looked simultaneously Tommy's age and like he had lived six lives through. "Uh, yeah. It's one of my favorites."
"Are you a worshipper?" The man asked, glancing down at Tommy's outfit.
"No?" Why- he looked down at his clothes. Maybe that wasn't the best day to wear an all-black outfit. "Nah, I've got my own God. Just admiring it."
"Oh," the stranger looked curious, "Who do you worship?"
Now, would he probably get laughed off? Yes. But this guy was very clearly not from there, so there was a chance that he had information on his God. "The Blood God."
The stranger hummed, "Haven't heard of him… what's he the god of?"
The little hope he had for information was snuffed out, but the stranger didn't scoff at the idea of his God, so that made him more interested in the conversation. "He's the God of Slaughter, Survival, The Arctic, and I think history books but he says that's a personal interest," Tommy said excitedly.
The strangers eyebrows went up. "Your God talks to you?" The look on their face was surprised, but their voice was still deadpan.
"Yeah," Tommy shrugged. "I don't know why that's such a big deal. He's not even that cool. Keeps critiquing my cooking and cleaning skills."
"Does he have a temple around here?" The stranger looked around, "I would like to see it."
"Ah," Tommy rubbed the back of his neck. "I have an altar at my house? But I seem to be the only worshipper around."
"Can I see?"
The idea of someone being interested in his God far out-shadowed the dangers of showing random strangers with battle axes where his house was. He instantly abandoned the idea of going in the temple. "Sure!" he said, "It's a little bit of a walk though."
"Not a problem," the stranger responded. "My name is Technoblade by the way." Not that Tommy was going to say anything about it but that was a weird name. Not like, suspicious weird, just strange. Not his fault his parents were weird though.
"I'm Tommy, it's nice to meet you." He started down the street in the direction of his house after belatedly noticing they had been standing in the middle of traffic to talk. "What are you in town for?" He would definitely have noticed a man with pink hair in town before, no matter how much time he spent in his house.
"Just passing through," Technoblade said, "I have some business around to do and I thought this looked good enough."
He took the left turn into the forest that would lead to his house. "Nice, nice." They fell into silence as they walked down the path. He hadn't considered how his altar being literally behind his house would work if other people wanted to use it. Can anyone just make their own altar at their house? His parents were pretty devout worshippers and he couldn't remember having an altar in his house as he grew up. Was is in the basement they never used?
That was definitely something to ask Blood God when he got back. Until then: "Do you have a god?" He suddenly asked Technoblade.
Out of everything Tommy had said this seemed to surprise Technoblade the most. He watched the man trip over a root, stop himself, and then stare at Tommy for a good minute before he said, "Uh… no. I'm not, like a big fan of Gods?"
He had never met a person who just didn't like the gods. Hated some of them yes, but never an overarching indifference. "Ah, that sucks man," he said, "My God, not that I'd ever tell him this because really being a literal god is good enough for the ego, is like the best. I never would have thought feeling someone inside my brain would be comforting but it really is. It makes me feel less alone. And also a little more inclined for blood sometimes but I think that just comes with the trade."
That was supposed to bring the topic back over to him so Technoblade could see how awesome his God was, but it seemed to have the opposite effect. Technoblade had a look of mild horror on his face. Was it the blood? He would not have guessed the man with the battle axe would be squeamish. He racked his brains for a better topic. "Do you… read books?" That was about the most opposite to violent things right?
Technoblade took the topic change with nothing more than a blink. "I pick up a history book sometimes."
"Just like The Blood God! I think I have a few history books you can look at that I haven't offered to him yet. I keep like a little stockpile."
"That's crazy," this was again, delivered with a completely straight face, "I can't believe it."
"I know!" Thankfully for the weird conversation they finally arrived at Tommy's little cabin. He led the way inside, and silently wondered if his whole house was just a temple now. The bloodied pine forest, as he had taken to calling it, smell lingered, and it seemed to be slightly cold no matter what he did. Though he wasn't sure if the second one was actually his house or was just him.
They went out the back door where his altar was, and Tommy rekindled the fire while Technoblade inspected the boar skull engraving. "Did you know that was how I knew the whole thing wasn't a hallucination?" Tommy commented.
"What was?" Technoblade asked, running his hands over the stone.
"The first time The Blood God talked to me I passed out, and woke up on the ground where you're standing. I thought the whole thing was a fit of delusion until I saw the carving."
"You thought a God talking to you was a hallucination?" Techno laughed, "Tommy, I don't think there's anyone like you."
"Of course not. I'm amazing. Much better than you other pathetic people."
Techno continued to laugh at him and wandered to the side to inspect the rest of the backyard. He had started to clear the area surrounding the altar because he felt like the least he could do for his homemade altar was make sure that it was clean and not likely to get smashed by a falling tree branch.
While he explored Tommy thought he'd offer up some fruit he had snagged from the kitchen on his way through and try out this whole praying thing. Hey Blood God? he said in his head, ignoring the sound of Technoblade tripping over something again, Thanks for being cool I guess? And Thanks for not demanding blood all the time because I really don't want to have to lug a deer all the way out here to drain it and I don't know how to do that. You're not allowed to bully me for this when you come back I'm trying my best. Nothing happened physically but there was a new weight that settled on him. Like his bones were stronger than they were before, less fragile. Which was weird because he didn't think his bones were that fragile until they weren't anymore.
Technoblade came over and eventually stood next to him while he was comprehending the change to his skeleton. He would need to ask The Blood God if this was just a mental thing or literally his bones were harder to break. Or if he got hit with a hammer over the next month he could figure it out himself.
He shook himself out of it and turned to Technoblade. "So this is the place. Do you want to stay for lunch?"
"Sure," Technoblade bounced on his toes, "I'd love to stay for lunch."
Tommy was pretty sure him and Technoblade were friends now. The other man would pop over to his house at random hours to talk and watch him make offerings. He suspected Technoblade had a complicated relationship with religion because he said he didn't like the Gods but was always in a better mood after watching Tommy make an offering.
He didn't know what Technoblade did during the day when he wasn't stealing all of Tommy's books. He never saw him in town, even when he stopped into the only inn to try and spot him. Technoblade simply laughed and avoided the question every time he tried to ask.
Anyway, he was reasonably confident that made them friends. Which made Technoblade the only person who could be pounding on his door in the middle of the night.
"This better be fucking serious," he grumbled as he dragged himself to the door and released the deadbolt, "Somebody better be dead."
He swung the door open to reveal Technoblade hunched over on his doorstep, hair a mess, and a concerning red shirt that he knew was supposed to be white. "Techo- what happened? Are you okay? Do you need-"
Technoblade cut him off by shouldering his way into the house. "What took you so long."
"Why are you bleeding! Why are you bleeding in my house at two in the morning!"
Technoblade collapsed onto his couch and Tommy had the idle thought that that would be really hard to clean in the morning. "Tommy-"
Tommy jolted into motion, "Wait I need to get bandages, I need to get water-"
"Tommy-"
"I'm supposed to disinfect, how the fuck do I disinfect-"
"Tommy!" Techno yelled. "This is really weird but I need you to stop freaking out and pray. Maybe offer something you can make a fire really quick."
"This is no time for praying! The Blood God's on vacation or something and I don't even know if he can heal, much less if he would!" Shit- did he even have bandages? Where would Tommy two years ago when he moved in have put the bandages.
"Tommy!" Technoblade snapped with a hand pressed to his side, "Please, for the love of -, just pray."
And despite how stupid and awful of an idea it sounded like when Technoblade was bleeding out on his couch– he did.
Please Blood God, please help my friend. He's kinda bleeding out and I know you're like the God of blood and slaughter but if you could like… unslaughter him? I think you'll really like him when you get back. If that's not in your powers can you hit up a friend who can heal? Please I promise I'll offer you all the books I've been storing in my living room that you definitely know about but still its the thought that matters right and —
Technoblade was glowing. Was this a normal part of healing? He had never seen a miracle happen before. Well technically the altar thing could be classified as a miracle but he was unconscious so it wouldn't count anyway.
— really he's so cool you two would get along and I let him read your history books and he seems to like them even though he tells me they're stupid.
You can stop now the Blood God said in his head.
"You can stop now," Technoblade said.
Tommy collapsed in a chair, the energy drained out of him.
Thank you Tommy
"Thank you Tommy"
"Stop doing that it's creepy," he grumbled, shoving his face into a pillow. Wait. He lifted his head back up. "How the fuck are you doing that?"
You know how I said I had stuff to get done?
"You know how I said I had stuff to get done?"
Tommy stared at Technoblade, his friend who had just been bleeding out on his couch. "Absolutely not. You have pink hair! What God has pink hair!"
Technoblade touched a hand to his hair, which was cut haphazardly short on one side now that he looked closer. "You don't like it? Niki thought it was cool."
"That's not the point!" Tommy threw his hands up. "The point is that you were in my house! You ate my food! You read my books!"
"You have an altar to me in your backyard, you were going to offer that food up anyway, and you haven't read a word of those books yourself." He ticked off each of the points on his fingers.
"It's the principle of the thing! You could have told me when you were leaving: Hey, might run into you in human form while you're out, just a heads up!"
"I didn't plan to come here," Technoblade said sheepishly, "And by the time I decided to stick around it was too awkward."
"Too awkward," Tommy repeated. He stared at Technoblade blankly. "You are a God. You are a literal primordial being. And it was 'too awkward'?"
Technoblade shrugged. "I don't have a lot of believers. Don't do a lot of socializing to be honest."
Tommy buried his head back in the pillow. "You are the absolute worst."
"Love you too Tommy."