Chapter Text
Kochou Shinobu silently walked into a nervous, stuffy room.
This room was a ward of the Butterfly Mansion, in which four Hashira had been anxiously waiting in their beds. They all looked exhausted. Giyuu was slouching, hair messy, and along with his comfortable white clothing, he had bandages wrapped around his forehead and thigh. Obanai had even darker-than-normal circles under his eyes and sat with his blanket over his head. His torso was similarly covered in bandages. Tengen and Kyoujurou, who were sitting in the same bed (as requested by Tengen), both had plaster all over their faces, as they had a few cuts here and there. And when Shinobu walked in, they hugged each other—evidently preparing for the worst.
Shinobu entered with a clipboard, a pen, and a look on her face that spelled utter bad news. The clipboard was filled with documents, and on top was her notepad, which would worry the four men if they could see all the scribbles on it. She sighed.
"So . . is it bad?" asked Tengen, his voice rising in pitch pitifully and dramatically.
"Well, you guys will live," she began. "but this Blood Demon Art's not fun. I've figured out its effects, so let me tell you the situation."
Then, she pulled a chair and sat down in front of everyone's beds.
"Alright. It is a poison, as we've seen many times before, but it's a very peculiar one. Let's start with the bad news," Tengen shuddered like there was a ghost, and Kyoujurou gulped, but was clearly trying to be strong as he kept a stern face.
Truthfully, they were mostly being dramatic, and Shinobu was definitely playing along, because what Hashira hasn't dealt with an extremely dangerous Blood Demon Art multiple times before? Tengen and Kyoujurou were, in their own slightly messed up way, just trying to have a little bit of fun, and Shinobu joined in. Though, the poison was still definitely a concern, so Shinobu continued explaining.
"The poison you've been injected with will gradually drain your life force, and eventually kill you, if nothing is done for a certain amount of time, which is usually two weeks. Over this time, you will feel increasingly exhausted and your power will be sapped away until there's none left, resulting in your painful death." Everyone listened intently.
"But now, the slightly-better-news! The effects of this poison can be reset with a certain cure, which makes the toxins restart the process of killing you. This will give your body time to break down the poison and naturally recover, which should take around two weeks as well, if you receive the cure every day. So there’s no one instant-fix, but a gradual one. Make sense?" She smiled. The boys nodded in sync, slowly, as their brains were being overloaded with information.
Then, she added:
"Though . . There is one more hindrance. The cure is very . . particular."
"Okay, give it to us. What is it?" asked Obanai.
"I did not believe it, but it was tested. The infected can reset the poison in this way if they receive a kiss, specifically a kiss from an uninfected individual of the same-sex." Her speech slowed at the last few words, emphasizing them.
Justifiably so, the boys stared at her dumbfounded, with wide eyes. At this moment they somehow looked more disheveled than before. Shinobu had to hold back her laughter as she knew it would be extremely inappropriate.
". . So, you will all need to choose who will be your cure over this time."
". . Wow. Okay. I don't know what I was expecting but it wasn't that!" Tengen's lips curled into an awkward smile.
"Well alrighty! I suppose the demon did seem very . . enthusiastic? He was reciting love poems and songs during our fight! Did you experience the same thing, Kochou?" Kyoujurou added.
"Yes, my encounter with him was like that as well. I'm only glad all of you encountered some of its clones and were able to take it down together, but it is unfortunate that you were all poisoned."
The demon was a pesky Upper Moon, and many of the Hashira encountered it before, but were unable to fully defeat it due to its ability to clone itself in great numbers. This was until Obanai and Giyuu were sent together on a scouting mission where they met some of the clones, as well as Tengen and Kyoujurou who were nearby. This lucky meeting allowed the four to work together to slay the monster, yet at a large cost. That all took place the night before this conversation.
"Thankfully, we can all stay in commission through the cure." Giyuu mentioned.
"Oh right, the cure . ." Tengen groaned. Giyuu reminded everyone of the especially importunate situation that they had to figure out regarding their antidote.
"Tch. We should have known. The demon used a heart-shaped bow-and-arrow, for crying out loud." Obanai snarled.
"Let's discuss, now. Do any of you have any . . very-close-male-friends who might do you a life-saving favor?"
Shinobu got down to business. The men all shared looks at each other. Obanai's bed was in the middle, so he looked both ways, but when he made eye contact with Giyuu, he growled at him for no reason. Then, Tengen broke the silence to get the discussion going.
"Okay, I propose something! We should all choose the same guy that we all know so we don't complicate things."
"He should be a Hashira too." Obanai added.
"Well, we're getting somewhere!" Shinobu smiled awkwardly. "Remember, you all, this is someone you'll have to be kissing every day for two weeks or more, assuming they agree to the ordeal. They should agree, though, as this is dire."
"But now that leaves us with three options!" Kyoujurou shouted, leading to Tengen gently pushing the loud man's face a little farther away.
"Obviously not Muichirou." Giyuu added. The boy was like a son to him.
"Two, now!" Obanai would've glared at Kyoujurou for being loud if he wasn't painfully used to it.
Then, Tengen announced eagerly.
"Himejima? I'd be perfectly fine with that! Seriously, I would let him replace me as the man in my marriages. I could be a wonderful wife."
"Hell no. I am not kissing Himejima."
"Apologies, Tengen! I must agree with Obanai, for Himejima is too intimidating!" Tengen pouted. But then, everyone started to realize who their final option was.
"There's Shinazugawa." Giyuu muttered.
Everyone was silent for a few seconds. Shinobu kept her friendly smile, watching intently.
Giyuu then felt the need to respond to Shinobu's previous question: ". . Oh, and Kochou, I don't think I even know any men other than the Hashira, let alone close male friends."
"Ah, don't worry Tomioka, we know."
"I don't think I know any men that I would trust more with my wonderful mouth than the Hashira! So even if I do have close friends, it must be one of my greatest comrades."
"I agree with Kyoujurou, although I don't think I would trust any man with my mouth." Obanai glared at Kyoujurou.
"Kyou, would you trust me with your wonderful mouth?" Tengen suddenly blurted out.
"Of course! If only you didn’t have the poison as well!"
"Okay, anyway, the man of your choice being a Hashira makes things easier, as we can get Master Ubuyashiki to shift his mission schedules around giving you guys your daily kisses, so that's good. But you need to decide who." Shinobu attempted to speed things up.
"How about I give you guys a moment to finish up your discussions? I'd like to go speak with the younger slayers for a bit, so you can call me back when you've decided!" She sweetly offered, clasping her palms together.
"Alright. We'll be quick." Obanai nodded.
"Yup! In a flash!" said Tengen.
"Good. I'll check up on your conditions after!" Shinobu hummed as she took her leave. The boys were now left alone.
Shinobu thanked the heavens above as she left, for none of the boys questioned the fact that she said her theory for the cure was 'tested'.
". . Okay. What's everyone's opinion on choosing Shinazugawa?" After Shinobu left, Obanai started. Then, he looked at Tengen, who began giving his opinion.
"Well, I have serious doubts that he's ever kissed anyone before, so he will probably be an utterly unflashy kisser. But who knows, maybe he'll shock us! So I'm willing to see!" Tengen then turned to Kyoujurou. "How do you feel?"
"About kissing Shinazugawa? Hm, I guess I've always wanted to try!"
". . Really." Tengen raised a brow. "Okay, Iguro, you should give us your opinion."
Obanai lowered his head and hugged his blanket a little tighter, so that it covered him more.
"He's much better than our other options . . At least I'm a bit close with him, I guess." His stomach felt weird. He stared at his lap rather than making eye contact with Tengen.
But then, he looked up to his right, at Giyuu.
". . . Tomioka, how do you feel about it? It’s your turn."
Giyuu's eyes widened a little at Obanai's request, and he awkwardly stared at him. If Obanai didn’t speak with such a venomous tone, what he said would have sounded caring, so that confused Giyuu. But then he stared at his hands in his lap so that he could think.
"I would be gravely indebted were he to help."
"Boring! Unflashy! What about the kissing part? How do you feel about kissing Shinazugawa?"
"Yes, indeed! I think it is a worthy discussion!" Kyoujurou fanned the flames.
"Hey, guys, to make the decision, how about we all try to imagine kissing Shinazugawa!? Alright, close your eyes! Start in three, two . ." Without allowing anyone any time to approve or refuse, Tengen then straightened his back and closed his eyes, followed by Kyoujurou. Obanai scoffed but closed his eyes too. Giyuu couldn't tell if Tengen was being serious, but he didn't want to miss out, and he felt like it could actually be a little useful. So he closed his eyes as well.
Everyone sat in silence. It was an extremely odd sight.
Obanai was actually pretty good at picturing things vividly, so he immediately got bashful. He saw a scarred yet comforting face enter his imaginary view, and it felt way too real. As he imagined a warm hand cupping his cheek, he instinctively pursed his lips.
Kyoujurou suddenly started imagining a much more . . heated scenario. It was truly not his intention, but his mind started creating a scene of him laying on the ground with Shinazugawa above him, like they just finished sparring with Kyoujurou as the loser. And Shinazugawa was smiling. Kyoujurou became tense and closed his eyes more tightly.
Tengen was struggling with imagining a flashy enough scenario. So, after a few impatient seconds, he peeked at Kyoujurou.
"Hey, Kyou, you're blushing!" Then, he opened both eyes and whipped his head over to Obanai. He gasped dramatically. "Obanai, you too!"
Obanai winced at the use of his first name. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" He barely raised his pitch at the end of the sentence, making it sound more like a statement than a question.
"I propose that we should start calling each other by our first names! I think this experience is embarrassing enough to bring us much closer to each other, right?" Obanai hissed at him.
". . This is too much." Giyuu turned his head away from everyone else. He truly could not last very long with extroverts.
"I was not blushing, Tengen, you dimwit." Obanai then retaliated, as if he only now processed what Tengen said. He wasn't good with extroverts either, but he was definitely capable of throwing insults at them.
"Yes, neither was I!" Kyoujurou puffed out his chest proudly.
"No, Kyoujurou, sorry, you can't say the same. Your face is the same color as the tips of your hair." Obanai sounded genuinely apologetic, as he realized that it must be hard for your body to show your emotions so well. He felt the same sympathy for Kanroji.
Tengen looked at Kyoujurou, whose face was indeed as red as Obanai described. He laughed.
"Alright, well, I think that settles it. I think Sanemi's gotta be our best choice! Do we all agree?"
Still feeling a little bit embarrassed, Kyoujurou silently nodded. Giyuu nodded as well.
". . Yeah." Obanai sighed. This was a truly strange ordeal.
"Ah, I am suddenly extremely tired . ." Kyoujurou leaned back, looking down as his eyelids felt heavy.
"Shit, now that you say, me too." Tengen rested his back on the stack of pillows behind him and wrapped his arm around Kyoujurou.
"God, I feel sore all over." Obanai suddenly laid down on his side and curled up, with his blanket at chin-level.
"We need someone to tell Kochou our decision," Kyoujurou slightly mumbled.
"I'll do it." Giyuu then got up to find her. He wasn't feeling too horrible yet, compared to the others. Tengen thanked him as he left, and Obanai mumbled a 'yeah'.
While the boys were conversing, Shinobu went and found Mitsuri with Tanjirou's group in the garden, and she spent the whole time telling everyone the situation.
Mitsuri already knew of the poison, but this was the first time she was told about the four men also being affected by it. Tanjirou, Zenitsu, Inosuke, Nezuko, Genya, and Kanao didn't really know how to feel, though—because even though the Blood Demon Art was life-threatening, Shinobu was laughing the whole time she told the story. So everyone ended up staring at her kind of baffled.
"So they have to choose someone to help . . kiss them for two weeks? That’s rough . . What kind of demon . . " Tanjirou scratched his head.
"Yes, and do you know who they're choosing between right now?" Everyone begged her to tell them. Shinobu covered her mouth modestly as she shook with giggles.
"Gyomei and Sanemi . . !"
Then, suddenly, Giyuu slid open the door to the garden, and stood still. Shinobu reacted quickly and turned around.
"We're ready . ." he announced. Everyone in the group was trying to be silent because they felt really bad about the circumstances. Shinobu bit her lip to make herself stop smiling as she got up.
"Alright, let's go back," she glanced at Mitsuri as she walked, like two children trying not to laugh during a serious situation. They almost failed. Both of them smiled, but Tanjirou and Nezuko helped cover Mitsuri's mouth, and Shinobu was of course too good at withholding her facial expressions.
As soon as Shinobu left, everyone in the group definitely felt embarrassed, but started guessing who the four boys were going to choose. Even though nobody was around, they whispered shyly.
A few moments later, Shinobu and Giyuu arrived at the room.
"You guys don't look so great." She grimaced. Everyone was in a pitiful sight.
Though, the one who looked most uncomfortable was Obanai, and Shinobu took note of this. Well, he didn't look uncomfortable, rather . . . inhibited. His face was already slightly colored, although not in a normal red color like most people. He was pink, almost purple like a bruise even. This amused her, because he was already blushing and flustered just having to think about the man he's gonna have to kiss. The others definitely looked a little sheepish, but it showed on Obanai the most.
"Yeah, well, we've picked out our man." Tengen managed to smirk although he appeared pretty worn out. "Deliver us Sanemi, will you?"
Shinobu smiled and tilted her head. "He will be informed. But first let me run some tests on you guys." She then prepared her medical supplies.
After running tests for data to look at later, Shinobu made her way to inform Sanemi of the situation in person.
She found him scouting for demons out in the forest, and pulled him aside. She informed him of the poison, how it works, as well as the affected Hashira, and was about to tell him the antidote.
"And this involves me how?"
"The Hashira can be kept in commission, and the life drained by the poison can be returned temporarily, if they receive a kiss from an uninfected person." Her friendly grin didn't waver as she said these ridiculous words.
". . So why can't Kanroji do it? Isn't she the literal Hashira of Love? Makes a lot of sense to me."
"The kiss has to be from someone of the same sex," Sanemi rapidly blinked in bewilderment upon hearing this. Shinobu continued. "I tested it. I was injected with the poison too, and I tested the cure with Kanroji. I still have the poison in my system now, so Kanroji and I have to regularly meet up. I also saw it happen to some lower-ranked slayers."
Sanemi took in all the information at once, and was silent for a few seconds.
". . Not sure how to feel about where this is going." He scoffed.
"Well, Master Ubuyashiki wishes to tell you more about it. So we have to go there now." Shinobu concluded the conversation, and began running to the Master's estate. Sanemi, angry about her getting a head-start, rushed to follow.
When they arrived, Shinobu and Sanemi both kneeled before the Master.
"Sanemi, first and foremost, I would like to apologize, for I am about to assign you a most difficult and heavy responsibility." He was sincere, words flowing mellifluously into their ears.
"No, not at all. It’s my duty." Sanemi felt an immediate need to correct him.
"Thank you," he then began to explain. "Thankfully, Shinobu has given you most of the details, so now I'd like to properly and formally request your service."
Sanemi looked up at him.
"With all the affected Hashira being males, save for Shinobu, they requested you to assist them with their recovery, and to essentially be their medicine, until their bodies naturally rid of the venom."
Sanemi then shot a glance at Shinobu, who just smiled back.
She didn't tell him about this detail. They requested him? That's weird. That's weird as hell!
But he had to push down his thoughts for later, because the Master was still talking.
"I humbly ask you to accept this mission. I'm sure the Hashira chose you because you are a most dutiful slayer, who will do anything to protect people from demons."
"Yes, Master, I will fulfill my task."
"Thank you, my dear child," He smiled. "now, Shinobu, please take him to go see everyone. They must be in great pain." Sanemi cursed in his head, for the Master's smile was way too genuine and sweet to argue that he was teasing.
"You heard the Master. Thank you, and let's go." Shinobu was definitely teasing, though.
As soon as they got out of the Master's earshot, Sanemi lashed out at Shinobu.
"This is absurd. And ridiculous. They chose me? Psh. I bet it was all Tengen's doing, I bet he chose me outta spite. I can't believe this." Shinobu covered her laughter with her hand.
"Actually, they all came up with a consensus together. You could ask them about it! And don't forget, Tomioka and Iguro are in that group. Jeez, you really have it bad." Sanemi scowled.
"Don't act like you weren't probably a complete mess asking Mitsuri to kiss you. Wish I saw that."
Shinobu clicked her tongue and stayed silent, showing Sanemi that she indeed was a completely embarrassed mess at that time.
The time was now approaching the evening, as sweet orange rays covered the Butterfly Mansion. Shinobu gently knocked on the door to the ward where the boys were.
"He's here, everyone," she announced before sliding open the door.
Kyoujurou was curled up in Tengen's lap, who was sitting criss-cross and hugging him. They both looked like they had a fever— Kyoujurou was hugging himself like he had a stomach bug, and Tengen's long hair was sticking to his face, which was scrunched up in discomfort. The two felt better holding each other, though. Obanai and Giyuu were quite the opposite—Obanai's face was buried in his pillow, and Giyuu was miserably laying on his side, breathing shakily. Only Tengen opened his eyes to react to Shinobu's call, as the others were too tired now.
"Wow, you all look like shit," said Sanemi. But to his surprise, everyone immediately shot up, seeming to only now realize he was there. Kyoujurou got up to look at him, Tengen straightened his back, and Obanai and Giyuu sat up quickly. They all felt a spark of energy. Obanai did immediately feel nauseous from sitting up too fast, though.
"Your savior has arrived, okay?" Shinobu comforted them. "But I won't stay to watch. Please, have fun. Don't push yourself too hard, Sanemi!"
"Huh? The fuck is that supposed to mean?!" He snapped, but the door was already slid shut. That damn pestering insect was too fast.
But anyway, Sanemi didn't know how to even start.
He watched as everyone stood up from their beds. They all started to get up and walk over to him, like they were trying to initiate the . . business, but they stopped a few feet away from him, all lined up. So now they just stood rigidly side-by-side.
Sanemi took a good look at them. Rengoku was fidgeting with his fingers, Uzui was scratching his neck and avoiding eye contact, Tomioka was standing as awkwardly as he always does, but this time with his head down. He looked ashamed—the bastard. And Iguro, who moved to the end of the line, was standing just as awkwardly, but was looking off to the side.
Sanemi slowly tilted his head as he stared at them. Something was off, and this was ridiculous.
No, Sanemi couldn't have this.
"For fuck's sake. Hurry it up! Are you morons seriously risking your own death 'cause you're afraid of a little kiss?" Sanemi started shouting at them, and they all were a little startled as they had been nervously dozing off. "You idiots can't let a shitty poison keep you in this sorry state! It's seriously pissing me off!"
Everyone paused, but this seemed to make them all come back to their senses. So, a few seconds later, Kyoujurou began to walk up to Sanemi, clearly flustered.
". . I would like to go first, then!" He mustered up all his courage to declare this conviction. It was unexpected to Sanemi, and really everyone except Tengen, that Kyoujurou was as shy as this. He was truly bad at the affairs of romance. However shy he was, though, he still stared at Sanemi with determination.
"At least someone's got balls," He spoke as Kyoujurou walked up to him.
Then, Sanemi suddenly grabbed the collar of Kyoujurou's shirt with one hand, held his head with the other, and pulled him into a rough kiss. Sanemi's lips were pretty soft, but the force with which he kissed was pushing Kyoujurou back. Kyoujurou immediately shut his eyes in reaction. His heart beat rapidly.
Sanemi pulled away a few seconds later, mostly because Kyoujurou's face was getting extremely hot, like an oven. His eyes opened slowly, while Kyoujurou's shot open as soon as the two separated, in shock.
When Sanemi gazed up at Kyoujurou's eyes rather than his lips, he noticed how wide they were. He looked a little bit frightened, which, to be honest, made Sanemi feel great satisfaction, although he wouldn't admit something so embarrassing. He smugly grinned, though.
Thinking he was done, he let go of his grip on Kyoujurou's collar, and was getting ready to move on to Tengen–
"I uh, I think it was too short!" Kyoujurou lightly tugged Sanemi's haori sleeve. Sanemi raised a brow. "The poison's effects haven't fully disappeared!"
And even more suddenly as Sanemi initially kissed Kyoujurou, Kyoujurou forced him into some kind of dramatic ballroom position. With one hand, he lifted one of Sanemi's legs up, causing Sanemi to fall backward, and also allowing room for Kyoujurou's other hand to slip under his back, supporting him. Sanemi's arm wrapped around Kyoujurou's neck instinctively as he felt he was falling. In this ample position, Kyoujurou then leaned down to give Sanemi quite a theatrical kiss. Was this revenge for Sanemi taking him by surprise? Sanemi wondered.
Tengen, who had been watching in shock along with Obanai and Giyuu, blurted out: "Wow, flashy, Kyou!". He felt proud of the guy for overcoming his shyness and just going for it.
Kyoujurou did not hold back during this make-out session. He had shared a few kisses before, so he was a lot more experienced than Sanemi. Furthermore, he cooled down a little, so he knew the burning up he felt was from Sanemi's face.
Finally, when Kyoujurou felt content, he pulled away, and began to gently lift Sanemi back upright. As he did, Sanemi stared at him with a profoundly confused expression. Such an expression was indescribable, but, to attempt, it looked like he was figuring out whether he should express more rage, shame and embarrassment, or shock, and the process of figuring this out was showing on his face, like he was buffering. Kyoujurou could imagine the cogs spinning in his head. Furthermore, his whole body was becoming increasingly pink, especially the tips of his ears. So he stared at Kyoujurou speechless for a few seconds.
"Oh, wow, it has truly worked! I feel completely better now!! Thank you, Sanemi!"
This brought Sanemi back to his senses, so he was able to move again. After backing up from Kyoujurou, he crossed his arms nonchalantly.
". . Whatever. It's just a kiss. Now who's next? Man the fuck up!"
Then, Tengen eagerly moved up closer to Sanemi.
"I call dibs!" He towered over the angry man. Then, he gasped. "Oh, I have an idea! We should try to see who can give Sanemi the flashiest kiss!"
"Hah?" Sanemi's head tilted.
"I won't lose to you, Kyoujurou!"
In the instant after Tengen's declaration, he effortlessly hoisted Sanemi up against the wall, with his arms wrapped around the smaller man's legs. Before Sanemi could realize he was repositioned, Tengen's lips crashed against his. The sudden impact was disorienting, but then became softer, as Tengen started to gently lean into Sanemi. This displayed his clearly superior experience—especially when he started to use his tongue.
This was probably gonna be the end of Sanemi. He conceived this thought while still only being on his second kiss, knowing that he had many, many more to get through.
Sanemi trembled a little as the sensation was way too intense. It was made ten times worse when Tengen started pressing his chest against Sanemi.
When Tengen pulled away for air, after what felt like an eternity, Sanemi whipped his head around to not look at the man, because he was truly overwhelmed with embarrassment. Tengen could tell from his burning face.
But this embarrassment mostly came from being utterly dominated (again). And thus, Sanemi sought revenge and the return of his pride.
"Do you seriously . ." he huffed. ". . have to turn everything into a competition!"
He used his words to charge his attack on Tengen, in which he pushed him back with great force, making him stumble and release Sanemi. Then, now standing on his own two feet, he grabbed Tengen's face and pulled him into another rough make-out session.
Sanemi pulled away after a long period of stealing each other's breath to make another remark.
"'Cause it makes me competitive too."
He successfully got the better of Tengen, which pleased Sanemi. But the words that followed pleased him not.
"Oh, man! Haha, you win, Sanemi!" After overcoming his bafflement, Tengen pulled Sanemi into a tight hug. "But look! You're blushing so much, like Kyoujurou!" He spoke while pinching the tip of his rosy ear.
Sanemi's veins popped and he punched Tengen in the stomach, disregarding the fact that he was already bedridden. He laid on the floor blinking as the air was knocked out of him a second time; he probably had none left in his lungs now. Kyoujurou helped him up.
Next, Sanemi turned to Obanai and Giyuu. Even after his earlier speech, they still looked a little bit shameful. He sighed.
"Come here, Tomioka." As the four men stood in a line, Sanemi resolved to help Giyuu next.
"Give him somethin' flamboyant, Giyuu!"
"What's with all of you and the first names?"
"Hey, ya can't get closer to someone than ya can by kissing them! Or, by having to kiss the same man to save your lives with them." Tengen responded. "You should get rid of the last name, too!"
"Shut it. Anyway, you two don't look as . . eager as the other two. I doubt you had much say in choosing me."
Obanai and Giyuu immediately corrected him.
"No, we did," said Giyuu, and then Obanai nodded.
". . Oh." Sanemi was a little surprised.
"Not like we had much of a choice. You think I'd kiss Himejima?" Obanai crossed his arms, hissing.
"Well, let's get this over with. But still, I'm not gonna make this unpleasant. So I want to make sure you're both okay with this, starting with you, Tomioka." Sanemi made eye contact with Giyuu, and got closer to him.
"Are you sure this is alright? You don't have anyone else to do it for you?" His voice became softer, which was foreign to Giyuu, and also quieter.
Giyuu’s breath hitched and his shoulders tensed as he prepared to speak.
". . . I am fine with it. But . . are you?"
Tengen and Kyoujurou had just gotten up to watch what was happening, but upon hearing Giyuu’s words, they were quite confused, as was Obanai, and especially Sanemi.
"Huh? The fuck? You saying you think I won't do my duty to slay all demons?" Sanemi walked up to him and roughly grabbed his collar, twisting the fabric. "Who the fuck do you think—" Giyuu cut him off.
"No, I just . ." he spoke quietly, unfazed by the fact he was being grabbed. "Are you sure you're okay with doing this with an inferior slayer?"
What?
Sanemi ever so slightly loosened his grip, and his lips parted. The others were frozen as well.
". . inferior?" Under his breath, Sanemi repeated Giyuu.
"Giyuu, what are you talking about!" Tengen shouted.
"Yeah, explain yourself," agreed Sanemi. His eyes locked with Giyuu's. It seemed to Giyuu, and probably to the others, that Sanemi's eyes had a certain quality that made one unable to look away from them.
". . I feel sorry for forcing you to kiss someone like me. A lower person."
"What—No, the inferior part! Explain that! What the fuck makes you think you're 'inferior'??"
"I thought I told you all."
"You didn't tell us shit!"
"When I said I wasn't like you guys," the two had been going back-and-forth, but this time Sanemi allowed Giyuu to finish, mostly due to his own shock. "it's because I'm not a real Hashira."
Sanemi tilted his head, but then released Giyuu from his grip and stood in front of him.
"Okay, what? You're not getting a kiss 'til you explain this. So tell us now."
Well, there was no going back now.
Everyone was looking at Giyuu, and he supposed that it would only be right if he explained himself to his superiors, so that they don't get the wrong idea of him being equal to them just because of his title. Furthermore, he wouldn’t get his kiss until he did. So he had to be clear with them. He started to recall the time he opened up about this fact to Tanjirou.
" . . Okay." he clenched his fists in frustration with himself. "I never passed Final Selection."
Tengen and Kyoujurou sat down on their bed to listen to Giyuu. He appreciated how everyone's eyes didn't seem to peer into him, just seemed to see him.
"I fell unconscious on the first day. When I woke up, I was told that one person slayed most of the demons on the mountain, but he was the only one in the whole group who died. That was my best friend." He gritted his teeth.
"He was a better breather than me. He would've been a much better Hashira. He was better for everything—"
Giyuu's self-hate-speech was then suddenly cut off by . . Sanemi tackling him to the wall. He almost fell, but he reacted quickly to support both himself and Sanemi against the wall. Then Sanemi started yelling at him.
"You fucking moron! This whole time, I thought you said you were different because you thought you were better than us!"
Huh?
Giyuu couldn't understand this one bit. Sanemi seemed to take note of that.
"Jeez! You never thought to explain yourself? You dipshit!" Sanemi continued.
"I must say I assumed the same!" Kyoujurou agreed. Giyuu looked around, and Tengen was nodding. Obanai was glaring at him. Then, he looked back at Sanemi.
". . You guys thought . . that I thought I was superior . . the whole time?" He spoke almost in a whisper, seeming to retreat into himself. Sanemi scoffed.
"Is that so shocking? Giyuu, you created a breathing technique. You're one of the best Hashira. Of course we fucking thought that! You have lots of things to brag about!"
Giyuu felt really bad. But he also couldn't really tell how he felt. His mind was jumbled up and confused. It seemed like Sanemi could tell, so he slowed down a bit.
". . Listen."
Only when Sanemi started to pull his face a little bit farther away did Giyuu notice that they had been inches apart.
"First of all, saying you're not a Hashira is denying the words of Master Ubuyashiki. Secondly, it's denying everything you've done to get to this point. Do you think that, just because you didn't slay any demons during Final Selection, you also didn't slay the Lower Moon that made you a Hashira? It's a ridiculous line of thinking."
This was truly random. The two were about to kiss, but then Sanemi got caught up fixing Giyuu’s self-worth issues. Yet, even though everyone knew how ridiculous this whole situation was, they didn’t think about it. Sanemi couldn’t have cared less about how random it was. Giyuu was just appreciative of him. And the others who were watching were glad that Sanemi was able to help him.
Though, back to the topic at hand, Sanemi spoke so sternly into Giyuu's ears that it made him want to melt in the words. But while he completely took in and understood the words, the way Sanemi delivered them started to make Giyuu a little . . distracted. He also began to realize that, since Sanemi tackled his head into Giyuu's chest, the man was slightly below him, and was looking up at him. This slightly distracted him as well.
"And thirdly, I fully believe that your best friend would not deny your status as a Hashira. You got here just like the rest of us did, Giyuu. I can't believe you thought otherwise just because of one day. And again, for fuck's sake you created a breathing technique . ." he began to ramble about his frustration with the way Giyuu's mind worked.
Giyuu would forever cherish these words. These words meant the world to him, and he embraced each one. And he admired how lovingly Sanemi said them as well. But when he finished scolding him, and was just rambling now, Giyuu allowed himself to be completely distracted. In this prolonged eye contact he was enveloped in, he was able to immerse himself in the details of Sanemi's face, and noticed some things. He realized that, with Sanemi under him, he looked so much more . . endearing. His eyes were only on Giyuu, and his arms gripped Giyuu's shoulders, and Giyuu found it oddly cute. He hardly blinked as he stared at the man.
"Seriously. I say the word a lot, but I truly mean it when I say you are a moron—"
Unable to repress his urges, Giyuu then cut off Sanemi by pulling their faces together in a kiss.
"WOW! Today's just full of surprises! Giyuu Flashy-oka!" Tengen untimely began to clap.
"Shut the fuck up," Obanai hissed. Like he did with all the other make-out sessions, he looked away, although it was definitely a struggle.
Soon, Giyuu was suffocating Sanemi. He buried his hands in his white hair, stroking it with his fingers, as he messily and mercilessly kissed the man. Sanemi was not expecting his use of tongue.
Giyuu's skin was cold all over, but his mouth was warm, and he was hoarding Sanemi’s air. Even though it was in the most normal position, this was probably Sanemi's most deadly kiss yet, as at one point he didn't give the man any air for thirty seconds. It was probably the most embarrassing thirty seconds of Sanemi's life. When he finally pulled away, Sanemi looked dazed.
". . You fucking asshole!!" Sanemi gasped for air. "Would it kill you all not to treat this like a contest!? Look, Giyuu, now you're really acting like you're better than me!"
"Sorry . . I can't help it." said Giyuu.
"Hahahaha! Nothing wrong with bein' a bottom, Sanemi!"
Sanemi whipped his head around to glare at Tengen, but Giyuu caught him and turned him back to face him, before pulling him into another life-threatening kiss.
"Someone let me fucking dominate!!" thought Sanemi.
After some more suffocation, humiliation, and sloppy kissing, Giyuu finally pulled away.
"Thank you, I feel better now,"
It took all of Sanemi's willpower not to punch him in the fucking face right now. He only resisted because he didn't want to beat up a guy who just poured his heart out to him.
"Yeah, whatever, just let me go," Giyuu didn't realize that he was still holding Sanemi's face.
" . . Shinazugawa, can I call you by your first name?"
Sanemi stared at him with his mouth agape for a few seconds.
"I mean, well, first of all, these other fucking guys are just doing whatever they want, so I truly don't care anymore," he raised his arm at Tengen and Kyoujurou. "And second: Giyuu, I literally just fucking made out with you! And I've been calling you by your first name! Why are you so damn polite!?" Obanai shook as he tried to hide his laughter. Giyuu deadpanned.
Giyuu thought about getting his revenge on Obanai a little.
"Okay, Sanemi. I think you need to go kiss Obanai now, then."
Obanai slowly turned his head to Giyuu, and Giyuu swore he could see his locks of hair rising as if he was a vengeful ghost. But his snake, Kaburamaru, wasn't glaring at him, so he was happy.
"God, that's gonna take some getting used to." Sanemi shuddered at Giyuu using his first name. "But you're right. Don't want him to die." He turned to Obanai.
"Giyuu, c'mere, we're gonna give you a hug!" Tengen and Kyoujurou got up and started walking up to Giyuu with or without his approval. He honestly just stood there stunned, awkwardly.
Giyuu was right about Sanemi needing to kiss Obanai now, because the poison was probably affecting him the most. He had been stabbed twice during the fight so there was more venom in his system. As a result, his limbs were slightly shaking (only slightly as he was trying to resist it), he was slightly sweating, and his legs felt a little weak. His body felt heavy, but he wanted to stay standing. Though, for all four of the men, their state got a little bit better when Sanemi arrived, as if their bodies recognized that the pain was going to be removed soon. So they were all a bit more awake when they saw Sanemi.
Sanemi then began leisurely walking up to Obanai as if he was about to do the most normal thing ever. Still, he wanted to make sure Obanai was comfortable.
But as he was approaching him, Sanemi then had an idea. Without warning, he lifted Obanai up by placing his hands on his sides, walked to the other end of the room, and then placed Obanai down. The others watched in confusion, confusion that was definitely shared by Obanai.
After placing him down, but while still holding him, Sanemi leaned in to speak closer to Obanai's ear.
"I thought you probably wouldn't want them to watch," his voice was gentle. Way too gentle. Like, if Obanai tried to tell people it was Sanemi who did such a kind thing, they wouldn't believe him.
". . Yeah. I didn't. Thanks." Obanai always expressed his appreciation bluntly.
"Alright," Sanemi loosened his hold on the man's waist and gazed into his eyes, finally getting down to business. "you ready, now?"
But Obanai still felt . . . wrong.
He felt this way the whole time, from the moment he was told he had to kiss someone.
Unfortunately, Obanai had yet to come to terms with the fact that he had a hideous, abhorrent scar slit across his face.
"I . . um."
Sanemi noticed how Obanai was fumbling, which was unusual for the man, so he waited patiently. What was wrong with him? Sure he could be a little shy, but he was also really stubborn. His shyness wouldn't make him like this, especially when lives were at stake. So something else, something really significant to Obanai, had to be causing him to override his principles like this.
". . I advise you to close your eyes, Sanemi."
Huh?
"What? Why?"
Obanai's eyes drifted away. Sanemi was genuinely confused. He leaned down so he could hear Obanai better, since he had been slightly mumbling . .
"My scar." He then barked. He said 'scar' with such discontent that it made Sanemi's shoulders jump a little. But . . what? This was about his fucking scar?
Sanemi stared at him with his mouth agape for a second, which made Obanai squint his eyes in annoyance.
"Do I seriously need to spell it out for you? It's disgusting, my scar is disgusting, and I already feel bad that you have to touch it, so you should close your eyes so you don't have to see it too."
"Hey, the fuck?" Sanemi began, and then he noticed that Obanai was scratching his legs, so he gently grabbed his wrists and lifted them away before continuing. "Don't feel insecure now, the hell? You think I'm grossed out by that? Hell no!" His gentle actions did not match up with his words.
But Obanai did not change his stance. He had been believing for years that he bore an utterly sickening scar, representative of his sickening self, so Sanemi's words went in one ear and out the other. He ignored him and diverted his gaze.
"Obanai, I quite literally haven't seen anyone with more scars than me, and I fully display them because I'm proud. You think I'd feel any different about yours?"
"You don't understand." Obanai shot back. "Yours were earned valiantly, from earned victories. I only got mine because I was weak."
Then, Sanemi grunted in annoyance.
He was about to speak, but then he stopped himself. Suddenly, he whipped his head around at the other guys, who were very clearly watching the two. They jumped at his sudden turn-around.
"Cover Tengen's ears!" He shouted. Then, he turned back at Obanai.
"I don't want to close my eyes, Obanai," he whispered tenderly. " . . I think your scar's beautiful, alright? And it's badass. It shows that you've been through shit, and that you survived. That you're not weak anymore. And . . seriously, you shithead, I just kissed Giyuu Tomioka, the guy we both fucking hate, or, hated . . But, do you really think I'd have any issue kissing you?"
Obanai finally started to listen. Sanemi then started to caress his bandages with his thumb.
"You can cover it around people, but I need you to know, I'll always think it's fuckin' sick,"
. . .
Obanai wondered. He thought back to how Sanemi hated everyone's competitiveness and eagerness to 'win' against him. But, seriously, how could Sanemi say such sweet, caring things, and not expect the receiver to absolutely smother—no, drown him in affection? Obanai wasn't one to favor physical touch, but how could he resist Sanemi right now?
So, a few seconds after Sanemi was done, Obanai moved.
Utilizing the element of surprise, as well as his swiftness, it took Obanai less than a moment to send Sanemi to the ground and pin him down. He first landed a blow to his stomach, knowing fully from several training sessions that it wouldn't affect Sanemi in the slightest, and then swiped his feet so that he'd fall. Obanai went with him and twisted his hands around Sanemi's wrists to pin them to the ground. He had wrapped and locked him like a snake.
He was slightly interrupted by Tengen's obnoxiousness, though.
"Wow, snake-bro, I'm so proud!" Tengen pretended to shed a tear. Fearing both Sanemi and Obanai's reactions, Giyuu and Kyoujurou both put their hands over Tengen's mouth. He definitely said some more absurd things, but they were muffled.
In the same moment, while Sanemi had the wind knocked out of him, Obanai pulled down his bandages and brought him into a kiss. Obanai didn't want to let him take control at all, and so he made sure the boy could barely breathe.
Unlike the others, though, his kiss was not messy. It was a lot more gentle, or soft. Maybe it was because Obanai was still very not used to having this part of his face touched. And he also probably still felt a little uneasy about the idea of someone else feeling his scar, so the kiss was gentle and a little held-back. Though it still suffocated Sanemi purely because of how long it lasted.
Both of their faces were not visible to the other three men because they were facing the other way, but they still obviously knew what was going on. And at one point, Giyuu and Kyoujurou looked away out of shyness, because it started to look like Obanai was devouring Sanemi. Tengen watched in admiration, though. And he also felt a little inspired.
A bit later, Obanai released Sanemi and stood up above him. Then he pulled up his bandages.
". . Just because I'm a little insecure doesn't mean I'm going to lose to you." Obanai was definitely one of the more competitive Hashira.
Giyuu and Kyoujurou slowly removed their hands from Tengen's mouth, and he immediately seized the opportunity.
"I can't believe this! You guys are totally awesome! I never knew you had that in ya, snake-bro!"
"Do not call me that." Obanai shot daggers.
Then, while still being on the floor, Sanemi wailed.
"Aagh! All of you are fuckin' bastards!" He gripped his hair with his hands and ran them down his face, like he was going crazy. Only then did everyone notice how much he had been blushing, as his palms were a completely different color than the rest of him. The tips of his ears looked like they were bloody, and his whole body was pink. "I do this for you all just to be humiliated . . ! I'll fucking kill all of you!!"
He then stood up with clenched fists. His temperature was probably increasing exponentially. Everyone stared at him with definitely unapologetic nor sympathetic expressions, as they didn’t regret a thing—but they were startled by his dramatic outburst.
Sanemi then growled. "If that's how you want to have it, I am leaving!"
"Oh, don't forget to come by at the same time tomorrow!" Tengen cooed, teasing dastardly as Sanemi was sliding open the door. This definitely set off another fire in Sanemi, probably the hundredth one today. He resisted snapping the door in half with his bare hands as he stepped out.
Now it was silent.
Everyone looked at each other one-by-one, with their eyes still widely opened, and were probably not very sure how to feel.
Giyuu now felt the extreme embarrassment and remorse kick in. He looked down and interlocked his hands together as if he was about to spend a long time reflecting on his actions. Obanai looked at him, and then at Kyoujurou, who looked equally as awkward. But both him and Tengen were idiotically smiling. They wore a smile that two people would wear if they had just done something extremely stupid as well as possibly illegal together, and knew they were about to face the consequences, or just did face them, but didn't care. Perhaps that, minus the illegality, was exactly what just happened. And the two did not feel any remorse.
". . So uh, who won?"
Referring back to the spontaneous 'competition', Tengen broke the silence, and everyone stared at each other, unmoving.
"I must say I have to give it to Obanai!" Kyoujurou crossed his arms like a proud uncle. "That was truly impressive! Not many people could handle the Wind Hashira like that,"
Obanai seethed.
"Aw, give yourself some more credit! You treated him like a princess!" Tengen smiled at Kyoujurou. "Though, I gotta say, Giyuu, that kiss was something else."
Giyuu buried his face in his hands and trembled as soon as Tengen said his name. He was done with this.
"I'm leaving to train." Obanai declared and started getting ready to leave.
A few seconds later, though, the damned Shinobu walked in.
"Hi everyone, how did it go?" She spoke way too cheerfully, and the worst part was that she seemed so genuinely happy. Tengen probably hasn't seen her this happy on her birthday.
That night, Sanemi miserably failed to sleep. He could not cool himself down no matter how many windows he opened, no matter how much of the cold evening air came in, and no matter how many articles of clothing he removed from himself. Because he knew, with utmost certainty, that he had a great number of humiliating days coming for him—days full of kissing dudes. And he didn't know whether he looked forward to it or not.
Though, one thing that was uncertain was how long it would go on for. Ubuyashiki didn’t give him a specific amount of time. But he assumed that it would last around a week, as that’s how most poisons last. But wait—that’s just how long poisons last in his body. It could probably take a different amount of time for the others to recover. He never considered this, so it kept him up even longer.
Nevertheless, he was right about the coming humiliation.
It was now the second day of his hellish mission, and he actually managed to get a few hours of sleep, thank goodness. He woke up really early in the morning, though, because he has a unique sleep schedule, at least in comparison to his coworkers. Unlike many other slayers, Sanemi slept in the evening and woke up in the middle of the night to fight demons, so he was always up at ungodly hours of the morning. So even though he wasn’t assigned a mission last night, he still woke up early out of habit.
Now, it was still pretty early in the day, and he was trying to get his mind off of the whole situation by training in the sun. Early-morning training was another habit of his. Bashing dummies really helped him forget the fact that he'd have to go . . tend to his new responsibilities in a few hours. He would find a better way to describe such a mission if he wasn't actively trying to remove it from his mind.
The leaves rustled as the soft sun seeped through them, illuminating Sanemi's hair. He was always active in the morning as he enjoyed the warmth of dawn across his face. Strangely, it made him feel a lot calmer, more peaceful. So did the orange sun of the evening, though he could not see the color. While the pigment and shade of the warmth was a mystery to him, he knew that it was warmth, because he felt it, deep in his skin, within his heart.
It was a shame that not many people dared to approach Sanemi during his training hours, because if they could see him in the gentle morning rays, they would think he was an angel.
Giyuu was a daring person.
He was horribly attempting to hide behind a shaded tree in Sanemi's training grounds, watching him closely. His intense staring combined with his lack of expression made him kind of look like a creep. But he admired how focused Sanemi seemed to be on his practice. He also appreciated that his concentration made him not notice Giyuu.
Or so he thought.
In an instant, he felt an intense presence loom behind him. But Giyuu was fast, too, so in the next instant, he turned around to block whatever was coming at him.
This resulted in Giyuu raising his arms in an X to shield himself from Sanemi's punch, but he lost his balance in the process. Sanemi quickly tackled him to the ground right after, too.
Sanemi was about to grab Giyuu's collar, as he was back in his slayer uniform—but he hesitated. He hesitated because he saw Giyuu's tired face and messy hair, and because he coughed when he hit the ground. It must be the poison. So, he just kept him pinned to the ground so he could demand an explanation without harming him further.
"So tell me why on Earth you're here," he growled. "you stalking me?"
"I wanted my kiss now," Giyuu’s bluntness and ability to be undisturbed seemed to get under Sanemi's skin and irritate him, because his eye twitched. Giyuu took note of this so he tried to explain himself more. ". . and I wanted to talk to you."
Sanemi crossed his arms.
". . Why should I give it to you now? Give me a reason. Why should you get it earlier than the others, hm?"
"My body hurts now, I need it,"
"Jeez, well, at least you get straight to the point." Sanemi scoffed. "Fine."
Sanemi and Giyuu helped each other get into an upright position, both sitting on their knees. Then, Sanemi brought him into a much more innocent kiss than the last one they shared. The sunlight really did bring out the sweetness and serenity of him. Giyuu basked in this affectionate kiss, and held Sanemi's face like before.
However, as he was still mortified from yesterday's embarrassment, Giyuu pulled away first, not wanting to let himself get too carried away.
The two gazed into each other's eyes calmly. Sanemi was still a little bit lost in a trance from being kissed, so he was quite silent. His eyes looked soft and tranquil. Giyuu then realized how rare this moment of a peaceful Sanemi was, and even almost smiled. But he then wanted to start talking.
"Sanemi," he began. "do you really think I'm a Hashira, just like all of you? That I'm equal?"
Sanemi sighed. "Is this what you wanted to talk to me about? Yes, you are. Don't make me say it again."
Giyuu gave him a very small smile. One would have to argue that his mouth even moved.
"Thank you."
"But don't think you're equal to me! I'm much stronger than you!" He had to add.
"Ah . . would you like to spar, then?"
"Oh? You wanna prove me wrong?"
"Not really, I just want to train . ." Giyuu started to stand up. "Do you?"
"Sure, since ya asked nicely." Sanemi stood up as well, and with a smile. The two then headed to where the bokken swords were stored.
The two spent probably around an hour training before getting tired and parting ways. Sanemi was relieved to see that Giyuu looked healthy and energetic since he had just received a kiss.
But, as promised, the time for everyone else to receive theirs arrived. Sanemi struggled to bring himself to the Butterfly Mansion, and when he finally did, all of Shinobu's apprentices looked shy as hell. They all knew why he was there, and he wanted to crawl up in a hole and die. Thankfully they tried to ignore him out of respect.
Later, he reluctantly approached the door to the room.
". . I'm here. Coming in." He knocked before carefully sliding the door open.
"Hey!!" He was obnoxiously greeted by Tengen, who ran up to him and slung his arm over his shoulder. "I've been bored outta my mind 'cause I can't go on missions yet! You gotta help me heal!"
"Shut it, let's get this over with." He tightly gripped Tengen's arm and strained to pull it off.
"I call dibs on being first!"
Sanemi then smiled.
"Actually, you're not first," Sanemi quickly turned to glare at Giyuu. "'cause this greedy fucker got his early," he pointed.
"What!" Tengen whipped his head around. "Giyuu!" Obanai also glared at Giyuu.
"Did you really?" asked Kyoujurou.
"So he didn't tell any of you? A few hours ago he creeped up on me and demanded I kiss him now," he smirked.
". . It wasn't without reason."
"Bullshit!" Giyuu looked away with a poker face.
The kisses were much easier today, and Sanemi wasn't a complete mess this time. He was actually able to prevent himself from being absolutely manhandled. However, when it came to Obanai's, another embarrassing incident occurred.
Obanai was the last to receive his kiss again, and when it was his turn, he first walked to the end of the room so Sanemi could follow. But this elicited a particular comment from Tengen.
"Why don't you two just go into another room?"
Sanemi and Obanai turned their heads. That suggestion put an idea in their heads that wasn't the most welcome or desirable, so they both resorted to becoming angry at Tengen. Obanai gave him a death glare, and Sanemi took care of the words, telling him to "Just shut up!" in response.
"Okay, okay," Tengen raised his arms in defense. "Oh, right, it would be unfair if he gets privacy and we don't!"
"I don't think that was the exact issue, Tengen!" Kyoujurou hinted. Tengen did not get it.
"Huh?"
Kyoujurou's brows furrowed, and he motioned for Tengen to come closer so he could whisper. Giyuu watched in bafflement at how they were acting like middle-schoolers.
"It would probably be indecent!" He grimaced.
"Oh . . OH! Hahaha!" Tengen, who made dirty jokes all the time, was shocked that he didn't understand the suggestion he made.
And just like that, another day passed.
On the third day, Sanemi was surprised again.
He was going for a walk a few hours before he would have to report to duty (kissing everyone), taking a route that was filled with cherry blossoms. It was currently early Spring, so the path was littered with pink petals, and the evening sun maintained a comforting temperature. Sanemi also had some sweets earlier as a treat.
But then, something dashed by him.
He whipped his head around to follow the shadowy figure, and then it appeared in front of him. It was a person dressed in dark colors that contrasted the rest of the surroundings. But when he reached out a hand to grab them, they just barely slipped away—and then he found himself pressed against a tree.
"Hey, fuckin—"
"Hey."
Sanemi's eyes then fell upon Obanai, who interrupted him, and who was currently taking off his mask.
"Come here." He demanded. Big talk for such a short man, Sanemi thought. He was going to say that, but someone else’s tongue then caught his own: Obanai was kissing him.
But Sanemi was shocked, because this time, Obanai actually seemed less shy to kiss him, less afraid of their skin touching. Sanemi could actually feel his scar, his super cool scar, and that made him feel really flushed, even though it was weird and embarrassing as hell. He also couldn't bring himself to close his eyes because he realized that he was given a once-in-a-lifetime chance to look at it uncovered.
Obanai pulled away, but didn't take his eyes off of Sanemi's lips.
"Hmm, mochi?"
He was about to go back in and finish what he started, but he was interrupted.
A man's booming voice suddenly invaded the space around them, namely Tengen's. They couldn't hear his footsteps, but he was approaching rapidly.
"Hey, Obanai! You're reservin' early like Tomioka too, huh!?" He was coming straight for Obanai, even though he was still in the middle of a steamy session with Sanemi (Alternative fic title: SSS, Steamy Sessions with Sanemi™). Obanai dashed into the air to dodge.
However, after Obanai avoided his tackling, Tengen then turned to Sanemi, who still seemed to be stuck to the timber. Then he grabbed the man's arms and embraced him into a rough, overpowering kiss. Sanemi was utterly befuddled.
"Hey! Wait your turn!" Obanai glared.
Sanemi mentally added to his personal hit-list. Shinobu was first on the list to be murdered, but Sanemi would do that after everyone was cured. And after these two were done playing him like a fiddle!
Sanemi was baffled, but he couldn't do anything but take the kisses! He had no idea why his body was not letting him fight back! And so while Tengen kissed him, he was returning it, but he couldn't get the edge over him at all.
He gasped for air when Tengen finally pulled away.
"Sorry, but this guy's got a mission tonight! So I needed some good luck!" He proudly pointed at himself with his thumbs and smirked.
"I've got one too, dipshit, but I don't need luck, just a little recovery."
"Oh what's the difference?"
And thus, due to this event, Obanai and Tengen did not show up to the evening 'meeting', so it was only Giyuu and Kyoujurou. When they asked where the others were, Sanemi had to bashfully explain his earlier experience.
From that day on, the antics continued, much to Sanemi’s dismay.
Soon, all four of the Hashira started sneaking up on Sanemi and requesting kisses at random times of the day. They still had somewhat of an established meeting time, but Sanemi would only go if he didn't kiss everyone yet that day. The kisses never got any less humiliating for him, but he could tell everyone was getting better at it, and getting more accustomed to it.
Among that, he noticed a lot of things.
Obanai liked sneaking up on him the most, so he started to be a little vigilant, especially during the evening hours. Obanai slept in the mornings after missions instead of the evenings before, so Sanemi didn’t see him in the early hours often.
Tengen seemed to always be able to locate Sanemi. He would barge into his mansion or interrupt his training to ask for a smooch, and these were all at random times. Another thing was that Tengen was absolutely shameless about it. Sometimes, he’d be out walking with his wives when he saw Sanemi, before the established meeting time. And he would, unbelievably so, just see Sanemi and kiss him on the lips like it was a greeting. Imagine: instead of waving to a friend when you encounter them, you embrace them into a sensual, unabashed kiss. That’s what it was like for Sanemi.
Giyuu liked to find him in the mornings, mostly, as if it were a morning routine. Sanemi thought about this but immediately shut down the idea out of embarrassment. For some reason, though, Giyuu started bringing him ohagi, and presented it before the kiss, like he was trying to bribe him or something! Sanemi would get mad each time but still kiss him, and still eat the ohagi.
Kyoujurou, like Obanai, also liked to take Sanemi by surprise, but he was less violent. Kyoujurou sometimes just appeared behind Sanemi with a smile, and extremely closely behind. On the fifth day of the torture whole ordeal, Sanemi was laying down in the Butterfly Mansion garden, and Kyoujurou just appeared. Looming over him. With a big smile. He didn't even ask him properly for a kiss, he just said: "Smooch?" and Sanemi sighed.
All this had been going on for a week by now, and Sanemi was struggling. So, when Mitsuri sent Sanemi a crow asking if he'd like to hang out and have snacks at her estate tomorrow, he accepted instantaneously, immediately ordering his crow to go tell her ‘yes’.
The next day came and Sanemi was looking forward to their meetup.
"Hi Sanemi!" The girl cheered. "Come inside! I'll show you what I bought!"
"Thanks," he entered the mansion with her leading, and they moved to a spacious room with a low wooden table in the middle, as well as two pillows on the ground. On the table was a collection of pink and green sweets and two cups of steaming tea. Sanemi sat down casually after Mitsuri.
As soon as they were seated, Mitsuri began to blabber on and on.
"Okay, so, look how cute this Sakura mochi is! And I got your favorite, ohagi, as well as some matcha warabimochi! And a lot of dango flavors!" Sanemi listened to the girl squeakily ramble. It was a really nice change of pace, and he was really happy to fulfill his sweet tooth, something he and Mitsuri definitely shared and bonded over. As she continued to overexplain, he nodded in approval and recognition. They began eating when she encouraged him to try a flavor with her.
After being fully concentrated on snacking and rating flavors, Mitsuri finally changed the subject.
"So . . I gotta ask! How are you holding up with the um . . the mission that you got!? 'Cause we're totally in the same boat together!!" She immediately shoved a mochi in her mouth to prevent herself from talking more, because she knew she would just feel more awkward.
"Oh, jeez." He sighed. "Um, wait, what the fuck am I supposed to say to that? Yeah, I'm having a wonderful time being made out with all day."
"But . . I think many people would really have a great time doing that!"
"Well these four definitely don't try to make it pleasant. They're assholes."
"How so??"
Sanemi jolted. ". . . It's embarrassing as hell!"
"It's okay! You can tell me! Just let it out!" She laughed and excitedly spouted out affirmations, talking over Sanemi.
"Okay . ." Sanemi placed his index finger on his cheek in contemplation. "I don't really know where to start."
"Oh, I should probably ask you something specific then!! Alright, alright. Hmm." She looked up to the ceiling, forming thought bubbles. "Oh! Do you have a favorite kisser?! Ohmigosh!" She got more flustered than Sanemi even though he was the one receiving the kisses.
"What the hell . ."
"Oh come on, you have to answer!"
"Tch—Hey, wait, also, we're totally not in the same boat! You only have to kiss Shinobu, I have to make out with four different guys!"
"Oh gosh, you're right! I can't imagine that!"
"Sure you can, imagine four Shinobus," he teased. Their conversation moved at an incredible pace, but their energies matched well, so they could understand each other. At this moment, though, it came to a halt, because Mitsuri actually did try to imagine four Shinobus.
Sanemi watched as her face grew increasingly red.
"Aah! I cannot!" She covered her face and looked away. Sanemi laughed at her heartily. She took a moment to catch her breath. In the meantime, Sanemi snagged a few more bites of his ohagi.
"Wait! Don't change the subject, though. I really want you to answer my question!"
". . How the hell am I supposed to do that!"
"Don't worry. Hmm . . just tell me what you think of everyone's kisses, okay? Ohmigosh, start with Rengoku! I'm so curious."
"Fine . . uh, well, he's kind of weird. Well, all of them are. But it's actually kind of a funny story."
Mitsuri began to listen intently to Sanemi, who finally started to pour the tea. Mitsuri sipped her cup as she thought this.
"The first day I met with everyone, it was super fuckin' weird! Like, first, Kyo—Rengoku came up to me, but he was a nervous wreck. So I just kissed him to get it over with, but then he started acting like some kind of prince charming . ." Then, Sanemi suddenly stopped, realizing how embarrassing this was.
"Really!? How so!? Don't stop there!"
"Okay, don't you dare fucking laugh! But he um, tipped me over and held my leg up, and then leaned down and kissed me, like this," he stood up to show her the position he was in, switching from Kyoujurou's position to his own.
"Oh my gosh no freakin' way! No, that seems totally like him!"
"It does? What makes you say that?"
"Well, doesn't he just seem like the kind of guy to go over-the-top like that?"
Sanemi shrugged. But then, Mitsuri gasped. "Wait! Oh my gosh, okay, don't tell him I told you this, but I just realized something. So one time during training, I asked him if he's ever had a romantic partner. He told me that his dad used to make him try and seek out a wife, but none of them ever settled with him. And he told me that all of the women he met up with all described him in one way. They each said he was too 'grandiose'! And, I feel bad, but I totally get it now!!"
"Yeah, he keeps treating me like some kinda princess. Takin' my hand and shit . ." Mitsuri laughed uncontrollably, and fanned herself to cool down.
"Okay, okay, um, Uzui next? He seems interesting! I'm really interested in the others though, too! I'm kind of especially curious about them so I'm saving them for last . ." Mitsuri was curious because she never thought she would hear of the day where Sanemi kisses his best friend, and definitely not the day where he kisses the guy he hated.
"God, this is humiliating . . but it really does make me feel better telling someone about it. Especially you, 'cause I'm gonna make you tell me the whole story of how Shinobu got you to help her,"
"Waah! Fine, after! Tell me about Uzui!"
"Well, he's clearly had the most experience out of everyone, with the three wives 'nd all," he finally felt like he was able to loosen up a little. "but he manages to make me angry every time he kisses me! He always pulls some bullshit! Like, he uses his stature to his advantage, to embarrass me, because he knows I'm gonna try to fight to get the better of him! It's a contest I lose every time, but one fuckin' day . ."
"Wow, that's intense!"
"Oh my god, and I just realized, if you tell Shinobu any part of this—"
"No no, I would never! It's personal."
"Oh, then, you don't have to tell me about Shinobu, 'cause I'd probably tease her to death if I knew anything, so it'd be best if I didn't. Unless you want to."
"Um . . I won't tell you anything embarrassing she did, but I do have a lot of stuff I want to get off of my chest . . ! So I'll tell you after!"
"Alright," the two agreed. "Okay, wait. But what's weird about fuckin' Tengen is that he always gets super sensational with it! Like, he starts whisperin' in my ear! I have to kill him!!" Mitsuri slightly reacted at the use of Uzui's first name, but she realized that it probably made sense, so she just laughed at what he said.
"Okay, who do you want next now?"
"Ohmigosh . . okay, Iguro? It seems like it'd be sweet, since you two are best friends!"
"Not sweet . . not at all. I mean, I think I'd definitely say kissing him is the most enjoyable out of everyone, but only if he kissed me in normal positions! Okay, that sounds weird so let me explain. Like, when I kiss him . . it's like, he's the most gentle, you know? It feels natural. And it's also better 'cause he's my best friend, so it's a lot more comfortable, I guess. But don't let that little shit deceive you! Every time, just like Tengen, he tries to get the better of me and get on top, like he's trying to prove something! It's infuriating!"
"I can imagine him being a little sneaky, yeah,"
"That's exactly how he is! You know, he sometimes just sneaks up on me and demands that we make out that instant. Isn't that fucked up?"
Upon hearing that, Mitsuri did get embarrassed, but was so shocked that she didn't even move, she just opened her mouth in awe. She didn't cover her face or perform any grand gesture, just sat there. Because what on Earth!? This was totally something from a shittily-written-yet-guilty-pleasure romance novel!
"Wow, that's, um," she nervously chuckled. "I feel like you may be leaving out a couple of details, because I can hardly imagine him doing that, but yeah! Pretty fucked up!"
"Oh, but you know what, or who, is especially fucked in the head?? And who makes me super mad every time?" He disregarded her concern. "Well, let me explain to you Giyuu fucking Tomioka. So remember how I told you about the first time I had to kiss everyone? When I had to kiss Giyuu, here's what happened. I just realized I didn't tell you, but it was pretty crazy."
Sanemi then proceeded to explain how he initially misunderstood Giyuu's egotistic proclamation at the Hashira meeting, and then how Giyuu poured his heart out to him before they were going to kiss.
"I already talked to Shinobu about this, and I wished you were there, but I'm telling you now. He said that the reason he felt inferior was because of things from his past that I can't share, but that's all you need to know."
"Wow . . that's really sad,"
"Yes, it was, and so I was telling him that he wasn't like that at all, right?" Sanemi's blood was visibly starting to boil, as Mitsuri noticed that he was getting redder. She wondered if that was due to thinking about whatever made him angry, or due to thinking about kissing Giyuu!
"And then just right after I was telling him all that, you know what the fucker did!? He grabbed me and gave me the most violent, aggressive kiss I've ever had in my life. I think I could've gotten my demon slayer mark from how close I was to fucking dying!!"
"Oh my god!" Mitsuri wiped tears from her laughter. "That's so unlike him! Wow!"
"It got better after that, like he started to be a little more gentle. But now I think he's gradually getting more needy or something . . I'll kill him too . ." he conceived murder plans in his head as he took a bite of mochi. Mitsuri also took a snack break.
Then, she sipped her tea and looked deep into Sanemi's eyes.
"So . . after all that, have you picked a favorite?!" She squealed. "Or . . can you not choose because you really like all of them!?"
"More like I like none of them. They're all assholes." He shut her down.
"Ohmigosh, whatever you say!"
"Yeah, yeah, sure." Sanemi then sipped his own tea, being almost done. "Well then, enough about me. How's it with Shinobu?" He grinned maliciously. Mitsuri immediately grew pink, as if a fuse had been lit inside her.
"Oh gosh, I . . Where do I begin? Eek!"
It's safe to say that Sanemi was there for a long, long time. Sanemi couldn't believe it was Shinobu who was the one who was sick, because Mitsuri's lovesickness came pouring out. She really did have a lot to get off her chest.
She talked about how Shinobu was such a sweet, caring, but also princely girl, kind of like Kyoujurou, but more subtly and naturally. She would always act a little chivalric with Mitsuri, and Mitsuri found it so romantic. But she most loved how cute Shinobu was, with all the little habits she had, and especially when she would nervously ask Mitsuri for a kiss.
Mitsuri's mood swung back and forth as she spoke about Shinobu, and it gave Sanemi whiplash. It was like the sweets were a bribe for him to stay and listen to her chatter.
Two weeks passed since his meetup with Mitsuri, marking three weeks since the whole thing started.
All the four Hashira that Sanemi had to kiss were already out of the Butterfly Mansion, as their injuries recovered.
Though, Sanemi and Mitsuri had just got done with a particularly brutal mission, so they were locked up at Shinobu's right now. But they used this time to their advantage, as they sought to catch up with each other. Now, it was the evening, and they were both sitting in the garden together, peacefully having some desserts they requested, with the breeze accompanying them.
"You're dating Shinobu!?"
The two were having a fun conversation talking about random things, until Mitsuri brought up a particular topic, eliciting this reaction from Sanemi. She wanted to tell Sanemi as soon as possible, so she was excited to use this opportunity to.
"Yes! Ahh, don't remind me!!"
"Since when!? Tell me now! Who confessed?" He spoke so seriously Mitsuri felt like she was being interrogated by officers.
"Okay . . she confessed really recently, and oh my gosh, I would've sent you a crow but I wanted to tell you in person!"
"Nah, I get it. Well, congrats." He smiled at her. She smiled back.
Mitsuri then sipped her tea graciously. After, she let out a satisfied exhale, and placed her cup back on the table.
“Ahh! Seriously, Sanemi, I can't believe it might have not happened were it not for the poison!"
"I'm sure you would've found a way."
"Well jeez . . I'm getting too embarrassed talking about it! Oh, right, I wanted to ask you, Sanemi, how have you been? Last time we talked, it seemed like having to kiss everyone every day was really difficult! I hope you weren't overwhelmed!"
"Oh, well," he took a second to gather his thoughts. "Thanks for asking, first of all. It's been alright. It's not as difficult as it was before, which is a given, since I've been doing it for so long."
". . Been doing it for so long? " Mitsuri wondered.
"It also helps that I don't have to kiss them every single day now. They're all recovering, so they just come to me when they start feelin’ shitty again, which is usually every other day. So it’s been pretty manageable.”
Mitsuri tilted her head.
"I guess I'm just getting used to it," Sanemi spoke under his breath. He didn't really mean to say that out loud, but he didn't really regret it, either. It wasn't a lie. Because anything can become a habit. "duty gets easier when it becomes routine.
"Sanemi . . you know they're better now, right? All those guys?"
"Hm? Well yeah, I know that they're all going on missions again, if that's what you mean,"
"No, like," Mitsuri awkwardly smiled. "their . . the poison is gone. It's long gone by this point."
What?
Now Sanemi tilted his head.
"Long gone?"
"Didn't Shinobu tell you that the normal life-span is two weeks? For her, it was different, because her body's more prone to poisons, that's why it lasted so long."
"Um, I'm pretty sure she just told me to keep kissing them until it went away."
"Wait, so . . she didn’t tell you it’s gone already? ‘Cause it’s supposed to take max two weeks for them to recover . ."
"Excuse me? Did she tell you?"
"I was there when she was checking everyone, she said it was out of all their systems,"
"What the fuck . . ."
"Oh my god, nobody told you? Have you just been kissing them?"
"I am going to find Shinobu right now and ask her about this shit," Sanemi stood up with a wicked smile.
"Wait! I'm coming! There has to be an explanation for this!"
Shinobu was sitting in a room full of flasks and research material, but was still kept tidy. The door was open, showing she was available..
"Kochou Shinobu," Sanemi stood in the doorway menacingly. Mitsuri soon popped up behind him with an anxious look.
"What?" She didn't even turn around.
"Listen to me closely," Sanemi then sat down behind her. "are they all cured? Tomioka, Iguro, Uzui, Rengoku—they're not poisoned anymore?"
Shinobu slowly turned around with a slightly raised eyebrow and a pensive expression. Mitsuri was sweating.
" . . It's been three weeks. Of course they're cured. Why do you ask . . ?"
Sanemi took a deep breath. He repressed his incredible urges to scream into the nearest pillow, and spoke in the quietest voice possible, resulting in a whisper-scream, in which he emphasized every single word.
"Absolutely nobody told me that!"
"I told Master Ubuyashiki to tell you your mission would last two weeks. That's not possible."
"Are you sure he said exactly that??" Mitsuri suggested.
"Let's try to remember, Sanemi," Shinobu and Sanemi took a deep breath together and racked their brains. Shinobu started scratching at her hair.
"Aagh! I do not remember being told two weeks at all!!"
"What did he say then!? Did he say anything!?" cried Mitsuri.
"I think . . I think he said to just do it until the poison naturally goes away . . that's all I can fuckin' remember!"
"I think so too, I don't remember him saying two weeks. You're shittin' me," Shinobu muttered.
"So . . so none of the boys told you?!"
Sanemi and Shinobu looked at her, both with their mouths agape. They had come to a most interesting realization.
"You're absolutely right, Mitsuri . . . I think . . I think I am going to call a meeting with them."