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There is one thing that Dick is certain of: Bruce and Clark should be together.
He is also sure he can convince his siblings to see the same and even help him. They were all together during the holidays, they all have seen exactly the same scenes develop in front of them. How has it even started, you question. Well, for Dick it was more than 10 years ago, when he has just became Robin and he was finally presented to Superman, whom Bruce was still suspicious of, but eventually they have become friends. Close friends.
At first, Dick thought it was just his childish desires of wanting both of them to be his fathers, who would not like that? He remembers how the three of them fight crime together more than once; how he had run away more than once to sleep at Clark’s when he fought with Bruce; how he had discovered to whom he should ask help in certain situations and which one would help to appease the other and help him to expose his opinions on the matter, all this more than once. Dick remembers calling Clark Pa when he was sick and how it only has made him smile gently at him. There is even a moment Dick does not know for sure if it was a fever dream, an hallucination or it really happened, he asked if Clark would also be his father; he does not remember the answer and had never been brave enough to question if it was real. Dick can only say that after that he really thought Clark and Bruce would be together, he started to notice the little things between them; how they knew things; how they brought little treats or coffee the way they liked; how they spoke and how they looked at each other.
Dick also knows why he has never brought this matter up with any of his siblings. He remembers once when he first started to feel something for Kory and did not know how to deal with it and went to Clark’s apartment. In his mind Bruce was the one who could related better, feeling what he was feeling towards an alien and all, but Dick also knew that Bruce was not one to speak freely about his feelings and Clark would be better at it. It just made sense that Bruce would be too stubborn and Clark was the one who talked about them first, and that was why speaking with him just made sense.
He remembers climbing to the small balcony from Clark’s apartment and pondering if he should just enter through the bedroom window and climb on Clark’s bed as he has done thousands of times before, it was late and he would probably be there already if there was no world crisis (which he remembered checking and there was none). Then, he saw the kitchen light was on behind the balcony curtains and it made him stop and listen. He listened to Clark’s voice telling a funny story he had told him earlier that week, he remembers approaching the small open gap from the curtains and trying to see who else was there, but he listened to it first. The woman laughed and commented something funny back, then she teased Clark and called him Smallville. Only after Clark calling her name in an affectionate tone is that Dick could see both of them preparing food in the kitchen. He felt his blood running through his ears and he not hearing anything anymore, just watching their happy faces until Clark suddenly stopped and turned without bating an eye to Dick’s direction. He clearly used his super speed to wash his hands and reach the balcony in less than a second and all Dick could think is that the woman also knew who Clark is (or maybe he was too shocked to notice Clark moving, it was also possible).
— Come here, kitten — Clark called him as he extended his hand.
The nickname made him want to run away because it made him remember when Clark started calling him that because he kept climbing on him while pretending to practice his moves and Clark told him he looked like the cat that had clung on him the day before.
Dick could not escape, not only because Superman could run way faster than him, but because he also wanted to cling on Clark again. He knew he was thirteen now and that was childish, but he has always done it for comfort and it is hard to change, even more when Clark never complained and is ready to hug and comfort him. He grabbed his hand and let Clark bring him inside, he avoided looking on the woman’s direction and after Clark had closed the door behind then, he took the chance to grab on his shirt with his free hand.
— Have you fought? — Clark’s voice was serene as he started to caress his hair, after Dick shook his head, Clark only question was: — Does your dad know you’re here?
Clark always had spoken about Bruce as his father, but at the moment it felt he was also saying Clark was not and he should be with Bruce, not him.
— I’ll just call him to say where you are, okay? — Clark reassured him as he stepped further into the room, as Dick had not let him go, he went with him as he said:
— I’ll go back.
Clark must have seen him looking at the woman and trying to be discrete, because the next thing he did was turn to her and tell him:
— This is Lois, we’re making food.
He listened to him introducing Dick to her and the understanding expression appeared on her face, then a friendly smile as she asked him if he liked spaghetti and how it would be the most complicated food she could make instead of eating from a can. She kept on being friendly and even started to speak about herself and from where she had met Clark, when she mentioned the Daily Planet an unnamed feeling made Dick state:
— I know. — She looked surprised at him, maybe even confused and he kept rambling: — Lois Lane, 22, reporter from the Daily Planet whose recently won a Pulitzer for… — He just stopped speaking because of the way she was looking at him. A mix of confusion, anger and curiosity. Clearly the last bit won her internal battle as all she asked was:
— Does Batman have a folder with everyone’s information? Or just in special cases?
— This is confidential.
Unfortunately, what she said next was just the start of Dick beginning to like her, to his complete distress.
— Not so much, as you’ve just told me you know everything about me, huh?
Probably trying to lighten the mood, as Clark places Dick on a high stool in the kitchen island, he said:
— I’m sure it’s not personal, they probably also have something about me.
— Of course — Dick confirmed.
— With all his super-powers? His fighting styles and even how he got his ass kicked last week?
— Lois! He’s a child!
— A child who fights crime, I’m sure he has listened worse than ass.
— Lois — Clark tried to reprimand her as he also tried to cover Dick’s ears, and again he only had another reason to keep liking Lois as they both started to tease him about bad words.
— I’ve even heard the F-word.
— What F-word? — Lois played dumb as Clark seemed close to passing out.
— Fudge, of course.
— Ah, I like darn better.
— Oh, shut the front door, I’d rather…
— Seriously, Dick? Your father will not let you visit me anymore if you keep speaking like that — Clark interrupted their playful exchange, but Lois had not finished as she added:
— This is what I call a son of a biscuit, telling on you to your father.
— Stop teaching him more.
As Lois laughed over Clark’s reaction and the two of them were distracted, Dick took a deep breath and tried to not think much as how Clark kept setting up their boundaries and the only thing left was saying he was no one’s father to Dick’s face.
While Clark waited for Bruce to answer his phone and say where Dick was, he also took over whatever Lois was cooking on the stove as he and Lois started to eat some cookies and she confided to him Clark only made them after she promised to not eat it all.
— I think he’d take you some, but you’re here, so…
She started questioning him about school and how his new team was going and he almost mentioned Kory to her until he noticed he was speaking too much. Fortunately, Clark’s voice tone caught their attention and he could stop speaking. Whatever he was speaking with Bruce before could have not been good, as Clark just walked away from the stove and it made Lois rush there and Dick observed his back as he could listen to the low whispers and the rushed tone.
— No, there’s no need… I know, I know… Seriously, Bruce? Fine! I’ll take him home… Yes, tonight, don’t worry. There’s no need to make Alfred drive the whole way here.
When Clark walked back, his smile was in place and he cheerfully told Dick:
— You can stay for dinner.
Dick wanted to pry, to ask what they had talked about and why were they fighting. Slowly it was all taking Dick to discover something he did not wanted to, so he just kept quiet.
After helping Clark with the dishes, when he was drying his hands, Clark knelt in front of him before saying:
— You should probably text me next time you come over. I’m moving soon, so I may not be here, okay?
— Moving? Why? Don’t you like living here? I like it. — Clark smiled and held his hands before stating he also liked it, but it was getting small. — If you want space you can come home with me, it’s very big, you can even have my room, I’m staying a lot in the Tower and…
— It’s in Gotham, it’s very far away from the Daily Planet, don’t you think?
— You’re fast.
— But not Lois.
Dick got quiet, the look of betrayal clear exposed on his face as Clark kept speaking quietly that they were looking for a place for both of them and that he would always let an open window for him and…
— Pa…
His voice cracked, he could not say anything else as he started to cry like a baby before Clark hugged him tight. Probably even worse and he is not really sure to this day what he had said exactly or even if his muffled words were understood, but he knows he said something about him marrying someone else, and having a baby and also something related to Clark not liking him anymore. And the only reason he knows he had said anything related to that is because Clark reassured him:
— Of course I’ll still like you.
Then, his cry lowered a bit and he hid his face on Clark’s neck, he could listen to Clark stating no matter what he would still care for him and he would always have a place on his heart for him. When he suggested he could even arrange a room for Dick and he could go whenever he had a nightmare was that Dick spoke again:
— ‘m not a baby.
It made Clark smile and start teasing him and showering him with kisses while asking if he did not want to be his baby anymore. He also said Dick would always be his baby and all Dick could argue was that he was thirteen already. Dick remembers muttering something about not hating Lois and he was feeling like that probably due to puberty and it made Clark laugh and tease him again about his baby growing up. Dick did not say anything back because it was, indeed, very soothing when Clark hugged him like he was doing at the moment and he also liked that Clark would take him home. He also remembers that before Clark leaving him after putting him on bed, Dick made him promise he would not like him any less.
Clark leaned over him and kissed his forehead again before whispering:
— I love you, kitten, nothing can change that.
Instead of crying again, Dick made him pinkie promise.
Well it was all pretty clear that he was really suffering while passing through puberty and that hormones are no good. Why else would he have embarrassed himself like that that night? Besides having discovered being a teenager was awful, he also realized that him wishing Bruce and Clark would be together was just his childish dreams as both of them were seeing other people.
For god’s sake, Clark married someone else and right after Dick thought he would not have to deal with Talia’s presence in Gotham anymore (that after discovering Bruce and Clark were not a thing he realized why she and Bruce spent time alone), not even one year after she has left, and one week after what Dick like to call The Embarrassment Night, Dick had spotted Harvey Dent kissing his father and it was disgusting. He was not even Two Faces yet, but it disgusted him anyway. Why Bruce was always around people who eventually would have bad tendencies? At least Selina was quite decent if you do not count the stealing; Dick could understand when she maimed men, even when she has cut the hand of one of them and her defense was that the man had been doing nasty stuff with it, at least she was not in a League of Assassins of went around Gotham killing random people, or trying to have control over Gotham, or had any other nasty plan.
Maybe it was Bruce’s bad taste for not-so-romantic relationships the reason why him and Clark were never a thing; Or they were only friends the whole time.
However, Dick also remembers four years ago when he entered the Bat Cave and nor Bruce or Clark had spotted him and kept talking. Bruce was speaking about Tim and explaining why he wavered his decision of accepting him.
— He is twelve and discovered who I am, he also keep following me and it’s better if I teach him something useful before he ends up hurt.
— You’ve said the same when you started training Dick.
— Huh.
— I’m just not sure you’re able to deal with all of it alone, maybe you should call Dick and ask for help. It’s less than a year since…
He stopped speaking, but the three of them knew who Clark would speak about. Jason. And as usual, Bruce ignored that to not speak about how he feels and huffed before commenting:
— You should spend your time taking care of your family life, not mine.
They would usually bicker a little and change subject, but that time Clark only revealed:
— We divorced.
— Huh.
— Things were going to a place we weren’t happy about and it just happened.
— Huh.
— We decided to do it when we’re still friends and would be able to take care of Jon without fighting all the time and…
— It was not an invitation for you to speak about your problems.
Instead of being angry, Clark only smiled and commented that Bruce’s reassuring words were always effective, and kept speaking anyway. And Bruce even replied sometimes and even warned him to not fly around with Tim just as he has done with the first one and kept an overall friendly tone the whole time. Bruce had even talked about his fear of happening the same thing twice, he almost mentioned Jason’s name for the first time after his death, and he even commented this was the only reason he would allow Clark to keep listening to them; after prohibiting so many times before.
— I’ll do my best.
And in that few seconds they exchanged glances and Clark offered his pinkie with a smile, and Bruce accepted, Dick thought there was a possibility of him not being crazy and imagining things after all.
Two years after the divorce were too early, Dick has not done anything then; And it was the same year Talia appeared again and decided to announce her child with Bruce would spend some time with him. None of them even knew about Damian until that point; There was also the fact that Jason had also returned from death and became a gang leader, and they discovering he was Red Hood had not made things easier. The following two years was a merge of confusion and Dick was not always around, but he knew about the new Robins and Batgirl and until Jason could finally breath the same air around Bruce without them fighting took them to last Christmas; which he declared he was only present because Clark was doing his favorite pie (and it was only for him).
Christmas was a mess.
There was Bruce and Alfred, obviously, Dick, Jason (because of the pie he only ate after the gifts’ exchange), Tim, Damian, Stephanie and Cassandra. Dick invited Kory and Conner after they gave up having a team Christmas party with weird traditions they were choosing from different alien races in order to create their own holiday (after the raw meat eating competition and the dancing on fire, Dick knew things would only escalate further). It was also no surprise Clark was invited (not only to bring the pie) and his parents were also there, just as Lois and Jon. The house must have never been this filled with people without it being related to one of Brucie Wayne’s parties that involved a big number of Gotham’s crème de la crème and some other influential people; but there were never this much… family together.
It was such a mess and a confusing day that Dick started to think he was hallucinating again, mostly about Bruce and Clark.
As usual, Bruce was using one of the stupid presents he and his sibling like gifting him. He was wearing the light pink sweatpants that would be almost normal if not for when Bruce turned his back to his kids for the first time they all could read “batsy” written over his butt. By how hard Jason has laughed and Bruce has not shown any embarrassment (as he never does when using theirs gifts), it was his plan all along, he was even smiling lightly when watching Jason and the others laughing. However, the other important part of this pair of pants is that when Lois asked what was funny and Bruce turned to her to show it, Dick saw that while she started to laugh too, Clark only stared at him for some time.
Okay, it was just one look, Dick was clearly imagining things. That is what he thought until he listened to they both talking later when Bruce was using his “best grampa” mug.
— Is there something I should know? — Clark asked with a smile.
— The kids think Dick’s having a baby.
— Is he?
— He said it’s not biologically possible.
As Bruce watched the confusion in Clark’s face turn into understanding his smile got bigger. Clark kept staring at him and Bruce only stopped smiling when he noticed Dick looking on their direction. To pretend he was not just observing them, Dick complained:
— You should stop encouraging them with this nonsense.
To which Bruce questions:
— Should I stop helping them research how to make an artificial womb, too?
Dick almost passed out of embarrassment, not only because his father was engaging in his siblings teasing, or commenting about his sex life, but also because Kory approached him from behind and stated:
— Maybe we should just try harder.
And she kissed his head and walked away as if it was nothing.
— I look forward for my first grandchild.
Dick mumbled something that Bruce would probably have another one before him and then said he could use the womb first; to which he was unbothered and only looked away when Talia arrived in the room with a baby snake and a new set of knives for Damian.
— Oh, are you trying to set me up? — Bruce teased.
As Dick had nothing to say back, he walked away to greet her and probably find a way to remove the weapons and snake from the room before something dangerous happened. Then, Dick watched as Clark went after him and smoothly placed himself between Bruce and Talia, which made Dick keep watching them during the rest of the evening and Clark kept doing it without no one noticing, but he was not the only one, Dick could count at least three times he had seen Lois and Clark interacting and Bruce inserted himself on their conversation or asked Clark to do something that would make him get away from her.
To have a clear view on what had been happening, Dick needed a partial position on the case. Actually, a negative one. That was why he went for Jason who he knew would first call him crazy before accepting to analyze the situation with him. Unfortunately, after eating the whole pie alone, Jason left without sharing his final opinion. He even lost that when saying goodbye, Clark leaned on Bruce’s direction and whispered something to him. Maybe Dick should have asked for Conner’s opinion, at least he could have used his super hearing to help. After the failure in reaching a conclusion if he is being delusional again or not, Dick had only been at the Manor again in late January. Damian was back after spending his birthday with Talia and they were doing a small everything-you-can-eat birthday for Cassandra when, after devouring a jar of cookies (Dick is sure Jason had asked Clark to make because when he had stolen one earlier they tasted exactly like Clark’s), Jason said to all of them to hear:
— Dick’s right.
If he had not just explained again about Kory not being able to get him pregnant and that he does not have a uterus, Dick would not know what he was talking about. Of course he would never agree that Dick would not end up pregnant at some point, so he knew Jason was speaking about Clark and Bruce.
— And you’ve waited a whole month to tell me?
Then, he explained to Tim, Cassandra, Damian and Stephanie what they were talking about and the first to say something was Damian.
— But he doesn’t have ambiguous morals or is a complete lunatic.
No one could say otherwise, but only after Damian explaining these were the type of people Bruce has been with before is that Dick started to question himself about imagining things again.
— Maybe he has weird kinks — Tim suggested, which made Cassandra add:
— Maybe he has weird genitals.
— So he’s the one who’ll get the first man of the family pregnant.
If Jason has not just confessed they are a family, Dick would have tossed him on the ground.
— Maybe he’s the only one capable of overpowering Bruce and treating him like his bitch.
Stephanie had made all of them go quiet, Dick could not say if they were just contemplating her being right or it was shock and disgust. He knew that for him was the shock.
— Please, I’ve seen them being like that since before I kissed someone and thought holding hands already meant you were dating. Don’t put perverted images in my mind.
— So… yesterday? — Jason asked as if he was really considering it.
— Or you think I’ll get pregnant or that I don’t kiss.
— So they being gay around each other had been recurrent — Cassandra commented and the fact that neither she or the others have denied their relationship besides Damian thinking it would be a healthy relationship and it was not Bruce’s style, it just made Dick be more certain they should do something.
— Like what? Lock them in a closet?
— You act as if Clark could not break a door.
— Or Bruce open it with any tool he could find.
— We need more class.
— They could exchange Valentine’s cards — Damian suggested, already accepting that Bruce and Clark were, in fact, being gay around each other.
— I said more class, no more childish.
— Wait, that’s not a bad idea.
— Of course you’d think that, you only hold hands with your girlfriend and she’ll get you pregnant anyway.
— Jason, seriously.
— You mean, like a secret admirer? — Cassandra helps out, which makes Stephanie cheer:
— We can set a date for Valentine’s, they’ll have to confess then.
— We need to set a plan first, we have less than 20 days if we’re doing it.
They decided to start slow, first letting small treats to Bruce and Clark, such as coffee or candy. They first had done it with Clark, leaving a piece of expensive cake on his apartment just as they knew Bruce would do. After he arrived from work and saw the cake, Clark did not even bat an eye and sat happily to eat it as if it was something usual to happen. They tried doing the same for Bruce, but with the sweet coffee he pretends he does not like besides the bat computer. Strangely, Bruce also did not think it was weird and started to analyze the footage of his patrol while sipping on it calmly.
— Should we do something more evident? Leave a flowery note?
— Huh, not too flowery, Bruce would never.
And it led to them leaving the expensive chocolate Bruce bought once and offered a piece to Clark, who declared he would never be able to eat any other chocolate again after that one. It was no surprise after that there was always a bar around when Clark would appear, Bruce had hidden it almost perfectly that he was doing it for the reporter because the kids also liked it, but there was always at least a whole bar for Clark that was hidden from them. So when they convinced Conner to leave it there with a post it written “eat me” and a coffee with “drink me” (they remember they were talking about Alice not long ago and Bruce would never write a smiley face as Jason suggested). They even made Conner keep watching to report them each and every one of his reactions. According to him, Clark just laughed and not even questioned Lois if she had seen anyone leaving it there.
After getting Conner on board, because for some reason he thought they were planning to poison Superman (god knows why) and they had to explain what exactly they were doing, it got easier to leave the gifts without any of the two being around. After a week of treats and notes that went from smiley faces to sentences in which they complimented each other going from basic things they spoke to the kids without actually saying to one another to the most secretive things they have not spoken out loud; Bruce liking Clark’s hair; or Clark saying Bruce’s smile is pretty; or how Bruce enjoyed his horrible jokes; All the things the kids had noticed them expressing or showing without really realizing they were doing it.
— I have a feeling Clark likes when Bruce orders him around — Conner confided when he and Dick were trying to think about the next message.
— Even if it’s true, how could I simply write it?
— Saying he likes when he’s bossy?
— Clark would be more romantic.
Conner snorted and kept solving Dick’s sudoku’s book he had abandoned on his room in the manor. The others were patrolling or pretending to patrol and following Bruce around.
— I still think you should be doing the same.
— Please, I can watch him from here, and we don’t work together.
— He gave you a room in his house.
— Yeahyeahyeah, just ‘cause Kara wanted someone to take care of Krypto and he had Jon and the dog can be too much sometimes. Oh! He likes Bruce’s jokes too.
— He doesn’t joke around.
— Yes, he does. Around Clark. — As he notices Dick was not buying it, he questioned: — What about him getting nervous when Bruce fix his clothes? There was once I thought he would have a heart attack when Bruce was fixing his tie.
— Fine, this we can use. Ah, Bruce thinks Clark smell good… and he likes his hands, too.
— And this we can use? I’m sure Clark is way more perverted than Bruce and would mention something like that.
It is Dick’s turn to snort and tease:
— Because you share his DNA? Maybe all your pervertness comes from Lex Luthor, is not rare that his fights with Clark leave him with shredded clothes.
— Maybe you should stop looking at him with such devotion and notice how he looks at Bruce as if he would devour him.
— I really think you’ve hit your head too hard two weeks ago. You’re clearly talking about how you behave around Ti…
Before he can really say something, Conner start wrestling with him. It is not really the first time they have done it and he knows all his weak points and he will never refrain from using kryptonite to putting him on his place. Unfortunately, when they were rolling around and Dick could overpower him and they ended up on the bed, just before Conner could tried to revert their situation and get away from the kryptonite (that was already making him breathless) is when Tim opened the door. Their clothes being a chaotic mess because of all that rolling around were not really helpful, even more because Tim’s reaction was just to close the door after saying the others were coming back from patrol.
While Conner tripped (still dizzy from the kryptonite) after Tim and started to stutter while trying to explain what they were doing and it was not what it looked like, Dick picked the messy note he was supposed to write in Clark’s calligraphy and he had nothing better than “You are cute when you are bossy” with a smiling heart drawn there. Well, it should be good enough for that night.
After that note, which Dick could not deny was helpful as he even saw Bruce smile (at least Batman’s equivalent to a smile) while reading it, they finally started to make them exchange more romantic notes. Dick decided to choose making them the most stupid and clearly copied quote possible, wishing they would recognize it came from children’s books and movies when reading. Dick had watched Clark laughing after his and Bruce hiding his smile when pretending to cough. All this because when they got to quotes such as:
If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you.
From Winnie the Pooh, they still seemed to have fun with it, but their smiles had become more soft. And when they got to:
When I look at you, I can feel it. I look at you and I’m home.
From Finding Nemo, they have not laughed anymore.
— I can’t believe you date Kory being this stupid.
— I can’t believe you’ll carry her baby being this stupid.
— I can’t believe it actually worked.
— It’s the chocolate.
— It’s the flowers I chose.
— Please, they were ugly.
— They don’t die, not even Bruce would be able to.
— Don’t underestimate his ability of killing plants.
— I remember he killed a cactus for lack of water.
— You have to be joking.
— Me and the cactus buried in the Manor’s cemetery wished it was a joke.
— Let’s face the facts: they’re stupid for one another and we should take the chance to set up a date.
— For Valentine’s?
— It could not be more obvious for them.
— Would Bruce leave patrol, though?
— He laughed because of a corny quotation of Romeo and Juliet.
— He’d laugh about anything Clark said.
— Do you see it then?
— Fine, let’s set a date.
And after finally choosing a place, they planned how they would invite each other and if they should send romantic lines, if they should just make a joke and ask them to be their Valentine’s, or if they should just send the place and time and hope for the best.
— No, if we send flowers again, you’ll choose even uglier ones.
— They meant to not wither and everlasting, it’s good luck for them.
— Maybe you could try tulips next.
— Ah, they’re just not as cliche as roses, Bruce would never.
— But Clark definitely…
The seven of them go quiet when they realize who have spoken about tulips, slowly turning as they face Alfred behind them. Maybe they should have not met in the Manor’s Greenhouse, much less so close to the Orchidary.
— Oh, hi Alfred, what’s up?
The butler is not bothered to answer to that, or to pretend to fall for their terrible attempt to hide what they were doing there. As if the thousands of drafts splattered around them or their talk from before was not revealing enough.
— Tulips mean perfect or deep love, I supposed it could be what you were looking for.
They exchange glances, half confused why Alfred is not making questions and is helping them, and half really liking the idea.
— Yeah, tulips for both of them.
On the final day, as they were planning where and how to leave the tulips and the message, They all receive a text from Bruce in their family group chat, in which Conner had just been added to.
“Dinner at 8”
Dick’s first reaction was to ask Alfred if he was aware of anything, or why Bruce would call them, and all he offered was that Bruce had told him he would call the kids for dinner.
At night, when they all got together waiting for Bruce, they started to question what could have happened. It could have been a family dinner, but he added Conner to the list. It could be about a mission, but there was no rush and further information and they would meet at the Manor. And it all led them to the kitchen trying to gather information from Alfred, who also does not seem to know much, or is hiding it pretty well.
— You have to tell us, how we’re going to plan the defense? — Tim states.
— I’m not even his son, you have to take pity on me Alfie — Conner pleads, and it makes Jason scoff.
— You can just go home.
— And make him angrier? No, thank you.
— Maybe he just want to have dinner with us — Dick suggests.
— Why is Conner here, then? Has father been adopting more children that I’m not aware of? — Damian inquires and they start discussing that is possible Bruce has been adopting more kids.
— I haven’t adopted anyone.
All the kids scream in surprise and turn to see Bruce by the doorway.
— We should go eat — he speaks up again, as the others have not uttered a single word and only observed him. Bruce gesticulates to the dinning room and they do not move, he rises one eyebrow and sighs, being the first to move.
— Does he know?
— I think he does.
— How?
— Have you sold us out?
— Hey! It’d be very well paid, sure, but I also want to–
The kids stop talking when Bruce freezes in front of them. They soon notice why as they can see the flowers arranged by Bruce’s usual seat. They exchange glances and ask in whispers who has done it and why have they not used the tulips as it was chosen the last meeting, but they go quiet again when Bruce turns and show them a murderous look.
— Seriously? You’re still insisting on that? I thought we could talk rationally about it without more tricks.
— At least we know for sure that he knows.
— You’re not helpful.
— What’s not helpful is the ugly flowers.
— You’re ugly.
— So you’ve picked them?
— No way, I’d choose roses.
— Seriously? That’s why you’ll die alone.
— Could you stop arguing between yourselves and explain? — Bruce interrupts.
— They’re not ugly — someone defends the poor flowers even with Bruce’s requests, and it makes the bat take a deep breath.
— Of course you’d say that, you told me Jason was not ugly as a child.
— Hey!
However, before Dick and Jason start arguing and even using their fists, they finally realized who had spoken and they all go quiet again. They stare from Bruce to Clark, and from Clark to Bruce. The alien only smiles shyly and not uncomfortable with the situation at all, in fact, he speaks up again:
— They’re Metrosideros polymorpha, or ‘Ohi’a lehua, they from Hawaiian mythology about two lovers. They were separated by a goddess’ jealousy who transformed one of them in a tree, but she regretted it and as she could not undo her curse, she transformed the other in a flower. It’s said that when the flower is taken away, it rains and it’s the sky representing the lovers tears for being separated again.
— And you took it anyway? — Jason questions.
— You seem to be wanting something that represented love, but not the traditional ones.
— Does he also knows?
— What do you think, dumbass?
— Language.
Taking advantage the kids are arguing between themselves again, Clark approaches Bruce, who is staring at him.
— You’re engaging on their…
— They grow close to volcanoes — Clark interrupts Bruce, still talking about the flowers. Bruce looks at them again as the alien adds: — they’re very resistant. — Bruce frowns, and sighs.
— How long have you known?
— About their plan, or…?
Bruce raises an eyebrow, in a silent question. Or…?
— The coffee was normal, but they’ve put a sticker with a smiley face.
— I told you the smile was a bad idea.
— Shhh!
Luckily, the two of them decide to ignore the kids as they keep focused on their conversation.
— How long have you known? — Clark inquires, but Bruce says nothing, he does not even look at Clark and the alien has a pretty good guess why is that. — They’re pretty good at copying your handwriting on the notes, probably because of the fake signatures over the years. — They hear the kids starting to protest, but shushing themselves to let Clark keep speaking. — However, I know you’ve noticed it wasn’t mine on yours. — Bruce still does not say anything — Could you look at me for a bit? — He looks on Clark’s direction, focusing on a spot on his shoulder.
— You’ve let them keep this up, knowing what they wanted with it, and…
— Ah, this remind me. I haven’t had time to write a note, can I borrow yours? — Clark asks looking at the kids, they are still observing their conversation with interest and without thinking much, Dick hands Clark the note. — Thank you. Here. This is for you. — The alien gives it to Bruce, who is frowning again.
— Are you seriously going to keep this up?
— You still haven’t looked to me, though. Also, I thought it was pretty harmless, it was just cute notes and you seemed to be having fun. — Bruce grunts at the accusation, torn between telling him he also knew it was fake or letting them think he really believed on their exchange. To have more time to think, Bruce focuses on the note and opens it to read: — Would you be my Valentine? — Clark whispers, and hears when Bruce heartbeat increases for a second before he can steadies it again. — I think we’ve let them keep this up for the same reason. What do you say?
Bruce takes a deep breath, then finally raises his eyes to meet Clark’s who smiles brightly. Before the kids can breath lighthearted, though, he states:
— You’re still grounded.
The unison groaning and commentaries of some of them not even being his children are enough to muffle and distract them from when Bruce offers Clark a half smile and his heartbeat increases again. The alien has no other option besides lean for a kiss and this seems to be enough for the kids to start cheering and celebrating, forgetting their punishment for now.
As the kids sit happily to eat and Clark offers to help Alfred, Bruce says:
— Enjoy your dinner, I have patrol.
— You calling it that?
Bruce seriously looks confused at Jason’s question, and when Clark appears again with Alfred and the food, Bruce seems to have decided to ignore his son and announces:
— I’ll be leaving for patrol.
Clark nods and it finally seem to sink in the kids mind.
— Wait, you’re really going on patrol?
— It’s not code for sex?
— Thank you, Jesus, I’d never not be disgusted in patrol if it was.
Bruce let the kids keep grumbling and making more stupid commentary while he only gesticulates for Clark to sit, the alien offers to accompany him, but Bruce says he has to eat first.
— Have you eaten?
— Yes.
— Will you call if you need?
— Yes.
— Are you really lying at my face?
The question makes Bruce smile, he can not avoid it, but instead of denying, he only accuses:
— As if you’d not be listening.
— As we’ve just stated, it’s necessary.
— You’ve just got together and you’re leaving for patrol? — Jason asks again, to which Bruce states:
— We’re not together. — Jason seems too close to having a heart attack, he even stands and starts rambling about him being stupid for denying what is in front of him and before he can keep talking about their love and relationship, Bruce says: — I thought we had an agreement. I have a date tomorrow and you’ll be on patrol instead. Or should I cancel?
— No!
— Very well, I’ll be leaving. Alfred is in charge.
Right after Bruce leaves the room and Dick turns for Conner to ask if he is gone, the kids turn to Clark.
— Are you really letting him leave like that?
Clark smiles and keep helping Alfred to put the food on the table, just then he says they will have a date tomorrow.
— Or are you really that sad we’re not engaging in… what have you called it? Patrol together tonight? — Some groan and complain about traumatizing them again and that they should get a room. — As we’ve both said: we’re meeting tomorrow.
— And you confess you’re banging our father in front of us. You should keep it private.
Clark smirks, and let them keep complaining and making rules, even saying Clark can not get Bruce pregnant before Dick has his own.
— Seriously? This again?
Well, it is not as if Clark had thought that after all this trouble and meddling it would just calm down. In the middle of dinner, though, he listens to his name being called and excuses himself out after ordering them to take care of the dishes.
— I’ve never noticed he always acts as if he’s our father already.
— Really? He was in our contact information on school, he’s still in Damian’s.
— He took me home last week after I’ve been wrongly sent home — Damian agrees. — Father was in a meeting, but we have eaten out afterwards.
— You three?
— Of course.
— Jesus, he’s really already in the family.
— Hey, let’s talk seriously for a sec, what are the chances of Clark having left to meet Bruce and not to save someone now?
— What has he said when he left?
— He only ordered us to clean up.
— Ugh, for all we know they’re fucking now.
— Seriously, I could live without it on my mind, thank you.
— You’re welcome.