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Stiles breathes softly in his sleep and Derek can’t stay in bed any longer. He pulls on his boxer briefs and crosses the room to stare out over the Preserve.
For so long Derek’s wanted Stiles, waited for him. When they met, Stiles was only a teen with so much pressure on him. As much as he needed Stiles in his life, Derek had vowed to never take advantage of him.
After his time with Kate and the realization of what she had done, Derek knew he could never treat anyone the way he had been treated. He also knew that he never wanted to trust his heart to someone who could so easily break it. Then he met Stiles and it happened without him realizing. He never blamed Stiles for not being able to give Derek what he needed. He was only a teenager after all and Derek would wait.
Now the wait was over. Stiles was in his bed, and from what had been said, he had no intention of leaving it anytime soon. Derek wanted to cling to him but at the same time he wanted to run as far as he could.
“Derek?”
He hears his name as he feels the atmosphere in the room change. Derek turns to see Stiles standing before him.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” Derek says quietly. “Go back to bed.”
“Only if you join me,” Stiles says, voice just as quiet. He touches Derek’s naked chest. “Please.”
Derek nods absently. He drags his thumb over Stiles’ lips before he fits their mouths together.
“Stop, stop,” Stiles’ mutters after a moment. He pulls away reluctantly and stares into Derek’s face. “Something’s wrong.”
“I don’t want to ever hurt you,” Derek says. He doesn’t even bother to deny Stiles’ words.
“You won’t.”
“You can’t know that, Stiles.” Derek sits on the window sill, opening his legs when Stiles moves closer.
“I know you,” Stiles whispers. “I’ve known you all these years and I trust you. You won’t hurt me.”
“I’m broken. I’m bitter.” Derek cups Stiles’ hip, pulling him closer unconsciously. “You deserve better than me. Than this.”
Stiles tenses. He steps back and bends to snatch up his own boxers, pulling them on angrily. “Don’t bullshit me, Derek.”
“I’m not. You know it’s true.” Derek stands, crossing his arms over his chest.
“You lied to me a long time ago and I’m not going to let you do it again.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“That night in the pool, you told me that you didn’t trust me.” Stiles takes a deep breath and sits heavily on the end of the bed. “You did trust me. Even if you didn’t know it yet. You came to my house to hide, Derek! From the Sheriff, even when you knew he was home. Why would you risk yourself like that?”
“I knew you wouldn’t sell me out,” Derek says quietly, slumping back on to the window’s edge. He can’t even meet Stiles’ eyes as he speaks.
“But why?” Stiles grits out. “If you didn’t trust me, why would you do that?”
Derek finally looks up, seeing the emotion in Stiles’ face. “I trusted your loyalty. I knew you wouldn’t give me up. You and Scott both knew how badly you’d fucked up when you told your dad it was me.”
Stiles sighs, his shoulders slumped. “For so long I tried to work out why you’d come to me. I could never understand why.”
“You represented safety. You home was exactly that, a home, not a house.”
“And you were drawn to that?”
“My wolf needed it.” Derek drags a hand over his face. “Why are we doing this, Stiles?”
“This conversation, or us?”
Derek raises an eyebrow. “Both.”
“This, whatever is between us, has been coming for a long time. Surely you know that.”
Derek nods silently.
“Why did we wait so long?”
“Kate.”
Stiles rolls his eyes. “I’m sick to death of hearing her name.”
“You think I’m not?” Derek growls. His eyes flash red for the barest of moments before he calms himself.
“She affected so much of your life, Derek. Please don’t let her be part of our relationship.”
“She’s part of my history.”
Stiles drops to his knees before him, hands on Derek’s thighs. “That’s right, she’s your history. Your past. Please don’t let her be your present, your future.”
Derek draws a fingertip along Stiles’ cheek and jaw. “Our future.”
“You’re not Kate. If that’s what this is about, you have to believe me, you are not her. I know you’ve waited. As much as I wanted to push you to make something happen, I knew I was risking breaking you if I did get what I want.”
“You wanted this? Back then.”
Stiles smiles fondly. “Yes. Always yes.”
“She nearly did break me, Stiles.”
“I know,” Stiles breathes as he leans into Derek’s hand.
“You would have broken me. You still could.”
Stiles’ eyes widen. “I wouldn’t,” he whispers.
“I know you would never intentionally do it.” Derek leans down to kiss Stiles’ temple. “Sometimes things happen. Sometimes people leave.”
“No,” Stiles says firmly. He stands and cups Derek’s face with both hands. “Not that. Never.”
“I feel like I’ve been holding my breath, waiting for you.”
“I’ve always been here, haven’t I? You and I, we understand things that other people don’t.”
“Sometimes you just need a minute to breathe.”
Stiles nods. “See. We’ve both lost people we love. My dad, you, Scott. I can’t lose you guys. I won’t lose someone else I love.”
Derek’s breath hitches. “You...”
“Of course I do,” Stiles says, rolling his eyes. “You didn’t know that?”
“You love all of us, Stiles. We know that. You’re the most wolf like human I’ve ever met. You’ve always made sure the Pack knew how you felt.”
“It’s different with you,” Stiles whispers. “Let’s go to bed.”
Derek stands, taking Stiles’ hand. He pulls him in close and inhales his scent.
“I’ll never get sick of you doing that,” Stiles murmurs. He cups Derek’s nape and holds his face to his throat.
Derek presses a kiss to the heated skin and feels his teeth descend.
Stiles gasps when the tip of Derek’s fangs touch his throat. “Do it.”
“What?” Derek pulls back, staring hard at him.
“I want it,” Stiles says simply.
“No. You never wanted it.” Derek forces the Alpha back and takes a deep breath.
“I wasn’t ready when I said that. I am now. I’ve been over this so many times. I don’t want to leave you.”
Derek bites his lip, eyes only just held in check. “Don’t do this just for me.”
“I’m not. I’m doing this because I want it. For me. For my dad, so I can protect him. For you, so I can support you. Trust me.”
“Stiles...”
“Please, Derek.” He tips his head back a little. “I want it to be you.”
Derek listens hard, and inhales deeply. No lying. No fear. Just a steady heart beat and the normal scent of Stiles. The wolf, the Alpha in him preens and gives in to the thing he’s most wanted but never acknowledged. The need for Stiles as a mate. A werewolf mate.
“Derek,” Stiles breathes.
The word only just leaves Stiles’ mouth before Derek is on him. He pushes him backwards on to the bed, and kneels over him. The desperate need to taste Stiles is overpowering, and he takes his time to kiss him, long and deep until they’re both moaning. Derek pulls away and touches his hand to Stiles throat, he follows the drag on his fingers from Stiles’ throat to his chest with his mouth, placing kisses in a direct line to his heart.
Stiles whines softly and tangles his fingers in Derek’s hair.
Derek freezes for a moment, listening and scenting. His senses reassure him that this is what Stiles wants. What he needs. He chooses to trust that, trust in them.
He bites down, and claims everything he needs.
Stiles throws his head back and moans, eyes closing before they open, bright and warm. Beta’s eyes.
There in the dark, Derek cherishes the moonlight. His wolf roars proudly, joined by his mate.