Work Text:
007n7 the general of the C00LKIDD army had a lot on his plate. He had three major problems.
First of all his minions somehow managed to destroy a whole bunch of high tech equipment during a recent battle against the admins. Second of all the meetings he attended didn't go quite as planned because of a certain someone. Third of all that certain person is the anomaly that goes by the name Noli who has been pestering 007n7 ever since they met.
007n7 let out a sigh of frustration. Could that stupid jester ever leave him alone? He does bring a lot of value onto the battlefield but otherwise he really is a pest.
"Nothing i can do about that" seven grumbles. "Unless..."
Suddenly a marvelous idea came to mind. What if he can figure out Noli's fixation on him. With that information then he could change that part of him that noli is so obsessed with therefore causing the jester to lose interest in him! It was truly a perfect idea. All that was left was to execute it.
Seven stares down at the pile of paperwork he needs to finish. This is going to be a long evening. As he picked up his pen to write he gets interrupted by a call. With a swipe of his C00lGUI he is met with the face of the one he despise the most.
"HEYA SEVY! Whatcha doing?" Noli's cheery voice is the worst thing to ever hear after a terrible week.
"I think it's quite clear on what I'm currently doing. What is the purpose of this sudden call?"
Noli stares blankly it's almost as if he's thinking then responds "I thought Aspex sent you my letter?" The jester tilts his head. " ASPEX!!! WHAT HAPPENED TO THE LETTER I TOLD YOU TO DELIVER?". Noli screamed off camera.
Seven can already assume what letter he's referring to. He recalls when C00LKIDD 75 brought a letter covered in glitter and crayons. He assumed it was made by some child so he immediately tossed it in the trash. Once Noli finished lecturing Aspex who did nothing wrong he faces the camera once again to seven demise.
"Since Aspex did not deliver my important message to you I'll bless you with visit from the one...the only.... NOLI!!".
Seven grimaced at the thought that he'd have to see this brightly dressed jester.
"This meeting we shall be having better be worth my time". And with that he swiped against the C00lGUI to end that horrendous call.
Seven decided he had enough of this torture and went straight to bed dreading of the day ahead. Much to seven's dismay he barely got any sleep last night. The thought about all paperwork and up coming meetings forced his mind to come up with ideas of what he should do next. Seven decides that he deserves to get a little fresh air after all the work he did the other day. So he opens his office door and heads outside to see what his minions are up to.
"God is it always so bright outside?" Seven groans.
He glances around the base. It's been quite busy around here ever since the war started, Seven barely got time to wander the town of Robloxia. He never went outside because he uses his C00lGUI for majority his meetings.
After being pestered by multiple of his minions he decides maybe it's best to go back to work.
Seated at his desk he uses his C00lGUI to spawn a pen out of thin air. Seven stares at the massive paperwork he has to complete.
"I swear this pile keeps on getting bigger." Seven whispers.
After hours of writing and calling multiple of his minions to his office, Seven realizes that Noli hasn't came at all. This has to be the best thing to happen to him all week. He can't help but smile at the thought of not seeing that clown. It's been a whole day without being pestered by him!
"TADAA! THE ONE THE ONLY....NOLI!" Confetti goes off and ruins 007n7's office.
Seven shouldn't have jinxed himself. Noli's bells jingle indicating to Seven that he is approaching. While Noli is approaching, Seven comes to the realization that this could be the perfect time to execute his devious plan.
"Noli, would you care to have a drink with me?" This causes Noli to stop in his tracks.
"A drink? What kind?" Noli asks curiously.
"I can have my minions bring you whatever you desire at this moment."
This is perfect, Seven can make Noli get drunk and then ask him what he enjoys so much about him. Seven will obviously not be drinking otherwise he will ruin his own plan and say some unnecessary information. He's always couldn't handle alcohol.
"WOW! that's so kind of you to offer!! I'll take whatever vodka you have!" Noli says excitedly.
Seven spawns his C00lGUI out of thin air to send a message to some of his trusty minions so that he can request them to bring the strongest vodka they can find.
"So Noli what did you come over to discuss about?"
"Oh right! I wanted to speak to you about an up coming battle. My presence there will be crucial for it to be a success right?"
"I suppose so."
"Well I wanted to ask some more of my allies if they will be able to join this fight against the admins."
"I don't see why not. The more help I can get makes me have a better chance of getting rid of those admins once and for all."
"AHEM. I think you meant to say WE! We are in this together right?"
"OH, well yes of course."
Seven almost messed up there. Before the conversation can continue any further there's a sudden knock at his office door.
"Come in."
C00LKIDD 56 and 97 brought what seven had requested earlier. Seven takes the drink and dismisses them both in a hurry.
"Allow me to pour for you Noli. After all you are a guest here."
Noli grins and waits eagerly as Seven pours him a glass. It's only a matter of time before Noli starts to crack and give the information Seven desperately needs.
"How very sweet of you Sevvy! This has to be the first time you've ever done something as kind as this!"
"Don't get used to it" Seven retorts.
After multiple drinks and more discussions about the upcoming battle, Noli finally cracks. He starts babbling about useless information that holds no value to Seven whatsoever. This is the perfect time to strike.
"So Noli what do you adore about me so much?"
Noli pauses before giggling. He plops himself onto the general's lap and whispers into his ear.
"Wow I never took you to be such a forward person"
Noli tightens his grip around Seven. Seven is really confused. His first instinct is to listen to what the hell Noli is yakking about.
"Well sevvy, I just about adore everything about you. I love how serious you are, I love your pink glasses, I love how you can get so devious and I LOVE your massive-".
Seven stands up causing Noli to fall face flat on the floor.
"I'm going to have to stop you right there."
"Hm? What whyyyyyyy" Noli whines.
"YOU WERE ABOUT TO SAY YOU LOVE MY MASSIVE DICK!"
"What? Oh Seven you dirty pervert~! I was going to say how I LOVE your massive army!"
Noli begins to roll on the ground laughing his head off. Seven on the other hand is blushing profusely. Never in his life has he ever been embarrassed this much.
"Whatever. I believe this meeting has been quite successful" that was a lie.
"I agree! We should do this more often Sevvy!" Noli slurs.
Seven's plan took an unexpected turn. To get Noli to stop being such a nuisance he's going to have to change everything about him which is near to impossible! There's got to be another way. Until then Seven ushers Noli to get out of his office and head home.