Work Text:
It was a late night. 02:29 AM.
The lampposts of the road were turned off, so instead of pure black, the sky was a greyed out blue sapphire shade, devoid of clouds and littered with stars from far, far away. The full moon hovered above the clear sky like an observer. An observer currently witnessing a studious boy on his desk, stressing over.. 8th-grader math.
Kageyama Ritsu held a basic blue ballpoint pen, tapping its chewed end rhythmically against the surface of his math textbook as he thought. It formed a barely noticeable dent on the fragile, dry paper that made him have to use hand cream every once in a while during long study sessions.
The brain of the teenager was wasted away. All of those consecutive, sleepless nights were genuinely making Ritsu mad. He wanted to flip his math teacher off, flip the student council off, and then proceed to hit his head against a hard concrete wall. See, it even somewhat rhymed. It was meant to be. Or maybe it didn't rhyme and Ritsu was as crazy as a coconut right now. Oh, well.
Hm... the square root of 237? .. How was it again?
Ritsu usually lacked in mental agility when he was sleep deprived. And right now? He's missing hours and hours of sleep, a tax that kept building up with the long weeks of staying up late to keep up with extracurricular classes and homework and student council duty and–
Sigh.
I'm tired. If I see one, and I mean ONE more number or shape, I swear I'll—
Ritsu stopped himself from having a breakdown. Relax. Take it easy. It's not as bad as you think. It's okay, you're okay. Your teacher's a... a no-good degenerate, but hey. You're better than this.
Though, the same was already imagining a scenario in his head where he just spammed middle finger emojis in the classroom groupchat.
Ritsu moved on to the next page. He read the question imprinted on this miserable piece of paper aloud, muttering under his breath. He made sure his voice wouldn't cut violently through the usual silence of the night. "The following figure shows a rhombus, whose shorter diagonal measures 4 centimeters. The length of a side of this rhom—" No. Next question. ... "In the figure below, ABCD represents a square, and ABE represents an equilateral triangle. The measure of angle A is:"... No. Fuck you. No. I will NOT. Waste my precious time, doing a stupid, silly, geometry question."
...
"But this homework is due tomorrow."
...
"...uuUuUuUUUUGHH." Ritsu dropped his face onto his textbook, like he officially gave up on his excellent yet high-maintenance academic reputation. "Being fourteen sucks. ... I'm acting like an average student instead of the literal vice-president of the student council." He mumbled, practically spitting the words out as if he was distasted by his behavior. And he was. Deeply.
After a second or two of sulking, he turned his head to the side to be able to breathe properly without the weight of his own head pressing against his nose. His gaze was fixed on a random spot on his study desk, spiraling into thought like he always did when he was too tired to think straight.
His eyes were dull and aching from prolonged exposure to bright artificial lights, one of them twitching as if to beg for a break. His jaw was tense with annoyance.
...
A simple, seemingly boring planner sat midst various other books on Ritsu's shelf, blending in with ease.
... Huh. Why not.
That wasn't really used as a planner, no. Ritsu used the object as a journal. His hand reached out and grabbed it, flipping it open and skimming through multiple of his entries before spotting a blank page. He picked up his blue pen and started writing.
"School kinda sucks." Ritsu paused, and continued. "It's not like I hate it. The student council, the teachers, my classmates, my parents... all of them can count on me. I'm reliable, people trust me. It feels nice, but that's the problem. It gives me a huge sense of responsibility." He put his pen down and stared at the page for a moment.
What more should he write? ... Right.
"All of them think I'm a genius. Some think that for me, it's as easy as child's play. When, in reality, they're making me feel exhausted merely by being perceived as particularly more intelligent than the others. I miss how I used to be proud of the praises when I was a child. Now it's just another burden on my back. A dead weight, frankly. I'm tired of hearing the same loop of words every single day."
...
"But there's a person that doesn't see me that way."
KNOCK KNOCK!
Ritsu's entire body jolted up with a slight delay, the hand that held the pen accidentally making an irregular stroke on the page. He actually almost fell out of his chair, but instinctively held the table with both hands and a small yelp. His brows furrowed and his gaze darted towards the glass door to the balcony.
Tsc. Shit, Suzuki.
Ritsu got up from his chair, and slid his curtains open.
And there was no one else here other than... Suzuki Shou.
His electrifying blue eyes sent small goosebumps down Ritsu's skin every time he looked too deeply at him. His pale skin had so many freckles, it was like someone sprinkled cocoa powder all over him. Ritsu had already memorized where each mole of his was located without even trying. His ridiculous ginger hair stood on end, like usual. Everything about him was ridiculous.
And yet, Suzuki had a tendency to stay rent-free way too long inside of Ritsu's brain. He was invasive without even knowing.
Among Ritsu's rather irrelevant small friend group, Shou was the flicker of life, the breath of fresh air, the burning fire amidst the cold winter. The opportunity Ritsu had of acting like a teenager instead of a pre-well adjusted adult. Intriguing.
But what the hell is he doing here? He knows I have school tomorrow. What a bother.
"Yo, Ritsu! Sooooo... Got bored." Shou started. "Or rather... Had my usual insomnia. And you know it sucks to spend the night alone when you're wide awake. Nights when you're wide awake are nights worthy of hanging out, not pondering about life!" The boy shamelessly slid into Ritsu's room, looking around, comfortable like he was a guest told to make themselves at home. "Man, that room is still as boring as ever. Didn't I tell ya to put some posters on the walls?" His eyes, that rivaled the shimmering glow of a blue flame, locked onto Ritsu's desk. "Oooh, what is th–"
Ritsu immediately slammed the journ– cough cough, the planner shut with his telekinesis. Then, Shou tried to fight him. His orange, bubbly aura surrounded the small notebook, trying to force it open, but Ritsu was quick to also spread his aura through the object. They kept psychically wrestling for a few seconds before Ritsu lost the battle.
Shou giggled triumphantly, and picked the journal up, opening on a random page before Ritsu could stop him.
"Wait, Suzu–"
"Today, the light of the sun was reflecting and shimmering on the river's surface, making my eyes hurt if I looked at it. But the setting star was as dark as the depths of the Mariana Trench compared to the boy standing right next to–"
Suzuki immediately dropped the thing to the floor. "Eeeeeugh. Ritsu, you didn't tell me you made mediocre love letters to your secret crushes here. Fuck no."
Ritsu maintained a deadpan expression, but on the inside he was screaming in sheer relief. If Suzuki had read that entire thing, he would willingly carve his own grave atleast a thousand leagues away from him. "First, it's a journal, not a diary. Second, I do not have any secret crushes. You're talking nonsense."
"Yeah, right. Yap all you want, because we, yes, we, know you probably put fake book covers on your BL manga. Let me guess, you read 'Ganbare Nakamura!!'?"
"... No?"
"Right. We can see you shaking, Ritsu."
"How do you even know any BL manga at all?! How does it have anything to do with secret crushes–"
"Hell is that, huh?" Suzuki pointed at the messy study desk. A math textbook open, some stationary neatly lined up and some forgotten, almost falling off the edge of the smooth wood. A bag of sweet chili Doritos, half-eaten, was hidden under the desk. "At 2 AM, for real? New way to spiral into madness slowly and painfully or something?" He shamelessly slammed a hand down on the thick textbook. "How about we replace that for a cool gaming PC?"
He completely avoided the question. Little shit.
"I don't have money for that." Ritsu crossed his arms and leaned his body weight against the wall, deadpan expression playing on his face.
"Oh, that's a shame. I'm so sorry for you." Suzuki taunted in the flattest tone of voice possible, before looking at Ritsu and flashing an annoying grin towards him. "Anyways..." Shou closed his palm, only his thumb sticking out, and pointed towards the sliding glass door. "You in for a fun night? Or do you prefer to spend the night studying with a mood like you got a stick up your-"
"Suzuki!" Ritsu shushed him before he could complete his sentence, the tip of his ears red with a burning sensation. One that became inconveniently familiar these past few weeks.
Shou simply rolled his eyes and blew a raspberry, momentarily frustrated. "Fine, fine, I'll tone it down, with the... "vulgar languagery", whatever."
"Suzuki. "Languagery" is not a real word."
Shou's eyes blew open so wide Ritsu almost thought they would pop out of their sockets. That familiar yet slightly upsetting shiver went down his back as those vivid cyan eyes stared at him. "What?! I swore it was! What the hell! But- Dude, who cares. Will you hang out with me or not?!"
"Absolutely not." Ritsu's answer was immediate.
"Wh– But why?!" Suzuki threw his hands in frustration and confusion, palms facing up. "Do you really think that missing one single assignment will make your life a living hell? Ritsu, you need to rest."
Ritsu's brows furrowed. "What do you-"
"What do I mean?" Shou asked before Ritsu could complete his sentence, tone of voice seeping with indignation. He started motioning with his hands as he talked, a habit of his. "I can notice it! How exhausted you always are, how many times you've used the same excuse to dismiss me when I come over.." Suzuki let his hands drop to his sides. "You're not exactly the same anymore, ya know. I mean it when I say you need rest, and even if you lock me outside and block me on LINE, I will keep hitting on that key: you need to rest."
The room was silent as Ritsu tried to digest what he just heard.
He thought he was hiding it well. He even started taking energy drinks regularly so people wouldn't notice his crippling exhaustion. But maybe he was just clueless to his own appearance.
"So... Are you in for hanging out or not?" Suzuki broke the silence, his same usual tone of voice returning, as if he didn't want to let the mood get much darker. "We could either go to my place or fuck around town doing stupid shit. Your call. ... Well, except your own room. This place is giving me the creeps from how study-adapted it is. Everything here is somehow related to school, god forbid–"
"I think we could just walk around town and act foolish." Ritsu interrupted Suzuki. His own sudden words surprised him; he would usually atleast groan with laziness at the thought of hanging out around the city. But a sense of determination filled Ritsu.
I want to spend my teenage-hood with the people I like, not pleasing whoever "counts on me". If they get disappointed, let them be. Because they had nothing to do with MY future in the first place.
Shou's first reaction was surprise, that was followed by a wave of relief and excitement, mixing up in a complicated yet unmistakably positive batter of emotions. He had been begging to go out with Ritsu for a good while now. "Holy, you have no idea how much I wanted you to say that. Let's go."
Ritsu felt free. And suddenly, he didn't give a damn about that oncoming deadline anymore.
Ritsu and Suzuki stood on the skyscraper of an aged building. There were some cracks on its foundation. All kinds of graffiti littered the walls, reminders of the past passersby that once came to this place to mess around with friends. But, recently, it seemed to be completely abandoned and devoid of any spiritual presence, so Suzuki kind of borrowed this place as his own for a perfect hangout spot. And, infact, it was nice.
"You know," Suzuki started, "The night view is striking when we're far from artificial lighting. We can actually see the stars." He perked up as he remembered something. "Most people think nights in the wild are completely dark because of horror video games. You know, for the horror factor, game devs usually make you use a flashlight to be able to see in dark forests, right? But that's actually very wrong!"
"Oh? Why is that?" Ritsu was actually listening, and that kind of scared himself. He would definitely take the secret of liking Suzuki's rambling to his grave.
"Because, when there's no lighting to outshine anything, the sky is actually very visible and it lights up the surroundings quite enough! Like, okay, maybe the forest is dense and makes it harder to see, but! It can't be possible that trees are so dense they block the entirety of the sky's light, especially because it kind of appears through the leaves. Because you know that light goes through leaves a bit!"
Shou's explanation was a little bit poor. But he had a good point.
"And, because the moon already shines enough for you to have a decent sight, using a flashlight to see in a forest is utterly useless, because you'll only be able to focus on the point the flashlight is pointing towards to. Get it?" Suzuki looked at Ritsu expectantly, ready to explain it all over again.
"Why do you just spill out random information like this?" Ritsu's head tilted a bit to the side, eyes still focused on Shou's. He wouldn't admit that he was admiring them, though. Suzuki was distracted enough.
The tip of Suzuki's ears warmed up, transitioning to a red hue, but he still tried to play it cool. "Hah, well.. I just like telling you stuff. You always listen to me. I don't know why is that, though."
"That I listen to you?"
"Yeah."
"I just..." Ritsu kind of fumbled to find an answer that wasn't a very direct, very obvious 'I like your voice'. "Sometimes, you can talk about interesting things. I just find myself listening to it against my will. You're kind of very hard to ignore."
"So what you're trying to say is that you're obsessed and can't stop paying attention to–"
Ritsu elbowed Suzuki's side, which only made him giggle. A faint blush was present on both of the boys' faces. They locked eyes and accidentally looked at eachother for a bit longer than supposed, but Ritsu was the first to dart his eyes forward before things got too weird.
Shou kept his eyes on him for a moment too long before also looking away.
... What was that?
Ritsu felt his cheeks heat up.
"Ritsu." Shou's voice was sudden enough to cause Ritsu to jump a little. But he forced himself to maintain his own composure.
"Yeah?"
"Do you like someone?"
The question was so honest it made Ritsu's heart jump to his throat. He hurried to think of an answer. "I- No."
"You sure? You can tell me anything."
Yeah, right. As if I'm gonna tell you I've fallen head over heels for you just like that.
"Yes, I'm sure. I don't like anyone." Ritsu used all his remaining energy to not just run away before Shou got too nosey.
Suzuki set his gaze on the height below them both, watching as the wind ruffled the nearby trees' leaves. "... It's 'cause I like someone. But I don't know if they like me back."
Ritsu's heart twisted painfully in his chest. But he swallowed it down. "You do?"
"Yeah. ... They're my best friend, so I'm scared to make it awkward, but... I've been thinking for a while about confessing." Shou's tone of voice hinted at something more. But... Ritsu couldn't quite grasp what.
".. Well. If it makes you feel better, you should confess. Bottling up your feelings will only become a huge snowball of problems."
For some reason, Suzuki didn't seem to be satisfied with that answer.
"But- But I really don't know how to tell them. They didn't seem to realize it just yet. Even if I hinted at it so many times."
Ritsu thought of an answer that wouldn't make it obvious he was nearly reaching a point of running away before Shou could notice he was burning with jealousy and hurt. "I-... Well. I think that, if they didn't realize it.. That means they're confused or clueless. Maybe–"
"Dude, are you serious?" Suzuki looked almost sour.
Ritsu's brows furrowed. The ache that was taking over his chest intensified. He felt an inexplicable sense of guilt of not being able to truly help his friend. "What do you-"
"Ritsu, I love you."
...
It was like the entire city fell quiet just for this moment. Silence vacuumed Ritsu's ears, rendering him unable to think properly.
He couldn't muster a word. His parted mouth would occasionally open further just for him to close it right after, struggling with his words. Something that almost never occurred to him. Yet, here he was.
If Ritsu couldn't use his words... He would use actions.
Both boys' lips met in a kiss.
How could've I been so blind?
Ritsu's hands moved to rest at Suzuki's shoulders shyly. It was a first time for him; he had never kissed anyone before, much less know how to do it properly. He only had ever grasped the concept of kissing when he occasionally passed by the living room and found his mom watching those cheap rom-coms.
And yet, Shou didn't pull away. He did the exact opposite.
The kiss was inexperienced, and, frankly, somewhat messy. But it was reciprocal, and it was the only thing that really mattered right now.
When they parted, Ritsu's eyes were wide. The kiss wasn't heated, no. In all logical terms, it was merely a peck on the lips, a quick yet effective replacement for a worded reciprocation of a love confession. Yet.. Ritsu was still letting the fact that he initiated a kiss and got reciprocated sink in.
Shou, on another hand, was on cloud nine. His cheeks were rosy, his electric cyan eyes were practically glowing, and he had a grin stamped on his face so wide it looked like it hurt. But even if it hurt, he wouldn't've cared less.
He just got kissed by the boy he loved the most in this entire world.
Shou nuzzled his and Ritsu's noses together, the happiness practically manifesting through his orange, bubbly aura. It took Ritsu a little while to notice both of their auras were joined together.
"You do know this essentially means you're my boyfriend now, right?" Shou looked so hopeful it made Ritsu have to hold back a smile.
"Well, I wouldn't waste my first kiss on you for nothing."
"HAH! I get to call you pet names now."
"Absolutely not."
The newly-declared boyfriends had returned to the quietness of Ritsu's room at around 3:28 AM. They really went past their curfew. Well, atleast Ritsu's curfew. Because, oh boy, did he look sleepy.
Ritsu was comfortable in the mattress of his own bed, while Shou held him close with an arm. It wasn't quite cuddling, because Ritsu was turned towards the ceiling. But, in all honesty, that position was perfectly fine.
"I can't get no sleep." Shou commented, looking up at Ritsu. "Could you lend me some?" A playful question, not really meant to be taken seriously.
"How the hell do you "lend sleep" to someone?" Ritsu quirked an eyebrow at him.
"Hm, I dunno. .. Maybe make them feel just as calm and relaxed as you are until they get sleepy." His eyes glinted with a hint of mischief. "A kiss on the cheek, maybe?"
Ritsu's eye twitched.
"Come on, we're boyfriends now! We can cuddle and kiss and do sappy things. Amirite, my dear?"
"You're asking too much out of someone who just went through a bombshell of emotions not several hours ago. But, fine. ... We can cuddle, if that'll make you feel better."
Ritsu would never admit he also wanted to cuddle, himself.
"Great!" Shou immediately scooted closer, turning Ritsu over until his back was turned towards his chest, and then wrapped his arms around Ritsu's torso.
"What, you're the big spoon, now? Am I not the taller one here?" Ritsu turned his head sideways, glancing at Shou from his back.
"Pfft, who cares about that. But if you want to be a big spoon, we can both become it. We'd just be turned towards eachother and stare into eachother's eyes until we fall asleep. What a lovely way to doze off into dreamland."
"Ugh. If I knew you were such a sap, I would've run away the moment you asked me to be your boyfriend." Yet, Ritsu's words had absolutely no bite.
And Ritsu would absolutely still accept being Shou's boyfriend regardless of how cheesy he acted.
Shou just giggled, and pressed a playful, lighthearted kiss to Ritsu's neck, one that sent a small shiver down his back. "So, are you going to turn or not? I wanna see that pretty face before I go to sleep."
"Tsc. Fine." Ritsu reluctantly turned, his back no longer towards Shou, instead now facing the wall as he snaked his arms around Shou's waist and held him close.
Shou seemed satisfied, ready to doze off, until he perked up. "Also, where's my cheek kiss?"
"You cannot be serious."
"Please?" Shou made his signature puppy eyes. The ones that he used as a dirty trick to get what he wanted. Because he knew those big, blue eyes could be dangerous if he knew how to make a sad look.
And it was working. He had clearly mastered this trick. Ritsu found himself pressing a peck to Shou's left cheek before he could even stop himself. Who knows if Shou had also used mind manipulation.
Shou just grinned and scooted closer. "That's more like it." Though, his grin softened into something more genuine as he properly looked at Ritsu. "... Goodnight, my sweetheart."
"Goodnight, Shou."
And Ritsu woke up the next morning with his first sight being a panicky Shou and a devastated older brother. Good grief.