Chapter Text
Dusekkar is, and has always been, a steady mantle of support for those who need it.
Whether it be because of his protection in rounds against more-than-experienced killers, or because of his ability to bring comfort to anyone he talks to, he always seems to be the person people go to when they need words of encouragement, be it authentic or empty.
He doesn’t know how he ended up here, but he feels like it has something to do with Shedletsky. The guy has always been up to concerning things in his life, but Dusekkar has known this since the day he chose to be friends with him.
While ending up in a random, horrible place was disorientating for a while, Dusekkar got used to his small, but stable, cabin room. It wasn’t rich, or pretty by any means, but it was his and he’d do the best he could to make it how he likes it since he isn’t going home anytime soon. Many of those who had arrived with him had hoped that after a few games everything would end, but it never did. Every time someone new was added to the realm, they all went through the same stages everyone else went through, all starting with denial and ending off on sad acceptance.
Dusekkar supposes there are some benefits of being here, though.
For one, he wouldn’t have met the people he now considers friends. While already knowing Shedletsky, Builderman, and Taph, he still is grateful for the new faces he got to know. He absolutely adores Elliot’s pizza, more so when it’s just the survivors eating in the cabin and not in a round. Guest is a steady figure much like Dusekkar, who both attempt to keep things together, being steady for others. It isn’t necessarily difficult for Dusekkar, as he’s been doing this stuff when he began as a new employee at headquarters. Point being is that all these new connections have fostered just by being one of the “chosen” to be forsaken.
Two: The constant ways the realm actively forces them to become better.
Dusekkar has had his magic for as long as he can remember. He would use it on the daily with whatever tasks came with being an admin, but after being forsakened, he’s put it to new usage. He can help the other survivors with his protection (which usually backfires since he ends up angering the killer anyway, dying not long after) and he can slow the killer down. He’s one of the few on the team who can actually do things to the killer. That doesn’t mean the other survivors aren’t important, though. Noob has it really hard since they can’t do anything, which makes Dusekkar want to help them and the other Sentinels more often. He tries not to prioritize anyone, but it’s difficult seeing the ones you care about being attacked by a cold-hearted murderer.
Three: Taph.
If we’re focused on people we prioritize, the main person would be Taph. Dusekkar could speak about him for hours. Before all of this, he only knew Taph as an acquaintance, always running “errands” led by Builderman which Dusekkar didn’t necessarily approve of one hundred percent of the time. But after all the trials they have encountered together, he could think of millions of reasons why Taph is so special to him.
.....
Their relationship started not too long ago. He can remember it clearly happening after a gruesome round against Slasher. Dusekkar and Taph stayed together the entire round, helping out others they ran into across the Horror Hotel, and after taking some horrible hits while placing down a tripwire, Taph was out almost instantly as Slasher closed in on the both of them. Dusekkar can remember the purple light of Taph’s eyes staring directly into his own, his face hidden but fear present. He watched as Taph tried crawling, but was struck down by the machete, blood going everywhere. Dusekkar’s flame had flickered, drawing a whine of sadness out of his throat as the “Last Man Standing” music (as everyone liked to call it) kicked on.
By that point, Dusekkar had no fight left in him to continue running. He felt like it was pointless after watching all of the people he held close fall in front of his eyes, and all he wanted to do was be with them. He tried somewhat, knowing that’s what everyone would want him to do, but ended up losing anyways as he got beheaded.
He spawned in, pain going away and leaving a memory in its wake, and immediately felt a wave of unease wash over him. He ignored words from the small number of people near him, barely acknowledging their comments, and held his staff close as if it was a guiding light which would lead him to Taph. Dusekkar knew their relationship had been more than friendly for a while, but it was comfortable so no one said anything.
He finds Taph in his room, sitting on his bed with his knees drawn up to his chest, almost curled into a ball. His shoulders move up and down, and Dusekkar can hear puffs and hitches of air which show they’re crying.
He crawls onto his bed, staff placed down on the wall near where Dusekkar entered, and places his hand on Taph’s cloaked shoulder.
“Sunshine, what brings you to this place of mine? I’ve been searching for you in this place, attempting to keep a steady pace.”
Taph raises his head, cloak falling off of his head slightly. Dusekkar panics slightly inside, not knowing if Taph wants him to see underneath. He can recall seeing him once before in a match, but that was accidental.
“I was so scared.” He signs. “It was so painful, I wanted to stay with you.”
Dusekkar blinks, and without thinking brings his hand to cup Taph’s face. He could hear their breath hitch slightly, but continued on.
“The only thing I could think of was you. Seeing you die struck terror in me all the way through.” He begins. “I hate seeing you die. It rips me apart and makes me want to cry.”
In that next moment, Taph brings up their hands to Dusekkar’s face as well, and brings his neck gaiter down, showing pure beauty to him.
A scar runs across her face, faint, but there. It runs over his lips, having long been healed. There are healed injuries here and there which Dusekkar assumes is from dealing with explosives his whole life. Dusekkar can see freckles litter his face, some darker than others and some lighter. He finds himself in awe of the light in front of him.
Without a second thought, Dusekkar brings his lips to meet Taph’s, doing what he’s subconsciously wanted to do all along. From this distance, Dusekkar can smell faint hints of smoke which remain on Taph’s cloak. He doesn’t care, and if anything, he enjoys the smell and the comfort it brings.
Dusekkar pulls away and Taph brings his neck gaiter back up to cover himself.
“Pumpkin, I love you. I hope I can show you my gratitude with everything I can offer you, which isn’t much, but myself in my entirety.”
He smiles at Taph.
“I, too, hope you can see my care. I shall show it to you with all I can bear, for I consider you my very own air.”
.....
That was one of his favorite memories he held dear to him, and it could always cheer him up whenever he’s down.
But as of right now, Dusekkar is not having a good day.
His small cabin room has books strung everywhere. He thought to bring his books from home with his magic, which already takes a lot out of him since magic isn’t intended to go through different realms, and he now finds himself standing with a pile of literature in the part of his room with bookshelves.
It doesn’t help that today has been a disaster for him already, considering that he hasn’t been up-to-par with his assistance to the other survivors. He’s been downed in almost every round that has occurred that day, and when he did survive it was because of the others’ aid and his attempts at not being targeted.
He’s had days where his magic is off, not fully attending to his commands and wants. But it’s never been this bad to the point where he’s stressing about it. Now he has to deal with his mess of books before he can even think of beginning to relax.
He bends down and picks up a book, one titled The Outsiders. It isn’t necessarily a long book, but one that’s entertaining nonetheless. He remembers how he found out about it, Builderman telling him that he got it recommended to him from Taph, and how Taph loves that genre and style of writing. Dusekkar smiles, rubbing the top of his head and placing the book on a shelf he’ll consider his “favorites.”
It’ll be Taph’s, as well. He has as an afterthought.
In that moment of Dusekkar’s reminiscing, Taph walks into his cabin room, slowly and hesitantly, as if he had read his own mind. If he wanted to see anyone in the world right now, it would be Taph. He’s always provided comfort to Dusekkar, never anything negative.
It takes Taph a moment to gather what he’s seeing. He observes Dusekkar standing surrounded by a massive pile of books. It doesn’t take a genius to realize that this isn’t a job only one person should do.
“May I come in?” Taph signs, nervously, like something is on his mind as well.
If anything, Dusekkar’s slight smile turns a little brighter.
“Of course, my light. What brings you here, present in my line of sight?" He questions, head turning back to the display of books on the ground, feeling a bit embarrassed at the mess it presents in his room.
He moves his line of sight to see Taph’s head slowly turn to observe the room, and then back to him. Dusekkar smiles sheepishly, and brings his hand to rub the back of his neck.
“I see your eyes wandering around my room, and I can tell you it is the cause of my darkening fume.” He states, eyes darting to where it’s cleaner. “It’ll be clean soon if I-”
He cuts himself off as he sees Taph crouch down to grab a book, one titled To Kill a Mockingbird. Dusekkar can tell what it is from the tree on the cover with a ball of twine, or string as some see it.
“I can help you.” Taph signs, placing the book on an empty shelf which Dusekkar will now automatically consider fiction.
“My bird, you shouldn’t stress. Since this is my own doing, I shall deal with the mess.”
His words go unheard by Taph as he moves around some books to sit down on the floor. Her head turns to look at Dusekkar, as if expecting him to sit as well.
“Please.”
He falters, watching as Taph grabs books and starts to sort them into piles. He can hear the shuffling of his cloak with every movement, the neck gaiter he wears to cover his face falling slightly, though Taph makes no hurry to place it back up. It’s a sign of trust that Dusekkar has had the honor of receiving ever since they got close.
He starts to settle himself down next to him and sort more books into piles that they’ve already created. For some reason, he feels more at ease with every moment he spends near Taph, and Dusekkar feels himself start to become content.
His hands graze Taph’s at one point, the black leather feeling comforting rather than unknown. He’s held Taph’s hand more times than he could count, majority of the time when comfort is needed for the both of them. While they don’t necessarily die within rounds, it still brings pain and horrible memories to the forefront.
He tries to keep Taph as close as he can to him.
Call him nervous, or protective, but he cares deeply for Taph. He never had felt this way for anyone before coming to this hellish realm, and he considers that to be his favorite thing about being forsakened.
“I remember reading a lot of these books.” Taph signs after placing another one down, bringing Dusekkar out of his thoughts. “Reading has always been something I loved. I enjoy it very much.”
“I do, too, my beautiful bird. Writing is the most precious way of making your voice heard.” He states, taking the finished stack of non-fiction novels and placing them at the bottom of a shelf.
Taph stares at Dusekkar. His eyes are barely hidden underneath the loose cloak, but it isn’t anything he hasn’t seen before. He remembers the first time he saw Taph’s face, and he couldn’t help but fall for him.
Taph may be ashamed of how he looks, or how he presents himself to the others, but Dusekkar couldn’t care less. His kindness, personality, traits, way of love, all speak in ways which words could never compare to. He’s always been the one to focus on others rather than himself, which Dusekkar doesn’t support often, but it’s something to note about how Taph will sacrifice himself for those he loves in the blink of an eye.
He’s brought back to the present by Taph blowing a book covered in dust onto his face. He blinks, and can see the way Taph’s shoulders move up and down in the motion of a silent laugh.
“What is the matter with you, Pumpkin?” Taph signs, using his “sign name” that Dusekkar was grateful to be given.
He tries to come up with a response, one that will settle Taph’s curiosities and not cause them their own stress, but he decides against it and chooses the truth.
“My world, my day has been dry. Every time I try to help, to supply, my disdain seems to shoot into the sky.” Dusekkar answers, honestly.
Taph listens as they place more books into a pile, this time ones which are “Sci-Fi.” He looks up after he gathers the last one in that genre, and starts to sign.
“I’m very sorry, Pumpkin. You do so much for the team… you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself.”
With Taph saying that one line, Dusekkar can feel his stress start to chip away, slowly.
Taph seems to have that effect on people, or at least Dusekkar. He assumes he has a weak spot for him, but he isn’t ashamed. If you could see from his own eyes, you’d find what Dusekkar sees in Taph every time.
He gives a sad smile.
“There is no need to give false words of encouragement. What has happened is proof I need to focus on one’s development.” Dusekkar replies, bringing a hand up to Taph’s cheek.
Taph brings their hand to the one which rests on their cheek, pulling the hand down and cupping it with their other hand. Dusekkar feels as if he could fall in love all over again.
After a while of peace, holding hands, and contemplating what to say, Taph begins to sign again.
“It is not a lie, my Pumpkin. You are very generous, loyal, and you never give yourself a moment's peace. Rest assured that the others understand. You are a crucial member, and nothing will change that.” Taph signs after a while of contemplating what to say.
If Dusekkar felt his love for Taph skyrocket to the point he didn’t think was possible, he’s not going to let anyone know.
He lets out a laugh and grabs the book Taph had been messing with, one titled The Kite Runner.
“That book caught my attention. It’s very sad. I can relate to Hassan, and I think you can, too. He is very selfless and kind, always putting the needs of others before himself and making sure to keep the peace around him.”
Dusekkar smiles as Taph grabs it to place it in the final pile. “I had been meaning to read it for a while before I was brought here. I never had the time to actually sit down and focus on it, dear.”
Taph grabs the last pile of books they had sorted, ones that they categorized as “Fantasy” which included novels such as The Hobbit, The Kite Runner, and Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, and placed it on a shelf close to the floor, but not ground level.
Dusekkar suddenly feels as if Taph is going to leave after putting the pile away, and cups her right hand.
“My love, will you stay with me? While you are here, you make me stress-free.” He declares, looking into Taph’s dark eyes which are now visible to Dusekkar due to the light he emits.
Dusekkar blinks, and suddenly Taph is hugging him, giving silent puffs of air to make up for a laugh.
He pulls away long enough to sign. “I came here for the same reason. These rounds today made me stressed out more than usual, and I wanted to be near you.”
Dusekkar places his arms around Taph, reciprocating the hug, and stares at The Kite Runner they just put away which is right in his line of sight from where they sit on the ground. He grasps one of his hands around his staff which was next to him on the floor, not picking it up all the way, but raises it horizontally so he could levitate the book to near his other hand.
“You don’t have to, but I would love to spend more time with you. I want to read this book you spoke of, out loud to show my thanks, my love.” Dusekkar states, beginning to stand, grabbing Taph’s hand to help them up.
As soon as they’re both standing, Taph pulls down his neck gaiter long enough for Dusekkar to initiate a kiss, Taph happily reciprocating it back.
“I would absolutely love to.”
.....
Hours later after eventually passing out, if a survivor decides to go searching for them because no one has seen them all afternoon, they don’t dare disturb their peace.