Chapter Text
Buffy woke up feeling more relaxed and more contented than she ever had. Waking up in Spike’s arms was a revelation. She couldn’t believe she’d never allowed herself even the thought of doing it before. She couldn’t wait to do it again. But first she had a war to win. And for that to happen she had to get up.
“Spike”. She shook him gently.
Buffy knew the moment he awoke. He tensed, and she knew he was just waiting for her to kick him in the head and run out, virtue fluttering. Well not this time.
“Spike, you feel like kicking some preacher ass?”
Spike snorted in amusement. “I surely do, Slayer.”
“Well, let’s go then.”
He hesitated for a moment and Buffy could see he was trying to decide whether to comment on the night they spent together. But before she could decide how she would respond he straightened up and said, “you lead, I follow, Slayer”.
So she led.
With Spike at her side taking care of Caleb was easier than she thought it was going to be. Spike led Caleb on a merry chase while she King Arthur’d the coolest weapon she’d ever seen right out of the stone. And while Spike had Caleb distracted she stepped up right behind him and sliced his head clean off.
“Well, that was a bit anticlimactic then.” Spike said with a laugh.
Buffy laughed too. “It really was.” She paused and grew serious. “Spike…I couldn’t have done this without you.” He started to speak but she held up her hand to stop him. “Spike, just listen. You gave me exactly what I needed last night. You’ve been giving me exactly what I needed for weeks. Maybe even years. Only…I guess I didn’t want to admit that. Didn’t want to admit what it was that I needed, I mean. Or maybe…I knew what I needed but knew my friends would never accept what I needed? Gahh!!! Buffy and words are unmixy things.”
“You don’t have to explain anything to me Buffy.”
“Actually, I do. I had a lot of time to think last night and, for once, I let myself. I used to stand up for myself. Did you know that? I’d forgotten. I don’t even know when I stopped. When I just stopped doing what I thought was best and started doing what they thought was best.”
“And by they you mean The Watcher, The Witch and The Whelp.”
“Yeah. And Angel too, I guess. Spike, I let them kick me out of my own house! I mean, who does that? They tell me to leave my own house and…I just do it?”
“So, what are you going to do about it?” asked Spike with a hopeful little half-smile.
“I’m going to go home. No, scratch that. We’re going to go home.”
Spike smiled. “You lead I follow, Slayer.”
“No Spike. You don’t walk behind me anymore, you stand beside me. From this moment on you stand beside me.”
Spike grinned.
***
Buffy and Spike headed back to Revello Drive. They didn’t speak, both too lost in their own thoughts of the confrontation to come. As they approached the house Buffy paused and placed a hand on Spike’s arm, halting him in his tracks.
“Spike?”
“You’ll be fine, love. Just taking back what’s yours, yeah?”
“That’s not…Spike.” She paused and took a deep breath. “I love you.”
For a moment he just stood there, completely gobsmacked. Internally Buffy giggled at the expression on his face. As she watched him though she could see a dozen different emotions overtake him one right after another. Hope, fear, doubt, pleasure, anger, all in rapid succession finally settling into resignation.
“No, you don’t. But thanks for saying it.”
“Oh my god, Spike! How long have you been telling me I love you? And now that I finally admit it you don’t believe me? You’re…you’re…a dope.”
“You’re not just saying that because you think I’m the only one you’ve got left?”
“No. I’m not. I love you. Even though you’re a dope.”
“Well then.”
“Well then? That’s your response? Really?”
“What sort of a response did you expect?” Buffy crossed her arms over her chest and sent him a glare that would have made a Turok-Han run in the opposite direction.
Spike just laughed. “I love you too, Buffy. I love you too.”
“Good. That’s settled then.”
And with that Buffy turned and marched up the walkway and into the house with Spike beside her all the way.