Work Text:
Varian shuddered, as the crisp air hurled itself toward him. The night was cold; sharp winds moving with the elegance of ballet dancers, whispering tales of stolen moments, stories of that which remains forbidden in this world.
His eyes glistened with the reddening light of his cigarette filter, smoke filling the air around him as he lazily blew out, trying to empty his head, free it from this relentless torture.
Polluting his lungs reminded him of late-night rendezvous, dingy bars with flickering lights, gas station trips with spilled slushies, huddling close to share a lighter; that fluttering flame that danced in emerald-green eyes, those lips that he could never get close to.
Varian took another drag, gazing up at the city lights that illuminated the path around him like a swarm of fireflies.
Shifting his gaze, he focused onto the shadows of the cars beside him, shadows of people inside.
It was these people who turn him outside-in, these people who hold him against what he holds dear, all in the name of what is "right". People who crawl into his ears, threaten his state of mind, forbid a kind of affection that isn't familiar to them.
Varian didn't feel deserving of love until him.
And of course, it was that kind of love that was unnatural. A sin. Of course, Varian was only capable of receiving the 'wrong' type of love, one that he can't celebrate, enjoy, or express.
Of course, Varian isn't really worthy of love.
His phone buzzed in his pocket, and he immediately took it out to see the notification.
Hugo (1)
Varian turned off his phone.