Chapter Text
“Well, just send us somebody! They’re kicking our asses out here!” A pause. “C-Captain Flowers? Oh, uh, he’s- he’s busy. Yeah. Busy. Running. Drills. With Private Tucker. Asked me to make this call for some more god damn men.” Another, longer pause. “Fine, okay! I don’t care, just send them!”
Chuch clicked his radio off with a groan, putting a hand to his head. Blue Command was, as always, useless. Flowers never seemed to have a problem with them. When he called Command, Flowers would get what he needed within a few days. But Flowers was two weeks dead, and Command was nowhere near as helpful to Church. He had just spent the last hour arguing with Vic to send another soldier or two down to Blue Base, since it was only Tucker and himself against the Reds now. Church didn’t like those odds… especially since Tucker was a rookie and, to be honest, not all that great of a soldier.
“So, how’d it go?”
Speak of the Devil… Church turned around, jumping slightly when he came face to face with the aqua coloured armour that had once belonged to Flowers. It took his brain a few moments to remember that Tucker had switched out his armour for Flowers’. “Jesus,” he grumbled as his heart settled, “are you actually going to wear that?”
“Well, we put Flowers in my old armour so hell yeah I’m doing to wear it!” Tucker scoffed, gesturing towards the caves on the cliffs where they had buried Flowers body. “What else am I going to do? Fight the Reds in my kevlar?”
“It really doesn’t bother you that you stole the armour of our dead Captain,” Church deadpanned, “and that you’re wearing the armour of a dead man.”
Tucker tilted his head, silent a moment, before giving it a shake. “Naw man not really. This colour is way better than regulation blue!”
Church shook his head. “You’re weird as hell, you know that?”
“Actually Church, I think you’ll find that the ladies call me fine as hell.” Tucker made finger guns at him. “So, is Command going to send us more soldiers or what?”
Church sighed. Tucker, he was learning the longer he was in the canyon, seemed to consider himself a ladies man, expect he carried himself in a way that was mostly posturing. Church doubted Tucker had slept with even a quarter of the people he claimed to have. “Yes,” he confirmed, “two actually. Command got word that the Reds were getting an extra man, so they wanted to make sure the sides here are as even as possible.” Though it’d be better if they sent them enough men for an advantage over the Reds, but Church supposed he’d have to be happy with an even team rather than a disadvantage.
“Great! When will they be here?”
“The first should be arriving within a week. The other shortly after. Guess they’re coming from different training camps.” Church explained.
“Better than nothing I guess,” Tucker shrugged as he strolled past Church. He put a hand to his visor and leaned towards the direction of Red Base, far at the other end of the canyon. “Just as long as they get here before the Reds notice we’re down a man. You told Command it was urgent right?”
“Of course I did!” Church had, repeatedly, tried to make it clear that they needed men fast. “At least, I tried my damnedest. Ever since Flowers died… I don’t know. it’s like they’re being intentionally difficult.”
Fitting, really, considering how everything else in his life seemed to be intentionally difficult for him.
“Glad you made the call then. Vic kind of bugs me.” Tucker looked back towards him. “… What do you think they’ll be like? The new guys.”
“How the fuck should I know?” Church rolled his eyes. “It’s not like they send little personality blurbs about them. Knowing my luck, they’re either going to idiots or assholes. Or idiot assholes.” Church turned away to head back into the base. “Come on. We’re going to have to prepare for the new guys, set up bunks and double check the rations. Make sure we’ve got what we need.”
Tucker followed. “Hey,” he said eagerly, “think one will be a chick?”
“Why do you care?” Church regretted the question the moment it left his mouth.
“Because, Church, that’ll give me something to do in this canyon if you know what I mean.” The grin on his face was practically audible as he made a vague thrusting motion with his hips. “Bow chika bow wow!”
Church closed his eyes. “Dear god I hate you.”
“Eh, you hate everything. So that doesn’t really mean much coming form you.” Tucker suddenly bounded forward, pushing past Church. “Dibs on counting rations!”
“Hey! Wait-!” Too late. Tucker rounded a corner and disappeared from sight. Church growled. “You better not be jerking off in there!” His shout received no reply. He fucking hated this team.
**
Command, at the very least, had made good on the timing for the first soldier being sent. He arrived within a week, decked out in light blue armour, more saturated than Church’s, a pistol on his hip, and a battle rifle on his back
There was just one problem.
“Private Maranta, reporting for duty!” He saluted, standing at attention as Church and Tucker stared down at him.
Literally down. The “soldier” was shorter than even Church, and his voice was soft and high pitched. Church was glad his helmet was hiding his gawking. Had Command sent them a kid?!
“… Sirs?” Maranta continued when neither Church nor Tucker spoke, “is everything alright?”
“Private Maranta,” Church spoke slowly, still processing everything, “how the fuck did you get in the army?”
“Excuse me?” Maranta’s voice managed to go up an octave. “Wh-what does that mean?”
“Uh, it means how the hell were you able to convince the recruiters that you’re of age?” Tucker chimed in, looking Maranta up and down. “Have your balls even dropped yet dude?”
Maranta seemed at a loss for a moment before bristling. “Really? You think I’m a- I’m twenty-four!” There was a muttered “assholes”, under his breath that Church only just caught.
“Riiiight.” Church’s voice dripped with sarcasm as he gestured towards himself. “And I’m the leader of the UNSC.” He snorted as Maranta made a series of flustered sounds. “Whatever, I don’t care. You’re here now, so might as well make use of you. I’m Private Church and this,” he jerked his thumb towards Tucker, “is Private Tucker.”
Tucker gave a mock salute. “Sup, kid?”
“Hold on, you’re both Privates?” Maranta’s voice went back to it’s regular pitch. Which meant it was still high as hell. “Wheres the Captain?” He looked between them and towards the Base. “I was told I was going to be assigned to Captain Flowers’ team.”
Church suddenly felt awkward, shuffling his feet. “Oh uh… yeah he… he died.” He coughed, turning his head away from Maranta. “I’m sort of filling in for him ANYWAY-“ he continued quickly, turning back towards him, “just go set up in base alright? There’s a data pad chip on your bunk for you that contains the basics about what we’re doing here. Just… Go make yourself comfortable. I guess.”
Maranta stared at Church for a few moments, slowly shaking his head. “… Right. Okay,” he said hesitantly, “I’ll go… do that then.” He gave another glance between Tucker and Church before walking past them. “Dad never had to deal with shit like this…” he mumbled, walking into the base.
Once Church felt Maranta was well out of earshot he turned towards Tucker, “Holy shit,” he exasperated, gesturing in the direction Maranta had gone, “can you fucking believe it? They sent us a kid!” Church let his arm drop to his side in an angry flop. “How did he get through basic without anyone noticing?”
“Well the war with the aliens is getting real bad, isn’t it?” Tucker reasoned, shrugging, “so maybe they lowered recruiting age? Or maybe he’s just like… a super competent super soldier or something.”
“Oh like they’d send us a competent soldier against these Red assholes.” Church snorted. “All the really good soldiers probably get sent to fight the Covenant.” He sighed and reached for his sniper rifle that was leaning against the base walls. “Come on, while he’s checking out the base, we should go check up on the Reds. See if they’ve gotten their new soldier yet.”
“Just gunna leave him in there alone?” Tucker asked, surprised. “What if he comes out here and sees that we’re gone? Might think the Reds attacked or something.”
“Tucker I really don’t care.” Church peered through the scope, making sure it was still properly aligned. “Besides, it’s not like we’re going to be up on those cliffs for long. All they ever do is stand around and talk.” Yup, looked like the scope was still working good. Or, at least, Church thought it was. He hadn’t gotten a proper lesson from Flowers before he suddenly died.
“Alright alright.” Tucker held up his hands. “Guess it’s better than sitting on our ass all day.”
In reality, Church just needed time away from the new recruit. Just his luck really, that Command would send some teenaged brat.
**
Church and Tucker returned to the base within a half hour, arguing.
“Would you stop complaining about the tank already?” Church’s hands were clutched around his rifle and he was sorely tempted to throw it to the ground in frustration. “Tank beats armour plated car any day. We’re finally going to get a real, proper leg up on the Reds and all you can think about are chicks! Of which, just to remind you in case you’ve forgotten, there are ZERO of in the canyon.”
“Look man, I’m just trying to think of the future!” Tucker countered, holstering his pistol as he walked down the ramp into Blue Base. “Like, once the war is over! We’re going to be war heroes. Chicks may dig that shit, but it all means nothing if we don’t have a sweet ride to pick them up in!”
“Tucker, it doesn’t matter. Whatever vehicles Command sends us, they’re just going to take back once the war is done. We’re not going to get to keep them.” He set his rifle down against the wall. “So would you please stop your bitching?”
Tucker grumbled, kicking his locker open. “I don’t bitch nearly half as much as you do.”
Church turned on him, glaring hard through the visor of his helmet. “Tucker, I swear to god-“
“Excuse me.” Church sighed as Headache Number 2 approached and turned to face him. Maranta was standing by the far doorway, arms folded against his chest.
“What is it Maranta?” He asked as he turned to face the smaller soldier. Church noted that, other than a pistol on his hip, Maranta was unarmed and no longer carrying his bag. Must have unpacked already then.
“I was reading over my briefing files,” Maranta began, shifting his weight from foot to foot, “and I was wondering, what’s all this about a Red base and a Red army?”
“Well, Maranta,” Church crouched slightly, hands on his knees, as if he was speaking to a child, “those would be our enemies.”
Which, to be honest, was probably the case. Maranta had to be only sixteen, maybe seventeen. He knew the war against the Covenant was getting bad, even if he was just stuck fighting the Reds, but had it really become so bad that they had to take in teens?
“Isn’t our enemy the Covenant?” Maranta questioned as he continued to fidget. He was repeatedly flexing his hand in agitation. “You know- the aliens trying to destroy all of humanity? That we’ve been at war with for over two decades?”
Church stood up straight with a shrug. “Yeah, I don’t exactly know the whole story? All I know is that when I got here they handed me a gun and said “shoot those guys” and that’s what I’ve been doing.”
Tucker snickered loudly behind him. “Well, I wouldn’t say that exactly. You’ve certainly been trying to shoot them.”
Church whipped his head around and gave Tucker the dirtiest look he could muster despite the fact he was currently wearing a helmet. It did nothing to stop Tucker from continuing to chuckle.
His attention was abruptly brought back to Maranta who seemed to give a hiss of anger. “Are you serious?! This is not what I signed up for!” He took a breath, lowering his shoulders, taking a moment before continuing with, “I want to help stop the Great War, not fight in some pointless backwater skirmish.”
“Hey, maybe if complain to Command enough they’ll grant you your death wish.” Church sneered slightly. So Maranta had join the army as a glory seeker.
“I just think,” Maranta said slowly, voice strained, “that our time could be better spent someplace else.”
Tucker walked by Church to clap a hand on Maranta’s shoulder. “Look, from what I’ve seen so far, we’re just a bunch of arguing idiots fighting a bunch of arguing idiots. So, yeah, our time would probably be spent better someplace else.” He shrugged. “No one here is against you. Well, expect Church. But he’s an asshole so don’t worry about him.”
Church gritted his teeth as Maranta chuckled and nodded. Since arriving in this canyon his life had been absolutely miserable. He had thought Blood Gulch was rock bottom but apparently not. The Universe had other ideas, it seemed, and those ideas involved not one but two idiots on his team.
Typical really.