Chapter Text
Robin: tacoman
Billy: Paper boi
Vance: Pinball Obsession
Amy: sweetheartforgwen
Finney: Regulus
Bruce: Barty
Griffin: Evan
Gwen: Dorcas
Slytherin Skittles
Friday, 11:46 PM
Regulus: I’m not ready for school monday
Barty: We don’t have school????
Evan: Yes… we do Bruce…
Barty: WHATSG SICNW WHEN NO I STILL NEED TO GLOW UOP WHAT IF VANCES TRYING GALKINF TO ME JS TO SEE THE SAME LOSER FROM LAST YEAR UDHAJ
Regulus: You call yourself a loser but you’re the golden boy and peole basically kiss the ground you walk on…
Barty: okay so why don’t u js kys
Regulus: like my mom?
Dorcas: like our mom?
Regulus: heh~ great minds rhink alike huh~
Evan: use that dumb ass thing again and i’m telling robin that you’re in love with him and dream about having his kids
Regulus: July 13th 4:35 am
Evan: STOP FINNEY PLS NO DONT SITG ILY PLEASE DONT WE AGREED NOR RO MENTION THAF AGAIN
Dorcas: what the fuck happen on July 13 at 4:35 am
Barty: we were on facetime and Griffin was being gay and decided it would be a good time to put on dog ears and act like a puppy boy for billy😭he made some interesting sounds…
Barty: finney took a video of him doing it and he hasn’t deleted bc he says its “such good blackmail I can’t delete it”
Dorcas: oh griffin are u into pet play or whatever
Evan: NO I WAS JS MESSINFS AROUDN BC I HEARD HE HAS A PER DOG I PROMISE IM NTI WEIRD LIKE UR BROTHER
Regulus: how am I weird???? ur the one that gets off to the idea of billy being ur dominant alpha or whatever
Evan: …
Barty: that reminds me of the time when we were in class and Mrs. V asked what the opposite of dominant was and griffin proudly said submissive
Dorcas: WHAT
Evan: STIP THAT WAS SO EMBARRASINF BILLY WAS THERE TOO💔💔
Barty: at least it wasn’t like when finney fell straight onto vance and immediately gor shoved towards robin who he almost pants😭
Regulus: atop pelase i dint wanna remember that that was the worst day if my life. ither than the day my mom khs🥹
Evan: It couldn’t have been that bad…
Barty: it was so bad finney was basically holding onto robins legs trying to pull down his pants as he fell. I never thought someone could embarrass themselves so badly. I’m pretty sure the bully got like 10 times worse after that
Regulus: Είμαι έξω από το σπίτι σου. Άνοιξε την πόρτα πριν μπω μέσα και σε σκοτώσω (I'm outside your house. Open the door before I break in and kill you.)
Barty: what does that mean
Barty: WHY ARE TOY OURSIDE MY HOUSE FIJNEY
Evan: what.
Dorcas: He’s already there??? He left like four minutes ago damn
Barty: GWN CINTROL YUOR ODG OFD A BOTHER OLS SHSE CHANDRIF ME IM TOO PRETTY TO DIEAND I HAVENT SLEPT WITH VANCE YET
Regulus: why is the only thing spelt write in that message you trying to get fucked by my cousin and yiu glazing urself.
Barty: excuse me
Barty: VAN. EUS UR COUSIN WHAT
Regulus: yeah i forgot to mention it thi its not that big of a deal.
Barty: well i mean… do you think you could use this ti set me uo with him
Regulus: no.
Barty: oh okay so i’ll js kms
Regulus: finally
Regulus: “its js me and you griffin~ come with alpha to run away and start a new life with a new pack…” I growl, asserting my dominance and claim over my omega.
Dorcas: what the fuck man
Finney: …
Barty: oh im so glad I didn’t kms now i have more stuff for black mail
Regulus: STIP
Evan: where the hell is finney
Bruce: he’s under the couch so I can get him…
Dorcas: under the couch???
Evan: he’s mentally challenged i swear
Addicts
Sunday, 8:45 PM
tacoman: who’s ready for school monday
pinball obsession: shut up
paper boi: im excited bc I get to see the loml :)
sweetheartforgwen: he doesn’t know you exist btw.
paper boi: SHUT UP???? GWEN PROBABLY HATES UR ASS AND IS JS USING YOU FOR YOUR BROTHER
sweetheartforgwen: why would my own gf be using me for my brother what
pinball obsession: excuse me.
sweetheartforgwen: something wrong????
Pinball obsession: YES??? YOU’RE DATING MY COUSIN YOU DUMB FUCKING FAG
tacoman: what.
pinball obsession: smth wrong taco man
tacoman: YOU’RE COUSINS WIRH FINNEY THE FAG YEAS SOMTHING IS WRONG.
pinball obsession: did I not tell y’all???? must’ve js slipped my mind…
Sweetheartforgwen: okay and what if I tell bruce you like him and you what to impregnate him and have him be a house wife
paper boi: Sto piangendo. Vance, ma che cazzo ti prende?
pinball obsession: you need to shut the hell up imma break ur pasta i swear.
tacoman: not the pasta😭
paper boi: js attacking my culture you filthy white boy
pinball obsession: ur white too???
paper boi: yeah but im a cultured white
tacoman: both of you are filthy white boys.
sweetheartforgwen: exactly.
tacoman: vance bc u and finney are related can u get him to do my work for me🥺🥺
pinball obsession: fuck no KYSKYSKYSKYS YOU FRESKM DIE DIE DIE HE DESERVES BETTER THANU INHATE U KYS ik ur address im gonna come an beat ur ass robin. Sleep with one eye open.
tacoman: gald you didn’t overreact…