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The door to the gondola closes behind Susie with a loud clicking noise.
She settles into one of the seats, attempting—and failing—to ignore the biting nerves that have plagued her since she woke up.
(And before she went to sleep. And before before she went to sleep.)
Susie glances up at Noelle, sitting across from her with her hands folded neatly in her lap.
Noelle looks beautiful.
She always does, with her shy smile, the permanent blush on her face that always seems to rise in Susie's presence, the way she laughs so softly and it makes her face scrunch up—
But there's just… something different about her today. Susie can't quite put her finger on it but she knows it's true.
Their eyes meet as Noelle looks up through her eyelashes, a small smile spreading across her lips that Susie can't help but mirror. Then, the Ferris wheel is springing to life with a worrying chugging noise. The gondola lurches slightly making Noelle yelp a quiet noise of surprise as Susie tries to suppress her own shock. Noelle is laughing at her when the gondola finally begins to move at a normal, steady pace upwards. Susie flushes.
"Sorry— the face you made, Susie," Noelle says, putting in no effort to stifle her giggles. "Did it scare you?"
"No! I just…" she scratches the back of her neck awkwardly, heat blooming across her cheeks, "wasn't expecting it, is all. Caught me off guard, y'know." She clears her throat, avoiding Noelle's awaiting gaze as she searches desperately for a way to change the topic.
"Bad sound to hear from the thing you're stuck in," Susie says after a moment. "You think it's gonna fall apart and explode? Maybe if we're lucky it'll shoot us away from the rest of the Ferris wheel really hard, like a bowling ball."
Noelle is laughing again, like tiny bells on a garland ringing as they're hung above a well-loved fireplace, her shoulders shaking with the force of it. Susie decides (or maybe she decided a long time ago) that it's one of her favorite sounds.
"Susie!" Noelle's hand raises in a fruitless attempt to muffle her own joy. "Why would you want it to explode!"
"I don't want it to explode," she responds, matter-of-factly. "But if it does—"
"You want us to become a bowling ball."
"Now you're getting it." Susie grins. Noelle grins back. Susie thinks this might be one of the best days ever.
There's a silence between them as the gondola rises, slowly but surely, and the small space they're in fills with a tension that neither of them could possibly name. It's not hostile nor comfortable—it anticipates.
As the gondola rises above the treeline it comes to a stop, though not a sudden one. Noelle frowns.
"Did it get stuck?" she asks. Susie looks around the interior as if it could magically provide her a detailed explanation of what exactly is happening. She decides to guess.
"I think this might be as high as it goes." She glances out the window, down to where Sans is standing. Completely unbothered. Whatever. Fuck that guy.
"Kind of a shitty Ferris wheel," she says, chuckling. Noelle turns in her seat, staring out behind her. When Susie is able to catch a glimpse of her face again, Noelle is pouting.
"You can't even see the lake from up here," Noelle murmurs, almost to herself.
Susie pauses, her confidence wavering.
"At least the company makes it worth the time."
Noelle's head whips around quick enough to give someone whiplash. The obvious blush on her cheeks makes Susie's heart pound in a way that seems detrimental to her own health.
"Huh? I— sorry— I—" Noelle shakes her head and straightens out in her seat, clearing her throat as her shoulders go rigid.
"Don't worry about the view of the lake," Susie tells her, gently bumping her foot against Noelle's in a way that she hopes comes across as affectionate and not antagonistic. "We can just… enjoy some Susie and Noelle time, right?"
Noelle looks like every every part of her mind has ceased their functions.
"I— yeah— I—" she exhales, her hands unclenching in her lap. She relaxes, her eyes eagerly seeking Susie's.
"Susie and Noelle time," she agrees, twin smiles appearing on both of their faces. She bumps her foot against Susie's. It becomes a game—one that requires zero words but communicates a thousand. It leaves a light feeling floating around in Susie's chest, one she's never felt before.
Their time in the sky isn't endless and, eventually, the gondola begins to descend. They talk about everything and nothing. Noelle tells a story about Kris throwing dirt at her and her sister when they were children. Susie listens like it's the most important thing in the world. They wave to Kris and laugh at the fact that they missed it because their eyes were closed.
There's a feeling in Susie's chest. In her heart. Like its made a home there for itself. She doesn't know how long it's been there, but she becomes acutely aware that it has likely been a long time.
She spends the entire day wondering what it is, seeing its face and trying her damn hardest to remember its name. Spends the entire time in the gondola studying every minute detail of Noelle's face, how her expression changes while she talks.
As the sun dips behind the trees, casting rays of orange and yellow light through their leaves and down upon the reindeer girl held tightly in Susie's arms, the warm hues making her glow like an angel, it comes to her.
I love you.
It doesn't feel… grand. Not in the way that she had always expected falling in love to. It's just true—a simple fact of the universe. There is a sun in the sky. There is water in the lake, in the clouds, in the rivers and the streams. Susie loves Noelle.
For a single moment she could swear that their heartbeats sync.
For a single moment, as she stands knee-deep in cool lake water, cradling the girl that she loves against her chest, everything feels alright.
I guess I'm in love.