Archive of Our Own

Ever since he could remember, Chicago had always been hit by at least one heatwave in summer, and this year was no exception. What made it unbearable wasn’t only the heat; it was the mixture between the sun pushing the thermometer to 90 degrees within a few days and the thick humidity that settled over the city like a blanket of steam from a too hot bath. It wasn’t an issue if you could laze around the beach, enjoy a cool drink and the breeze from the lake. Casey, however, did have no such luxury.

He’d been beyond excited when he finally got the letter from the CFD he’d been waiting for so long. But as happy as the prospect of going to the Fire Academy made him, it also meant he had to take all the extra work he could get before classes were about to begin so he could save up enough money to pay the rent during the three-month training, the tight schedule not really allowing him to work a side job.

His boss hadn’t been thrilled by the news. And that probably was the reason why he bullied him even more than he already used to. The man had always been a tyrant, and for some reason he had it in for Casey in particular. Not that it surprised Casey; people didn’t usually like him; and there was usually someone around who bullied him. He didn’t care; he was used to it, learned from an early age that the only person he could rely on was himself.

He didn’t complain. He did the jobs he was told to, thoroughly. Most days, he simply ignored the snarky remarks from both his boss and co-workers. As the youngster in the team, he was supposed to be picked on anyway, and of course he was supposed to do the work no-one else wanted to do. And he didn’t know it any different, having went through his father’s upbringing after all.

Today was hard though. Construction work was always hard in the summer heat, especially if there was no protection from the sun on the site. From his EMT training he knew you needed to be careful, take enough breaks, hydrate properly.

His boss didn’t care much about any of that. It was no surprise for Casey that he was rushed about all day, climbed up and down the scaffolding dozens of times, and spent high noon doing roofing work. Every time he dared take a moment for a sip of water, his boss would catch him, accuse him of lazing about, and sent him off to deal with the next difficult task. More than once, he was tempted to take off his shirt, sweat running down his back and gluing the fabric uncomfortably to his skin. The only reason he didn’t was because he didn’t want to risk sunburn on his back. Another reason for the others to tease him and call him a pussy. Casey gritted his teeth and ignored them. The heat was getting to him, especially in the long afternoon hours, the sun continuing to burn down mercilessly and the air standing still, pooling between the houses, as if the city were an oven.

By the end of the day, Casey thought he must have lost half his weight in sweat. He stood beside his truck, emptying half a bottle of water in one go. It didn’t sit right with his stomach, making him feel a bit queasy; he’d probably drank too fast. His head was pounding, skin in his neck and on his arms burning. He couldn’t wait for a shower and a cool beer.

When about half an hour later, he finally pulled the door to the apartment close behind him, Casey was totally spent. All he wanted was to shower and crash; he didn’t even have the energy left to care about something to eat. His roommate didn’t seem to be home, which suited Casey just fine. The guy was nice enough, and he really liked him, but he hadn’t quite gotten used to a roommate yet. The only reason he had to find one was because otherwise, he wouldn’t be able to afford the rent. He had been struggling ever since his boyfriend broke it off and moved out, and even though admittedly, he hadn’t treated him well and once the initial hurt was over he found he was actually better off without him, the second income still lacked. Especially since Casey’s boss made it clear he wouldn’t take him back once he had completed his training at the Fire Academy, and if he wasn’t lucky enough to be picked as a candidate by one of the firehouses in the city right away, he would have to find himself a new job.

Casey crossed the kitchen and opened the fridge to take a bottle of Gatorade out. He hadn’t drunken nearly enough over the day, thanks to his boss and co-workers who never let him take a proper break, and his head was pounding unpleasantly. But after the first greedy gulp, his stomach was rolling uneasily again, and he slowed down, padding to the bathroom with the bottle in his hand. Strangely, although he was still sweating from every pore, he felt shivers run through his body. Before he could make any sense of it, a sudden dizziness hit him, and he reached for the doorframe to hold himself upright. He missed it, his legs buckling beneath him, and he blinked confused while the floor slowly tilted.

Next thing he knew, he was lying on the floor, looking up into his roommate’s face, his urging voice muffled like through cotton. “Come on, Case, open your eyes for me.”

The pounding in his head had intensified twofold. He blinked sluggishly, the face above him still blurry. “Wha… what ‘append.” Trying to sit up turned out to be a bad idea, his stomach suddenly flipping, and he barely managed to turn to the side before it emptied itself in one violent heave. Not that it held much to empty in the first place.

“Whoa, take it easy.” His roommate’s hands reached for him, and he flinched on instinct, not expecting anything good.

“S-sorry…” Another heave, and to his surprise, the hands gently held him while he brought up some more bile before carefully guiding him to lie on his side. Remarkably strong hands, preventing his second attempt to sit up easily.

“Better stay down for a moment. – What happened, Case? I just found you passed out on the floor.”

Casey frowned a little, not having gotten used to the other man’s weird habit of calling him “Case” yet. Though he had to admit that he kind of liked it – and he pretty much immediately called the other one “Sev” as an abbreviation of his last name, so he guessed it was only fair. “Don’t… don’t remember. Was about to take a shower…” He felt over the back of his pounding head. Was there something wet on his fingers? His arm felt too heavy to bother checking it, and there was another shiver running through his body. Weird, that he would freeze on such a hot day.

“Did you hit your head?” Severide was now busy checking as well, and he swore through gritted teeth. “Maye I’d better call an ambulance.”

That got Casey moving, and quickly. “No.” He sat up, the movement making him dizzy again, and he leant against the doorframe, panting. Sweat was beading on his forehead, sticking to his hot and burning body. Why where his limbs so heavy? And how was it he was freezing, when his skin felt so hot? “’m fine. Just need a moment.”

“The hell you are.” His roommate’s expression was grim while he scrutinised him from head to toe before feeling his forehead. Again, those strong hands were surprisingly tender. “Geez, man, you’re burning up. Have you been working all day?” He wet a washcloth, carefully wiped it over Casey’s face. The cooling sensation was soothing, but still, he couldn’t help that he slightly flinched again, not expecting such gentle care but rather some harsh reprimanding. “Yeah.”

“Outside?” Severide pressed the washcloth to his neck, which hurt unexpectedly, causing Casey to flinch yet again. The other man frowned but urged him to answer the question while he continued to check him over.

“Roofing, mostly”, Casey mumbled. Which caused the other man to swear again.

“Roofing? In that heat? Is your boss out of his mind?”

“Nah, he simply hates me.” He smiled faintly, leaning his head against the doorframe since the world was tilting around him again. Severide crouched before him, giving him an earnest look.

“Listen, bud… I think you have heatstroke. Also, you hit your head, probably from falling when you lost consciousness. The laceration’s not so bad that it needs stitches, but you should get checked for a concussion… and you definitely need fluids. I really think it would be best to take you to the hospital.”

Of course, he would say that. He already was a firefighter, after all. And deep down Casey knew what he said was sensible.

But he simply hated hospitals. For various reasons. And part of his brain still couldn’t comprehend that there was someone who actually wanted to help him. Eyes fixed on the mess he made on the floor, he mumbled, “Only need to shower… I’ll clean up, sorry for the mess.” All he needed was to get the heat from his skin. And a blanket, so he wouldn’t freeze anymore.

“Did you even listen to what I said?” Severide’s intense blue eyes bore into him. He had the most extraordinary eyes. It was the first Casey noticed about him the day he came to check the offered room. “Heatstroke is serious, it can be life-threatening even.” Casey couldn’t meet his gaze, turning away.

“Then ‘m gonna die, who cares”, he murmured, not realising how down his guard was at this moment. All he could think about was that he didn’t, under no circumstances, wanted to go to the hospital. Be at the mercy of strangers. Be poked at by a dozen of different hands within the hour, barked at by unfriendly doctors, manhandled by overworked nurses with no patience for a frightened child. And he might not be that child anymore, but the prospect seemed worse than closing his eyes right here in his roommate’s arms to never open them again.

Said roommate’s voice sounded sad, shocked even. “Is your own life worth so little to you?” Casey shrugged, not even having an answer to that question. He forced his eyes open again, fixed his gaze on Severide, wide and pleading.

“No ‘spital, please”, he begged. “Please… can you just… help me shower. I’ll be fine, only need to rest. Please.”

The other man was quiet for a while, wiping the cool cloth over his face again. “Alright”, he said finally, “here’s the deal: I have a friend who’s a paramedic. I’ll ask her to come by, and you let yourself be checked by her. If she says hospital, it’s hospital… and otherwise, you’ll listen to what she, or I, tell you to do.”

For some reason, while looking into his extraordinary eyes, his physical presence so close he could feel it, those words sent a pleasant shiver down Casey’s spine. Or maybe it was just because he was freezing. Either way, Casey felt too tired to argue, and he knew it was the best he could get, so he nodded. “Okay.”

He had met Shay once or twice before, occasions on which he’d gotten the initial impression that she was quite the party girl. Now, he learned quickly that she was absolutely no-nonsense in a professional matter, bluntly telling hi he was an idiot for refusing to be checked out at the hospital. Also, for working unprotected in the summer heat all day without taking proper breaks and hydrating adequately, but that really wasn’t his fault. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t tried to stay hydrated.

Severide had helped him shower while Shay had been on her way over, cleaning all the sweat and grime from his body. For a moment, Casey had been deeply embarrassed about needing help to even get undressed. But he simply hadn’t been in any condition to get rid of the heavy working trousers by himself, let alone shower, still dizzy and barely able to coordinate his movements. And so, he’d closed his eyes and ignored the fact that the other man got to see everything while he was the one unfairly attractive, and he tried not to think about how surprisingly soft and gentle the touch of his hands was while he washed him with lukewarm water, tried not to imagine that those hands would do anything else but help him wash. Severide was not into men; that was pretty obvious from he way he flirted with every girl that looked his way. And even if he was, Casey wasn’t stupid enough to think a guy as attractive as Severide would ever be interested in him. The sort of people who were drawn to him were usually those who realised they could push him around. Like his last boyfriend. Sadly enough, it was often those kinds of guys he felt drawn to.

But even if by any chance, Severide would be interested in him, he still wouldn’t know that Casey was into men, since he hadn’t come out to him yet and wasn’t planning on doing so. The Fire Department wasn’t exactly known to be a welcoming environment for gay men, and as far as Casey was concerned, nobody needed to learn that about him. He guessed that Severide might be a bit more open, since he was best friends with Shay, who was openly gay. But then again, she was a woman, and men often tolerated gay women better than gay men, and if only because they didn’t take them seriously while a gay man somehow seemed to be a threat. So, no, he wasn’t planning on coming out to anyone. If he had to his co-workers, they would call him much worse than pussy. Play him much worse pranks than hide his tools or lock him in the mobile toilet for two hours.

By now, Casey lay propped up in his bed, cooling packs in his neck and groin to bring his temperature down, while Shay was busy to hook him up on a saline drip. She’d concluded that he wasn’t concussed, that luckily, he hadn’t bumped his head too bad, and the dizziness and vomiting was due to the heatstroke. The only reason she spared him the trip to the hospital was because she was able to provide him with an IV, and once she’d set it up, she told him sternly, “There you go. I still want you to drink as much as you can, since hydration is key. Only take small sips, don’t overwhelm your stomach. I’ll stay overnight, and if you aren’t getting better within the hour, or if I see only the slightest sign that you are getting worse, it’s still a trip to the hospital. Understood?”

He nodded, feeling much better already now that he was cleaned up, cooled down, and rehydrating. “Thanks, Shay. Really appreciate you doing this.” Especially since she barely knew him, didn’t owe him anything.

“Oh, Kelly’s the one you should be thanking. He was quite insistent I do anything to make sure you didn’t have to go to the hospital. While everyone in his right senses simply would’ve called an ambulance.” Although she complained about Severide, she was also smiling fondly, and Casey thought that his roommate could count himself lucky to have her as a friend. She lightly patted his knee. “Get some rest now. I’ll check on you later… Oh, and just so you know, I’m gay, so don’t even think about trying anything.”

Casey’s brows knitted in confusion, and slight annoyance. “Why would you say that?!”

“Because I know you guys, never letting out a chance to hit on a girl you consider hot. And I’m hot, and I don’t want to deal with any of that.”

“I’m not on of those guys”, Casey defended himself, feeling genuinely offended. Although he knew, of course, that most of his fellow men had no such boundaries, and he could imagine that Shay experienced a lot of unpleasant things in the course of her daily work, and he figured he couldn’t hold it against her that she tried to get ahead of things.

“Well then, you might be a very rare exception. I mean, your friend out there, he’s a pretty great guy most of the time, but he still wouldn’t have skipped the chance to hit on the hot paramedic if he were in your shoes.” His mushed-up brain not quite catching up, he got hung up on the one word that threw him off track because he simply couldn’t associate it with himself.

“He’s not my friend.”

Shay gaped for a second or two, as if he’d said something weird. “No? – Well, he’ll be thoroughly disappointed to hear that.” That, Casey understood even less, and he stated, “Why, it’s simply how it is. We only have been roommates for a few weeks; we barely know each other.” Didn’t matter how much he liked the idea of actually having Severide as a friend – he didn’t have friends, and he learned a long time ago that it was better to not get his hopes up.

“True, but I know for a fact that he likes you, and that he wants to be your friend”, Shay replied. Casey's eyes slowly drifted shut, he didn’t have the energy to keep them open any longer. Shay’s voice washed over him like a slow wave lulling him to sleep.

“Why would he want to be my friend if he doesn’t know me?”

“Maybe because he likes you, and he wants to get to know you.”

“Nobody wants to get to know me.”

“You’re weird, Matt Casey, you know that?”

“Yeah, that’s why nobody wants to be my friend.” Sensing how Shay leaned a little towards him, he tiredly blinked his eyes open again. There was a certain glint in her eyes.

“He likes you”, she emphasised. “And besides, Kelly Severide makes a damn great friend, you’d be stupid to not take him when you can get him.”

Now, he was completely and utterly confused. “How’d you mean that, he likes me?” She grinned mischievously.

“I might know that he has a crush on you. But I haven’t said anything… and I’ll let you rest now.” She patted his arm, getting up. Casey’s eyes were already drifting shut again, sleep pulling at him, and he didn’t even realise himself mumbling, “’s not that I didn’t want to… but he can’t learn I’m into men, it’ll only scare him away, and I don’ want him to move out, like havin’ him around.” Didn’t see the little triumphant smile on Shay’s face.

Severide looked anxiously at Shay when she finally came out of Casey’s room. Finding his roommate passed out on bathroom threshold when he came home had deeply disturbed him, and he was worried about the blonde. He’d been confused when he came to, much more vulnerable than he’d ever seen him. Which shouldn’t be surprising, considering the state he was in, and Severide had to admit he didn’t know a lot about the guy he had only lived with for about two months. Not more than that he was kind, very reserved, and very good looking. That a thought he pushed away quickly when Shay flopped down next to him on the sofa.

“So, I do have good and bad news. Which one do you want to hear first?” She seemed relaxed, which probably was a good sign, but Severide still was exasperated.

“How do you mean, bad news? How’s he, does he need to go to the hospital?” He didn’t know why it was Casey so vehemently pleaded for him to not take him there, but when he looked at him with his wide blue eyes, he had gotten a glimpse from a pain, a fear deep within him, and he’d had no choice but to do everything in his might to spare him. He also hadn’t failed to notice how he flinched more than once when he touched him, and it made him wonder if there was some kind of trauma behind it. Something else that deeply disturbed him and made him realise how little he knew about his roommate.

“Relax, Kelly, he’s going to be fine”, Shay hastened to reassure him. “He’s not concussed; his temperature is not alarmingly high. You’ve already taken care of the sunburn, and I hooked him up on fluids. I’ll stay around to make sure he’ll get better over the next couple of hours, but I don’t think he’ll need that trip to the hospital.”

Severide let out the breath he didn’t know he’d been holding, slumping into the cushions beside her. “Thank God. I really got quite the scare when I found him.” Shay squeezed his arm.

“He’ll be fine”, she repeated, albeit frowning in slight annoyance. “But someone has to have a serious talk to his asshole boss. That was negligent, let him work on the roof all day in the middle of a heat wave.”

“Yeah, from what I understand, his boss is quite the slavedriver. But luckily he’ll be rid of him once he starts CFD training.” Not that Casey was too fond about losing his job; actually, he seemed quite worried about it. Severide, on the other hand, didn’t think he needed to worry; from what he’d seen so far, Casey was a decent guy and a hard worker. He sure would ace at the academy and be probably able to pick a house for his candidacy at the end of his training.

Severide had been excited when he learned his roommate-to-be was going to be a firefighter just like him. Casey told him the day he came by to check out the offered room, saying the upcoming training was the reason he needed to share the rent. Casey had been intrigued to learn he already was a firefighter, having completed his training only a few months ago, and they ended up talking half of the night. Severide moved in only a day later.

“What was it you said about good and bad news?”

Shay made herself comfortable against the cushions and grabbed for the remote. “Get me a beer and I’ll tell you.” Rolling his eyes, but more fondly than annoyed, Severide got up to fetch two bottles from the fridge. Handing her one, he plopped down beside her again, pleased that she chose the sports channel.

“Now, shoot.”

“Alright. Which one do you want to hear first, good or bad?”

“Good?” He was focused on the screen, pleased to find the Hawks were leading.

“Casey’s into men. Which means, you got a chance.”

He almost choked on his beer. “Wha- why would you think that I wanted a chance with Casey?” Despite his attempt to deny it, he felt himself blush deeply.

“Because”, Shay poked a finger at him, “you’ve got a massive crush on him. And don’t even try to talk yourself out of it, as your best friend, I’ve watched you pining ever since the day you moved in.”

“’m not pining”, Severide mumbled, fiddling with the label on his beer bottle.

“You are”, Shay insisted. “Which, by the way, is nothing to be ashamed about. And if I were into man, I would say you got taste, Casey certainly is something for the eye.” That made him blush even deeper, because yes, he thought Casey was gorgeous. Tall, all lean but with strong muscle, blue eyes under blonde hair, those faint freckles around his nose, and the way his face lit up when he smiled… Yes, he so totally had a crush on his roommate.

“He really told you he’s into men?” Severide found that hard to believe; despite all his attempts to befriend the man, he hadn’t learnt a lot about him ever since he moved in. Other than he was very private, and that he wasn’t currently dating anyone. That at least he had managed to worm out of him one night he succeeded in dragging him into a bar.

“To be fair, he was pretty out of it, so I don’t think he actually intended to tell me. I think he’s afraid you’ll resent him once you learn. Which brings me to the bad news: he said you weren’t his friend.”

“He – he said that?” It hit Severide like a sledgehammer. Did Casey not like him? Had he done anything wrong? He knew he could be a jerk, and he was said to be a cocky bastard, which he guessed was true, but still – he really thought they had clicked well, that they could make great friends. They’d even hung out together most evenings he was home, watching some game or visiting the bar down the road. Casey had eagerly soaked up the stories from the firehouse, asked him everything there was to ask about the academy and how to best prepare, and when he gave him a tour on a day they’d both been off, he’d been so excited. That had actually been the day Severide admitted to himself he was attracted to Casey.

But Casey didn’t even consider him his friend.

He ruffled his hair, feeling totally discouraged. And no, there weren’t tears building up in his eyes. A ridiculous thought. If Casey didn’t want to be his friend, then so be it. It wasn’t as if he was dependant on him; he didn’t usually have trouble making friends.

“Hey.” Shay put a hand on his knee, giving him a slightly pitying look. “It doesn’t have to mean a lot. He said something like he didn’t have friends, because he was weird… Maybe he simply didn’t want to assume, I mean, it’s not as if you’d known each other for that long. And you’re always telling me, he’s very private, he keeps his guard up. Maybe he just doesn’t want anyone to get to close. Doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you.”

Severide scoffed. It was true; Casey was guarded, and while he always was polite and seemed forthcoming at first sight, Severide hadn’t failed to notice he actually held everybody at arm’s length. Very subtly so, but he did. Stupid to think he was any exception to that. “If he doesn’t want me as a friend, it’s fine, he can just keep to himself.”

Now, Shay scowled at him. “That’s not what he said, dumbass. What he said is that he isn’t someone people usually befriend, so he simply doesn’t believe you would want to befriend him. It’s a defence mechanism. Of course, you can pull back and pout now, fulfil his expectations. Or you get over your wounded pride and prove to him that you are his friend.” She turned her attention to the game. “He said he liked to have you around, but I think he’s afraid to get hurt. So, all I was trying to say is, you’ll have to come up with something to show him that you’re interested in his friendship. Or more, if that is what you want.”

Severide leant back, thoughts kind of jumbled, not quite knowing what to make of this, and he groaned inwardly, part of him thinking, why did she have to tell him about this, about Casey being into men and then, after getting his hopes up for a second, crushing them by saying Casey didn’t see him as a friend.

If only she’d kept that to herself. Now, he would be completely tense around Casey. And Casey would feel vindicated in his belief that they weren’t friends. And knowing himself, he would probably fuck it all up before he actually got a chance.

Casey woke from someone rustling beside him, and he blinked his eyes slowly open, expecting Shay who had been in twice during the night. To his surprise, he saw Severide’s dark head instead, the young firefighter carefully disconnecting the empty saline drip. Watching him from under half-closed lids, he found that the other man looked tired, as if he hadn’t slept all night. His hair was a mess, and his cheeks unshaven, a look that suited him unfairly. Casey couldn’t help himself but smile, imagining for just a moment how his strong and yet gentle hands had felt against his skin last night when he rubbed the lotion into his sunburned skin.

Obviously not having expected him to be awake, Severide jumped the second he noticed his eyes on him. “Geez, you scared me to death.” Suddenly, there was something tense about him, and Casey frowned, wondering if he’d done something wrong. Perhaps Severide was just annoyed that he’d had to take care of him instead of having a relaxed night off. He couldn’t hold that against him.

Slowly, he pushed himself into a sitting position, pleased to find that the worst of the dizziness was gone. The skin on his arms and neck hurt though, and he winced slightly at the movement. “Sorry… didn’t mean to.”

“Are you feeling better?” Severide didn’t really look at him, and Casey’s heart sank some more. After Shay said that the other man liked him, he’d actually allowed himself the small hope that they could indeed be friends, if nothing more which he didn’t dare hope (and yes, he had secretly admired Severide’s looks on more than one occasion, he was unfairly attractive). Casey never had a real friend, but Severide, he’d liked immediately. He was easy to be around, despite of him being a bit too much attracted to him than he should.

“Lots. Thanks for looking after me.”

“Of course.” Severide smiled a little, already on the retreat. Pushing through his disappointment, Casey swung his legs out of bed. It was already light outside and his boss wouldn’t be amused if he was late.

He wasn’t expecting the wave of dizziness hitting him when he got up, immediately swiping him off his feet, leaving dark shadows dancing before his eyes. A strong grip around his upper arm was the only reason he didn’t fall face forward to the floor, but back against the cushions.

“What do you think you’re doing?!” Severide’s gruff voice hit his ear. He blinked a little, looking up into his face, seeing a glimpse of worry in the beautiful blue eyes.

“Need to get to work”, he managed, trying to push himself up again. Severide held him back with a hand against his chest.

“No way, Case. Did you forget that you got heatstroke? All you’re doing today is rest.”

“I’ll get fired”, he protested weakly. But he didn’t push the hand away that lay warm against his chest, right over his heart, and it suddenly took up a beat.

“Which wouldn’t be the worst, considering how your boss is treating you. Seriously, bud, you’re in no condition to get up, let alone work construction. I won’t let you out of the house, and if I have to stand guard at the door all day.” He was deadly serious, and for some reason, it warmed Casey’s heart, and he found himself smiling. Still, he thought Severide surely had better things to do but to take care of him.

“You don’t have to watch out for me.” It came out harsher than he’d intended, and as soon as the words had left his mouth, Severide took a step back, sounding all defensive.

“What if I wanted to.” He didn’t look at him, and Casey was at a loss, not knowing what he should make of all this.

“Why would you want that”, he asked, more vulnerability to his voice than he would like. Severide cast him a quick glance, and was there uncertainty flickering through his eyes? The firefighter rubbed a hand over his head, and that probably was what had gotten his hair all messed up.

“Because you obviously need someone who does. And because… because I might like you.”

Casey had never seen his roommate be anything but bursting with confidence. It was something he’d admired about him from the very first moment. That and his fast thinking and quick grin. To see him standing there, beside his bed, displaying raw emotion and something like… vulnerability was unexpected. And yet, it stirred something in him.

“I might like you too”, he whispered, feeling himself blush a little. He wasn’t usually that direct. In fact, he usually kept himself strictly guarded. If you don’t show feelings, nobody can hurt them, that was the motto that brought him more or less unscathed through the last couple of years. Maybe less than more, but still. Trust wasn’t something he was offering easily.

There was a shy smile forming on Severide’s lips. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“So… if I told you I called your boss and told him that he was an irresponsible asshole, and that you wouldn’t work another day for him unless over my dead body, you wouldn’t rip my head off?”

Casey gaped at him, the blood draining from his face at first. But surprisingly, instead of panic, a strange kind of calm settled over him, and something like – relief. He shook his head with a soft smile. “I wouldn’t. In fact, I’d much rather give you a hug.”

“That I’ll gladly take.” Severide moved, and seconds later, Casey found himself wrapped in his strong arms.

“Hey, I wanted to give you that hug”, he protested. But he wasn’t about to complain, not really.

“Fair enough.” Severide pulled back a little, looking him in the eye. “Seriously though. You shouldn’t be working for that slavedriver anymore. There’s a guy at my firehouse who works construction as a side job, if you want I can ask him if he knows about something.”

“You would do that? For me?” It sounded odd to him; someone using his contacts to try and help wasn’t something that happened to him.

“Of course, if you want me to.”

This time, it was his arms coming around Severide. “Thanks. I really like you.” The other man chuckled against his neck.

“Good. ‘Cause for a moment, I was afraid you actually didn’t like me.” His breath against his skin sent a shiver down Casey’s spine. Still, he frowned, pulling back a little.

“What makes you think that?”

Severide shrugged, looking sheepishly away. “Just… just something Shay said last night.” Casey’s frown deepened, not really remembering what he and Shay talked about.

“And what was that`?”

“Nothing, just… something that got me spiralling a little.” Severide tried to laugh it off, but Casey could see that he was still bothered, and he insisted, “What did she say? Because if you don’t tell me, I will be spiralling from here on.”

“Alright, but don’t give her hell for it, okay? – She said you told her we weren’t friends. And that got me thinking, since I thought we were friends, but I know we haven’t known each other that long, and maybe I got worked up over it a little too much, but it made me think you didn’t like me.”

“Oh.” Casey cast his eyes down, suddenly feeling ashamed. “It’s not that I don’t want us to be friends… I like having you around… it’s just… people don’t normally – people usually don’t want to be my friend, and I didn’t think you would be any different. Not that I didn’t hope you would.” He shyly looked at Severide from under his lashes, thinking that his rambling that probably didn’t make much sense only made everything worse. But Severide surprised him once again, pulling him against his side and kissing his temple.

“How about we agree on that this is the start of a friendship, and we’ll see where it takes us”, he suggested.

“I’d like that.” And just to emphasise that he wasn’t opposed to something beyond friendship, Casey dared to shyly kiss his roommate’s scratchy cheek. “I do like you.”

“Good.” Severide smiled, rubbing a hand over his back. “Because I like you, too.”