Chapter Text
The door's handle is hot from the sun. When I get inside, Hirose is sitting with Nakamura. Hirose is always sitting with Nakamura. That's nothing new. Kōsei is there ahead of me, making Funny Face Number Five while he talks to Nakamura. If there's one person who likes the guy less than me, it's Kōsei. What a thing to bond over. I have enough time to plaster on a smile as I sit down. If Hirose can always be with Nakamura... But that's not the same, is it?
+
Hirose, Takeuchi decided, was sick. Or possibly crazy. He'd been hanging out with Nakamura too much, that had to be it.
And now, he was sitting on Nakamura's desk with his feet kicking in the air. Yeah, so he was the perfect picture of innocence and joy, with his bright smile and wide open body language, but it was all pointed at Nakamura, like a ray of sunshine trying to light up the bottom of a cave.
And. It. Was. Working.
Nakamura smiled up at Hirose like he was the only person there. He'd cut his bangs recently, Takeuchi thought, and his characteristically gloomy face was attentive and energetic.
"Is Hirose... okay?" Takeuchi said.
Oomori snorted, bumping past him to start putting his things down. Takeuchi followed him towards their desks.
"Oh, he's more than okay," Oomori said. "He's actually happy. Finally. I was starting to worry, what with Sakamoto and all."
Takeuchi failed to tear his eyes away from where Hirose was leaning in to look at a meme on Nakamura's phone. "Yeah, why did he break up with her, anyway?"
Oomori stopped in front of him. Takeuchi didn't notice until they'd collided.
"Seriously?"
Takeuchi shrank back a bit from the raw are-you-stupid in Oomori's eyes. Oomori looked from him back to Hirose. He looked back again, and then back to Hirose.
"Takeuchi, you are the third dumbest guy I've ever met."
Takeuchi looked over at Hirose again. He was laughing about something, then leaning down to talk to Nakamura, his hair bouncing happily around his head.
"Who's the dumbest?" Takeuchi knew he was gonna regret learning the answer to that one, but he asked anyways.
"It goes Hirose, Nakamura, you." Oomori continued off to his desk. Takeuchi kept watching Hirose.
Hirose kept leaning down to talk to Nakamura. Nakamura kept smiling that weird, goofy smile that looked so much weirder and goofier than Hirose's. Hirose laughed loudly a couple of times. Nakamura said something that got Hirose to lean in close again, but this time, he turned his head and Nakamura's fingers came up to cup over his ear. Nakamura whispered into his fingers and Hirose turned a really nice pinkish color. Salmon, maybe? He sat up straight, then hopped off the desk. He turned to Nakamura, and swatted him on the shoulder, then, just loud enough that Takeuchi could catch it, he said "maybe. If you behave yourself."
Nakamura turned a very pleased fruit-punch color.
Hirose blushed furiously on the way to his seat. When he looked up at Takeuchi, his blush got even darker and holy shit he was dating Nakamura. Hirose Aiki was dating Nakamura what'shisname. Hirose. Was dating. Nakamura.
Nakamura. Nakamura Nakamura, like, Nakamura.
And Hirose was dating him.
As in they were going out. Like a couple.
Takeuchi hated it.
He shook himself and hurried to his seat.
Hirose was quiet all the way until lunch. It gave Takeuchi plenty of time to think. There was no mistaking what he'd seen. In fact, it seemed like he'd accidentally witnessed a fairly saucy exchange, one that he really wished he hadn't.
At least part of that wish stemmed from the uncomfortable light of self-discovery. The instant he realized what he'd seen, he wished he'd gone over and pulled them apart. The image was immediate and disturbingly tangible in his head. He could imagine pushing Nakamura away from his friend, pulling a startled Hirose away, and...
And what?
That was where he got stuck.
In the middle of that imagined scene, imaginary Hirose could only stare at him with hurt and betrayal, and imaginary Takeuchi could only demand that Hirose not date Nakamura. His mind refused to offer up any more justification than that it made him angry to see it, and he didn't want to look beneath that undeniable fact to the dark implication of what lay beneath it.
He wasn't some sort of small-minded bigot. He'd spent a year abroad in the United States of America and he'd made friends with all of the kids from all sorts of different racial whatevers, and he'd always been probably the kindest in his family to his cousin who wasn't a girl anymore. But apparently, put a gay couple in front of him and he'd lose his entire fucking shit.
He didn't want to be a homophobe. He wanted to support his friend, probably his best friend in the world, who was wonderful and deserved the best. But he couldn't even look at Hirose without picturing Nakamura and his fucking smirk, and that made him want to chew his desk to pieces.
When lunch came around, he practically sprinted to Yuuka. Asking the expert seemed like a great idea. She was starting out of the classroom with her friends, but he caught up and croaked "Yuuka, wait up a second."
She turned and raised an eyebrow at him. He stepped up close. Yuuka's friends were staring at him with rapt attention. He cleared his throat. Watched Hirose and Nakamura going by. Watched Oomori follow them. Cleared his throat again.
"Is it just me, or are Hirose and Nakamura, like, an item?"
Okay, yeah, that'd have to do.
Yuuka looked at him like he'd burst into flames for a moment, and then her face lit up. "They definitely are! Kawamura says they've had a really adorable mutual crush on each other for months, but she saw them holding hands on the way out of school yesterday."
Kawamura, having been named, seemed to animate suddenly, like she'd been holding her breath. "I did. It was really sweet. And once, Nakamura asked me for a drawing of Hirose I made in art class. He said he was a fan of my work, but I think he was just a fan of Hirose."
Takeuchi blinked. "Probably both. I've seen some of your stuff: you're good. I guess any boy who's obsessed with Hirose would want a picture you drew of him." The girls started walking again, and he fell into step with them. Kawamura blushed really hard at the compliment. "How long have they been together?"
"Since Valentine's Day, I think," Okuda said. "We're pretty sure Hirose confessed to Nakamura after school. Nakamura is obviously the shy type."
"I dunno, I think he's pretty bold," Takeuchi grumbled, remembering Nakamura whispering in Hirose's ear.
Ugh.
Fuck Nakamura.
Right. He had a goal. Get to the bottom of his unexpected streak of bigotry. "Is everyone just... Fine with it?"
"I think it's super romantic," Yuuka said. "I bet it's so thrilling for a boy to fall in love with another boy like that. I wish I could feel like that."
Takeuchi felt himself blushing. "I mean, if you just want to fall in love with a boy, nothing is stopping you."
This was the fucking problem with consulting Yuuka about Hirose and Nakamura. Now he was confused and flustered and frustrated.
She sighed. "But I don't want to fall in love with a boy as a girl! That's just boring!"
Suddenly, Takeuchi was glad he hadn't suggested she try falling in love with him. He wasn't sure how well he'd have handled that particular rejection. The girls started wandering off topic, and Takeuchi went to eat lunch no more enlightened than he had been before, except that now he was certain Hirose and Nakamura were dating, and it made him furious.
The rest of the day was a buzzy blur of not very much interesting, interspersed with resentful glares at Nakamura whenever he spoke to Hirose, until classes let out for the day.
And Hirose and Nakamura approached him before he could leave.
Fuck.
Takeuchi looked up at the ceiling. He sat back at his desk. He contemplated spontaneous human combustion.
"Um, hi, Takeuchi," Hirose said. "I think you might already know what I'm gonna tell you, but Oku... Uh, Nakamura says I should talk to you, so I won't keep being anxious."
Okuto. He'd been hearing them call each other by their given names for weeks, but it hadn't grated on him like this before.
Hirose's face was turned down when Takeuchi looked down from the ceiling. He looked sad, and nervous. It kinda sucked all the air out of the room. Nakamura stood behind him, like he was getting ready to defend his boyfriend.
Takeuchi had never really noticed how intimidating Nakamura could be.
"I'm. Um. I'm gay." Hirose took a deep breath. "And I'm dating Nakamura."
Takeuchi forced himself not to scream. "I. Uh. I noticed. You guys don't think you're subtle, do you?" Did he sound bitter? Angry? Neutral? He could only hope for neutral.
Apparently, he missed neutral, if the way Nakamura tensed was any indication.
"I'm sorry," Hirose said. "I meant to tell you, but I... It's been a... kind of a crazy couple of weeks. I mean, first I had to tell Hana, and then I spent, like, a whole week sorta... going crazy? And then me and Nakamura have been kinda preoccupied with each other. So I just... Never got around to it. I didn't mean to leave you out of the loop. I wanted you to find out directly from me."
"I'd say this morning counts as finding out directly from you," Takeuchi said.
That one definitely came out bitter.
Nakamura took a step forward. Takeuchi winced. Nakamura's face was red. He looked grim, angry. Maybe slightly cool, which didn't help Takeuchi to feel better about the fact that he was about to get his lights punched out by the shy, unathletic octopus guy.
Fuck, the cockroach incident took on a whole new life in this context.
Great, he was going to be beaten into unconsciousness while thinking about Hirose with his hand up Nakamura's shirt.
Nakamura bowed to him like a character in a show about salarymen having boring conversations with each other. "I'm sorry, Takeuchi. I know I've been monopolizing Hirose's time. It's important for him to be able to spend time with his friends, too, and he would have told you sooner if I hadn't been so selfish."
That was not a punch. It didn't help to cool the simmering anger that came with the sight of Nakamura, but it added enough confusion to unfreeze him. He pinched the bridge of his nose until it hurt, and he took a deep breath.
"No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't be mad. I should be happy for you. I just need to... get over it." He forced himself to smile at Hirose. He was aware that it was crooked and wrong. "I guess I'm just... surprised. Is all. Hirose, are we still on for Saturday?"
Hirose blinked, obviously searching his memory for what was going on Saturday. Takeuchi could see the moment he got it, his little frown turning into a smile that finally brought some of the air back into the classroom. "The mall, yeah? Definitely."
Takeuchi braced himself for the unpleasant part. "Why don't you come too, Nakamura? If you're dating my friend, I should get to know you better, right?"
Nakamura nodded. "Okay. Saturday." He smiled, still smirky, but hopeful. "I'm looking forward to it."
Hirose and Nakamura left hand in hand. Takeuchi glared at their hands. He walked home in a daze, earbuds playing some song he wasn't paying attention to from an album he couldn't name from a band he couldn't identify.
What the fuck had today even been?