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Raphael was drifting out of consciousness when the sensation of a warm body slinking into the spot next to him roused him out of the borders of sleep.
The movement was so furtive that, to most, it would have gone unnoticed. But Raphael, unlike most, sensed these things.
Raph liked to credit this ability to his ninja-training, though in reality it was his constant paranoia which kept him on edge. Not to mention, more often than not, it was more of a curse than a skill.
Raphael was always a worry wort--hence, his “Raph-Chasm”--but ever since the day of the invasion, his anxiety had worsened nearly tenfold.
But despite Raph’s tense nature, he didn’t pay the uninvited guest even a single flinch when he felt them shuffle beneath his blankets.
Because he knew exactly who this was.
“Leo, just ‘cause you can’t sleep don’t mean you gotta wake me up, too.”
Mumbling into a pillow, Leo attempted his trademark wry tone, but the effect was diminished by the tiredness in his voice.
“I tried being sneaky.”
Throwing an exhausted arm over his face, Raph groaned into his own bicep.
When his little brother didn’t respond to his show of exasperation, Raphael let his arm fall back into its typical place, at his side. He turned his head to face Leo, laying eyes upon his curled-up form.
He was twisted in Raph’s sheets, with his forehead resting on his knees. A pathetic heap of green flesh and fuzzy cushioning.
Raph raised his arm once more, and laid a single hand on the back of Leo’s shell, caressing him there in small circles.
Leo sighed, sinking into the bed with the full weight of his fatigued body.
“I’m here for you, Leo.”
Leo said nothing in return. The only sound he offered was his labored breathing, growing heavier as sleep supposedly overtook him.
Raph wasn’t surprised--he never got more than a single sentence out of Leo during nights like this.
This routine had been in motion since all those months ago, after they defeated the Krang. Leo would slip into Raph’s room in the middle of the night, wordlessly lying in his older brother’s company.
Every morning, when Raph awoke, Leo was gone without a trace. Every time Raph tried to talk to Leo about this habit, he would brush it off, saying he must’ve been “sleepwalking”.
Eventually, Raphael concluded that Leo was putting so much effort keeping this whole situation under wraps because he didn’t want to be a bother.
Raph couldn’t really blame Leo for that…
If Mikey found out about it, no doubt he would pull one of his classic “Dr. Feelings” spiels.
Donnie on the other hand would most likely be perturbed at any sign of mental instability in Leo, distressed by the emotional discomfort.
Though, perhaps, Leo just… didn’t want to seem weak to his other brothers.
After all, he was their leader now.
Raph knew what it was like to carry that title. Its phantom weight still lingered, as did the insecurity and fear that it carried.
Perhaps that was why Leo chose Raph’s presence over the other’s; this unspoken understanding between the two.
A weary smile crawled its way onto Raph’s face. The expression was not of gladness, but of the depressing empathy of shared trauma.
He never wanted either of them to have experienced the torture of such a duty…
But if anyone had to carry it, Raph would rather it was himself.
Yet as much as he wishes he was still leader, Raphael had to admit that Leo was taking up the responsibility beautifully. He had always been cunning, with unmatched strategic prowess, but the way Leo grew into the role with a renewed level of maturity unlike anything he had possessed before…
It was incredible.
In a matter of months, Leo had developed more than anyone could have predicted he was capable of.
Mulling this over, Raphael came to a realization.
To Leo, these nights were the few glimpses he had of his past self: every day, aging and wisening, it must be a frighteningly quick process to him.
But here, snuggling up against his older brother, Leo could allow himself to feel helpless again.
To be protected, rather than the protector.
Then in the morning, he would have to return. Return to his current life, having to face the person he has become.
Raphael held his sleeping brother to his chest, and murmured his thoughts aloud.
“You know, you’re shaping up to be a true leader, Leo.”
To Raph’s surprise, Leo heard him.
“...You mean it?”
Raphael smiled--really smiled--and squeezed his baby brother in a tight hug.
“Yeah. A real hero.”
Leo released a breathy chuckle into Raph’s plastron.
“Thanks, big brother.”