Archive of Our Own

They liked to say that the whole thing started because of the tumblr video, but it really went back further than that.

For Anthony, it started at the end of a drunken night with Hanbon and some others years before Bunch of Friends was even an idea. Anthony didn’t even know Coy and he wasn’t close with Will, at that point. It was just the two of them, growing closer through various channels and projects and their day to day lives. 

It had been a quiet admission. He would’ve missed it, if he wasn’t as attentive as he was. 

“I feel like a kid sometimes,” Hanbon had whispered, her words slurred by too many drinks and impending sleep as Anthony tucked her into bed. He’d leave a cup of water and some advil on her bedside table, too, because he always found himself taking care of her. 

It felt like where he was meant to be, a role he fell into naturally. 

He faltered lightly, wondering how comprehensible she was trying to be, just then. Wondering if she’d remember this in the morning. 

He tilted his head, humoring her for the time being, “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” she continued whispering, near childishly, as if this were a secret to be kept between the two of them. She fiddled with the soft blanket in her fingers, bunching up and pulling at the fabric like she did with her hoodie sleeves when she was nervous, “I’ve been trying to figure out how to tell you, because you’re like, my best friend. And I want to trust you with it.” 

He sat on the edge of the mattress, then, taking a slight look of concern, “It? What’s it, bon?” 

She squeezed her eyes shut, “I’m sleepy and not making sense.” 

“Not really. But I’m here to listen anyways.” Anthony reached out a hand to her, which she took and squeezed gently like she did when she needed grounding.

Her makeup had been removed at this point, and she had clumsily changed into a too-big t-shirt that definitely didn’t belong to her. Her hair was rustled, crimped in places from the braided style she had it in earlier in the night. She looked sweet.

“It’s called age regression.” She explained, “You can learn more- look it up. Or I’ll teach you later. But I feel like a kid, basically. I had a therapist who recommended it. And I’ve wanted you to know but have been too stressed to tell you but you’re here and you’re so kind to me and-” 

She sounded emotional, then, in the way she tended to get sappy whenever she was drunk and reminded of the people that loved her. Anthony squeezed her hand, 

“Hey, hey.” he interrupted her softly, “I’ll look it up. And you’ll teach me. But you don’t have to be stressed. You can trust me.” 

He said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. It was. 

“I know.” she smiled sleepily, pulling his hand closer to her face, “I love you, Ant.” 

“I love you too, bon.” he mused, “I think we both need sleep, okay? I’ll call you in the morning.” 

She pouted but let go of his hand, nodding, “You better.” 

And when he woke up the next morning, he did look it up, filtering through articles and online definitions and terms he hadn’t really heard before. Maybe he had passed it by online at some point and scrolled along because it wasn’t relevant to him then. Now, it was. 

He didn’t fully understand everything he was looking at right away, but he got it enough to align it with his vision of his friend. 

The way she sometimes got softer at the edges- she’d reach out for a hand to hold while crossing the street and he’d give one to her because he’d do anything to make her feel better.

It was good for mental health when done properly, the articles said. Hanbon would say so too, when he called her. She would apologize for dropping it on him that late at night and he would assure that it was okay, that he wanted to be someone she trusted enough to share this with.

Her best friend who sometimes took care of her, too. When she needed it. 

That’s how it started for them. Eventually, Anthony would come to like being a caregiver- to need it as much as Hanbon needed her regression. It would be a sweet back and forth that made sense for them. 

There were pieces missing that they hadn’t noticed then, but it worked for them. 

--

For Coy, it had started during his mid-teen years during the pandemic.

He had noticed something- how he was drawn to stuffed animals and childish things and sometimes, felt soft and fuzzy in a way he couldn’t explain. One morning, when they woke up with their thumb in their mouth and couldn’t ignore it anymore, the internet had the explanation for him, all laid out and logical like a piece of a puzzle they were trying to put together. 

Regressing on his own, watching cartoons and eating prepackaged snacks because making a meal seemed too big of a feat just then, sufficed enough to fill the urge that bubbled up now and then. 

When they got a bit older and more social, this urge occurred less and less often and was easier to ignore when it did arise. By the time he was living in New Jersey and working on Bunch of Friends, he hadn’t really needed to regress in years. 

Not that he hadn’t wanted to. Giving in when he was in a house full of his friends was risky, though, because he knew he would want to walk down the hall to one of their rooms to say hello and that couldn’t happen because how would he explain any of it? How would they react?

They didn’t need to regress anymore, so they didn’t.

He could never bring himself to get rid of his small collection of toys and tidbits, though- the Winnie the Pooh stuffed bear or the sensory cube he had given in and bought himself after he had finally accepted this as a coping skill that worked for him. Not across all of his moves, or the couch surfing. 

They stayed tucked in a wooden box he had painted pastel colored stars on, currently tucked under his bed in his bedroom, just in case he ever needed it. 

Not that they ever would. 

--

Will almost hadn’t noticed that sometimes, he felt younger, because it felt like returning to a part of himself that was there anyways. 

He liked video games and eating chips crushed onto sandwiches and being hyper as an adult. For him, the headspace just meant acting slightly more like a kid while doing these things he liked already. 

Maybe he bought a water bottle from the kid’s section at Walmart because it had Minecraft creepers on it, but it wasn’t like it was a sippy cup or anything. It just wouldn’t spill or make a large crashing sound when it fell over, which was convenient. 

At his youngest, his logic stopped making sense (‘bedtime is for losers’, etc) and he felt clumsier, but it was easy not to think about it too hard for a while.

The only reason he had put it together was because he happened across a video on reels about age regression during a late night after editing a Bunch of Friends video, back when they still spun the wheel to decide who would edit. 

After a bit of scrolling and searching different tags, it had clicked that this is what he had been doing whenever he got too immersed in a video game or while watching different animes. He wasn’t an age regressor in the pacifier-bottle-toys-toddler sense but in the video games-social media-old movies sense, landing somewhere in the seven to fourteen age range. 

He felt a little silly about it, all the sudden, not noticing that whatever he had been doing was a Thing. A thing he did for fun rather than some deep coping or dealing with stress like others on the internet said they did. He didn’t necessarily need it, but it also didn’t hurt anyone. 

It was easy to tuck away, to do on his own because taking care of himself came so easily. 

Yeah, maybe he opted for Doritos and candy instead of full meals, but it would suffice and he could eat vegetables when he felt his own age again. 

--

Hanbon and Anthony had to carefully plan their regression days for when Will and Coy were out, and it rarely lined up in a way that made sense for them. They would swap secret text messages and glances like they were trying to execute a crime. 

Sometimes, it was kind of fun- like a game they were playing. 

Other times, Anthony tried to convince Hanbon that Will and Coy would never judge her for a coping skill. 

“I don’t wanna risk it.” she insisted, shaking her head like she always did when she didn’t like something while small. “It scares me too much.” 

“Telling me was scary and you still did it.” Anthony reminded her, gentle as always. He tied off her hair as he finished braiding it back, spinning her slightly by the shoulders so he could look her in the face. As he adjusted the strands of hair that he left out at the front, “And look how that turned out, hm? I think they would love to play with you while small.” 

She scrunched up her nose, “I was drunk when I told you.” she pointed out. 

“Okay. I’ll try again when you’re big.” he tapped the tip of her nose with the decision, “I just mean that it would be nice to not have to sneak around.” 

“I guess so.” she shrugged, seemingly grateful that he dropped it and looking back to the mirror to admire her new braids. She beamed, all sugar sweet and sunshine, “Thank you!” 

Her words were high pitched and clumsy, but Anthony had been in this game long enough to know what she was saying. He smiled back at her, 

“You’re welcome, baby.” 

They would have the potential, big and scary conversation later. For now, though, they had coloring pages to attend to and only a few hours before Coy and Will would return from their errands.

--

The tumblr video was an odd idea in the first place, but it offered some comedic merit, so they had all agreed to it when Will suggested it during their last planning meeting. He was the one with the least experience on the website, so it was mostly centered around him clicking through and making their blog and falling down tag rabbit holes while the others made jokes and hinted towards their own tumblr experiences. 

The trending page led to fandom blogs led him to gay ships they made jokes about and memes they only half-understood and it was funny. 

In the depths of tags for one fandom or another, where was a post headcannoning a character as a regressor. Will paused, lingering over the tags for just a moment as he moved to scroll away. But then, on a whim- 

He clicked the #agere tag, as if he didn’t know what it would lead to. There was the plausible deniability that he didn’t know what he was getting into, he supposed. It was a way to see how the others reacted. It wasn’t a plan, but it was something curious. 

For a moment, all the joking that had been going on stopped. 

Watching back the footage, there was the briefest moment where Hanbon inched closer to Anthony, shooting him a nervous glance. At the same time, Coy scanned the screen, his eyes shifting in recognition, curiosity too. The next moment, they’re all acting as if they’re waiting for the others to say something. 

Anthony is the one that breaks the tension, voice careful, “What is this? How’d we get here?” 

“He obviously clicked on something he didn’t mean to.” Coy stated plainly, “Falling down rabbit holes.” 

“That’s the point of the video, hello.” Will said, and instead of clicking back, he scrolls down, exploring the ‘top posts’ in the agere tag. He didn’t know that there was such an active community on tumblr for it, honestly. In his research, he hadn’t thought to check the website. 

There’s moodboards of soft things that didn’t appeal to him so much, alphabet blocks and stacks of soft blankets and pacifiers. There’s text posts he doesn’t really stop to read that he vaguely registers as being about shows the poster likes while small, or various crayon drawings. 

Then, there’s a post that’s also tagged #teen regressor and #big brother regressor with aesthetic shots of colorful and sticker-covered nintendo 3DS’s and pixelated game characters and wrists covered in kandi bracelets and it resonates in a way most of the age regression community hadn’t whenever Will had looked. He liked the post and Coy audibly gasped. 

Will looked over to him and Coy jumped to explain his reaction, “You just interacted with some random niche community in the depths of tumblr. You just altered the course of the universe.” 

“Seems dramatic, but okay.” Anthony chuckled, and the tension starts to ease a bit. 

“It’s video games. I like video games.” Will shrugged. 

“Unlike it, unlike it. What if someone recognizes us in the notes?” Hanbon panics and takes the mouse. She doesn’t clarify why it would be a bad thing if a fan saw that the Bunch of Friends tumblr blog liked an agere post, and no one questions it. 

“We have to be environmentally friendly.” Coy agrees, “Liking a post this deep in a rabbit hole is like building a rock tower in nature. It could disrupt the wildlife.” 

He’s playfully serious. Silly and lighthearted. 

None of them ask what they’re looking at, but none of them address the topic directly. No one makes a judgey joke about the moodboards with baby bottles or toys but no one makes any admissions, either. 

It’s enough to get them all thinking about it. 

Eventually, they’re going back to the trending page and going in on a new fandom, and they don’t end up back in any age regression adjacent tags before they wrap up filming. Will agrees to compile the footage to send it over to their editors, since they were now a big enough channel to employ a few. 

If he cuts out the chunk of footage spent in the age regression tags and saves it to his laptop before any of the editors or the public could see it, then that’s no one’s business but his own. 

If he watches back this footage and tries to understand the other’s reactions, bit by bit and frame by frame, then that was also his own business. 

--

“I told you they wouldn’t judge the concept.” Anthony told Hanbon when they’re in the kitchen making a late-night snack while Will’s compiling footage and Coy was busy doing whatever he did when he shut himself in his room. 

“Shh.” Hanbon told him, “I still don’t really know what that was. If I didn’t know what age regression was, I would at least ask what I was looking at if I stumbled into a tag. The toys and stuff- I would be confused. It was a little weird, right?” 

“Maybe they know what it is. We’ve all been on the internet forever, basically.” Anthony tried. 

“Or maybe they just didn’t understand.” Hanbon shook her head to herself, “I don’t know.” 

“We don’t have to make any decisions now.” Anthony reminded her, placing a gentle hand on her wrist where she was stretching the fabric of her sweater, “I think it’s just-” 

“Worth thinking about.” she cut him off and finished his sentence, “I know. And I know they’re our friends and would never truly judge me. I just need time, I guess. I wanted to tell you for months before I finally gave in.” 

“Okay, sweetheart.” Anthony nodded, “Thank you for considering it. I know it’s scary.” 

She mirrored his nodding motion, and she’s quick to fall into his embrace when he opens his arms. He sways them, just lightly, not letting go until she does. 

It’s something he had picked up online when researching how to be a good caregiver, when he had no idea what he was doing just yet. You should let the kid take as much as they need when and where possible. And even if Hanbon wasn’t regressed just then, the same principle applied. 

He would always try his best to give her what she needed. 

--

“The editors completely cut out the bit where I joked about being environmentally friendly.” Coy sounded a bit disappointed as he stood in the doorway of Will’s room after the video went up, “That was a funny joke, I thought.” 

“Oh.” Something vaguely resembling guilt flashed across Will’s face, then, “It was funny. I cut that chunk from the footage before I sent it over. I really don’t want to disrupt the age regression community. If that had stayed in the video, fans could’ve reacted badly and made others feel bad.” 

He explains it simply and casually, and Coy blinks at him because this is the first time any of them directly referred to age regression as a concept. 

“That makes sense.” he nodded. “I didn’t know you knew about age regression.” 

“I don’t.” Will tried to lie, and then he blinks because that didn’t make any sense. Coy stepped fully into Will’s room, then, shutting the door behind them. “I mean- I don’t know much. I only learned about it recently.” 

That was honest, at least.

“How?” Coy questioned, inviting themselves to sit on the edge of Will’s bed like he belonged there. 

“How do you know about the age regression community?” Will challenged instead of answering him, spinning his office chair around so that he was facing him again. Coy bit his lip and shifted in his spot. “You don’t have to answer. But I don’t think I will either.” 

“Unfair.” Coy claimed. 

“I think that’s really fair, actually.” Will argued. Still, the other boy pouted. There’s a few moments of silence where Coy grabs for the softest blanket on Will’s bed, running their fingers over it as they thought through their next words. 

There’s tension between them, then, of words unsaid and suspicions unspoken. They both knew about the concept of age regression for one reason or another, and neither of them were being outwardly judgemental about it. 

The unsaid words were only a formality. 

“You won’t tell the others?” Coy finally said, and Will nodded. 

“Same for me?” he asked, and Coy agreed easily. 

“Um, okay. I’ve never told anyone this before.” he prefaced, and it takes about beat and a deep breath before they continue,  “I used to regress when I was younger. I didn’t know what I was doing as first but I eventually researched it and for a while, I did it regularly. Like, a few times a week.” 

“Not anymore, though?” Will questioned, and Coy shrugged. 

“I get really small and it’s not easy to pull myself out of it if like, someone knocks on my door. And I’m afraid that I would want to hang out with my friends if I did regress. It would be hard to suppress the urge to go barge into someone’s room if I did it here.” 

It feels nice to open up about it, Coy realizes. Some of the tension around their shoulders goes away, and it feels like it was never that big of a deal. Not with their friends, anyways. 

“I also don’t need it anymore. It’s rare that I feel the urge to, anyways.” Coy added quickly. 

“I see.” Will nodded, “Okay. I regress too, but to older ages. Like seven to fourteen. I play video games and watch old movies and can take care of myself okay. I didn’t realize that it wasn’t normal for a long time. I only learned that there was a name for it recently.” 

“Is that why you liked that post?” Coy questioned, and Will hummed, 

“That’s why I liked that post.” Will confirmed. “In the moment, I figured that if any of you reacted badly, I could just pretend to be clueless and click out. And if you didn’t, maybe it would be something we could talk about.” 

“I’m glad it’s something we can talk about.” Coy motioned between the two of them, “I don’t know about the others. The way bon panicked and unliked the post- I’m worried she thinks it’s weird, or something.” 

“I couldn’t tell you either.” Will agreed, “I don’t think they would judge if we took the time to explain it, probably.” 

“That’s easier for you to say, though.” Coy pointed out, “I’m like, actually a baby. There’s a difference between acting a bit younger while playing Minecraft and like, not being able to talk and using a sippy cup.” 

“You use a sippy cup?” Will tilted his head, and it’s innocent curiosity but Coy’s face goes pink. 

“No.” He denied, but then he amends, “I did back when I used to regress regularly.” 

“You know, if you ever wanted to regress with me, that would be okay.” Will told him. “You don’t have to be shy about it. You can watch cartoons while I play a game, or something.” 

“No, I-” Coy goes to reject it but pauses, shaking his head, “I get too little.” 

“I don’t think that’s a thing.” Will disagreed, “You wouldn’t say my regression is bad because I’m older. I’m serious- I can watch you. I might not be good at it, but ten year olds babysit their little siblings all the time, don’t they?” 

Coy couldn’t argue that, and it’s hard to try when they get stuck on the idea of regressing and being Will’s younger sibling, even if just for a few hours. “I just haven’t done it in a long time. But I’ll think about it?” 

“Yeah, okay.” Will nodded. “There’s no pressure, obviously. It’s kind of just a relief that I can talk to someone about it.” 

“Mm.” Coy nodded. Then, they leaned forward slightly, “Did you at least keep the footage? Of my funny joke?” 

Will gave an amused smile, “Well, of course.” 

He turns back to his computer again to pull it up, and it’s all casual like they hadn’t swapped sensitive secrets with each other. 

Casual is what Coy needed, just then. 

--

“They cut the agere section from the video.” Hanbon told Anthony, bursting into his room and pacing around but not before shutting the door firmly behind her. “What if Will realized it was weird and cut it out? What if-” 

“Whoa, okay. We’re spiraling.” Anthony got out of his gaming chair and came over to her. He blocked her pacing path and she looked up at him, wide-eyed and a bit flushed. “I think we might be jumping to conclusions, hm?” 

He offers his hands and she stares at them stubbornly for a moment before giving in and taking them. He squeezed her hands gently in the way he knew grounded her. 

“Deep breaths.” he reminded, and he demonstrates the motion and she copies him like they’ve done plenty of times over the years. 

“I’m sorry.” she apologized, “I just- I don’t know.” 

“It’s okay. You don’t have to apologize.” Anthony told her, and it’s firm enough for her to believe him but gentle enough not to worry her. “This is normal, yeah? You’re thinking about sharing a sensitive part of yourself with your friends and you’re worried it won’t go well. Being anxious is normal.” 

“I need more time.” she said. 

“No one’s rushing you, bon.” Anthony assured, “I bet that the editors just didn’t think it was worth keeping in. Or maybe Coy was serious about not wanting to ‘disrupt the ecosystem’ and Will or Coy cut it out. There’s a million reasons it didn’t end up in the video that aren’t ‘our friends think it’s weird.’” 

“Right, right.” Hanbon nodded to herself. She pulled her hands out of his, “Okay, I’m fine now. You can go back to whatever you were doing.” 

“I was just playing Minecraft. You can sit with me, if you’d like?” he offered, and she nodded. 

She wouldn’t regress, because Will and Coy were still in the house and that was too risky, but she could enjoy his company just fine. 

--

There aren’t any developments until their next filming day- a ‘redecorating each other’s rooms’ challenge that was Hanbon’s idea. It made sense that she was the only one who thought far enough ahead to back all of her regression items inside a bag and stuff clothes on top of them and shove it in the back of her closet. 

The closest they get to it during the video is Anthony pinning up fairy lights around the mirror of the back of the closet door. 

“Bro, you have a 3DS?” Anthony unearthed Will’s handheld device while they’re adding trinkets to his desk, and Will laughs it off with a shrug, 

“It’s from when I was like, nine. It still works, though.” he tells them, “Do you like the Pokemon stickers?” 

“I do.” Anthony mused, “This is awesome, Will. I don’t know where my old one even is..” 

Coy is the one filming as Anthony flips it over a few times before handing it back to Will. Then, he pans over to Hanbon as she gasps, 

“Is this is kid’s Minecraft cup?” she asked, brandishing it and sloshing around whatever liquid was left inside. Will seemed slightly more embarrassed by that, snatching it back, 

“It was in the water bottle section.” He defended lightly, “It’s practical.” 

There’s a bit of laughter, but none of it is truly making fun of him. Maybe Coy and Will make eye contact while the camera is on the other two, but they move on quickly. 

Then, they’re in Coy’s bedroom, putting posters on the wall and shifting things around. He honestly wasn’t sure why Anthony looked under his bed at all. 

“Why is this thing hidden? The stars are cute.” he commented, and maybe he’s teasing a little as he shows that camera the wooden box with various stars painted onto it. Coy panics, shoving the camera into Will’s hands and snatching the box away before any of them can process what’s happening. 

There’s a rattling sound with the movement that makes Anthony furrow his eyebrows, “What’s in the box, Coy?” 

“I don’t want to tell you.” Coy stated immediately, “This video idea was stupid- why are we just touching each other’s stuff, anyway?” 

Hanbon looked a bit dejected by this in a way the camera didn’t quite catch but everyone else did, her eyes following Coy as he goes to put the box in his closet. 

Anthony seems concerned but pushes down the urge to ask them what he was really feeling- why he was so sensitive about that box, what he could do to make it better. Instead, he just nods in the way he does when he realizes that he needs to change course while taking care of Hanbon- that he’s being too harsh or too gentle or too loud and needs to shift. 

“Okay, I’m sorry. Is there anything else you don’t want us to touch?” he asked. Coy faltered, seemingly confused by his kindness. 

They scan their room with their eyes, catching on the Winnie the Pooh plush on his bed. They walked over to pick it up, tucking it in their arms- gently so. 

“Are you doing to put it back on the bed when we’re done? I think he matches your bedding well.” Hanbon asked as she started to adjust his pillows. 

“It’s silly.” he tried, “I don’t even know why he’s- why it’s on the bed. I can put him away.” 

“I think he’s cute.” Anthony cut in, voice soft and guiding like it got when Hanbon was starting to slip. 

Hanbon notices this, glancing over to Will who was still filming. Will was busy watching over Coy in concern. 

They always brushed off anything related to their regression as silly or stupid the few times it did come up in conversation between the two of them, clearly insecure about it in a way Will hadn’t experienced himself. 

“Yeah!” Hanbon agreed, “We’ll tuck him in. Or, you’ll tuck him in, because you don’t want us to touch him.” 

Coy seemed confused by this, shifting their weight between one foot and the other for a moment. “Okay.” he nodded before looking to Hanbon, “I’m sorry I called your video idea stupid. I didn’t mean it. The box is just personal.” 

“It’s okay.” She smiled at him, and Will and Anthony feel like they’re watching two kids make up after an argument on the playground. 

Neither of them are regressed, of course, but they’re softer around the edges. Sweeter, maybe. 

They go back to their usual bits and jokes soon after that, and Coy keeps his stuffed bear tucked in his arms for the rest of the footage in his room and tucks it into his bed before they move onto Anthony’s. Maybe Anthony lets some gentle praise slip, telling him that the bear looks very comfortable, but it’s not audible to the camera. 

Coy is the one to compile the footage this time, and he carefully cuts out the video of him freaking out about the box and the comforting about the stuffed bear, keeping it tucked away on his desktop before sending the rest of the footage over to the editors. 

Maybe he feels childishly guilty for calling the video idea stupid and snatching the box away from Anthony all over again, but he would be okay. 

--

Will is the one to sneak to Coy’s room later that night, a blanket pulled around his shoulders and his 3DS and plenty of snacks in tow, all piled up in his arms in a way that makes it hard to knock on the door. 

When Coy opens the door, they’re dressed in soft pajamas and they seem a little out of it. They blink at Will a few times, obviously putting a lot of thought into his words before he says them, “What’s up? I got the footage sent over already.” 

“I thought we could hang out, if you’re not too tired. Or have a sleepover?” Will felt right on the edge of regressing himself, honestly. It was a voluntary affair for him, so he was just waiting to see if Coy wanted to be with him. 

“Um.” Coy looked back into their room, and Will is able to see that they had their wooden box sitting on their bedside table and that their Winnie the Pooh plush had been moved from it’s tucked-in spot from earlier in the day. “Okay.” 

He stepped aside to let Will in, shutting the door behind him. 

“Are you okay after earlier?” Will deposited his various snacks onto the bed- sour gummy worms and graham crackers and multiple flavors of potato chips. 

“I’m fine.” Coy shrugged, “I didn’t mean to freak out.” 

“Everyone already said it’s okay. We moved on.” Will told him, looking over to the wooden box on the bedside table, “Is this where you keep your regression stuff?” 

Coy took a moment before nodding, “I hadn’t touched it since I moved in before today.”

“Are you thinking about regressing?” Will asked carefully, and Coy flushed slightly. 

“It’s stupid.” he insisted, “I don’t need to.” 

“But if you want to, I’m here.” Will said, “And I don’t think it’s stupid. I plan on regressing if that’s okay with you?” 

“Mm.” Coy nodded, “Are you gonna play your game?” 

“My DS? Yeah.” he nodded, “I could show you!” 

He climbed onto the bed, setting to work rearranging the pillows so that they could be comfortable. He positions the snacks around him and leaves a spot open for Coy right next to him, but the other boy doesn’t climb into the bed until he’s prompted by Will patting the empty space on the mattress. 

“Okay, so boom.” Will opens the handheld device once they’re both comfortable and makes silly sound effects as he navigates through the menu, “Let’s make you a Mii, okay?” 

“Okay.” Coy smiles at that, glancing up at him, but he’s still a bit tense around the shoulders. 

“Oh, I can share.” Will adjusts the blanket around himself so that it wraps around both of them, and then motions to his stuffed bear on the other end of the bed, “Do you want him?” 

“Yes, please.” Coy nodded, all quiet and polite. Will moved slowly and carefully, handling the stuffed bear like it was a highly delicate object, as he handed it over. Coy squeezed their arms around it and tucked their chin over the top of it’s head. “Thank you.” 

“Of course. Tell me if you need something, okay?” Will told him as he set to work on an avatar for him. “I brought snacks if you want them.” 

“Not hungry.” Coy shook his head, leaning into him and glancing up as if to check that it was okay. Will shifted to make the position more comfortable, smiling at him, 

“Should we put you in a little sweater? A green one?” Will asked, scrolling through some of the options. Coy made a small sound, not quite a word but not quite a babble, pointing to the screen once he saw something he liked. Will agreed easily, “Okay, yes, that one is good.” 

They continued this way, with Coy quietly prompting whenever Will scrolled over an option they liked for their avatar, never saying too many words at a time. They kept their face buried in their bear and curled up as if they were trying to hide away from the world. 

“What do you think?” Will showed him the Mii once it was finished, tilting the screen towards him slightly in case he couldn’t see it. For a moment, Coy didn’t respond, blinking. 

He looked up at Will with a pleasant expression the other boy couldn’t read. They tried to open their mouth to speak, but only a small giggle came out, all soft and airy. They bring their hands together to clap a few times, and Will smiled. 

“That’s a ‘good’, I think.” Will muttered, more to himself than anything. Then, he saves everything before shutting his DS. “What do you like to do when you’re small?” 

Coy didn’t answer, furrowing their eyebrows like this confused them. Just when Will was going to say something else, ask another question, they pointed towards their wooden box, making a motion with their hands. “Give?” 

“I can give it to you, yes.” Will confirmed, seemingly relieved to know what he wanted. He reached over to grasp the wooden-framed thing with gentle hands, handing it over to Coy, who clumsily placed it in front of them on the bed. 

He struggled, for just a moment, to slide the lid off and set it to the side. Once the contents are revealed, he closed in on themselves a bit, shifting the box away from Will, as if second guessing themselves. 

“Uh oh.” Will frowned, “You just got little. You don’t have to be shy. I promise.” 

He offered his pinky, then. He’s still big enough to know that it’s silly, but Coy’s face lit up when he saw it, so it was worth it. It takes Coy a few too many moments and a clumsy motion to wrap his pinky around Will’s, and he pulls when he does it as if checking the strength of his hook. 

Will pulls back, too, gentle enough to ensure he wouldn’t hurt the baby. 

“Can you show me the stuff in your secret box?” Will asked after pulling his pinky away. 

Coy took in a breath, “Okay.” 

It takes him longer than he should to say the word, and it comes out softer than Will had expected it too. It’s sweet. Coy leaned into his side again, as if seeking reassurance, as he pulled the box closer to them. 

He pulled out a sensory cube, first. It must have been the thing that rattled whenever Anthony had taken hold of the box. There was different colored and multi-textured fabric on each side, but it was all in muted pastel shades. 

It looked a little like something a sad beige mom on tiktok would hand her baby, with light sage greens and dusty blues, but Coy made quick work of running his hands over the bumpy side of the cube and of fiddling with the bells tied onto one corner. 

“Fav-orite.” he said, pressing it into Will’s hands. “Shake!” 

Will did as he said, smiling as the way the bells rung out and the rattle, seemingly sewn inside of the cube, joined them. “I can see why you would like it. It’s pretty fun.” 

Coy clapped his hands like he had done before, then. He returned to the box after that, pointing to a small baby bottle with a Winnie the Pooh decal and a sippy cup with animated leaves falling down the side of it, “Drink.” 

“Yes, yes.” Will nodded very seriously, as if he hadn’t figured this out himself. He let Coy continue, because it felt like the right thing to do in the moment and he didn’t want to make his friend feel awkward. 

It may have also been slightly entertaining to see him try to explain what each item was for with his limited vocabulary. 

He goes through the last few items; a few adult pacifiers in the green, brown, yellow color scheme that matched everything else and a makeshift ribbon pacifier clip to go with them. A set of small alphabet blocks, which he immediately displayed the use of by building a tower with meticulous focus before knocking it down into Will’s lap while giggling the whole time. 

He said “clean up!” when he gathered them back into the wooden box just a moment later, though, so all was well. Some of the blocks were clearly missing, and a few of them had their paint worn at the corners. 

At the bottom of the box was a few Winnie the Pooh Little Golden Books, older ones from the late 90s or early 2000s- the sort that Coy would’ve actually read as a small toddler. 

“Can you read when you’re this little?” Will questions genuinely, and Coy furrowed his eyebrows like he had earlier. He grabbed one of the books and somehow snuggled even closer to the other boy, who wrapped his arm around him tighter, before flipping it open as if to prove a point. 

Coy didn’t read any of the words on the page, however, instead opting to flip through until there was an image of Winnie the Pooh sitting on a tree trunk. He pointed to the page, and then to his stuffed bear, still tucked in one of his arms through this whole ordeal, “Same. Bear!” 

“Bear! You’re very smart.” Will complimented him. “Do you want to actually read the book? I can read it to you.” 

Coy tilted his head, like he did when he was having trouble understanding something. He wasn’t used to being with others when he was small, of having to comprehend the thoughts and requests of someone bigger than him. Will realized he wasn’t going to get an answer and flipped back to the cover, 

“Let’s try it, okay? And if you don’t like it, we can stop.” Will told him, before settling in to read out the title of the story. 

Coy doesn’t ask him to stop, but they do fall asleep halfway through. 

--

Elsewhere in the house around the same time, Anthony showed up to Hanbon’s door when it was usually the other way around.

“I have a theory.” Before Hanbon fully opens the door to let Anthony in, the caregiver is pressing into the room. 

Hanbon shut it, following him with her eyes, “Yes, of course, Anthony- you can come into my room at…ten pm.” 

She spoke sarcastically, taking a moment to glance at the time on her phone. 

“I’m sorry.” Anthony apologized, taking a seat on the edge of her mattress, “I had things I had to get done because I figured that once I had this conversation with you, it would consume our night. No emails or editing after this.” 

“Oh?” She seemed to realize that this was a little more serious than she thought, and she nervously stepped towards the bed to take the spot next to him, “Is something wrong?” 

“I think it’s a good thing.” he told her first. Then, he just comes out with it, “I think Coy is also an age regressor. Or an age dreamer. Will too, maybe.” 

This was clearly the last thing Hanbon expected. She blinked a few times before she even managed to get any words out, “What?” 

“I just noticed some things while we were filming today. Will’s creeper cup and the 3Ds-” 

“Those are fairly normal things to own.” Hanbon shut him down immediately. “Neither of those are evidence.” 

“But they are things he kept from us until today. If they were just for nostalgia, I don’t think they would be as sensitive.” Anthony told her. “I’m not fully confident on him. Coy, though- the way he got about the box with the stars on it and his bear. He got so defensive but also, soft?” 

“That’s why you were using your caregiver voice on him!” Hanbon gasped, “I thought something was up.” 

Anthony seemed thrown off, “I don’t have a caregiver voice.” 

She deadpanned, “Yes, you do.” 

She doesn’t leave room for questioning. 

“What does that even mean?” Anthony got caught up in that for a moment before waving her off and continuing on, “Anyways, I think that box has Coy’s regression stuff inside of it. It rattled when he took it from me. It could be like, a toy or something in there. That would explain why it was under his bed and why he got so upset when I was touching it without his permission.” 

“You’re going off of very little information.” Hanbon pointed out, “Like, microscopically small bits of information that could have other explanations.” 

“It would make sense with the whole bit during the tumblr video.” He continued, “They were insistent on not disrupting the peace of the agere community. And they also didn’t question anything we saw in the agere tag. I don’t know- it’s just a feeling, bon.” 

And Hanbon knew the sort of feeling that he was referring to, the soft-caregivery thing that had growth to be a part of him over the last few years. It was like an instinct, something that told him when Hanbon wasn’t being honest about her feelings and apparently, when another regressor was lurking nearby. 

“Even if you’re right, I don’t think Coy or Will would admit to it if we asked.” Hanbon told him, “If they are somehow regressors, heavy on the if, they’re probably just as scared as I am.” 

“You’re right.” Anthony nodded, and he seemed a little apprehensive then. He reached out to intertwine one of his hands with hers, squeezing in the way he did when she needed grounding or right before he told her bad news. “I think that you should tell them about your regression to open up the conversation.” 

Hanbon’s eyes widened, and she shook her head, “I don’t- there’s a million ways you could be wrong about this.” 

“Even if I am, they’re still your best friends, who both hold onto childish things and didn’t judge the concept of age regression when it came up on the internet.” Anthony explained, “Even if I’m wrong, they aren’t going to judge you. And if I’m right and we never have a conversation about it, you’re always going to wonder if there’s even a point to us sneaking around- if there ever was.” 

It takes the girl a few moments of deep breathing to ask, “How confident are you?” 

Anthony smiled, then, 

“Very.” 

--

“Oh my god.” Coy sat up in bed at some undetermined time the next morning, covering their face with their hands. Around them, scattered all over the bed and the floor below them, was the remains of their shared regression the night before.

Will started to stir, then, blinking harshly a few times as he sat up enough to prop himself up by the elbows. At some point after Coy fell asleep, he has managed to tie his usual purple bonnet around his curls before going to bed himself. 

“Why are we ‘oh my god’-ing?” he asked, “Is something happening?” 

“I actually regressed last night. I don’t remember it clearly.” Coy sounded upset about this, “I’m so sorry.” 

“Oh.” Will seemed vaguely confused, “I don’t understand why you’re apologizing.” 

“I just- I get so little and I can’t talk and I’m embarrassing.” he groaned, “I’m sorry you had to deal with that.” 

“Coy-” Will sat up fully now, rubbing at his eyes with loosely fisted hands like his body language hadn’t caught up with his brain, “I came to your room wanting to regress with you. I promise that I don’t mind. I had fun.” 

“You had fun reading a Winnie the Pooh book and letting me show you all my stuff? When I couldn’t even talk to tell you anything?” Coy asked him as if he couldn’t comprehend the concept. 

“Yes.” Will answered, and it’s honest and genuine in a way the other boy hadn’t expected. “And I think pointing to a bottle and saying ‘drink’ is a very efficient explanation of what it does.” 

He starts laughing halfway through his sentence when Coy playfully shoves a pillow against his chest. The playfulness of it all drains away the solemn energy of Coy’s anxiety on the matter, or most of it. 

“I’ve never been small with anyone else before.” Coy told him, “You’re really good with me. Thank you.” 

“It was easier than I thought it would be.” Will shrugged slightly, and then he added, very matter-of-factly, “You’re very easily entertained.”

Coy rolled his eyes, then, scanning the room, “We have to hide all of this. And get you out before we have to come up with an explanation as to why you spent the night here.” 

Will felt around on the mattress for his own phone, speaking as he produced it to check the time, “Anthony tends to work late and sleep until he has a reason to get up- and Hanbon will sleep in whenever she gets the chance. We have a decent shot at them being asleep or out of the house.” 

“Did they have plans today?” Coy got out of bed, pushing the blankets aside. He found his wooden box and it’s lid and started picking up the toys and tidbits that belonged inside of it, “I think Anthony mentioned having meetings tomorrow, but I can’t remember anything for today. And Hanbon has an appointment later this week, I think.” 

They had a shared calendar they kept on the fridge in the upstairs kitchen that detailed all of those meetings and errands. It had originally been to keep track of filming days and editing deadlines, but it spurred into a coordination tactic that helped all of them. They had jokingly referred to it as the “family calendar” a few times, and that left a soft feeling in the air that none of them admitted to enjoying out loud. 

Coy looked to Will for a response once he had gotten most of the alphabet blocks gathered up, clearly confused by him going silent as he stared at his phone screen, “Does that sound right? When was the last time you checked the calendar?” 

“Apparently there’s something new on it today. Anthony texted the group chat.” Will explained, turning his phone screen to Coy and letting him take the device. The most recent message wasn’t a long one, sent earlier that morning- earlier than Anthony would usually be awake without a something he couldn’t get out of or reschedule forcing him to be. 

hey guys i’m gonna make breakfast. pancakes and bacon and everything. come to the table when you’re awake please for a family meeting. 

“What in the actual fuck is a family meeting?” Coy asked, “This is weird, right? I’m not weird for thinking that’s suspicious?” 

“He probably just needs to talk to all of us about something, but I have no idea what it could be.” Will answered, taking his phone back. He slid the device into the pocket of his pajama pants as he got up and began helping Coy with putting his bedroom back in order, “Maybe it’s a video idea he came up with in the middle of the night. You know how he gets with big creative concepts.” 

“Yeah.” Coy hummed in agreement, “Maybe it’s something he needs us for. Either way, he’s distracted in the kitchen and Hanbon is probably with him. So we’ll live another day, or whatever.” 

Coy was clearly more concerned with keeping his regression under wraps than Will was with his, but he understood why he was more hesitant so he would leave it be. Will was honestly glad that Coy was opening up, even just a little, with him- it was better than him never regressing by a long shot. 

So, he would play along and help Coy put away everything before they treaded to the kitchen for whatever ordeal Anthony had dubbed a family meeting. 

--

Anthony had only gotten the chance to cook for Hanbon while taking care of her a few times. 

Their regression sessions were usually shorter, tucked between errands and filming sessions and meetings, and would be filled with snacks instead of full-blown meals. He hadn’t gotten to enjoy the domesticity of making her breakfast and filling up her sippy cup- or of making her dinner while she watched cartoons. 

Maybe part of him was hopeful that this breakfast with his housemates would go well, and that they would eventually be allowed to enjoy those simple things without question. 

Hanbon sat on the counter as he made the large breakfast ensemble, burning things and spilling stuff on the counter along the way because even though he tried his best as a caregiver, he wasn’t perfect. She talked through all her worries and anxieties about telling their other friends about her regression and received reassurance as many times as she needed, no matter how repetitive. 

She fiddled with her hands and snuck bites of the food, and eventually went to set the table.

It’s when she’s making her plate and Anthony is finishing up washing the bigger dishes that Will emerges from the hall, then Coy. 

“Oh my god, you were like, serious.” Coy looked around, eyeing the pancakes and cut up fruit and the sides, too.

“I set the table!” Hanbon beamed in the same positive way she always did, but Anthony could tell that she was feeling a bit anxious. 

“It looks good.” Will complimented, “Why have you decided to become a chef this morning, Anthony?” 

“I was just thinking and it helps keep my hands occupied while by brain runs.” he explained, and that much is honest even if it’s going without context. He turned off the running water and came around the counter, motioning to the table, “Sit down, dig in!” 

None of then need further permission, taking their spots around the table and passing around dishes and small talk. Coy confirmed that he got all of the footage from yesterday’s shoot sent to the editors, but none of them address him getting upset about the box or his stuffed bear. 

They all talk about staying up late without mentioning why or what exactly they were doing. 

They dance around the conversation lingering in the air, the knowledge that there was some sort of discussion yet to come. Whatever the “family meeting” would be about was yet to be addressed. 

Whenever they had slowed down on eating, when there were only scraps left on their plates and any cups of orange juice had been more or less drained, Hanbon reached over to Anthony to take his hand- in the way she did when she was drunk or emotional or being playfully clingy. Here, it comes off as anxious, hopeful, and a bit unsure. 

Anthony started, “Bon has something she wants to talk to you guys about. It’s nothing bad- it’s just something she’s decided to share. It’s a bit sensitive to her, so please be kind and gentle as she explains it, okay?” 

He gave Will and Coy a look, then, a bit unsettling and protective and something else a bit harder to define- stern, maybe, like a father would be when telling his kid to be nice to their sibling. It makes them both want to sink into their seats or apologize for something they hadn’t done wrong. 

“Of course.” Will nodded along, seeming a bit concerned.  

“Yeah, sure.” Coy realized a moment later that he needed to respond, and once he does, Hanbon takes in a shaky breath. 

“Okay, so, um.” she seemed to not know how to begin, even though Anthony knew that she had walked through what she was going to say and how she was going to say it many times. “I do this thing called age regression. It, um- it came up when we filmed the Tumblr video. It’s where-” 

“I know what age regression is.” Will cut her off, and then he winced, “Sorry. I shouldn’t have interrupted you.” 

“It’s okay.” Hanbon seemed a little relieved, shooting a look to Anthony, just briefly. “You do? You know what it is?” 

“I regress, mostly to my early teen years. I found out that there was a name for it recently.” he told her, and the words come rushing out with relief, “I clicked on the tag on tumblr to gauge your guys’s reactions, I guess, but they weren’t easy to read at all. And I cut it out of the video, because I was worried about fans being judgemental to regressors.” 

“That’s very thoughtful to keep in mind.” Anthony told Will, “And I’m glad you tested the waters, because it helped bon feel more comfortable bringing it up.” 

Hanbon looked over to Coy, then, “Do we need to explain it to you? Do you know what we’re talking about?” 

Coy had fallen quiet since Hanbon had begun her original explanation, and he looked to Will, who gave him an encouraging nod. He shook his head, 

“I know what you’re talking about.” they shifted in their seat, feeling silly for their sudden shyness because they were openly talking about something he had always been ashamed of. 

No one was going to judge him here, and he knew that. That didn’t make this not scary, though. 

But if they could share their regression with Will, then they could do scary things. 

“I regress too.” he admitted quietly, and it’s almost a whisper, “A lot smaller, and I don’t do it often. But my regression stuff was in that box Anthony found yesterday and that’s why I freaked out. I’m sorry about that, by the way.” 

“It’s alright.” Anthony told him, and his voice is incredibly gentle. “A very vulnerable part of yourself was unexpectedly treaded on by someone else. It’s normal to be anxious or upset about that. Sharing your regression should only happen when and where you want it to. We should’ve set those sorts of boundaries before filming.” 

“You’re like, mature.” Will seemed to come to a realization, looking between him and Hanbon and their still-intertwined hands, “Oh. You’re her caregiver?” 

“He read a bunch of parenting books back when he first suggested it.” Hanbon smiled teasingly, “That’s why he sounds like that.” 

Anthony rolled his eyes fondly before addressing Will again, “I have been for a few years, now. I’ve been telling her since a bit after we all moved in together that we should tell you guys, but she didn’t seriously consider it until the tumblr video.”

“I was pretty sure I wouldn’t be able to until yesterday.” she admitted, “You guys both had kid’s stuff and I figured you couldn’t judge me too much. Also, Anthony had a theory you were both regressors.” 

“How long have you known?” Coy’s eyes widened, horrified. 

“Just since yesterday.” Anthony assured, “It clicked, I guess, that we were all keeping the same secret from each other.” 

“God, that’s so stupid.” Will shook his head, “We should have just talked.” 

“We’re talking now!” Hanbon pointed out. 

“Better late than never.” Coy agreed with a touch of sarcasm, but it’s affectionate. 

“How did this happen? When?” Will motioned between Hanbon and Anthony, “I’ve always wondered how caregiver and regressor dynamics work.”

“Me too, actually.” Coy admitted, “I mean, you see regressors online talking about the idea of a caregiver, but I mostly thought they were myths made up for imagination’s sake.” 

“I’m not a myth. Or imaginary.” Anthony seemed amused by this, “Hanbon told be about her regression a few years ago because I was her best friend and she wanted to trust me with it.”

“I was also drunk.” Hanbon cut in, “But I had genuinely been wanting to tell him for months. After I actually explained it and he did his own research, he told me that if I ever wanted to not be alone while small, I could always hang out with him. Text him or call him or whatever.” 

“It took her a long time to actually take me up on this offer.” He told them, “She would act slightly more childish sometimes, when she ended up sleeping on my couch or whatever, but it was never full regression regardless of whatever reassurance I gave. She eventually broke when I bought her a Hello Kitty blanket she wanted and surprised her with it.” 

“Oh, that’s cute actually.” Coy mused, “You guys are cute. Ew.” 

Hanbon laughed, “He’s good at noticing what I want and need, I think. It was his idea to tell you guys, after all.” 

“Wait, I want to go back to storytime.” Will decided, “What happened after the Hello Kitty blanket?” 

“Oh, yes.” Anthony hummed, “Then, there were a few months of bon regressing here and there with me watching after her. It happened naturally, honestly- I liked getting to take care of her, and it helped her feel more comfortable in her regression. I eventually did more research on the concept of a caregiver, read those parenting books, and I asked her if that would be something she wanted more formally.” 

“He made me an easter basket.” Hanbon corrected, “He didn’t just ask me. He set up a whole elaborate Easter celebration where I got to be small the whole time. He committed to the bit. Don’t let him fool you into thinking he’s casual about anything ever.” 

“That’s so sweet.” Will mused, “Are we going to do holidays together like that now? Can we? I want to do an egg hunt.” 

“We can.” Anthony assured, “If and when you guys are comfortable with it, I think it would be nice to have you all regress together. I can watch over all of you, as much or as little as you guys need.” 

“I’m very independent.” Will assured, waving him off, glancing over to Coy. 

“I don’t regress often.” Coy added, but he doesn’t elaborate further on that despite the look Will shot him. “But maybe. And I’m okay with Hanbon being small around me.” 

“That’s a start.” Anthony nodded, seeming satisfied, “Okay, family meeting dismissed, or whatever.” 

None of them leave the table for a while after that, because the conversation falls into all of the things they had been hiding from each other. Things they hadn’t told anyone else that they could now talk about as a group, just the four of them. 

Coy may have been a little more closed off about the details of his regression, how small he gets, but he still tells the others when and how he learned about it. He indulges, just slightly, in his love for Winnie the Pooh. 

Will talks about video games and Hanbon talks about playing hair salon, having Anthony do her hair before she put clips and bows into his. A lot of it is Anthony and Hanbon telling silly stories and Will and Coy talking about things they had always wanted to do. Blanket fort building and making cookies and all those sorts of things.

Maybe they would get the chance to do them, now that there was no secrets within their little makeshift family. 

Maybe, they were being too hopeful in wondering if they’d be able to write regression days onto their dry erase family calendar soon.