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Shane had never used his Twitter account. He knows he has one, he had made it early on in his career, but it sat unused because Shane just didn’t care for social media.
All that to say, Shane was so bored and he had heard Hayden the other day talking about how funny some of the posts he saw were. So, he downloaded the app on his phone and logged in.
That was mistake one.
Mistake two came about a few minutes later after he scrolled through his feed for a bit and decided to search Ilya Rozanov’s name.
ellie 💘 @rozygirl81
sometimes all a girl wants is to be held down and pounded into the mattress by a 6’ Russian hockey player like is that too much to ask????
Liked by Shane Hollander ✅ @shanehollander24
Lily Hollander @lilylovesjane1410
ilya rozanov loves shane hollander. send tweet.
Liked by Shane Hollander ✅ @shanehollander24
shane hollander 🕳️ @shnehollnderhole
day 100 of praying for ilya rozanov to knock shane hollander up and and to make a beautiful hockey baby
Liked by Shane Hollander ✅ @shanehollander24
hollanov 🏒🏳️🌈 @hollanov
ILYA ROZANOV IF YOU DONT KISS SHANE HOLLANDER ON THE MOUTH DURING THE NEXT METROS vs. RAIDERS GAME THEN YOU ARE A COWARD
Liked by Shane Hollander ✅ @shanehollander24
matt 🏒 @ilyaroz81
like if you are also #HotForRozanov
Liked by Shane Hollander ✅ @shanehollander24
lexie 🦋💛🏒🔮 @lexloveshockey
ilya rozanov moles are underappreciated LET ME LICK THEM
Liked by Shane Hollander ✅ @shanehollander24
Lily Hollander @lilylovesjane1410
7 reasons why Ilya Rozanov is better than Scott Hunter
- he was not born in stone age
- Unlike Hunter, he does not reside in nursing home when not on ice
- he is not a primary source on ancient egypt
- he is not slow skater
- Hunter’s first best friend was a t-rex 🦖
- he is more beautiful and talented
- Scott Hunter is OLD
Liked by Shane Hollander ✅ @shanehollander24
xan 💖 @shanesfreckles
ilya rozanov please kiss shane on the mouth. and also everywhere else
Liked by Shane Hollander ✅ @shanehollander24
thea 🏒🏒 @hockeygal
I WANT TO LICK THE SWEAT OFF ILYA ROZANOVS ABS
Liked by Shane Hollander ✅ @shanehollander24
Lily
shane, are you on twitter right now?
Jane
?Yeah, why
Also delete that message
Lily
yes okay JANE i deleted it
now please get off twitter. also i think you need to call your manager probably
Jane
?What do you mean
Lily
please don’t panic but
your likes are public
everyone can see when you like a tweet
Jane
?Everyone
Fuck
Oh fuck
Lily
yes
you know, if you wanted to lick my abs, all you have to do was ask 😏
His phone started blowing up, getting messages from other people. He looked at some of them.
Farah
Shane, please call me.
Hayden
Holy shit, man. Funniest thing is happening LOL
Think you should call your agent though
Jackie
Please ignore Hayden. We are here for you if you need anything ❤️
Mom
Honey, I don’t want to scare you but there is something happening on your Twitter account. We can get behind it, but you need to call Farah. Love you.
Metro Boyz 4Life
Comeau
Lmao Hollzy you a fag now? 😂
Drapeau
What’s happening?
Comeau
Hollzy’s twitter account got hacked or something lol
Liking a bunch of gay tweets about Rozanov 🤮
Mitty
Fucking funny as shit man 😂😂
Shane was panicking.
Oh god, he thought. Okay, breathe. Oh fuck fuck fuck FUCK. What do I do?
Shane was freaking out, frozen in place, air not going into his lungs, when he got an idea. The guys think he’s been hacked. Why not everyone else? He could fix this.
He swiped back onto Twitter.
Shane Hollander ✅ @shanehollander24
I was hacked.
Okay. That was done. All better.
His phone started ringing a few seconds later and he picked it up.
“Shane,” Farah said, “please tell me you haven’t been on Twitter.”
Shane cleared his throat. “Uhhhh, yeah? I’m so sorry Farah, I didn’t know my likes were public—but I fixed it.”
Farah let out a deep sigh.
“Shane,” she said. “First of all, I need you to get off Twitter. Better even, if you delete the app. Second of all—can I ask why you’re liking tweets about Ilya Rozanov?”
“No, you may not.”
“Let me rephrase. Why are you liking tweets about Rozanov?”
“I was hacked?”
Farah let out a long sigh. “Try again.”
Shane said nothing for a moment. “They really resonated with me?”
“You liked a tweet about wanting him to ‘pound you into the mattress.’”
“Right.”
He didn’t know what else to say.
“Okay, I’m gonna choose to move on from that,” Farah said. “You then, as your first ever tweet, said that you were hacked.”
“Yeah,” Shane said, nodding his head despite this not being a video call. “The guys in the metros chat thought I was hacked and that stuff happens, right? So like, I said I was hacked. Now no one thinks it was actually me liking the tweets.”
“Shane,” Farah groaned, “that just makes it look like you weren’t hacked and just covering your tracks. You look even more guilty!”
“Oh, fuck. Wait, okay, hold on a second.”
Shane Hollander ✅ @shanehollander24
I was not hacked.
“Did you seriously just tweet?!” Farah exclaimed. “Shane. Listen to me. GET. OFF. TWITTER.”
“I fixed it,” Shane said. He was so confused. Surely this would fix the issue? Now people will think that he was hacked. “I—”
He was cut off as he saw he had an incoming call, the screen reading ‘Lily’.
“Shit, Farah, I have another call, one sec.”
“Shane Hollander do not hang up on me.”
He hung up and accepted Rozanov’s call. He was met with booming laughter.
“Hollander,” Rozanov spoke after he calmed down. “What are you doing?”
“I don’t know!” Shane whined. “Farah said that my tweet made me look like I wasn’t hacked! I’m just trying to fix it.”
“I do not think that this fixed things.”
“Apparently not. Fuck! What do I do?” Shane asked, voice cracking at the end.
“Okay, I have idea. I will fix,” Rozanov said.
“What is your idea?”
“We make it look like a big joke. I will make and like tweets about you.”
“How is that going to fix anything?”
“It will look like big joke, maybe like a uhhh—what do they call it? Is like homoerotic friendship?”
“You know the word homoerotic but not the word bromance?” Shane chuckled.
“Bromance!” Romanov exclaimed and Shane could hear him snap his fingers. “Yes! Big bromance. People say I have this with Marly.”
“So your plan is to make us both look gay for each other?”
“I am very gay for you, Hollander. Or, well, I am very bisexual for you, whatever.”
“Rozanov,” Shane said. “What if it doesn’t look like a bromance? What if it looks like we’re together?”
“No, no, people will not think this. They will think we are just joking.”
“And if they don’t?”
There was silence. “Is whatever then. Look, is not like there are any out gay players, people will not believe we are actually gay. Plus, everyone knows I like women a lot.”
“Yeah, no shit.”
“Jealous?”
“You’re an asshole.”
“I think you like it.”
“Maybe,” Shane said this softly, the confession sitting in between them for a few moments. “I just don’t know if it’s too risky. You don’t have to involve yourself. It’s my mess.”
“Shane,” Rozanov said, and Shane drew in a sharp breath, just from hearing his name on the other man’s lips. “I want to be involved. I do not want you to deal with this alone. I think my plan will work. Let me do this? Please?”
“Okay,” Shane whispered. “Okay, Ilya.”
“I will go on Twitter rampage now. Maybe I can call you again later tonight?”
Ilya’s voice was dripping in hope at the question, and who was Shane to say no to that?
“Yes,” Shane’s voice a little rough. He cleared it and continued, “you can call.”
They said goodbye and Shane opened up Twitter. He navigated to Ilya’s account and watched as new tweets appeared.
xan 💖 @shanesfreckles
shane hollander please give me one chance, i’m on my knees begging you please please please
Liked and 🔁 by Ilya Rozanov ✅ @ilyarozanov
Ilya Rozanov ✅ @ilyarozanov
@shanehollander24 hmu bbg 😘🥵
🔁 Lily Hollander @lilylovesjane1410
need shane hollander under me more than i need air
Shane Holeander @shanesleftnip
shane hollander nude photoshoot—WHO SAID THAT
Liked by Ilya Rozanov ✅ @ilyarozanov
shane hollander 🕳️ @shnehollnderhole
shane hollander should show hole, i feel like you should just show hole, shane hollander leak your hole pics, shane hollander please show hole just once, a lot of people are asking you, shane hollander, to show hole
Liked and 🔁 by Ilya Rozanov ✅ @ilyarozanov
Ilya Rozanov ✅ @ilyarozanov
@scotthunteradmiral OLD! @shanehollader24 is younger and more beautiful
↪️ Scott Hunter 🏒✅@scotthunteradmiral
Fuck you, Rozanov
↪️ Ilya Rozanov ✅ @ilyarozanov
No, thank you, I am spoken for❤️
Hayden Pike #35 @haydenpikeofficial
*photo of Shane holding a baby, presumably Arthur*
He loves Uncle Shane cuddles 💙
↪️ Ilya Rozanov ✅ @ilyarozanov
I do too, he’s not special
↪️ Ilya Rozanov ✅ @ilyarozanov
Also, @shanehollander24 please let me get you pregnant, I’m begging you 🙏🏻🫃
↪️ Hayden Pike #35 @haydenpikeofficial
wtf????
↪️ Ilya Rozanov ✅ @ilyarozanov
Do not speak to me, 15th best Montreal Metro
Ilya Rozanov ✅ @ilyarozanov
