Work Text:
Richie had a small skill, one he’s had since he was a teenager. He didn’t think it was particularly impressive or helpful unless he witnesses a crime or switches careers to the car industry. Because that’s what he’s good at. Cars. To be specific, he’s good at recognizing cars. He can see a glimpse of a dashboard or the seats and almost always guess the make, model and year within 2 tries. It was a fun party trick, but that’s all Richie thought of it.
Eddie, however, thinks it’s incredibly sexy. He is interested in cars- has always enjoyed the look and sound of them. Watching the fancy cars be transported by train through Derry had turned into attending car shows when he was stressed. He’s pretty alright when it comes to telling what someone’s driving, but his skills are more at driving itself. Seeing Richie identify what car he’s driving for work that week based on a selfie with only the headrest and half the door in frame is frankly…hot. There’s no other way he can describe it.
1.
The first time it happens is his first day back to work after the leave he was granted for his injury. The Losers group chat has been very active since their reunion ended; everyone sent daily updates at first to make sure they weren’t going to forget again, which would be awkward considering they had just broken off into three pairs. Ben and Beverly had gone on a sailboat vacation while she figured out how to transfer properties without Tom’s signature since he was dead in the sewers. After he and Audra had finally admitted they weren’t right for each other and agreed to separate, Bill had joined Mike on his journey of exploration now that he was finally able to leave Derry.
Richie had stayed with him while he recovered from being impaled, started divorce proceedings, and requested a job transfer to California. Eddie had moved in with Richie after the transfer was approved and he’d healed enough to be discharged. He’d gone through all the humiliating and sacred stages of realizing he was in love with his best friend. There’d been more moments with Richie in those vulnerable months that reminded Eddie of what he’d hoped marriage would be like when he’d recited his vows than his years with Myra.
Richie had stressed over him starting work, but they were anxieties reassured after a conversation instead of weapons of guilt held against him in an emotional fight. He actually felt shy and flattered at the attention, not suffocated and scrutinized. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt that. So, when he gets inside his assigned car, he snaps a quick selfie and sends it in the group chat before leaving for his client with do not disturb on.
He doesn’t get a chance to check his notifications again until lunch. Beverly and Mike send him well wishes on his “first day”, but it’s (of course) Richie’s response that takes his attention. Not just his either, since Eddie can see others had responded to Richie and not his picture, but he doesn’t read what they said yet because Richie had somehow guessed the exact car he was in.
2012 Lexus ES350
He knows Richie isn’t into cars. He’d heard plenty of barbs about being a car guy to know it wasn’t a topic Richie found interesting enough to pay attention to in any depth past surface level.
The others, he sees, respond in jest, asking if Richie was preparing for an advanced version of celebrity jeopardy or if he had a special relationship with that car model.
Eddie is glad this is happening over text, however, because he can’t even pretend to laugh along. His stomach isn’t even warm, it’s scorching the way his skin did when they’d jump into cold pools and then the jacuzzi right after as kids. He has to manually breathe in…and out…as he types out a simple, “How the fuck did you know that” and sends it before quickly putting his phone away. He sighs, running a hand over his face to hide and indulge in the heat radiating from his flushed face.
Well, okay then. Weird thing to be attracted to, but no one has to know! He was caught off guard and didn’t know this was apparently a thing for him. And who would’ve thought Richie could do that! He wasn’t prepared! If this comes up again, which it probably won’t, then he can join in on the jokes. Nobody has to know. This is fine, and Eddie is relaxed.
He lets out a strained laugh, shaking his head at himself. Back to work.
2.
Beverly sends a screenshot in the group chat two weeks later while Eddie is finishing some errands. It’s a twitter interaction with her text after asking, “So this is just a side gig you do, Tozier?”
Eddie clicks on the image. It’s a stylish woman’s selfie, the caption sounding like song lyrics. Richie’s verified account is underneath commenting another specific make and model: “2010 subaru legacy 2.5GT?”
Eddie had not been prepared this time, either. He gasps when he realizes what he’s seeing before almost desperately zooming in to the selfie in an effort to find any indication of what could be giving that away. There’s nothing he can find except a growing sense of bafflement and arousal within himself.
He’s getting into his car when Richie responds.
They’re like hot moms, man
They just come to me
It’s such a Richie thing to say, and Eddie grabs on to his steering wheel to wordlessly yell out the surge of emotions that fill him.
Stupid fucking comedian who’s too smart for his own sake. Or Eddie’s sake, for that matter, considering he was the one losing his mind in a CVS parking lot over this. He just- he doesn’t get it, it’s so fucking impressive and Richie does it effortlessly! It’s infuriating and so, so hot. And Richie probably has no idea. Even more exasperating.
He makes up more errands to run in order to delay going home to his problem comedian. He’ll be more prepared next time.
3.
It’s only a couple days later that Stan sends the next picture, and this time he asks Richie to guess. It’s a picture out the passenger window with only the side mirror, window frame, and a slice of the dash visible as the main focus is clearly the sunset happening. He asks Richie, “Can you guess this one or do you only work with selfies?” like it’s a challenge because it’s a sure-fire way to get him to actually answer.
Eddie is at the house when he receives the text. In the house while Richie is also in the house. They’re not in the same room, and Eddie thanks whatever space animal is out there for that. He’s in the living room and assumes Richie is in his office; the idea of him coming out and talking to Eddie in that moment stresses him out enough to start sweating, so he quickly gathers his things and moves into his room after turning off the TV.
He studies the picture to try and figure out the answer before Richie can, but he knows it’s useless. The chat pulls him back to the bottom when Richie replies.
2000 chevy silverado 🍴
How’s that for a show pony?
Eddie drops his phone on the bed and his head into his hands. He counts to ten in his head, back to zero, and starts again before his phone vibrates with another message.
…extended cab…?
He waits in anticipation for Stan to confirm or deny like a gambler watching the horses race. The worst part is that he knows Richie is going to be right and that’s exactly why his heart is beating so violently.
It feels as if an hour passes when Eddie knows it’s only been 2 minutes before Stan replies.
Wow.
Is this what those moms mean when they say ADHD is a super power?
He shoves his face into the pillow.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10
1, 2, 3-
4.
Eddie is watching D.E.B.S in the living room on account of Beverly recommending it. There are four characters in a car when Richie leaves the kitchen with his snack bowl filled.
He glances at the screen and casually says, “1959 Cadillac Coupe Deville,” with a point before continuing on his way.
Eddie breathes through the urge to follow behind him and jump Richie’s bones. He is completely normal about what just happened.
This new discovery is totally not a threat to his plan to confess to the best friend he forgot for half of his life, who recently came out, and he now lives with like a normal person.
He still knows exactly what is going on in this movie, his rewinding has nothing to do with what just happened- which was nothing.
It was all fine.
5.
A couple months later, Mike and Bill crash at Richie’s place the first night they’re in town on their vacational tour since he has the space. They all order pizza and have a drink.
Eddie suspects the two of them have something going on between them whether it’s acknowledged yet or not, and that Mike suspects the same thing between him and Richie. Neither of them talk about it. It’s some of the most fun they’ve had in a while.
The next morning Mike asks if they want to join them for the day and lead the itinerary with their favorite spots. Richie has been busy writing lately, so he jumps at the opportunity.
They get pancakes, eggs, and bacon at a diner first. Richie orders the sweetest pancakes he can on the menu- triple chocolate (chip) with whipped cream and he douses in strawberry syrup- and slides his eggs onto Eddie’s plate because he only wants the bacon but knows he’ll get shit from the other if he doesn’t order both. He tries to steal a piece of bacon off Eddie’s plate, but his hand is quickly smacked away. He can’t get away with discarding his eggs and stealing.
Mike gets chocolate chip pancakes with whipped cream. Bill gets butter pecan. When it’s served, they automatically split their stacks in half, Bill placing his on the smaller side plate and sliding it to Mike while Mike places his half onto Bill’s now-empty side of the plate. Eddie smiles at them.
“You guys get a lot of pancakes on the road?”
Mike chuckles and nods; Bill blushes and shrugs. They start discussing if the beach is going to be a part of their day and move on.
It’s a couple hours later when Eddie asks about the mileage on their rental that it happens again.
“Oh! Speaking of rentals, Richie, I’ve got some pictures for you,” Bill says as he pulls his phone out.
At first Eddie is a little offended at the photos apparently only being for Richie, but as he sees the first one over Bill’s shoulder, he can feel his body temperature rising. Pictures. Eddie is going to have to sit here in this confined space next to Richie while he does the thing that’s really fucking attractive. Great. Great. This is a nightmare.
He pushes himself into the seat as if he could escape the situation entirely. Richie groans in annoyance but leans forward to see the screen.
“You guys took these to quiz me? Jeesh, I’ve never had anyone put so much time into flirting with me before. That’s a 2012 Patriot Jeep.”
Eddie closes his eyes.
“Mmm, Mitsubishi Mirage?”
Bill gives an affirmative hum.
“2014, ES?”
“How do you do that?” Bill’s voice is full of amusement.
Eddie opens his eyes to see Richie shrug. He slides to the next one. “2012 Toyota Corolla S.”
“Uh, I think so. Let’s see if the S is right.”
They slide to the car information Bill had taken a picture of to confirm it is a Toyota Corolla S.
“Okay, what the fuck? Where do you even hear these from? You’re not into cars,” Eddie blurts out. He can tell it comes out angry, but he can’t bring himself to care.
The three of them raise their eyebrows in silence. Richie slides the phone into Bill’s hand. He turns to stare into Eddie’s eyes. Eddie swallows, but doesn’t say anything else. Bill slowly turns the music up.
Richie does this thing when Eddie has an outburst out of nowhere or or the joke keeps being pushed farther and farther, where he intently looks between both of Eddie’s eyes as if he needs to focus on each one to read whatever he’s not being told. It always makes Eddie’s chest feel tight. He wonders how well he’s read. It seems like Richie can read him like the back of his hand sometimes, but right now he’s not sure he wants his feelings to be known.
“I was picked up by a couple to their third when I was in college. The guy was super into cars, the girl was super into having sex in those cars, and I was super into them. I probably just retained the stuff they talked about all the time,” Richie says.
Bill turns the music down again just slightly.
Eddie opens his mouth, but has no idea what to say. After a few seconds of silently scrambling, he just says, “What?”
“Yeah. Brandon and Marisol. We met at a local rock show and they asked me on a date. I was with them for like 4 months and I swear they only ever talked about what cars they wanted to buy or what they would never buy if they didn’t have to. I was usually too high to pay attention, but I guess my brain picked some stuff up.”
Eddie blinks at him and then slumps back into the seat.
“Huh.” he slowly nods. “That adds up in a lot of ways.”
The three of them nod in agreement.
+1
Eddie is at his work Christmas party and he is drunk off sangria. He hadn’t meant to get drunk, it had just snuck up on him. One minute he was meeting people for the first time, and the next he was wishing desperately that Richie was here.
They had been dating for three months now, which feels weird to say again as a 40 year old. It was absolutely surreal. Eddie couldn’t believe he was allowed to kiss Richie in their house.
Eddie couldn’t believe Richie wasn’t here right now.
He makes his way out the venue and pulls out his phone while walking to the corner of the building. There’s a man in a black apron taking a smoke break at the other corner. The phone only rings twice before being answered.
“Hey, Eds, how’s the socializing going?”
Eddie looks over to the man smoking, then closes his eyes to feel the breeze. It was weird not having snow in December.
“Do you remember when you used to smoke?”
“What? Of course,” Richie chuckles at him.
“When I was stressed in college, I used to buy cigarettes and light them like incense. Never smoked them, I just wanted to- I liked the smell. It reminded me of you, I think. I used to feel so guilty about craving smokes, but I was just missing you. And I had no idea,” he sighs.
There’s a pause on the other end. “That’s really fucking sweet,” Richie says thickly. “What made you think of that?”
Eddie shrugs as if Richie can see him. “I miss you. I want you to come pick me up.”
“Yeah? You done for the night?”
“Here, yeah. I could recharge with you, I guess.”
He gets another chuckle. “I’ll be right there, baby. Go back inside and say goodbye to at least one person.”
“Don’t call me that, dick. Text me when you get here. And hurry up.”
Eddie goes inside to say goodbye to two people, thank you very much, before hovering in the lobby. Richie lets him know when he arrives, and he gladly goes back outside to be greeted by the comedian holding his passenger door open for him. He sees a billboard while they’re driving that makes him gasp.
“What car is that, Rich?” he excitedly points.
It’s some slogan over a sunrise that’s seen out the car window. Similar to the picture Stan sent, you can’t see much more than a portion of the dash and side mirror.
It’s been weeks since anyone had brought up Richie’s skill. Eddie assumed the glamour had worn off for the others and Richie didn’t seem to care about showing it off in the first place, but it had definitely still been in the back of Eddie’s mind. The alcohol makes it easy to be the one to ask.
Richie’s eyes dart over to him, and then back and forth between the road an billboard.
“I thought you didn’t like when I did that.”
Eddie turns to him, face twisting with confusion.
“Idiot. Why would you think that?”
Richie chuckles. He looks towards Eddie again.
“When Bill and Mike-”
“When Bill and Mike were here, I was losing my mind. Are you not gonna answer?”
They had passed the sign by now, but Eddie didn’t have any interest in turning away from Richie now that he was staring. The sharp lines of his nose and jaw, the softness of his lips. He’d filled out more since he and Eddie eat more regularly than they drink, and all Eddie ever wants to do is put his hands on those broad shoulders and big arms. The smile on his face is illuminated by the lights of the city. He looks beautiful and Eddie can’t believe he’s finally his. If he hadn’t been drinking, he’d believe the buzzing under his skin was from happiness alone.
“It was the new Buick Enclave. Could tell by the weird air vent,” Richie answers.
Eddie sighs, melting into the seat. “Why is that so hot?” he mumbles.
“What was that?”
“I said that was hot, asshole. Been driving me crazy for months,” Eddie snaps at him.
Richie bursts out laughing and turns to look at him momentarily.
“Are you serious?” he asks incredulously as realization dawns on him. “Is that why-”
“Yes.”
They’re both blushing now, which Eddie enjoys. He probably would’ve jumped out of the car if Richie had judged him. Instead, he slaps away the hand that pinches his cheek while Richie exclaims, “cute, cute, cute!”
Richie’s hand grabs at his own and laces their fingers together. “I’m glad you have a crush on me too, Eds. I get all hot and bothered when you cut up your pills, so I know how you feel.”
“You- that’s not- you know what, yeah, sure. We’re the same,” Eddie says.
“Yeah,” Richie sighs. He brings their locked hands up to his mouth and kisses the back of Eddie’s. “Two gay losers.”