Work Text:
It had been a week since Alfred F. Jones had just started his new position as Vargas Law’s youngest attorney (ahem, the youngest attorney that was not related to the Vargas family. For legal reasons there is no nepotism at Vargas Law). And Ludwig had to say, Alfred was pretty on top of it.
Ludwig gave Alfred a file on the first case he would be working on. Feliciano was hanging around the office and, judging by the way the Italian was whistling, he was anxious to get out of here.
“Thank you, Alfred. See you on Monday.”
Alfred took the file and whistled, “Awesome sauce.”
Ludwig’s eye twitched at the informality. Well, that was one thing they could work on. He was so distracted that he almost missed the next thing Alfred said.
“Just in time to pick up my boyfriend from school. Enjoy ya’ll’s weekend!”
And Alfred was gone. Again with the informality! What even is “ya’ll’s”?
Ludwig sighed and went to pack up his briefcase. “Give me a second, Feliciano.” He began to sort through his files for a minute or two in silence. Which was nice, but very out of character for Feliciano. He’d expected the man to start talking the moment Ludwig asked for a second.
He turned to study Feliciano, who was no longer whistling and instead looking at the door quizzically.
“Is there something wrong?”
“Nothing…” Feliciano started. “It’s just that, Alfred said he was going to pick up his boyfriend from school. Isn’t he, like, twenty five?”
Ludwig took time to mull it over. “Yes, he is. Maybe his partner is still in college, that wouldn’t be too odd.”
Feliciano brightened, “Yeah, you’re probably right! Now, let’s get out of here, Luddy—I want to get tiramisu!”
“We have to eat dinner first.”
“Is that not so different from what I said?”
-
The both of them had forgotten all about it until Roma Vargas’ famous Halloween party. Ludwig has never been the type to drink with your boss, but when your boss is your husband’s father and you’ve known them for most of your life, to the point that your marriage might have been an arranged marriage (probably not), Ludwig felt free to let loose a bit. With letting loose referring to one beer the whole night.
“And what the fuck are you supposed to be?” Someone said behind him.
“Lovino. It’s nice to see you.” It really wasn’t, but again, when your boss is your husband’s father and therefore you also have to work with your husband’s brother (who was the actual youngest lawyer of the company), you make do.
Lovino was wearing an old grandmother's dressing gown. He also, strangely, was wearing sun glasses and had a (hopefully) life-sized toy rifle slung across his shoulders. Ludwig knew better than to ask about it.
“I’m a Roman soldier.”
“Pfft, I bet it’s from your secret perv closet. You look like a beefed up hotdog dominatrix that doesn’t want to be here—did my brother make you wear this?” Lovino gasped, yup he was drunk. “No… did he dominate you into wearing that BDSM shit?"
Before Ludwig could respond, Lovino rambled on, “You know what, never the fuck mind, I actually don’t want to know what you two bastards do-"
Alfred jumped into their conversation, his black cape fluttering behind him. Ludwig’s hero, even. “What’s up guys! Sorry I was late, it’s midterm season and I was helping my boyfriend out with that. It sucks they couldn’t come tonight, but they’re pulling an all-nighter to study.”
Lovino took another sip of his drink, said, “I’m out,” and left.
Ludwig then, thankfully or not, had to face Alfred on his own. He decided that he was to be an adult about it. No point in beating around the bush. “Midterms? Is your partner finishing up their undergrad?”
“What are you talking about? Of course not!”
So much for being straightforward.
Behind them, Gilbert yelled, “Luddy! The two interns are doing a drinking contest, you’ve gotta see this!”
Alfred went to watch the interns drink themselves to embarrassment, but Roma did favor party goers. Ludwig finished his beer. Maybe he would break his rule and drink two of them.
-
It was nearing the Thanksgiving holidays, meaning that it was Gilbert’s duty to bother Ludwig in his office and figure out what the Beilschmidt-Vargas families were doing. Or so Gilbert said every year.
“Luddy!”
“Brother, I told you to call before you barge into my office. I have a meeting in five.”
“You knew I was going to come.”
“…Well, what were you thinking?”
“My awesome idea for Thanksgiving is to make sauerbraten."
Ludwig opened up his planner and jotted that down. “I know that the Vargases will be getting a turkey, so it might be nice to have other meats. Feliciano is making Trenette al Pesto. Lovino is bringing arancini and cannoli.”
“Fuck. Yeah. The guy’s a pain in the ass, but he sure knows how to make cannoli.”
Alfred knocked on the open door. “Hey, boss! Talking about Thanksgiving plans?”
Ludwig nodded and waved him in. “Come in, Alfred. My brother was just about to leave.”
“Hey! I protest that!”
“No biggie. I just finished reading over the last case file you sent me and made some notes for you to read over. Now, for fun stuff, I’m making green bean casserole!"
“Sounds…appetizing?”
“It sure is! My boyfriend isn’t allowed in the kitchen, so he’s bringing the store cranberry sauce. We’re going to get it tonight, if I’ll be able to unglue him from Stardrew Valley.”
“You mean the video game?” Gilbert jumped in. “Our little niece loves that game! She can’t stop talking about Sebastian being her husband or whatever.”
Ludwig nodded. Then, nodded again, much slower. Lili was 14.
“Tell me about it. Arthur wants to replace me with him.”
Ludwig coughed. “Let’s just focus on our case meeting, see you later brother.”
When Ludwig looked up what Stardew Valley was, it was a farming simulator. It seemed like it was juvenile, but Ludwig admitted that it did look fun. It also did not answer anything.
-
Ludwig was never one to gossip around, but yet, here he was, huddling by the water cooler and whispering to Feliciano. “Feli, I’m not quite sure about Alfred. I asked if his partner was finishing university and he said ‘of course not!’"
“Oh, wow. Lovino wasn’t lying then."
“You knew?” Ludwig hissed.
Felicinao raised his hands in surrender, “Well, he mentioned that Alfred was helping his boyfriend study. Which didn’t seem that different from the idea that he might be in university, just like you said a few months ago! And besides, Lovino was super drunk on Halloween.”
Ludwig continued on, “When I talked to him last week, his ‘boyfriend’ is obsessed with the same game Lili plays. Lili."
The door to the breakroom opened wide, and both of them jumped away from each other. Ludwig was never jumpy. Not even when Lovino tried killing him when he proposed to Feliciano (AKA, Lovino threw a plastic fork at him after the proposal as a ‘threat’ what the Vargas family would do if they ever got divorced. Or worse, annulled.)
“—I’m telling you dude, I don’t care that you’re 16! I want the baseball ball—“
Feliciano stared at Ludwig like a deer in the headlights.
“—and while you’re at it, I want my mii to have a new room—“
Alfred nodded at them and left the break room with a fresh cup of coffee.
“I don’t think that clears up much."
“No,” Feliciano agreed.
-
“Excited for the Christmas party?” Feliciano asked Alfred as they walked to their cars. “Also, are you bringing Arthur? You keep talking about him, and I really hope to meet him one day! When Lovino brought Antonio to our Christmas Party that was a crazy day…but, again, Antonio’s been coming to our Christmas Party since we were babies. I mean, like, after they got together. Which was when we were in high school… Again, fourteen year olds are very hormonal! It was still crazy!”
Ludwig nodded, already catching on to Feliciano’s plan. He stopped by their car without opening it.
Alfred unlocked his car though, “Oh, yeah. Super excited. Arthur’s definitely coming since his semester will be over! He really does deserve a break. What happened when they were fourteen?”
Without missing a beat, Feliciano continued, “Nothing much, Antonio just threw up some food in the pool. It was winter, so not like much was lost. Arthur’s semester? How was it?”
“It was fine, he’s in the middle of turning in his finals! I’m sure you guys can talk all about it then, anyway, gotta go. He’s at the high school right now. Bye!”
Alfred turned on his Ford truck and left them in the parking lot.
“I guess we’ll see for sure this Saturday?” Ludwig reasoned.
-
Once they arrived at the party venue (a fancy Spanish restaurant that Antonio’s family owned), Feliciano made a beeline towards Alfred. He was wearing slacks and a fancy overcoat in navy.
“Soo…Alfred, where’s your boyfriend?” Feliciano asked without pretense.
“Oh, he’s in the bathroom.” Alfred said. “Do you want some wine? It’s really good here.”
“I know it’s good here,” Feliciano snapped.
Ludwig gulped.
The three of them were silent for a while. They could hear the subtle sound of a toilet flushing. Hands being washed.
The hand dryer.
Alfred stood there with his face scrunched up as if dying from the awkward tension. “Makes sense. I guess the Vargas and the Carriedos have been tight.”
“Alfred, do you know anything about this town?” Someone said behind them. This must be the boyfriend.
Ludwig and Feliciano ignored Alfred. They both were focused on the blond man appearing before them. He was shorter than Alfred, yes, but his face seemed to scream ‘adult.’ His face was scrunched up, making the wrinkles and eyebags much more prominent. He also had quite thick hair (and eyebrow hair) that Ludwig could be jealous of. He was definitely an adult, wearing a stuffy old suit that even Lovino would say was out of fashion. It was a traditional black suit with a green lining and waist coat. He was even wearing a cravat.
“Pleasure to meet you, Arthur! How old are you?”
Wow. Feliciano was really impatient. Ludwig didn’t stop him though. He’s been dying to know the answer for months.
Arthur looked flatly at Alfred, “Al, what have you told them? Are you spreading rumors that I’m an old hag again?”
“What, no! I never once mentioned your age!”
Yup. That was the problem.
“We’ll talk about this later,” Arthur grumbled, but turned to face Feliciano and Ludwig, who were crowding him and the bathroom.
Someone coughed behind them, “Excuse me, can I make my way to the restroom?”
They moved, now only crowding Arthur. They looked at him expectantly.
“If you must know, I’m twenty seven.”
“Why were you at the high school this week?” Ludwig asked before he could stop himself. He guessed that maybe Arthur didn’t finish high school, but he seemed like a smart man. Perhaps Ludwig was out of touch with how schools worked these days.
Arthur scoffed, “What? I went for an interview, I’ll be working there over the summer.”
“But you’re also in school?” Feliciano asked.
Arthur nodded slowly, as if the two of them were slow–which was somewhat common for Feliciano, but never Ludwig. Never him. It was weird to be on the other side of things.
“Yes. I’m a grad student. I’m finishing up my doctoral studies in English and Education. I’ll be student-teaching at the high school this summer.”
“Oh.” Feliciano said.
“Oh.” Ludwig said.
Alfred bit his lip, looking at the three of them. He must think his boss was just awful now. Alfred began to lead him and his adult boyfriend away. Feliciano and Ludwig watched them go, knowing that they might have deserved that.
-
(“For God’s sake, what the fuck did you tell them?”
“Nothing! I swear, I mentioned a few times that you were studying and stuff! But that’s true, that’s like your work!”
“Oh my god.”
“...I might have also told them you like Stardew Valley? I did mention also the levels in Tomodachi life..."
“Ah, bollocks.”)