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PREQUEL
The first time Zuko sees the writing on his arms he immediately gets scared. His father is strict, and if he saw that his skin was a mess of words he might take it out on Zuko, but at the same time he was excited. He saw how mom had writing on her arms that she kept hidden. She told him about how she had a soul bonded, and he knew from father's clean arms that he wasn't her bonded.
Then more words appeared underneath in a different handwriting, then another. Zuko considered if he should respond. He decided that the bonded should know he exists, but that he wouldn't communicate often.
"Hello, if there is anyone there it is a pleasure to talk to you. My name is Yue, princess of the Northern water tribe." was written in neat, almost formal water tribe script, on his right wrist.
Below that, in much messier water tribe script was, "Oh! Hi Yue, I'm Sokka! Soon to be the greatest warrior of the Southern tribe and son of the chief!"
On his left arm was written, in script that looked both Earth Kingdom and water tribe adjacent was,
"Well this is awkward
I'm Suki and I'm an orphan"
Suki that's okay, you don't have to be a child of anyone important, Tui and La blessed our bonding, so no matter what happens the spirits think you're important regardless of origin.
Below that Zuko saw a check, that he assumed this Sokka, made in response of Yue's claim. Zuko made sure he was alone before he grabbed a quill to respond. He wrote on his leg, so it could be easily hidden, in both water tribe and earth kingdom script, so that whomever these strangers were could see.
I'm sorry. I wish things were different, but I'm not allowed to be bonded. Maybe in the next life.
He thought that was going to have to be enough, then he used his sleeves to cover his arms as he went to his mom's room to learn how she bandaged away the messages.
- - - - - - - - - -
ONE
The first time Sokka feels a soul pain he was 10, it hurts so badly that it feels like someone put a knife through his chest from the inside. His mom and dad were in front of him; when they were previously explaining how dad was now going to start introducing him to the hunts, and how he needed to stay safe when it happeneds. Sokka immediately collapsed on the floor without warning, breathing heavily; while, he was reduced to sitting on his hands and knees.
His mother immediately realized what was happening, after once experiencing the same thing after Bato lost his parents or when dad go hit by a tiger seal during a hunt, and rushed over to her son. She explained to him how after an very powerful negative emotion, such as grief, anger or even things like fear; or a life threatening injury that he would feel these soul pains, as a way to help him be able to be closer to his bonded, and as a way to help him find and protect them in times of need.
After hearing this, and recovering from the now fading pain that only seemed to last a sec, but felt like hours, he asked for some graphite. He felt immediately protective over his bonded. He didn't wanna lose Suki or Yue, like he had apparently lost his third soulmate, because of.. well Sokka didn't know. He wanted to help them, but after that first message he received at 6 none of them ever got another message from this mysterious third.
"Are you two okay!? What happened?", he hastily wrote out.
Suki and Yue immediately responded that they were okay, but they had felt some strange sense of pain that faded almost as soon as it happened, but none of them knew why. They suspected it had something to do with their other soulmate, but the never got a response to confirm it.
- - - - - - - - - -
TWO
Yue was crouched on the ground of the spirit oasis, as she prayed to Tui and La for their blessings, as the spirits were the those of Ocean and Moon, but they were also known of the spirits of bonded pairs. Then as she was in deep meditation, she felt an intense, almost blinding pain over her left eye and ear, and over across her face like a burning hand pressing closer. She let out a choked sob as Master Yagoda and Master Pakku rushed to her side.
She instinctively knew it was another spirit pain, like the one she felt the first time at 11, and the one she felt another not even a year later when Sokka almost lost his mom, but this was so much worse. It felt like a piece of her, a piece of herself that she didn't even know, was dying. It was like a suffocating pain that couldn't leave her even when the physical pain faded into nothing, like it never even happened, and really it didn't, at least not to her. Yet, it felt like she was right there, that burning pain didn't even feel like an accident, it felt like someone deliberately went to try and permanently end a part of who she was.
She couldn't breathe for what felt like hours, she just sat there inhaling minor lung full gasps of air before it fell out as another wave of sobs broken through her carefully controlled demeanor. She felt the familiar buzzing on her skin that meant one of her bonded was sending a message, it was probably Sokka, always first to rush to others before even acknowledging his own pain.
".. Master Pakku," she gasped out. "I need a quill, I think one of my bonded is dying." She distantly heard Master Yagoda gasp out her concern, healing away any internal injuries that may have occurred due to the spirit pains.
Master Pakku returned as fast as he could, and she immediately rushed to start writing, when she paused. She saw that both Sokka and Suki had already written something down already. The words on her inner thigh felt more like a brand then they did before.
- - - - - - - - - -
THREE
Suki felt like she was freezing, it wasn't like a normal freezing, if she had to guess it was what she would assume how hypothermia felt like, but that wouldn't make sense. Kyoshi Island was a warm almost spring like year round, and it hardly even snowed in the colder months.
Then a chill went down her spine, both Yue and Sokka were down in the Northern Water Tribe, and said that a Fire Navy ship was heading their way, but that they would respond as soon as possible. She grabbed one of the pens that one of her girls gifted her to write to them.
"Are you two okay, what happened at the battle?"
She knew that they probably wouldn't respond for hours, but thay didn't stop her from pacing back and forth in her room, she was really regretting not going with Sokka when he came and visited Kyoshi. She went to grab a scroll so she could immediately start thinking about plans, so she could see how she and her girls could protect the village and help them on their way through the Earth Kingdom. She didn't wanna feel like this again. Know that the people she loved were in danger, but completely helpless to do anything.
Hours later like she had expected the would Sokka replied, "Yeah, we're okay! We had a closecall with General Muttonchops but the jerk prince of the jerkbending nation started attacking him as a way to 'repay the whole not letting him freeze to death thing'. I was gonna keep him there but of course Aang ever the savior complex had to rescue the guy who's tried to kill us multiple times. Though I supposed it was the right call this time otherwise Yue would be dead. Aang tried to recruit him but he refused and just left us alone for some reason, bet he's gonna come back to attack us another day but I am grateful he save Yue's life so I can't be too mad about it"
Suki laughed, both of her wrists were covered in Sokka's messy script as he rattled on and on about this as he always did, it was such a relief that they were okay that she could just cry, she thought it was odd that she felt like she was freezing, but she assumed the soul pains were from fear then, rather then any actual physical pain.
- - - - - - - - - -
FOUR
Sokka and Yue were both worried about Suki, she'd been captured by Azula and her two friends, but she was fine and sending daily updates when she could, and it wasn't like they could do anything while they were looking for Appa. Then after they found Appa, Aang received and important message from a Guru to help him enter the Avatar State freely, Toph received a message from her mom, and Katara and Sokka figured out where their dad's fleet was. Yue decided to go with Sokka, while Katara stayed back in Ba Sing Se, to meet Chief Hakoda and one of his bonded and his second in command Bato.
She thought she was getting along with them swimmingly when she felt a wave of intense, nauseous dizziness, and she could see that Sokka felt it too from where he sat next to her. He managed to keep his footing though, unlike her, but when she got up she wrapped them in a soothing bit of water around their heads to heal some of the residual effects like Master Yagoda taught her. They both sighed in relief as the nausea faded, then looked at each other. They had to return to Ba Sing Se as fast as possible so they could ride on Appa and save Suki from whatever dreadful thing was happening to her.
Both Chief Hakoda and Bato understood, knowing they would both do the same if either of them or Kya was in danger, and brought their ship as close as they could to shore, before Sokka and Yue rushed back as fast as they could. Aang found them when they were about halfway there, Yue unfortunately made Sokka have to go slower due to her inexperience with travel. Apparently Aang felt brief pains letting him know Katara was in danger, making Sokka's restlessness go even higher. Yue, of course, gripped his hand as hard as she could to ground him until they landed, Toph was already waiting for them at the house they stayed at, but so was a familiar face.
Sokka reached for his boomerang, and Aang looked more confused then anything. General Iroh was sitting at the front steps of the house with Toph sharing a cup of tea, they seemed to be having a pleasant conversation, so Yue ever the responsible and most reasonable of the group carefully walked up despite Sokka's protests. She felt like the general wouldn't approach them without reason, and Toph is usually has a good sense of character, so if she decided to trust the general, then Yue would try to as well.
Toph, of course, was the first to look over to her approach, Yue bowed politely to the general, "General Iroh, may I ask why you are here? And if I may so inquire what it has to do with us?"
"Please, call me Uncle Iroh," he said easily.
Yue hesitated, it felt improper to not refer to him by proper terminology, but she digressed, "alright, Uncle Iroh. Could you please answer my questions?"
His eyes seemed to darken then, ".. my nephew has been kidnapped by his sister. I know he has done horrible things to you all, but I beg of you to save him.. he's all I have left. He has good inside him and is trying to change, please do not make your past feud dictate his future."
"Good inside him?! Why don't you come back when it's outside him to!"
Yue placed a hand on Sokka's shoulder as a warning, "Sokka." He seemed to understand and backed down a bit.
Then Aang responded, ".. I don't know if we should help him after everything he's done.." Uncle Iroh visibly deflated at that, "but.. we can't just leave him there if he really is a traitor to the Fire Nation either." She felt Sokka try to respond under her hand and squeezed his shoulder again, as Aang continued, ".. okay. We'll help you if you help us find Katara. Azula probably has her locked away somewhere around here too."
"Azula is a creature of habit. If I know my niece in any degree is that she would keep her prisoners somewhere close, but hard to access for anyone but her and her resources."
Toph decided then to stand up, "I felt some of those Dai Li move deeper underground where I felt an entire abandoned cave system in. I didn't feel any of them going down there while we were here, so if I had to guess that's where she's keeping them."
The rest of them nodded, that would make sense, and explain how she was able to get into Ba Sing Se if she had the Dai Li under her control. They decided to split up, Toph and Sokka would go after Azula to stop whatever she was planning; while Uncle Iroh, Aang, and her would go explore the underground tunnels to find Zuko and Katara. Sokka was resistant to this plan, after she almost died at the Siege of the North, and after Suki's recent capture, but relented after she explained how if they were hurt or unconscious that she was the only one with them that could heal them at the moment.
The tunnel got deeper until finally it opened up into a cavern of crystal, Katara and Zuko were close together, Katara seemed to be using diluted pink-ish water to heal a likely major gash on Zuko’s head. He seemed barley aware of what was happening and his clothes were burned, cut, and muddy around him. The only other thing that seemed to be covering him was high grade black bandages that she desperately wanted to ask about, but knew better of it.
Aang of course immediately rushed to Katara's side, checking that his bonded was alright, and once he was sure she was he looked over at the extremely dazed, almost dissociative Zuko. Uncle Iroh already took hold of his hand, while Yue moved to help Katara heal him; and, with her help they were both able to repair whatever external and internal physical injuries there were. Something in her chest seemed to lighten, but she ignored it to focus more on healing whatever else she could.
Zuko slowly came back to himself, blinking up at the two of them, then Aang, and admittedly less so at Uncle Iroh, but he still received a blink or two. He looked like he was gonna say something, but then the wall facing him fell down, revealing Azula with some Dai Li respectfully behind her.
He immediately shot up into a defensive form, like he had never been dazed or bleeding out moments before. The fight lasted for what felt like hour, or even days, Yue couldn't tell anymore. She wasn't trained to fight, but she did her best where she could. They moved down to the next chamber over, which was much larger then the last. She attempted to freeze the Dai Li attacking with varying success, and healed any minor injuries she could from a distance. She hated how she couldn't do more, after this she was gonna beg one of them for bending, or even nonbending techniques, so she wouldn't feel this useless again.
She sighed in relief when Toph appeared with Sokka behind her, when she realized that Zuko had froze in his confrontation with Azula. "Oh, come on Zuzu. We know this isn't you, you aren't a traitor now, are you? Help me destroy the Avatar, and father will have to welcome you home!" Zuko seemed to hesitate, and Yue immediately saw how Sokka's eyes looked like death as he aimed his boomerang at Zuko. Yue rushed to him to stop Sokka from choosing whatever ridiculous plan this was, before they even heard whatever Zuko's answer was, but it was too late. Sokka already released his boomerang, Zuko noticed it just before it hit him, and remembered to dodged it on the way back. Unlike what Sokka had previously told them had happened in his encounter with the Southern Water Tribe.
A faint burst of pain hit her, but she couldn't focus on it when Zuko, face contorted in what she could only see as hurt aimed his flames at Sokka, and took his sister's side. His side now being forced on him with that first attack.
- - - - - - - - - -
FIVE
Suki yelled at him for days through their bond through the months they couldn't break her out of the Boiling Rock, about his idiocy for attacking Prince Zuko when it sounded like he was going to change sides. Yue only stared at him with disapproving looks for a few weeks. In Sokka's defense, he thought that the jerkbender was working with the scary firebending girl. Yeah, she attacked him and put him underground with his sister, but that could have all been a trick to make it easier to ambush them!
All Sokka could see when he moved underground was that Zuko was standing there as what's her face was talking to him with a smile of a well thought plan falling into place, one he knew all too well, and Zuko wasn't doing anything against her. So, he immediately thought that Zuko was already in against Aang and them; endangering one of his bonded, his sister, and her bonded, and the Earth bending master that was slowly becoming one of his best friends.
Now, they're hiding from the Fire Nation even more so then normal because the whole world thinks Aang is dead, and he had died briefly in the moments before Yue and Katara brought him back from the edge. Now until the eclipse, they would have to stay hidden, then they would try to launch a surprise attack against the Fire Nation with what little forces they have after Ba Sing Se got taken over.
To be fair that hadn't been the greatest of his decisions, and they only seemed to be getting worse. He couldn't even explain his own plan to the group, he gathered together, for this invasion. Then the Fire Lord isn't anywhere in his palace. His dad gets hurt, and Yue has to decide to stay behind to heal him. Toph, him, and Aang had to go through these underground tunnels to look for the invasive Fire Lord, only to run into Miss-creepy firey princess. Then, to top it all off, he fell for her jabs about Suki wasting all of their limited time of the eclipse, making their entire invasion plan fail. The plan he came up with. Not to mention the weird jolt of lightning that seemed to make his heart stutter for a moment.
Now, his father and the rest of the older people he'd gathered had to be left behind, and it was all his fault. The rest of them were forced to hide at the Western Air Temple, nothing but months between them and the comet now, because he couldn't keep it together. Suki and Yue tried to comfort him after the fact, but he knew they were still sorta upset with his whole Zuko fail.
After a day at the temple they were gathered around Appa, for Toph to point out someone behind him. Only to hear, "hi, Zuko here." Looking into Zuko's eyes it looked like he went through hell. It was almost like he could feel every burn and cut and emotion he was feeling by just looking at him, but he knew that was ridiculous, but he also somehow knew that everything Zuko was saying was true. He looked at Yue and he knew she thought the same thing.
- - - - - - - - - -
PLUS ONE
Zuko was glad that the group decided to let him in only after a few hours of deliberation, he was still hesitant when it came to joining their little 'gaang', but he knew this had to be the right call. Fath- no. Ozai was planning on burning down the Earth Kingdom to the ground, regardless to the massive losses the Fire Nation was experiencing as the other nations began to ramp up their defenses and attack back against his nation. Ozai was going to drive his people into extinction if this continued. Either that, or the rest of the nations, just like Sozin did to the Air Nomads.
Zuko couldn't let that happen, this was- this had to be wrong. There had been enough death on all sided of this 100-year war. Things had to stop before more unnecessary loss. He already saw that Jet died in that Agni blasted play, he didn't blame Jet for attacking him, if he had been in the same situation he would've done the same. Especially if he had shared what Jet had with someone he considered an enemy.
It was a week before when Toph asked the big question, "So, do all of you know who your bonded too?"
Sokka groaned as Aang started to talk, "Oh! The first time I opened my eyes from the iceberg-" He was in an iceberg, that was news to Zuko, "I saw Katara staring down at me! I immediately felt drawn to her, but I didn't know why. It was only after we were penguin sledding that our bond solidified!"
Katara continued, "It was like the world opened it's eyes to us, and we could feel or see what the other was experiencing."
Toph and Sokka groaned, Zuko swore he heard one of them say, 'oogies' then Toph went on to say, "Of course you two are soulmate, I don't know why I even asked."
"For us it was different. The Northern water tribe practices a ritual at the ages of 8 that we're supposed to write on one of our wrists in hopes our bonded is able to respond. Because of my status as royalty I went through the ritual a year early, and to my fortune Sokka and Suki responded to my call. We had another soulmate who responded to my call as well, but we never heard from them again. We suspect they died three years ago after we all experienced life shattering spirit pains." Yue said, her eyes going sad as she said the last part. Suki held her hand from where she was laying on top of both Sokka and Yue's laps, as Sokka did the same sitting next to her.
Zuko's heart ached looking at their domestic display, but he couldn't allow him to think like that. He wasn't meant for them. That was when he realized the grou- gaang was looking at him. "I have, had soul bonds. They wrote to me once when I was really young, but I don't remember much of what they said. Soul bonds aren't a practice respected in the Fire Nation, especially for royalty, so as soon as the first messages formed I had to wrap myself in dark bandages so I wouldn't fall for the temptation."
"Bonds? So did you have multiple soulmates?" Aang looked sad, Zuko suspected that the Fire Nation's practices were different a 100 years ago, and his look only seemed to confirm it.
"Yeah.. I think so? But I don't remember much, especially because that was one of my.. my more important memories with my mother." Zuko had to look away, he scratched his head to feign nonchalantness, it hurt any time he mentioned his mother and he didn't wanna see the pitying, or more likely, sad looks they'd give him.
"Did you ever talk to them?"
"Suki.."
"I'm just asking him Sokka, he doesn't need to answer if he doesn't want to," Suki sat up, legs in Yue's lap as she leaned into Sokka's side, she looked at him with such earnest eyes that it was hard to not answer her.
"I think so? But I don't remember what I said."
He saw some of them look over to Toph, for some reason, and she seemed to shake her head, "He's telling the truth. Good on you, Sparky. At least you aren't being avoidant this time," she gave him a knowing smirk that seemed to just set him off.
"Hey! What is that supposed to mean?!"
The group laughed for awhile until it was time for them to all get some rest. They only had a few days left on Ember Island and they seemed to pass in no time. It wasn't long until Aang ran away, and the group tried to track him down, only to be unable to. Then Zuko was face to face to his uncle again, Zuko felt like he was suffocating under his presence. He felt like he had betrayed him, even if there really had been no other real choice for him. That didn't stop the guilt flowing through him, or the looks Sokka shot him both guilty and untrusting. It got better after he helped him save Suki and his father, but he couldn't fault Sokka for not trusting him, he never really wanted to fight them, but he'd wanted to go home so badly that he betrayed every part of himself to only fail in the end.
He was supposed to become the Firelord after this, he wasn't ready, he couldn't do this. What if he was like his father. He'd watched him kill mother when he was 11 he'd thought his father was gonna do the same to him, and he almost did when he was 13. He wasn't ready. He was only 16 for Agni's sake. He couldn't rule an entire nation! He just got his life together by joining the Avatar's group, and now he was supposed to go and rule and entire nation alone with no one to talk to! His new friends, or whatever they thought they were to him, hated the Fire Nation, let alone living there. He remembered their long rants and stories about their time in the Fire Nation, and even more about their complaints in Ember Island. He was gonna be all alone again and Aang was gonna have to come down and kill him just like he was gonna have to for his father and sister-
"Zuko?"
He realized he was outside of his uncle's tent, when did it became hard to breathe. He tried to respond but it was like he was inhaling smoke. Smoke and his father was gonna burn him! Burn him and take away his other eye! Just like the memory of his mother!
"Zuko!" Arms were around him, then one moved to wip his face, when did it get so wet? "Hey. Hey, look at me. What's wrong?" Suki? That was Suki's voice. Right, he wasn't in the palace, he was outside by the White Lotus settlement.
No, no, no. Why did he have to be so weak? Katara hated him, Sokka didn't trust him, Yue probably pitied him, Toph tolerated him, and he burned down Suki's village and now she was comforting him when all of this was his fault. He was weak. Too weak to have a soulmate. Too weak to have a home to go back to. And she was comforting him!
"Hey.." She helped him to the ground and wrapped her arms around him. There was nothing he could do but follow and put his face into the crook of her neck so she wouldn't see his shame, "It'll be okay, Zuko. You don't have to talk if you don't want to, but I'll be right here if you do"
Talk to her? He had no right to talk to her and burden her even more. He'd already done so much to her, destroyed her home, lust over her and her partners, and still she gives so much. It's unfair how much he wants this, how much he just wants to be held like his mother once did after one of his nightmares. She already had the best soulmates anyone could want and he was just getting in the way. She was blessed by the spirits, while he's here rejecting them over people he can't even seem to remember.
"I think I'm now just starting to.. process everything. I'll be fine now." He should get up, wipe his tear, and pretend this never happened, but he couldn't muster the energy. He didn't wanna get up, but he knew he had to so he forced himself to move reluctantly out of her hold, she seemed just as reluctant to let him go.
They didn't talk about it again. They didn't talk about how she seemed to understand his pain without him saying anything. They didn't talk about how he seemed to, unconsciously, move closer to the three. They didn't talk about how they seemed to do the same. How Suki trained with him on their last day, if only to remember the sight of his face. How Yue seemed to chech over him for unseen injuries more then the others. How Sokka seemed to try and make jokes around him even more. They didn't talk about it. And now that he was here, standing in front of his sister, he wished they had.
- - - - - - - - - -
Suki and Yue had been separated from Sokka and Toph, and felt the excruciating pain he went through once he broke his leg, but that was nothing compared to the pain the three of them felt when they were all together. It was like lightning went through their heart. Toph had to bend the metal around them, so they wouldn't fall of the ship they just barely claimed with Suki's hand-to-hand combat and Yue's waterbending. It felt like, for a moment, like they were dying. It was the same feeling that Yue and Sokka heard Katara explain, while gasping out tears, as Aang began to lose more and more of his heart rate.
As soon as they saw the sky turn blue they guided the ship to meet Katara at the palace. They assumed she was fine because Aang didn't seem too worried when they met up with him. He was concerned of course, but he hadn't felt any physical pain come over her, so they assumed she was fine.
That was until they landed and Katara launched herself, tears and all into Sokka's arms. She was inconsolable for what felt like hours when she finally gasped out, "its.. its Zu- ko.. he- he took a lightning blast to the heart.. and I don't know what to do.. I don't have any more water from the spirit oasis..!"
Suki looked over at her bonded immediately, lightning to the heart, they all feared what that may mean. They had suspected for the weeks they traveled with Zuko that their connection might go deeper, but.. but. If what Katara was saying was right, they might have known they're third soulmate for months, and they might now be losing him before seeing what that might mean.