Chapter Text
Home always smelled the same - stale smoke, damp carpet and something sour in the sink that never got cleaned properly. The smell clung to everything - curtains, clothes, hair. Vanessa barely noticed it anymore. It was just home. Fourth floor, peeling paint on the wall, graffiti carved into the bannister like people needed proof theyd been there at all. Someone had smashed the light on the landing again, so the hallway outside the door stayed in a kind of permanent half dark. You learned where to step, you learned what to not touch.
Vanessa kicked the door shut behind her with the back of her trainer. "Mum?" she called, already knowing the answer.
No reply, course not. She dropped her school bag on the floor, stepping over a pile of clothes that might have been clean once. The TV was on in the living room, no one was watching it. Just noise, filling space.
"Em?" she called out instead.
A small voice called from the bedroom, "In here."
Vanessa moved towards it, moving the door open with her shoulder. Emily, Vanessa's half sister, sat crossed legged on the bed, colouring in one of those cheap books with pages already torn out. She didn't look up straight away, just kept scribbling carefully inside the lines like it mattered.
"You're back late," Emily said.
"Detention."
"for what?"
"Backchat." Vanessa shrugged, flopping down beside her.
Emily frowned at that, frowned at that, like she always did when Vanessa said something she didn't quite understand. "They did it again, didn't they?"
Vanessa rolled her eyes, "Who?"
"Don't make me sound stupid, Ness."
Vanessa snorted, "Oi, don't go all mopey."
"You're Mopier, every time you come back from school."
That almost made Vanessa smile. Almost. Instead, she leaned back against the moulded wall, tilting her head against it, running her tongue along the gap between her from two teeth without thinking about it. "They're just bored."
"They're horrible."
"Same thing."
Emily didn't laugh. she just went back to her colouring, pressing harder than she needed to, the crayon snapping slightly at the tip. Vanessa watched. "Where's mum?"
Emily hesitated, "Out."
"Again?"
"Yep"
"What time did she leave?"
Emily shrugged. "She rang school to tell them im 'ill' again, then she made me a crisp butty and dashed it out the door."
Vanessa exhaled slowly, "Did she leave anything?"
"No." course not. Vanessa dragged a hand through her hair, already tangled from the day, from the wind, from people grabbing it in the corridor.
"Alright." she said. "I'll find something to make us for tea."
Vanessa went to the kitchen - if you could call it that. Cupboards half empty, one door hanging slightly off of its hinge. Sink full. Always full. She ignored it, heading straight for the bread. Two slices left. She stared at them, took one and left the other.
Back in the bedroom, she handed Emily half. Emily looked at it, "you have it."
"Don't be daft, I've eaten."
"liar"
Vanessa huffed a laugh, tearing the slice properly and shoving half of it into Emily's hand anyway. "Eat." Emily did. slowly.
School was worse the next day. It always was after detention. Like it painted a target on your back all over again. Vanessa kept her head down as she walked through the gates, hood up even though she wasn't allowed to. It didn't help, Nothing did.
“Oi—gap!”
There it was. Right on time. She didn’t turn. Didn’t react. Just kept walking. “Gap-tooth!” another voice called, louder this time. “Smile for us!” Laughter. Vanessa’s jaw tightened. Keep walking. Keep walking. A hand grabbed her shoulder, spinning her slightly.
“Why you always hiding your mouth, eh?” It was Jade. Of course it was Jade.
Vanessa pulled her shoulder free. “Get off me.”
“Ooo, she speaks.”
“Go away.” Jade leaned in slightly, grinning wide, perfect teeth on display like it was deliberate.
“Let’s see it then,” she said. “Go on. Big smile.”
Vanessa said nothing.
“Go onnn,” Jade dragged out, mocking. “Or are you embarrassed?”
Her friends laughed behind her. Vanessa swallowed, feeling the heat crawl up her neck. “Not embarrassed,” she said flatly.
“Then smile.”
Vanessa hesitated. Just for a second. And that was enough. Jade saw it. Knew she’d hit something, “Thought so,” she smirked. “Looks like a bloody missing fence panel.” Laughter again. Louder.
Vanessa shoved past her. “Pathetic,” she muttered.
“Say that again,” Jade snapped.
Vanessa kept walking. Didn’t stop. Didn’t turn. But her ears burned all the way to class.
She didn’t smile that day. Not once. Not even when she was supposed to. Not even when a teacher made a joke. She kept her lips pressed tight, like holding something in. Like if she let it slip, they’d all see it. Which they would. Which they always did. At lunch, she sat on the far edge of the playground, picking at a packet of crisps someone had left behind. Probably stale. She didn’t care. A group of girls walked past, glancing at her, whispering. One of them mimed a wide, exaggerated gap with her fingers over her teeth. Vanessa looked away.
Pretended she hadn’t seen. Pretended it didn’t matter. It always mattered.
That night, their mum came back. Late. Stumbling slightly, keys jangling too loudly in the door. Vanessa was still awake, lying on top of the covers, staring at the ceiling. Emily was asleep beside her. The front door slammed. Then footsteps. Then a voice, too loud, too bright. “Girls? My girls—where are my girls?”
Vanessa closed her eyes briefly. Here we go. She got up, stepping out into the hallway.“Mum.”
“There you are!” her mum beamed, arms outstretched. “Come here, darling.”
Vanessa hesitated. Then stepped forward, letting herself be pulled into a hug that smelled like cigarettes and something sharper underneath.
“You’ve grown,” her mum said, pulling back to look at her. “Haven’t you? You look—oh, you look lovely.”
Vanessa pressed her lips together instinctively. “Do I.”
“Yes!” her mum insisted. “So pretty. Such a pretty girl.”
Vanessa forced a small smile. Didn’t show her teeth. “Where’ve you been?” she asked.
“Out,” her mum said vaguely. “Sorting things. Big things. Things are going to change, Vanessa, I can feel it.”
Vanessa nodded slowly. “Right.”
“I mean it,” her mum said, suddenly serious. “We’re not staying like this. Not forever. I won’t let that happen to you girls.”
Vanessa swallowed. Didn’t say what she was thinking. Her mum smiled again, too wide, too quick.m“Good girl.”
And just like that, she drifted past her, into the living room, turning the TV up louder like it would fill everything that was missing. Vanessa stood in the hallway for a moment longer. Then turned back toward the bedroom. Emily stirred slightly as she climbed back into bed. “Is she back?” she mumbled.
“Yeah.”
“Is she okay?”
Vanessa hesitated. Then, softly: “Yeah. She’s fine.”
Emily nodded sleepily, settling again. Vanessa stared at the ceiling once more. Listened to the TV blaring. Listened to her mum talking to herself in the other room. Listened to the building creak and groan around them. Fourteen. Stuck. Invisible in all the wrong ways, seen in all the ones that hurt.She ran her tongue along the gap in her teeth again, pressing against it like she could push it closed if she tried hard enough. Didn’t work. Nothing ever did. But still— she tried.
Summer in Hackney was shit. That’s the only way to word it. It came in sticky, restless waves—heat clinging to the walls, turning the flat into something airless and sour. Windows stayed open no matter what crawled in, because closing them felt like suffocating. Vanessa lay sprawled across the living room floor, one arm flung over her face, the TV muttering to itself in the background. The carpet scratched at her skin, but the floor was cooler than the sofa, and that was enough.
Somewhere outside, kids were shouting. Music thumped faintly from a passing car. A dog barked, sharp and relentless.
"Vanessaaa."
She didn’t move.
"Vanessa, I know you’re not dead."
"Debatable," she muttered.
A trainer nudged her side. "Get up."
"No."
"Come on."
"No."
Another nudge, harder this time. "I swear I’ll pour that drink on you."
Vanessa cracked one eye open. "You wouldn’t."
Her mate, Ellie, grinned down at her, holding a half-melted bottle of orange Fanta. "Try me, gap."
Vanessa sat up immediately."Don’t call me that."
"Then get up."
Vanessa dragged herself upright with a groan, hair sticking to her face. "Why are you so loud?"
"Because it’s summer," Ellie said, like that explained everything. "We’re meant to be outside, living
our lives, not rotting in your haunted flat."
Vanessa snorted. "Bit rude. It’s my house."
"It’s got mould."
"So?"
Ellie rolled her eyes, dropping onto the sofa and kicking her feet up like she owned the place. "Where’s your mum?"
Vanessa shrugged. "Out."
"Shock."
"Yeah."
"Emily?"
"Downstairs, I think. With that girl from number twelve."
Ellie nodded, already losing interest. She reached into her bag and pulled something out with a kind of reverence. A crumpled tabloid.
Vanessa groaned. "Oh, not that again."
"Yes, that again," Ellie said, smoothing it out on her lap. "You’re actually so boring."
"It’s the same people every time."
"And?"
"And nothing happens."
Ellie gasped, genuinely offended. "Nothing happens? Are you mad? Everything happens."
Vanessa flopped back slightly, peering over lazily. "It’s just posh people doing posh things."
"It is not," Ellie insisted. "It’s drama."
Vanessa raised an eyebrow. "Go on then. What’ve they done now?"
Ellie grinned, tapping the page. "Right—listen to this."
Vanessa sighed, but she listened anyway. "'Golden trio cause chaos once again—'"
"Already bored."
"Shut up," Ellie snapped. "You have to understand the lore."
"The lore?"
"Yes. There’s history."
Vanessa snorted. "Go on then, historian."
Her mate cleared her throat dramatically. "Daniel Montgomery," she began, pointing to a picture. "Future lord something-or-other. Filthy rich. Bit of a menace. Very fit."
Vanessa glanced at the grainy photo. Blonde. Clean-cut. Smug. "Looks like he’d ignore you at a party."
"I’d let him," Ellie said instantly.
"Of course you would."
"And this—" she tapped the next photo, "—is Alexandra Carter. His girlfriend—or... no, what do they call it? Courter? Nah, let’s say girlfriend."
Vanessa leaned in slightly despite herself. The picture was clearer. Big dark curly hair. Sharp features. Something cold about her, even through cheap print. "She looks mean."
"She looks iconic," Ellie corrected. "And she’s loaded. Family’s got farms or estates or something. Old money." Another enthusiastic tap. "And this is Matthew. Her twin."
Vanessa squinted. He looked like Alex, but rougher. Less polished. Like he didn’t care to be. But they looked so frighteningly similar. "There’s always a twin," she muttered.
"He’s trouble," Ellie said excitedly. "Always in fights, always doing something dodgy. Absolute nightmare."
Vanessa leaned back again. "Sounds exhausting."
"Sounds fun."
"For you, maybe."
Ellie ignored that, scanning the article. "Apparently they were seen at some party in... where is this... Sussex? And Matthew got into it with someone, and Daniel nearly punched a photographer—"
"Shocking," Vanessa deadpanned.
"—and Alex just stood there like a queen while it all happened."
Vanessa huffed a small laugh. "Course she did."
Ellie looked up. "You don’t get it."
"No, I do," Vanessa said. "They’re rich, they’re pretty, and they get away with everything."
"That’s not the point." Ellie shook her head, exasperated. "They’re interesting."
Vanessa gestured vaguely around them. "So are we."
Ellie glanced at the peeling walls, the broken lamp, the empty cupboard door hanging open. "...Not in the same way."
Vanessa smiled, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. "Yeah. Didn’t think so."
Then her mate brightened again, flipping the page. "Ooh—listen to this bit."
Vanessa groaned. "I regret asking."
"'Sources say tensions between Montgomery and Carter have been rising—'"
Vanessa paused. "...What?"
Ellie smirked. "See? Now you’re interested."
"I’m not."
"You are."
"I’m not."
"You literally said, 'What?'"
Vanessa rolled her eyes. "Just read it."
Ellie grinned wider. "'Rising tensions between Montgomery and Carter suggest all may not be well behind closed doors...'" Vanessa frowned faintly."Meaning," Ellie said, leaning in, "they might be breaking up."
Vanessa let out a small, disbelieving laugh. "Right. Sure."
"It says it here."
"It also says aliens exist if you read enough of those things."
"This is different."
“How?"
"Because... it just is. Shut up, Ness."
Vanessa snorted.
Ellie ignored her again, eyes scanning quickly. "Apparently he was seen leaving some event early without her."
"So?"
"So that’s suspicious."
"Or he was bored."
"Or they had a fight."
"Or he needed the toilet."
Ellie threw a cushion at her. "You’re so annoying."
Vanessa laughed, dodging it. "You’re obsessed."
"Am not."
"You are."
"Am not."
"You literally bring that paper everywhere."
"It’s important."
"It’s rubbish."
"It’s research."
Vanessa shook her head, smiling despite herself. "You fancy him, don’t you?"
Ellie didn’t even hesitate. "Obviously. I’d actually die if I met him."
"He wouldn’t even look at you."
"Rude."
"True."
Her mate narrowed her eyes. "At least I’ve got a type."
"What’s my type then?"
Ellie looked her up and down, smirking. "Anyone who’ll have you.”
"Vanessa laughed, louder this time. "Brilliant."
"Sorry, had to be said."
Vanessa leaned back again, staring at the ceiling. "Imagine caring that much about strangers."
"Imagine not," her mate shot back.
Silence settled for a moment, broken only by the faint buzz of the TV. Then— "Do you think it’s true?" Vanessa asked suddenly.
Ellie blinked. "What?"
"The thing. About them... fighting."
Her grin returned instantly. "I knew you cared."
"I’m just asking."
"Mm-hm."
Vanessa nudged her foot, "Just answer."
Ellie shrugged. "Maybe. They’re always together though."
"So?"
"So that usually means something."
"Or it means they’ve got nothing better to do."
"Vanessa," Ellie said, exasperated, "they have everything better to do."
"Exactly."
Vanessa frowned slightly. "They don’t look happy," she muttered.
Ellie looked at her. "What?"
"In the pictures," Vanessa said, gesturing vaguely. "They don’t look... happy."
Ellie glanced down at the page again. "They look fit."
"
That’s not quite the same thing."
"They’re rich. That’s basically happiness."
Vanessa snorted quietly. "Is it?"
"Yeah."
"Right."
Ellie tilted her head, studying her. "What’s that meant to mean?"
"Nothing."
"No, say it."
Vanessa shrugged. "Just... money doesn’t fix everything, does it?"
Her mate blinked. "Pretty sure it fixes most things."
Vanessa didn’t argue. Didn’t bother. Instead, she reached for the paper, pulling it closer. She looked at the photos properly this time. Daniel—smirking, like he knew something everyone else didn’t. Alex—cold, composed, untouchable. Matthew—half out of frame, mid-laugh or mid-fight, impossible to tell. They looked... distant. Even standing next to each other. Like there was something off. But Vanessa didn’t lean back this time. Didn’t fully relax. Because something about it—about them—didn’t sit right. Like the story wasn’t as simple as it looked. Like there was something underneath all that gloss and flash. Something messy. Something real. But then again... what did she know? She was just a girl in a crumbling flat in Hackney, with half a slice of bread for lunch and a gap in her teeth she couldn’t hide. They were... something else entirely. Untouchable. Unreachable. A different world. Vanessa leaned back eventually, closing her eyes again as her mate kept reading, her voice rising and falling with exaggerated excitement. Outside, the sun dipped slightly, but the heat stayed. Sticky. Relentless. And somewhere, miles away, in a place Vanessa couldn’t even picture properly, those three kept living their lives. Messy. Loud. Complicated. While hers stayed exactly the same. Or so it seemed.