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The stench of smoke filled the meteors kitchen, coating the walls with an ashy haze that threatened to set off alarms and wake the entire building. Dave cursed as he fished his meal out of the metal grate of the toaster. He didn't have a ton of experience with cooking, but he figured he should have been able to make something as simple as toast.
He placed the charred remnants of his food on the plate, staring at it with resignation as he opened the fridge. Might as well try to salvage it, over time he's found that most meals can be improved by salt and butter.
KARKAT: ARE YOU STARTING FIRES IN HERE??
Karkat coughed as he fanned the smoke around him. Dave turned his torso slightly to meet Karkat's gaze, balancing the toast in his hand as he smeared butter across its surface
DAVE: you could say that
DAVE: in the way that a smolder is almost a fire
DAVE: so starting one yes but its not exactly a fully fledged fire yet
DAVE: sorry to disappoint
Karkat craned his head to see the charred slice in his hand, a grimace tugging on his lips.
KARKAT: ARE YOU SERIOUSLY GOING TO EAT THAT? DON'T BE RIDICULOUS.
DAVE: nah man im gonna do it
DAVE: see this is a delicacy where im from
KARKAT: I SERIOUSLY DOUBT IT?? I'VE NEVER SEEN ANOTHER HUMAN EAT SHIT AS BURNT AS THAT
DAVE: no not earth i meant texas
DAVE: its so hot there everything burns up immediately you kind of develop a taste for it
DAVE: burning the hell out of my food just makes me feel close to home yknow
KARKAT: I LIVED ON ALTERNIA AND I HAVE NEVER FELT THAT WAY IN ANY CAPACITY
DAVE: ok but texas was hotter
Dave maintains composure as he lies straight to Karkat's face. Alternia was probably closer to Arizona in temperature if he had to guess, but he won't pass up a little goat-getting.
KARKAT: DON'T EAT THAT
DAVE: no im dead set on it
KARKAT: DAVE SHUT UP DON'T EAT THAT
KARKAT: GIVE IT UP
His tone is almost like someone telling a dog to drop a shoe.
DAVE: too late its halfway to the station
DAVE: after a long ass ride because trains are slow as shit
DAVE: really if you haven't stopped the train by now its your own fault because of how long it takes to get there
DAVE: youd think someone threw their body on the tracks but no its just that slow all the time
DAVE: really if someone did that theyd probably just get lightly rolled by the big metal shovel at the front all the way to the station aka my mouth
Karkat lunges for the toast, prompting Dave to flashstep to the side as he puts the entire piece in his mouth in one fell swoop.
KARKAT: YOURE BEING AN ASSHOLE??? AND YOU CAN'T SAY AKA OUT LOUD.
KARKAT: LOOK AT ALL THE CRUMBS, THAT'S LIKE HALF YOUR MEAL RIGHT THERE.
Dave takes a look down at his plate, covered in little black granules, and slowly brings it up to his face. In a disgusting show of defiance, he licks the dust up in one go. Karkat stares at him in disbelief, eyes bugged like he's never seen such a display of spite before. Dave raises his eyebrows in expectance.
DAVE: there's actually like a ton of carcinogens (haha) in here but i doubt heart attacks are a heroic death so i would say you probably shouldnt eat this even though i myself am gonna continue to indulge in the lone star delight
DAVE: just dont get too jealous
KARKAT: I'LL TRY
KARKAT: I THINK IM JUST CONFUSED BECAUSE WE CAN LITERALLY CREATE FOOD BUT YOU ELECT TO EAT ACTUAL SHIT
DAVE: dude dont dunk on burnt toast its my favorite food
DAVE: thats really insensitive
DAVE: i opened up to you about my cultural traditions and what do i get in return
DAVE: whole lotta judgement
Karkat makes a tense strangling motion with his hands for a moment, then smashes his hands against his face in exasperation.
KARKAT: OK BUT ACTUALLY THOUGH WHY WONT YOU JUST MAKE MORE FOOD.
DAVE: listen if im gonna be cooking i gotta own up to my blunders
DAVE: poor slice of bread gets all burnt up by my hands im not just gonna throw it away like yesterdays trash
DAVE: im gonna eat it
DAVE: its not its fault that i left it in the toaster for 10 minutes sometimes shit happens and you have to deal
KARKAT: NO YOU DON'T???
KARKAT: I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH THAT WE CAN MAKE WHATEVER FOOD WE WANT.
KARKAT: I DON'T THINK WE EVEN HAVE TO COOK IT? WE CAN JUST MAKE IT PRECOOKED. THAT'S WHAT I DO, IT'S NOT THAT HARD.
DAVE: but what if the day comes where the alchemizer shits itself and can only make like little green cubes or whatever and then we have to eat each other to survive
DAVE: then we'll really regret not rationing our bread
KARKAT: I HAVE NEVER SEEN YOU THIS NEUROTIC ABOUT ANYTHING BEFORE SO I KIND OF JUST DON'T BELIEVE YOU.
DAVE: christ
He pinches the bridge of his nose, shades lifting enough to show off his eyes squinted in annoyance
DAVE: im just trying to eat my breakfast man ill remake it if itll get you off my bulge
KARKAT: FUCK YOU DON'T ACT LIKE I'M THE ONE BEING IRRATIONAL
KARKAT: AND I'M NOT SAYING MAKE MORE AFTER YOU ALREADY SHOVED IT DOWN YOUR THROAT, JUST REMAKE IT FROM THE GET GO
KARKAT: THAT'S NOT A CRAZY THING TO SAY
DAVE: listen im not gonna waste food
DAVE: im fine eating burnt shit but ill try not to burn it if it bothers you so much
DAVE: just go back in time n pop that sucker out of the toaster bam good as new
KARKAT:
KARKAT: FINE.
Karkat stepped out of the kitchen, not wanting to waste any more of his lifespan on the guy. It wasn't out of character for Dave to be so contrary, but this instance served to tick him off more than usual. He was trying to help, but he just would! not! listen!!!
As he traveled down the meteor's halls a clawing feeling would begin to overtake him, Dave's grimace stuck to his skull. It was an understatement to say that he was… weird with food. Karkat thought it was a human thing at first, but unless Rose was just maladjusted overall, her habits seemed notably different. She didn't eat as fast or as much as Dave, and over time grew out of bringing her meals to her hive unlike her twin.
His aloofness was concerning, though. They'd never had a conversation about it but if his defensiveness was any sign, they probably wouldn't have any more for a good while.
Eventually his frustration would fade, but a discomfort would remain as dinnertime approached. Usually everyone would alchemize whatever food tickled their fancy, but rarely when somebody decided to cook there'd be a good amount of leftovers. At least, until Dave would claim them for himself and hide away in his room. Karkat thought it was actually pretty selfish, but nobody else seemed to have a problem with it for some reason, so he never called it out.
When Dave did eat with others, it was too much too fast. It was kind of hard to watch, all things considered. Even though there wasn't exactly day or night on the meteor, they all still functioned like there was, with routine meals and consistent sleep schedules. Well, at least everyone but Kanaya. Tonight was one of those nights where somebody insisted on cooking enough for everyone, and so Karkat would find himself sat next to Dave at the dining room table as the meteor's occupants, sans Gamzee, chatted with one another.
ROSE: I think I've always preferred frozen pizza to delivery.
DAVE: well anything you ordered took hours to get to your place right
DAVE: after that long its bound to be pretty bad
ROSE: Well yes, that definitely contributed, but even on the rare occasion that I got my meal by a decent time it was still lackluster.
ROSE: I prefer lots of frozen food, I find that it's more dependable.
KANAYA: To Specifically Alchemize A Frozen Pizza Is Interesting
KANAYA: It Wouldn't Have To Be A Delivered Item It Could Just Be A Regular Meal That Was Also Freshly Prepared
ROSE: I don't recall ever having freshly made pizza. My mom had gone through the effort of cooking one for me once, but I refused to partake.
KANAYA: It Could Be A Nice Momento To Bake One Sometime
VRISKA: If you do can we pleaseeeeeeee make anything other than pepperoni?
VRISKA: It sucks 8ad. There has to 8e more toppings than that.
TEREZI: 1 TH1NK W3 SHOULD DO 4 M3AT LOV3RS
VRISKA: Noooooooo I h8 that idea! Less pepperoni! Less!!!!!!!!
TEREZI: W1TH P1N34PPL3 4ND MUSHROOMS >:]
VRISKA: Gross!!!!!!!! Blegh!!!!!!!! No!!!!!!!!
ROSE: I'm partial to mushrooms myself.
TEREZI: W3LL TH3N 1T'S S3TTL3D!
VRISKA: ::::(
Terezi sauntered over and placed the two cooked pizzas down on the table, both sliced unevenly, though it would be futile to criticize her handiwork. Karkat took one of the mid sized slices. He'd had his fair share of pizza over their time on the meteor, it was easy enough to share so it tended to go overused. Communal dinners were less about the food and more about keeping up morale, and were usually followed by a movie or game.
As the meal drew on Karkat was trying to keep adding to the conversation but it was a little hard when his seatmate kept reaching past him for a slice every few minutes. He gave Kanaya a look to signal his grievance, but she just raised her brows in some ambiguous and frankly kind of condescending gesture. He slumped back in his seat, defeated.
The night continued with the crew migrating to one of the main rooms. Vriska and Terezi hung back in the kitchen, laughing over their drinks about something incomprehensible while the rest of them paid scarce attention to a romcom Karkat put on. They'd seen this one before so his feelings weren't especially hurt, more than anything it was background noise. It was nice to have human movies added to the roster but he'd almost always pick a troll movie, Rose and Dave didn't seem to mind anyway. The former was leaning against Kanaya and knitting something incredibly intricate from what he could tell. Dave, though, had suddenly stood from his slouched, almost horizontal position with a strange expression.
DAVE: i think im gonna turn in
His fist was clenched at his side,
DAVE: thanks for hanging out
DAVE: stay cool yhear
The mayor gave a small wave as Dave turned and left. Once he was at a respectful distance, Karkat made a gesturing motion to Kanaya
KARKAT: (IS HE NOT BEING SUPER WEIRD?)
KANAYA: Not Especially? From My Understanding He's Always Like That.
ROSE: Dave is super weird, but it's not weird of him to be super weird.
KANAYA: Exactly.
KARKAT: (AM I JUST NOT AN OBSERVANT PERSON? I SWEAR HE'S ACTING STRANGER THAN USUAL.)
KANAYA: Why Are You Whispering???
KARKAT: I MEAN
KARKAT: I GUESS I DIDN'T WANT TO BE RUDE.
ROSE: He'll be fine, I think we've all become used to your declarations of strangeness by now. We're all mad here you know.
KANAYA: Is There A Reason Why You're So Worried? It's Not Out Of Character For Him To Be So Reclusive.
Karkat fumbled with a loose string on his sweater cuff
KARKAT: WELL WE HAD AN ARGUMENT THIS MORNING, SO I GUESS I'M A LITTLE ON EDGE.
Roses peered up from her project, lips pursed in that kind of smug way where you could tell she was picking you apart in her mind. Karkat crossed his arms and leaned back, avoiding her gaze.
KARKAT: NOT LIKE. A REAL ARGUMENT. WE JUST PISSED EACH OTHER OFF AND WALKED AWAY. AND IT'S NOT LIKE WE'RE ON BAD TERMS, I'M NOT MAD AT HIM.
KANAYA: Are You Sure? You Seemed Fairly Mad Earlier.
ROSE: Perhaps 'We're all mad here' is inaccurate, in fact, everyone except Karkat is absolutely bouncing off the walls.
KARKAT: WHAT?? WHAT THE FUCK NO. I WASN'T ACTUALLY UPSET.
Kanaya raised an eyebrow. God dammit he could not deal with this much sass right now, he would not be gaslit into thinking HE was the crazy one.
KARKAT: NOOO DON'T GIVE ME SHIT.
KANAYA: I Didn't Say Anything.
KARKAT: YOU KNOW WHAT, I'VE HAD ENOUGH. EVERYONE CAN GO GALLAVANTING AROUND ACTING LIKE DAVE ISN'T SHITTING HIS GODDAMN PANTS SWEATING LIKE A MUSCLEBEAST AT NOON AND I'LL JUST LEAVE IT AT THAT.
KARKAT: WHO CARES! I DEFINITELY DON'T NOW, NOW THAT I KNOW THIS IS TOTALLY FUCKING NORMAL.
Karkat got off the couch in a huff, throwing his hands up in exasperation before leaving.
KANAYA: If You Leave We'll Change The Channel.
KARKAT: I DON'T CARE DO WHATEVER YOU WANT.
It was already pretty late from what he could tell, so he wasn't too miffed about ending the movie early. He'd probably find himself heading to bed around this time anyway even without the pestering. Karkat made his way down the long hallways of the meteor, headed to his room before a retching sound made him stop in his tracks.
Karkat paused, waiting a moment in front of the bathroom door when he heard the sound again, and then slow, labored breaths from the other side. His hand hesitated over the doorknob, should he, like, comfort whoever was in there? There was always the chance it was Gamzee or something and he wasn't really prepared to hold his hair back at the moment.
KARKAT: UM, ARE YOU OKAY?
It was quiet for a beat.
DAVE: yeah
His voice echoed lowly, a bit more hoarse than Karkat was used to hearing. He turned his head towards the hall he'd just walked down, feeling partially vindicated alongside his worry.
KARKAT: DO YOU NEED HELP?
DAVE:
DAVE: no
Karkat scoffed, then turned the knob and walked in. Thankfully it wasn't locked.
KARKAT: IM ASSUMING YOU'RE DECENT.
DAVE: yeah
Dave was on the floor, leaning against the toilet seat. His shades were discarded on the linoleum tile, but he still didnt lift his head from where it was resting on his arm.
Karkat crouched down to sit on the bathmat, across from Dave in a perfectly awkward manner that they always seem to find themselves in. Dave ran a hand through his hair, Karkat fixated his gaze on the purple fibres under him.
KARKAT: SO IS THIS A REGULAR THING FOR YOU OR?
Dave bristled, bright teary eyes focusing on Karkat in a way that made him immediately regret saying anything.
DAVE: what the fuck is that supposed to mean
KARKAT: SORRY, GOD. I DON'T KNOW WHY I SAID THAT.
DAVE: no i dont make a point of puking my guts out often
DAVE: it just happens ok
He sniffed, pointedly looking into the bowl of the toilet. Karkat drew his mouth into a straight line, he was not prepared to handle this in the slightest.
KARKAT: YOU KNOW YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT YOUR WEIGHT, RIGHT? YOU CAN UM, YOU CAN TALK TO US ABOUT THIS KIND OF STUFF.
DAVE: what
KARKAT: AND WE HAVE RESOURCES YOU KNOW, I'M NOT TRYING TO PRY INTO YOUR BUSINESS OR ANYTHING BUT I MEAN, WE ALL JUST WANT THE BEST FOR YOU.
KARKAT: AND BULIMIA THAT'LL JUST, THAT'LL DESTROY YOUR TEETH.
DAVE: dude i dont have anorexia
KARKAT: I MEAN YEAH I ASSUMED NOT. WAIT, SORRY THAT'S SHITTY FORGET I SAID THAT.
KARKAT: I JUST MEANT LIKE BECAUSE OF THE VOMITING.
DAVE: no just. its not like that
DAVE: i dont think im fat or anything, i just ate too fast and it made me sick
DAVE: and im a guy so like
KARKAT: OH DON'T START.
KARKAT: IT'S JUST, I MEAN.
KARKAT: HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU DONE THIS?
Dave didn't move, a bead of sweat rolled off his face and into the bowl.
DAVE: i dont
He covered his mouth with his hand, eyebrows furrowed in confliction. He turned to Karkat and opened his mouth, but as soon as he did he paled, then lurched over the toilet seat and emptied his stomach.
Karkat stood, startled slightly as he went to cup Dave's shoulder, pushing his sweaty bangs up and out of his face.
KARKAT: OH MAN.
KARKAT: IT'S OKAY, COME ON.
His eyes were shut tight, hot tears squeezing out. The room was quiet, save for Dave's heavy breathing as he wiped the vomit from his mouth. Karkat sighed.
KARKAT: HERE, I'LL HELP YOU UP.
DAVE: mmgrp
Karkat led him over to the sink and turned both knobs on. Dave splashed water onto his face and scrubbed it furiously, pressing his fingertips into his eyes and sniffling.
Karkat grabbed his shades off the ground, using the bottom part of his sweater to clean the glass.
KARKAT: HERE YOU GO.
Dave patted his face with his own shirt and took his shades from Karkat, putting them on quickly.
KARKAT: SO.
DAVE: i dont know man
KARKAT: DAVE THIS IS FUCKED UP, DO YOU KNOW THAT?
DAVE: ill work on it ok just dont make this a thing please
KARKAT: NO. THIS IS A THING NOW, I'M NOT GONNA PRETEND LIKE IT ISN'T.
DAVE: jesus man its not a big deal
DAVE: wait
DAVE: is this about the bread
KARKAT: IT'S A LOT OF THINGS NOT
DAVE: oh fuck off
KARKAT: JUST THE BREAD! YOU'VE BEEN
DAVE: you need to calm down
KARKAT: REALLY WEIRD ALL DAY AND EVERYONE'S BEEN ACTING LIKE IT'S NORMAL BUT IT'S NOT.
DAVE: have you considered that maybe youre the one whos acting like a tool
KARKAT: OK WELL I'M NOT AND I ALSO DIDN'T SAY THAT.
KARKAT: LISTEN.
DAVE: no man im not gonna
He gagged, leaning over the sink.
DAVE: fuck
DAVE:
DAVE: fine
KARKAT: HOW OFTEN DO YOU DO THIS?
DAVE: i dont fucking know dude
KARKAT: JUST APPROXIMATE
DAVE: a couple times a week i guess
DAVE: I don't exactly tally it
KARKAT: WHY?
DAVE: well I'm not putting it down in a journal
DAVE: hold on i have to clear my schedule to make room for my puking habit
KARKAT: NO, UGH, I MEAN WHY DO YOU DO IT SO OFTEN.
DAVE: i told you man i just eat too fast
KARKAT: THAT'S KIND OF A HUGE FUCKING UNDERSTATEMENT.
Dave sighed.
DAVE: uh
DAVE: well
He scratched the back of his head.
DAVE: if i'm being completely real
DAVE: i think it has to do with how i ate growing up
Karkat hummed, he probably could have guessed that was the case. Dave had given him a pretty decent idea of what his early life was like, whether through offhand mentions or full word vomit. In this case in a more literal sense.
DAVE: im not gonna get into it but i didn't have shit to eat but swords most of the time
DAVE: and what i could find i would usually have to hide if i wasnt gonna tear into it right then and there
DAVE: so you can uh imagine
DAVE: that i would get a little territorial
DAVE: and sometimes that bleeds into now
KARKAT: NO YEAH THAT'S, THAT'S FAIR.
KARKAT: JUST. UH.
KARKAT: YOU KNOW NONE OF US ARE GOING TO TAKE FOOD FROM YOU, AND I REALLY AM SERIOUS WHEN I SAW WE HAVE INFINITE SUPPLIES
DAVE: yeah no I know
DAVE: its just hard to unwire something like that i guess
DAVE: running around and hiding shit all the time it sucks
KARKAT: YEAH I GET IT.
Dave bit his lip slightly
DAVE: shit yeah
DAVE: yeah you do
His voice was quieter as he said it. Contemplative. Karkat looked past the tint of his shades to see Dave's downcast eyes.
KARKAT: ARE YOU GOOD NOW?
Dave nodded.
DAVE: yeah i got it from here
KARKAT: NO, CMON MAN, I'M GONNA GET YOU SOME WATER.
DAVE: nah you dont have to do that
DAVE: no really its fine
Karkat was already walking back towards the kitchen, with Dave following. Rose and Kanaya were draped across the couch now with the latter spooning Rose, who was asleep. When Karkat walked through the living room she raised her head noiselessly to eye the two. Karkat waved and she squinted with suspicion, but laid back down as they rounded the corner.
The two were quiet as Karkat filled his glass. There was the consideration for Rose, but even if they were completely alone, he wouldn't have much to say. Dave was noticeably pensive, Karkat didn't want to pay it much mind, a heat rising to his cheeks.
Dave took the glass from his hands and downed it quick, prompting an eye roll from Karkat. Dave met his gaze and tilted the glass slightly to slow the last of the water.
He sighed, then leaned back on the counter. He allowed his eyes to close, the gentle thrum of the vents were usually a source of anxiety for him, but now acted as a sort of white noise.
DAVE: (im sorry i got mad at you)
He was close to his ear, he didn't notice that Dave had moved in so much.
KARKAT: (DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT MAN.)
DAVE: (no that was shitty of me you were just trying to help)
Karkats eyes fluttered open, in his peripheral Dave was leaning the opposite way, backlit by the kitchen windows.
KARKAT: (YOU'D DO IT FOR ME TOO.)
Dave turned his head in his direction, features obscured by the lighting.
DAVE: (still)
DAVE: (if you uh)
DAVE: (yknow have anything you wanna talk about)
DAVE: (with me)
Karkat raised his eyebrows, amused.
DAVE: (ill try to help however i can)
Karkat's face split into a smile, suddenly feeling awkward.
KARKAT: (SURE THING.)
Dave's gaze lingered on him for a moment, swirling the glass in his hand. He brought it to his lips.
KARKAT: (WHAT?)
DAVE: (nothing)
The ice maker went off beside them.
DAVE:
KARKAT: (IM GONNA—)
DAVE: (oh)
KARKAT: (YEAH ARE YOU ALL GOOD? FEELING—)
DAVE: (yep yep all good over here)
DAVE: (all vomited out)
KARKAT: (GOOD! GOOD.)
A beat passed between them, standing parallel to one another.
KARKAT: (NIGHT)
DAVE: (gnight)
Karkat opened his mouth, closed it, and turned, eyebrows furrowed. He walked back to his room, but paused by the couch where Kanaya was still wide awake.
KARKAT: (DID YOU, UM, HEAR ANY OF THAT?)
KANAYA: (Yes, All Of It.)
KARKAT: (OH.)
KARKAT: (WELL.)
KARKAT: (GOODNIGHT KANAYA.)
KANAYA: (Goodnight Karkat.)
He looked to Rose, burrowed into Kanaya's side, and then Dave, still standing in the kitchen. He huffed, a small twinge in his heart, and turned back down the hallway.