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Victor let Yuuri back into their hotel room and closed the door behind him. Yuuri stopped and turned back, his cheeks slightly blushing.
"Um... Victor? Was that... what was that?"
Meeting Victor's gaze, Yuuri stuttered but asked the question nonetheless.
"What was what?"
Victor was smiling, but there was a slight confusion began to grow.
"That you said...that..."
Yuuri paused for a long while, and said the words quietly.
"... we're engaged..."
"What do you mean?"
Victor was standing still, his head slightly tilted. Yuuri put the bags full of Victor's souvenirs gently to the side of the bed, and looked away from Victor for a moment.
"Are, we... really?"
Yuuri's voice was quiet as ever, but Victor could hear it. But the words Yuuri uttered was a little shaky, and Victor was confused.
"Are we not?"
Victor was confused, especially when he couldn't see Yuuri's face. Is he just being shy, or is there something wrong? He could only see Yuuri's ears, which looked like turning red, but he was not sure.
He sighed internally, but was all the more determined to find out why Yuuri is acting in the way he does.
Trying to keep the gentle voice, Victor asked.
"Why did you give me the ring for?"
Yuuri hesitated the answer.
"Um... it's a good luck charm.... so that I can do my best tomorrow..."
He was still looking away, facing the window.
Victor took a step closer to Yuuri and gently wrapped his arm around his shoulder, stroking his hair on one hand.
"Yes, I will stay close to you and won't leave"
Victor spoke slowly but with determination, meaning every single word he said.
"Isn't that what's being engaged is about?"
Victor could almost hear Yuuri's heartbeat. But he was not sure if that is a good thing or not.
"....Right.......But..."
Victor could only see Yuuri's face from a side, his cheeks still blushing (this time Victor was sure) and his voice sounded quietly. There was confusion in Yuuri's voice too, but Victor could discern, at least, Yuuri was not angry or upset. Victor decided to let him take his time.
"But... what?"
"Isn't there, like, expectations?"
Next moment, Yuuri turned back and faced Victor eye to eye.
"What do you mean?"
Victor is completely confused with the term "expectations." What is he starting now?
Yuuri, with a blush, kept talking, responding to the question.
"I want you to stay close to me until I win gold medal, but I don't have any right to bind you to me, like... like...engagement or marriage."
The last bit was trailed off softly, but Victor nevertheless heard everything.
He was confused. What is Yuuri saying? Victor stopped his stroking and tried to look into Yuuri's eyes. After a little silence, Yuuri opened his mouth, and start to speak in a quiet determination.
"You are Victor, Victor. You are my coach now but you are a world-class skater, and a world-class coach I will add, but the world is waiting for you. Yakov is waiting for you. Yurio is waiting for you. That's your future. Your future is waiting for you. I'm... I'm just borrowing your time. Just for this year. I know that I shouldn't be greedy. The ring was just my selfish act that I can feel you close to me when I do my best tomorrow. I will win, I will do my best, I want to win, but regardless of what happens, you are----"
"Shhhh, Yuuri"
Victor couldn't let Yuuri continue, as he was starting to get what Yuuri was getting into. He pushed his index finger on Yuuri's lips.
Determined Yuuri. Stubborn Yuuri. Victor remembered when he said "Please take care of me until I retire." It makes all sense now. It meant a lot to him at that time. It felt like a proposal for rest of his life. But Victor also knew that he was treating this year as something special. Victor was consciously and deliberately keeping open the prospect after the Grand Prix Final, because he wanted to respect what Yuuri decides.
And then, there was a ring. There were rings on both of their hands. Victor was overjoyed inside, but also didn't want to overwhelm Yuuri. After all, they were a lucky charm--- but at the same time, they were a promise. At least Victor assumed so. It was a promise to never leave and stay close. He didn't want to overwhelm Yuuri with his emotion, when Yuuri was going through his own.
That was the rationale behind Victor's mind when Phichit went ahead and start congratulating them over their marriage. No, Victor thought to himself, I was right. We were not married yet, but we did exchange our promises. We will stay close and never leave. Therefore: engagement. The promise of promise to stay together. It was such a clearly logical thought that just came out of his mouth naturally.
So the attitude Yuuri had after he said it perplexed Victor a little bit. But then, he understood it as his general shyness. He is slowly getting used to public display of affection, but not a declaration of romantic relationship. Come to think of it, there has always been a romantic tension between them, from the first day they met. Then Victor thought to himself, but we never put to words like this. Ok, granted. But from the day they started practicing, the days they started to know more about each other, the days they spent in Hasetsu and rinks all around the world for competition, Victor could see the same glimmer of light burning in Yuuri's eyes.
And then, Yuuri is now trying to move away from him, despite showing the same emotion that he has. Why would anyone think that giving a pair rings to yourself and your partner, a "selfish act," especially when your partner happily accepts it?
Victor couldn't let Yuuri go on like this. He grasped Yuuri's arms. After the hush, Yuuri's lips were tightly closed with tension, unsure of what Victor was trying to do. Victor slightly kneeled to met Yuuri's eyes, and called his name.
"Yuuri, listen."
Almost instinctively, Victor gently wrapped his both hands around Yuuri's cheeks, and he inhaled to utter the important words that Yuuri needed to hear.
"I, am, yours, now. ...Am I not?"
Victor said it slowly, trying to convey that each word of what he says he means it. Yuuri unconsciously uttered Victor's name. Taking it a good sign, Victor continued.
"You are not taking away my time. My future is to be with you. ...Have you thought about that?"
...How much I am in love with you? Victor kept his last sentence to himself, looking at Yuuri lovingly, who started to hold tears in his eyes. Stubborn Yuuri. Victor thought, I almost forgot you were never good with sensing other people's emotions. That's why it has to be said it out loud, as clear as an autumn sky.
"Whatever form our relationship takes, I can never leave you. I will never leave you. I will stay close to you, forever."
The moment the words reach, Yuuri could not hold his emotions any more. He did not know what to call the burst of feelings he began to feel at that moment. Tears started flowing down like a river, whimpering sound got out and Yuuri held on to Victor's shoulder. He cried like this in front of Victor before. But this time, both of them knew it was not of sadness or frustration.
Tears wet Victor's sweater, and Victor buried his face in Yuuri's head, taking in the scent of him.
"I told you: this is your lucky charm that you don't have to think about anything else."
...So, stop thinking pretending like you didn't mean it. I love that you meant it, deep in your heart, and I mean it too from my heart.
Victor moved off and took Yuuri's right hand and kissed the ring at their eye level.
"Unless you don't want to stay with me after the Grand Prix Final."
Yuuri shook his head right and left so strongly, too strong that drops of tears were falling off. Victor smiled softly. Realizing the mess he was creating, Yuuri smiled too.
Then Victor understood, that for whatever reason, the ring did not mean the same thing as he understood it. He was not 100% sure why that was the case, but regardless, he felt the need to clearly act on what needs to happen.
And then Victor took a breath.
"Now that I'm starting to feel that I'm not sure if you really had this in mind so let me say this... formally."
Victor smiled at Yuuri's slightly confused face. The smile on Victor's face was quickly replaced with the gaze of seriousness, just like how he skated the beginning of Stay Close To Me. With that piercing gaze, Yuuri's heart took a particularly loud beat. Next moment, Victor kneeled down, still holding Yuuri's hand, looking up, directly looking into the darker eyes.
"Will you marry me, Yuuri Katsuki?"
Yuuri thought that he screamed Victor's name, but nothing but gasp came out of his mouth. His face was covered in more tears. Unable to speak a single word, Yuuri nod again and again.
Victor stood up and hugged Yuuri gently and strongly, wrapping his head with his big two hands and gently pressed his lips to the other.
Still out of breath, Yuuri finally managed to say "Yes, of course, Victor.... Yes!"
This time, Victor felt something at the edge of his eyes.
They stayed like that for a while, smiling and crying, utterly taken over by the emotions that they shared. Victor gently kissed all over Yuuri's cheeks, head, temples, ears, nose, lips. Yuuri held onto Victor's shoulder tight as if he wouldn't be able to hold him again if he let go.
After a long silence and intermittent sniffles, Yuuri spoke quietly.
"How did you know what I was feeling...?"
"I don't know, we are on the same wavelength"
"You're always like that"
Victor's smile was sweet as ever, and Yuuri just loved the feelings of being held in his arms, looking at him so close. After another sniffle, Yuuri chuckled.
"So ok. I thought I was being discrete but I guess you knew what I was thinking"
"Hm?"
Victor looked at him confused. Yuuri looked down at his golden ring on his right hand.
"It was on purpose I asked you to show your right hand. Not left. So that I don't give any unnecessary ideas. To you, and others, too"
The missing puzzle piece finally came together, and all motion of Victor stopped. Noticing the change in Victor, Yuuri stopped smiling and looked at him, this time Yuuri was the one confused. Victor opened his mouth, but took a while to form a sentence.
"......Yuuri, you didn't know?"
"What?"
How can he explain? There is no reason Yuuri should have known this. But, nevertheless Victor was taken by the revelation.
"What , Victor, what?"
Yuuri pressed impatiently. Victor looked into Yuuri's eyes, and raised his right hand, golden ring shining on the ring finger.
"This is the hand that we wear marriage rings in my culture"
"...What!? Oh, oh no"
Almost instinctively, words came out of Yuuri's mouth. Victor frowned at what he just uttered.
"No? What do you mean, no?"
"No, not that! But... crap"
Yuuri denied what Victor was hinting immediately but could not help turning into the color like a tomato, and covered his face with both hands.
"Then, I look like an idiot...!!"
Victor burst into laughter.
"Yuuri, you are adorable"
Victor said, kissing Yuuri's cheek. Now he understood what exactly Yuuri was thinking, innocently, but nevertheless driven by the flare of desire that both shared.
"So you were trying to be sneaky, just slide it on here like this? And you thought I wouldn't think that it didn't mean anything more than it's a lucky charm?"
Victor couldn't resist the temptation of teasing his sweet lover, now fiancé.
Yuuri received Victor's side glance and looked away shyly.
"...But I thought right hand is obscure enough"
...You are truly adorable and you have no idea, Victor thought. And briefly contemplated the prospect of not having this conversation, hugging Yuuri closer. After a long pause, Victor opened his mouth.
"I'm glad you brought it up. Otherwise I was about to get dumped despite having a ring"
"Victor!"
Both of them burst into laughter, which lasted for a while that both of them felt that was the feeling that they want to have the rest of their lives, and they knew that they will.
Yuuri crossed his arum under Victor's and hugged him tight, and whispered into his year.
"I'm glad you said it out loud. I was a little bit embarrassed, like what Mari-nee and Minako-sensei might think of me, and it was quite unreal, that I felt that you're just saying to make everyone fired up."
"Well, most of all, you."
They both chuckled.
"Yeah, I know. But... I'm glad that you don't hesitate."
And that's what I love about you, Yuuri murmured in his mind.
Victor tried to look into his face but his shy fiancé's face was buried in his shoulder. When his face lifted a bit, there was a low mutter.
"I really had no idea what you were thinking, you know. I jus thought that you saw a potential in me as a skater and that in itself was incredibly amazing thing that I could't believe if it's real at first."
Victor chuckled.
"I said again and again you're the most amazing student a coach can have"
"That doesn't mean anything like this, Victor! Besides, you never told me and I never told you..."
Giving accent on "you" and "I," Yuuri looked up, meeting Victor's eyes, and stopped.
"Told you what?"
Victor's loving stare was directly in front of him. Yuuri started to blush again.
"That..."
"Say it, I want to hear it"
Victor's voice was as soft as it can be. After a long pause, Yuuri softly but firmly spoke out the words, looking into Victor's beautiful azure eyes.
"That I love you."
Victor's eyes widened. The words being said stopped Victor's breathing for a moment. The way Yuuri's composing himself told Victor how much this means to Yuuri himself. The gush of emotion overrun Victor, turned him into wide smile with blush, and he let the impulse to kiss Yuuri take over him.
"I love you too, my beautiful pork cutlet bow, Yuuri, my love"
Victor said at each pause between kisses. The direct expression of affection turned Yuuri into a shy smile.
"Victor, you're so over the top"
"Why? There's no one around here besides us. Nothing to worry about"
"I'm just.... I need to prepare myself mentally"
Yuuri buried his face in Victor's shoulder.
"Why?
"Because it's you Victor. You always ..... you know how to surprise me"
That's you, Victor thought, but he quietly stroked his back.
"In a good way, of course"
"Get used to it, fiancé"
Victor pulled Yuuri out of his shoulder and let their forehead touch each other's.
"Not sure I can, you're too gorgeous"
"Next to you, love. No one can beat you the banquet night. You were so hot"
"OK let's not talk about that!"
"Oh you have no idea."
Victor chuckled, kissed Yuuri's cheek again, and softly said,
"Come on, fiancé, let's change and get some sleep. Tomorrow is a big day"
"I know"
Yuuri hesitantly moved apart and they took each other's hands. Neither of them were ready to let go, even though they were not going anywhere. Both of them thought it was silly, and yet, they couldn't let go.
They showered, changed, and went to bed, keeping certain distance but always some part of their bodies touching, as if to make sure that the other won't disappear. Both of them were covered in the same blanket, on one of the twin beds.
"All your worry faded away?"
Victor asked Yuuri softly, stroking his cheek lovingly.
"Yeah... I think"
"You think?"
"I think. Now I'm just too excited to sleep"
"We're not doing anything tonight, you know that"
"I know, but... I'm just happy"
Instead of saying a word of agreement, Victor gave a goodnight kiss onto Yuuri's cheek, and watched him close his eyes.