Work Text:
[INTRO:]
One day some algae found our sun, it started to get cold. /
Us three astronauts decided, we were never getting old /
We could've had the moon and stars, were it not for those dots. /
We can't complain too badly, folks, cause its the life we got, /
[CHORUS:]
And we're banned from Earth, every one. /
Banned from Earth, just for having a little fun. /
We spent some jolly lives there for three decades or four, /
But ol' Earth doesn't want us anymore. /
[VERSE 1:]
Our Captain heard the call, one day, and knew he'd volunteer. /
He might want more days of sun, but soon that sun would disappear. /
Commanded in the skies, now he's commanding us in space. /
We trust him with the wheel when we get sling-shot from this place, /
[CHORUS]
[VERSE 2:]
Our engineers a cosmonaut by everyone adored. /
They had to get her off this earth, before she could get bored. /
She’s gonna try and save the world, she’ll give it her best shot. /
If you ask for a heroine, she'll hand you what she's got, /
[CHORUS]
[VERSE 3:]
Our scientist is serious, but not just clinical. /
In both the lab and bedroom careful observation's critical.
Until the time he launches, he'll make every minute count: /
His sexual odometer has doubled in amount! /
[CHORUS]
[VERSE 4:]
Our Director's got no seat on board, it doesn't mean she's safe. /
It makes a lot of enemies, to get a crew to space /
The Ruskies and the Yanks are still both somehow on her side. /
She tried to save the Earth, instead caused penguin genocide./
[CHORUS]
[REPEAT ALT CHORUS:]
And we're bound to Ceti, every one. /
Bound to Ceti, and we're gonna have some fun. /
Depending where you stand, its eleven years or four, /
We'll be missing our home Earth forever more! /
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[BONUS VERSE:]
Our tutor acts he's friendly, but he's got a history: /
Got fired cause he called one man 'a massive waste of C'. /
The Vat pays more than junior high, he's trying to be kind, /
But the astro-exercise is due 11:59! /