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Since his encounter with the Numbers, Seokju has been more withdrawn and exhausted than ever. He hid it well, but Ijin would catch him staring into the distance with a troubled frown. It wasn’t clear if it was due to his recent experience or just general anxiety, and for the first time, Ijin didn’t know how to ask him about it. He usually approached such situations bluntly, but this tactic felt counterproductive; Seokju made it clear from the start that he didn’t want to talk about what happened between him and the Numbers.
It was a stalemate and Ijin became increasingly irritated as the days passed.
Doctor Han told him that it was probably caused by their suppressed instincts and advised Ijin not to use anything that would block his scent and make it difficult for Seokju to sense his mood.
“Alphas tend to calm down when their omegas feel calm and content” he explained. “I understand that you prefer your scent to be hidden, but as we discussed earlier, it would be more beneficial for you to use less pheromone blocker in the second and third trimesters. The same goes for your alpha. You both would feel less stressed if you let his instincts respond to your mood freely, without interference. This can be a key psychological consideration, especially if a couple has not yet completed their marking.”
So Ijin bit the bullet and left his blockers alone. It didn’t magically solve the problem, but it had some undeniable advantages. Dayeon and his grandfather, who were both betas, became calmer and more free-spirited after a few days, and Ijin felt less on edge around them than at any time in weeks. As if the uncertainty that he didn’t belong among them had vanished. It was a strange yet comforting realization how his instincts recognized his family once the blockers were out of the picture, more deeply than his mind ever could have.
When Dayeon hugged him and rubbed her face against his shoulder before bed on the third night, Ijin found himself purring softly and taking a deep breath of her soft scent. It was mild, almost nonexistent, yet warm and homey, like honeyed white tea; something he had never really paid attention to before.
The next day, he showed up at Seokju’s place with strange excitement and a fluttery feeling in his stomach.
“Ijin!”
His boyfriend greeted him with his usual, wide smile as he invited him inside. The circles under his eyes were huge and even darker than before. As soon as the door closed, he pulled Ijin close to him and buried his face in his neck to take a huge breath.
“God, I missed you!” he groaned as he hugged the omega.
Ijin just hummed, enjoying their closeness. Seokju gently nuzzled Ijin’s neck, his soft lips brushed close against the omega’s scent glands, drawing a soft gasp from the boy. He felt his knees go weak, so he instinctively wrapped his arms around Seokju tighter, tilting his head to the side to give him more space. A fatal vulnerability, his mind reminded him, but Ijin didn’t care at all. He was with his alpha: safe and content.
With a needy sigh, Ijin closed his eyes, almost trembling from the overwhelming feeling of belonging. Seokju smelled fresh and crisp, like the air after a cleansing rain, with a hint of greenish tinge. Ijin was intimately familiar with nature, but he never had the right word to describe Seokju’s scent. It was… unique.
He breathed in the soothing pheromones as he rubbed his face against the other’s dark hair and face.
“Let’s go in!”
Ijin instinctively grabbed Seokju’s wrist to hold him back when the other tried to back away, an involuntary whimper slipping out of him before he could stifle it. He froze, his heart beating wildly with the unexpected longing to stay close, embraced by the comforting presence of the alpha.
Ijin blinked in surprise and stared at the hand gripping Seokju’s wrist.
His boyfriend said nothing, just leaned closer and kissed his forehead with a telling smile.
“You have to take off your shoes, remember? I’ll wait for you right here, I promise.” He murmured as he coaxed Ijin to let go of his wrist. “Come on, sweetheart, I made mattang for you, it’s waiting inside!”
Ijin’s stomach did a strange little flip, but he nodded and released the other. Seokju hummed and kissed his cheek once more, before backing away, but stopped at the threshold of the room. Ijin quickly took his shoes off, trailing after him.
It turns out that Seokju not only made mattang but also fried chicken and gimbap. He even prepared a huge batch of Ijin’s favorite fruits and snacks. The omega stared at the cluttered coffee table in amazement, his stomach growling, even though he hadn’t felt hungry just a moment ago.
Seokju hugged him from behind and placed both palms on Ijin’s stomach.
“Will it do, or do you want something different?”
“Are we celebrating something?”
“Hmm? Oh, umm, no, I just wanted to do something nice for you.” Seokju mumbled absentmindedly as he kissed Ijin’s nape. “Let’s dig in! Do you want to watch something or just cuddle and talk?”
“Cuddle.”
It wasn’t even a question for Ijin. Films and series weren’t really his thing, he never understood their appeal, though he watched some popular ones with Seokju. He wanted to know what his friends were talking about so passionately during recess.
Cuddling, however, quickly became one of his favorite things when it was just the two of them. It felt good to melt into Seokju’s embrace and let the other hold him close.
They huddled together on the huge sofa; their legs intertwined until Ijin was practically in Seokju’s lap. He leaned against the other boy’s shoulder and happily munched on the morsels that Seokju put in his mouth from the plate in their lap. Their scents were mingling, creating a shooting blanket as they talked about whatever came to mind: work, books, gaming, plans for the next week and their training schedule… At one point, Ijin started purring, licking the sugary syrup off Seokju’s fingertips, and humming happily. The alpha shuddered and pulled him closer with one arm, softly kissing his temple.
“Hm?” Ijin looked up, still munching on his piece of candied sweet potato.
Seokju stared back at him with awe and longing.
“Can I…?”
His free hand slid down timidly to touch Ijin’s belly through his shirt. Ijin smiled at him and nodded.
“Anytime” he replied, turning his head to kiss his boyfriend’s cheek.
Seokju grinned and immediately pulled Ijin’s shirt out of his pants to reach underneath. His touch was careful and feather-like, gently tracing along Ijin’s well-developed abs. The omega shivered and leaned back against his shoulder, enjoying his alpha’s touch. It was still amazing how gentle and careful Seokju was with him, even though he knew all too well that Ijin could take anything he threw at him. But still… He always remained kind and attentive, caressing Ijin like he was something priceless and fragile. It was… strange, but the best way ever.
Ijin purred again when Seokju’s palm came to rest on his belly, where their baby was nestled deep inside him. His stomach fluttered at the way Seokju’s scent changed, becoming fuller and layered with the warm scent of tangerine and honey.
“I can’t believe we’re already on the brink of the second trimester!”
Ijin hummed in agreement.
“I can’t wait to see them grow inside you.”
“The doctor said I would start showing soon. In a few weeks at most.” Ijin closed his eyes and enjoyed the way Seokju drew small circles on his skin with his fingertips. “I’ll have to stop attending training after next week. I’ll miss it” he added. Seokju’s hand paused for a moment before the boy resumed drawing the circles. “Dayeon offered to look into pregnancy yoga for me, but… I just can’t really picture myself in a yoga class with pregnant omegas.”
Ijin made a face that made Seokju giggle.
“Neither do I. Although I’m sure you’d look great in yoga pants. Stretching is also good for your health in general, it can help reduce muscle soreness and swelling in the third trimester, so the idea itself has many benefits. Some studies even suggest it can make labor easier, so it’s definitely worth looking into.”
Ijin smiled at the idea and Seokju’s casual info dumping.
“I’m still not convinced about the classes.”
“You can try it here. I’m sure we can find many tutorials online.”
“Will you do it with me?” Ijin asked with a teasing grin.
Seokju grinned back as his hand wandered lower. He ran his fingertips along the waistband of Ijin’s pants.
“I think I’ll just watch over you from the sofa and tell you if the pants are looking good enough.”
“Oh, I see.” Ijin shook his head with an amused chuckle. “Well, I love it when you watch over me, but I still not convinced. We should try it and see.”
“Definitely should.” Seokju’s fingers wandered back to Ijin’s stomach. “But if it’s not yoga… I’m sure we can find something else. Maybe you could continue running for now? We can set up a treadmill for you so you can do it whenever you want, and you don’t have to go out at night.”
There it was. Seokju’s unique way of worrying without trying to tell Ijin what to do or restrict him in any way. He offered solutions and easy compromises. Ijin smiled and ran her fingers over the back of Seokju’s hand, purring louder. He couldn’t believe how good it felt when his alpha made it clear that he cared about him. (Even if he was worrying unnecessarily. Ijin’s neighborhood wasn’t that dangerous.)
“I don’t think it will fit into Grandpa’s apartment and if I have to come over here that’s just beat the purpose.” Ijin wondered as he considered the offer. “But it’s a good idea, we definitely should see if we can somehow make room for it. I’d like to keep running if Doctor Han lets me.”
Seokju continued to draw small patterns to his skin but remained quiet for a long, long time. Ijin turned his head to take a closer look, afraid he might accidentally hurt the alpha even though Seokju’s scent didn’t change much. He looked away when their eyes met, avoiding Ijin’s gaze as a slight blush crept up his neck and ears. If anything, he seemed more shy than offended.
Ijin tilted his head to the side in confusion.
Seokju cleared his throat.
“What if you don’t have to come all the way here?” he asked. “I mean… I was already planning on moving out of my dad’s house, and not too long ago I saw that there was an apartment for sale in the building just two floors above Grandpa Yu’s, so… I don’t mean you have to move in with me, but maybe… I was planning on giving you a key so you could come over anytime, and there would be more than enough room for a treadmill, even if we set up a nursery…”
Seokju stopped suddenly and flashed him a bashful smile before taking a deep breath.
“Sorry, sorry, I’m rambling. I just… I didn’t know how to tell you, but I’m probably moving closer in a few weeks, so if you want to take a look around there and… you know, change anything so, maybe, you will be more comfortable to spend some time there with me.”
Ijin blinked in awe. His stomach made the same strange fluttering as before, and he felt his face burning. He was probably just as red as Seokju.
“Do you really want to move there? It’s very different from this neighborhood.”
It was an understatement. Their neighborhood was nice, but it was as far from the upscale part of town where Seokju grew up and lived as the mercenary village was from the Camp.
Seokju chucked and ran his fingers through Ijin’s hair, gently tugging at the silver-blonde locks.
“You live there.” He announced simply. “I want to be closer to you, and you want to stay close to your family, so this is the most convenient solution.”
“You could have just rented it first and see if it really works for you.”
“It was more practical to buy it. It will make it easier to make changes to suit our needs.”
“Sure.”
Ijin smiled at his boyfriend as he knelt up and cupped Seokju’s face in both of his palms, leaning close to kiss the alpha. His head felt unusually light, his instincts basking in the scent of his pheromones and the taste of his lips. Seokju hugged him and returned the kiss with eager desire. He even obediently tilted his head back to let Ijin nibble on his chin and throat when his lips moved lower.
“So… will you take a look?”
“I will.” Ijin agreed without thinking, pressing one last kiss to Seokju’s shoulder before sitting up properly. “Let’s go over later. You can show me around and tell me what you’ve planned for the nursery. After that… Can you stay and spend the night?”
“Of course.”
Neither of them mentioned how he remained in Seokju’s lap, straddling the other. Seokju placed his hands on Ijin’s waist, caressing the skin under his wrinkled shirt, and enjoying his small shivers. It was amazing how responsive Ijin was to every small, gentle touch.
“You won’t feel uncomfortable if I’m always around?” Seokju asked after a moment, looking intently at Ijin’s face. “I don’t want you to feel restricted or… under control.”
Ijin nodded even before Seokju could finish his explanation.
“I love it when you’re around, Seokju.” Ijin cupped his boyfriend’s face with a gentle smile. “I love being with you.”
He explicitly did not add that he knew Seokju could never restrict or control him. Not really. Maybe he tried to control their environment to make sure Ijin and the baby were safe, or took some (safety) measures for him without asking first… But this was a far cry from the real, restrictive control that Ijin was used to in camp.
“I’m not ready to move out and leave Grandpa and Dayeon behind, but that doesn’t mean I don’t like you around.”
“I know. I don’t want to compete with them or anything.” Seokju nodded. “But if I could provide you with a second place where you could feel safe and at home with the baby… I would really like that.”
“You could. And it’s true that grandpa’s apartment isn’t ideal, nor is it big enough for later when the baby arrives. I’m sure he’ll be relieved and grateful that you found us a place nearby with plenty of space.”
“I can get them both spare keys.”
Ijin nodded enthusiastically kissing his boyfriend again. How the hell could he have been so lucky to get him? Seokju was everything he had never dared to dream of since he was nine years old. He was sure the apartment would be perfect, meticulously inspected down to the smallest detail and selected with his comfort in mind. Seokju was exactly like that: sweet, attentive and reliable.
No wonder he looked so exhausted lately.
“Should we move this cuddling to a more comfortable place?” he initiated while kissing the tip of Seokju’s nose. “Maybe in your room...?”
Seokjin’s eyes lit up. He nodded enthusiastically and squeezed Ijin’s waist.
“Absolutely!”
Ijin smiled at him gently and stood up, taking Seokju’s hand to pull him along.