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The room was in complete chaos with pillows and clothes carelessly thrown to the sides. Seokju would say it looked like a battlefield, but with Ijin standing in the middle, the comparison seemed wrong. He spun around to stare at Seokju when he peaked into the room.
He looked as if he had just woken up after a really bad nap; disheveled and unusually emotional. His hair was damp and tousled, his oversized T-shirt hid his baby bump but slipped off his shoulder, revealing the curve of his neck and the dark kiss mark from their previous night. The most unsettling were his sparkling eyes. He watched Seokju with a predatory stillness that instinctively made the alpha tense, but at the same time, he looked incredibly dejected.
All in all, he was downright terrifying.
Seokju was torn between backing away and bolting or stepping up and pulling the distressed omega into his arms. Luckily, after only a few heartbeats of hesitation, his desire to comfort his boyfriend won over his survival instinct.
Ijin growled at him when he entered the room, but he didn’t attack even when Seokju cautiously reached out towards him. He let Seokju pull him into his arms, even hugged him back to snuggle close. His calming scent was bitter, filled with the smell of burned butter and a sickeningly harsh undertone that Seokju couldn’t name but wanted to chase away as soon as possible.
Seokju gently scented the distressed omega, rubbing his face against Ijin’s hair while stroking his tense back. The boy’s growl faltered as he leaned down and pressed his face against Seokju’s neck, nuzzling the alpha with a tired sigh and a barely noticeable shiver. Seokju ran his fingers through the messy, silver-blonde locks and began rubbing the back of Ijin’s head. He furtively looked around the room, searching for clues.
Ijin’s nest was in complete ruins, the carefully selected pillows and the clothes he had received as gifts from his family were all scattered. Even the mattress was pushed out of the nest, the thick curtains were framing only the emptied out alcove. Seokju stifled a groan.
He should have known it was about nesting again.
It started almost three weeks ago when Seokju finally moved into his new apartment.
The nesting alcove in the master bedroom was one of the reasons why he chose this apartment. The Yu’s family home, where only two betas had lived for a long time, had no suitable place for an omega to build a nest, so Seokju was happy to find a place that could provide Ijin with the comfort of a proper nest.
He never imagined it would be such a source of stress instead.
At first, Ijin only showed confusion and reluctance, nothing more. He inspected the alcove the first time but said nothing. Not even when Seokju hugged him from behind and casually mentioned how curious he was about what kind of nest Ijin would build and how he hoped Ijin would eventually invite him in. There was a slight hitch in his scent, but nothing more.
Seokju thought it was just shyness, maybe he just needed time to get used to the new apartment before starting his nest. All his research had told him that nesting was one of the most important instincts for omegas, and that they needed a place where they could feel completely safe, surrounded by every possible comfort. Especially during the second half of their pregnancy. So when they went to choose the furniture they needed for their new home, he tried his best to convince Ijin to choose one of the top-quality nesting mattresses, and he was very proud when he succeeded. Although the omega didn’t show much interest in the selection, he eventually pointed out one that he found convenient.
Then for almost two weeks, Ijin didn’t even look at the nesting alcove. Seokju waited with growing concern but only spoke up when Ijin decided to spend the night at his place for the first time.
“Are you sure it will be comfortable to sleep here?” he asked timidly after Ijin settled onto the king-sized bed in the master bedroom.
Ijin stared at him in confusion. He looked angelic as he sat on the bed in a pair of comfortable pants and an oversized T-shirt, hugging his small baby bump. Seokju wanted nothing more than to cuddle him all night, but he forced himself to point out their usual problem.
“I’d love to sleep beside you, it’s just… You know. Being hugged in your dream and such as. Will you be comfortable?”
Ijin looked around, considered the size of the bed, then shrugged.
“It’s big enough. I don’t want to sleep in the guest room, that would be no different than sleeping in Grandpa’s apartment, would it?”
Seokju nodded, then turned off the light and crawled into bed next to Ijin.
“I guess if it doesn’t work out, we can get you some nesting pillows for next time so you can sleep in your nest.”
He didn’t want it to sound like a question, but it was, and they both felt it. Ijin was silent for a long time, not even humming a response. At last, Seokju turned to his side worriedly.
“Ijin…?”
“I don’t know how.”
“What?”
“I have no idea how to build a nest.” Ijin blurted out, turning toward Seokju. He frowned in the dim light and stared at him. “I read everything you sent, even watched the videos, but I still have no idea how to start. It seems so pointless, I feel safe with you even without a nest, but… Every time I look at that place, my instincts tell me to build one.” He gestured behind himself at the alcove. “I just don’t know how to do it. It’s frustrating.”
Seokju stared at his sulking boyfriend (because it was definitely sulking and God help him, Ijin was adorable), and not even the faint scent of burnt butter could stop him from giggling. He reached out to take his boyfriend’s hand.
“You are overthinking it too much.” he comforted the distressed omega. “A nest is just a place that is completely yours and where you can feel comfortable, loved, and safe. It doesn’t need to follow any specific rules, it just needs to be yours. Your safe place. If you want a single scented pillow, nothing more, it’s as perfect as any elaborate nest.”
He waited patiently while Ijin frowned and considered the thought. When he finally nodded, Seokju smiled at him and gently squeezed his hand.
“If it helps, we can choose the materials together.”
Ijin sent him a small, grateful smile. He still seemed unsure, but the note of distress was slowly fading from his scent.
“Thanks, Seokju.”
That was over a week ago, and since then, Seokju deeply regretted thinking that the root of the problem was just Ijin’s inexperience and that it would resolve itself once he gave him the necessary push to start.
“Can you tell me what happened?” he asked softly, although he already guessed the answer.
The omega responded by hugging Seokju even tighter and mumbling something under his breath that he couldn’t catch.
“Love?”
“It doesn’t feel right at all. It’s not safe enough!” Ijin snapped, pressing his face into the crook of Seokju’s neck. “It smells like you and Grandpa and Dayeon, and I like it, I really do! But at the same time… I don’t. I feel so uneasy and conflicted and… out of place.”
Seokju sighed silently, his heart sinking.
“I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”
He was stuck without a solution. Ijin had been restless before, sure, ever since entering his second trimester he often acted strangely and on edge. He was clearly confused by the empty nest, not knowing what to do with it, but until last week he had been able to relax and ignore the alcove with his unique detachment. But after Seokju prompted him to start his nest, things got completely out of hand. Ijin’s instincts took over and drove him crazy.
He could no longer rest comfortably or sleep for more than a few stolen hours here and there, and as he grew more exhausted, he also became more tense. Seokju found him crouched against the bedroom wall more than once, near his unfinished nest, observing his surroundings with deathly stillness. He even growled at Seokju when the alpha carelessly entered the room he was in. He quickly calmed down after he caught Seokju’s scent, but still… It was terrifying.
Especially when it happened in the kitchen, with one of their knives in his hand. It was just a butter knife, but it was a sight that Seokju was sure he would never forget.
Seokju tried everything he could think of, even reaching out to a specialist who worked with traumatized omegas and consulted her about the issue through emails. She encouraged him to seek professional help for Ijin in the long run, and until then, find something (a place, a scent, or a texture, whatever) that would make him feel completely relaxed and, if possible, protected. So Seokju went and asked Grandpa Yu and Dayeon for some of their clothes.
Judging by the condition of the nest, it didn’t work out too well.
Ijin took a deep breath, then pulled away and looked around miserably.
“My instincts are all over the place” he admitted, and for the first time ever, he looked defeated. “They tell me to be careful because I’m not safe, but I know I am and I just… I don’t know what to do with them! I wasn’t this tired since… back then.”
Seokju listened to Ijin’s rambling with bated breath. It felt wrong to poke around for information when his boyfriend was this tired and dazed, but maybe this held the answer they needed. Right?
“Back when?” He asked carefully.
“In the Camp. Before… Before the numbers.” Ijin replied after a moment’s pause. He leaned in and snuggled Seokju once again. “I was always so alone and tired back then.”
“But your team helped.”
“Uhm. They trained me. Kept me alive.”
Seokju closed his eyes for a moment and stifled a groan. Oh, of course it had to be them! Those crazy, overprotective bastards… Yeah, he saw it now, clear as day. Hell with it.
“How about we try to add a few more scents into your nest?” Ijin gave him a drowsy, questioning hum. “I’ll take care of it, don’t worry. I think I just figured out whose scent will make you feel absolutely protected.”
Even if he didn’t really like the implication, or the involvement of those bastards.
~*~*~*~
They had another clash with 003, ending with yet another stalemate. At least they were able to avoid serious injuries while the other side probably lost a few soldiers. Sure, most of them had bruises, 018 had a mild concussion, and 004 a fresh bullet wound on his thigh, but that was it. Nothing serious or life-threatening. The most annoying matter was the huge waste of bullets, but as things stand, it was a victory, even though 002 would have preferred if they had managed to kill 003.
He assessed their losses while 008 bandaged up the grumbling 004. 018 was sitting in their run-down armchairs, resting with a big mug of lemonade in hand that 008 had given him to hydrate.
It was just a normal Saturday after another close call.
002 ignored 004’s yapping as he finished updating their supply log. They needed more ammunition for the semi-automatic rifles, and their medical supplies soon needed a refill, but otherwise their losses were manageable. After he finished, he routinely checked the time as well, but it was still early, barely two o’clock in Korea. There was no fresh report from 016 and 032.
005 and 006 were still out on their commission and had not requested backup either.
Ever since 001 announced his pregnancy, this has become their new lineup. 005 and 006 joined them on more assignments to stabilize their cash flow, while 032 stayed in Korea (usually accompanied by at least one other number) in a modest, not-so-legally rented apartment. It was a few cities away from 001; a safe distance for two to three people to remain hidden but still close enough to be on hand and provide back-up in case of an emergency. It was tricky to set up and had its own risks, but the thought of leaving 001 without proper protection made them all uneasy. Even if some of them weren’t keen to admit it.
The kid-alpha chosen by 001 was alright, but not trained enough for 002’s taste. He had a stable and respectable upbringing in a much better environment than either of them, and luckily, he was also loyal and quick-witted when faced with a tight situation. But his survival- and fighting skills were too lacking to effectively protect 001.
Their investigation didn’t dig up any dirt about him or his family either. His mother was an average office worker, and his father was the secretary and bodyguard of some big-shot businessman who also seemed to have connections to 001. For now, they had SW on their radar just to be sure, but other than that, 002 decided to let things play out.
He looked down when his burner phone started ringing and as if the universe sensed the path of his wandering thoughts: a previously unseen but instantly recognized codename appeared on the screen.
He immediately answered the call.
“Talk.” he ordered, briefly and coldly.
He felt the others perk up behind him. There were a soft huff and some muttering on the other end of the line, but it was too faint for 002 to get it.
“I need your help.” The kid sounded normal, a little reluctant at most. Was he held at gunpoint? There was no other noise in the background that could have indicated his location or situation. “It’s just a simple favor, nothing big, so don’t make a fuss.”
“What do you need?”
002 decided to play along as he fired up his computer to pull up 032’s latest report. Maybe there was something they dismissed as normal last time, but could be useful clue now...
“Clothes.”
002 stopped. His hand hovered over the computer as he frowned. He felt the others moving closer, like a pack of wolves about to pounce.
“Clothes” he repeated doubtfully.
“Yes. Something that smells strongly like you and your team. Anything made of scent-retaining material would be best, but for now we’ll make do with whatever you have on hand and can do without” the kid sighed wearily on the other end of the line. 002 could picture him rubbing his temple with the phone pressed to his ear. “Ijin is nesting and anxious, and I need something that makes him feel as safe as possible to calm him down. Right now, it seems like your scent is the only thing that can, hopefully, do that, so… Could you send me something? Preferably as soon as possible.”
“I…” 002 felt strangely off balance, his chest tightening from an unusual weight. He gulped and took a deep breath. “Yes. We will arrange the delivery. I will inform you of the time and place.”
The kid sighed in relief.
“Thanks.”
That was it, the next moment the line was cut without any ceremony.
002 stood still for a few precious, long moments, his thoughts racing as he mentally cursed Mad Dog, not for the first time. Nesting? What the hell does that mean? He had to realize once again that he knew almost nothing about omegas. And 001 wanted their scent for comfort? It was the most surreal thing imaginable, and 002 felt completely unprepared to cope with it. They didn’t even have scent half the time, especially since they got their numbers. Their missions required stealth and they had to be untraceable, not to mention the extremely unpleasant fact that their scent could easily give away their hidden injuries or inner thoughts. They had regularly used scent blockers, even back in their training days.
“What did he want?”
002 cleared his throat and turned around to look at his team. They all looked at him with worried readiness. 004 waited for his answer with a deep frown and crossed arms, clearly favoring his uninjured leg, but otherwise looking as if he was ready to rush to Korea.
“He asked for some of our clothes.” 002 chose his words carefully. The other numbers stared at him in confusion. “001 is building a nest and his instincts are out of control. The kid thinks he needs our scent to calm down and feel safe.”
That left 004 speechless, which had almost never happened before. He stared at 002 with wide eyes and a gaping mouth. On the other hand, 008’s face softened, his worried frown melting into a bashful smile. 018 just looked confused.
“But... we barely have any scent.”
002 nodded solemnly.
“Does this idiot think there are scented clothes just lying around here?!” 004 barked, finally finding his voice again, his face red, but not like usually. 002 could have sworn his second-in-command blushed. “And what the hell is nesting?”
“It’s something omegas do for comfort.” 008 jumped in. “They are said to build nests for themselves out of soft things like pillows and blankets, then fill them with the scent of people they feel comfortable with.” 008’s explanation caught all their attention, causing the large man to cough into his fist. “Or so I read.”
002 nodded. It sounded plausible and consistent with what little 001’s alpha had told him, even if it still didn’t make any sense. It was hard to picture 001 curled up in a nest made of soft things and clothes. Their clothes. Looking at the others, they probably felt the same, fidgeting and looking away in discomfort or (in case of 004) yapping enraged about stupid, fussy omega wusses.
002 deliberately ignored the strange feeling that had been nestling in his chest ever since Seokju’s demand had taken him completely by surprise and got heavier after the explanation. It was a warm but somehow uncomfortable feeling.
“Gather everything that has your scent on it.” he commanded, overcoming the momentary inconvenience. “Let’s see what we can send over to 016 to deliver.”
The others looked at him bewildered.
“Um… Are you sure it’s safe?” 008 asked softly, scratching his chin. “It’s our scent after all…”
“Safe enough.” 002 answered with a curt nod. “I doubt anyone knows our scent well enough to recognize it on 001, especially if it’s mixed with his family’s. We use blockers during missions, and most of us are betas with mild scent to begin with.”
“I bet not even the little wuss knows our scent.” 004 added. “What a load of shit.”
“Omegas have very sharp noses and are better at picking up on scents and mood swings.”
“S-shut up!”
002 glanced at his team as he considered 008’s explanation. They all probably should have made a bigger effort to learn more about omegas, like 008 did.
“008, send me everything you have about omegas.” he ordered, interrupting the quarrel of his comrades. 008 nodded. “Let’s get to work!”
~*~*~*~
Thanks.
That was it, a one-word message three days later, just two hours after 016 reported the delivery of the stuffed duffel bag they sent over. (They had collected far more clothes than 002 thought possible, and if they had decided not to wear their scent blockers for the day after Seokju’s call to have more scented clothes at hand... neither of them had brought up the subject.)
002 stared at the message and wondered for a few minutes whether to respond before giving in to his instincts.
Did it help?
He knew he would deny for the rest of his life that he had waited with bated breath for the full five minutes for the next message to arrive.
It did he read in the pop-up preview. He is finally sleeping.
His eyes widened when he saw that a picture was attached too. He felt a strange heaviness in his stomach as his finger hovered over the pop-up window, hesitating and his hands shaking slightly. He needed a moment to calm down before he dared to properly open the message. There it was: the picture of 001 curled up behind a half-drawn curtain, sleeping peacefully among carefully placed cream-colored pillows and a ring of their clothes.
002 stared at the picture, and if he smiled faintly at it… Well, no one was present to notice.