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There was a heavy layer of smoke hanging in the air as he entered the bar. The room was filled with soft music and even softer conversations. The bar had a few patrons sitting at it, couples scattered throughout the rest of the room. There was the occasional single demon sitting at a table, looking to find a cure to something at the bottom of their glass. Even if that cure was just to forget. A group of younger demons gathered around the pool table, laughing loudly at shared jokes.
It was not the type of establishment he would frequent, if he ever frequented bars. That, however, was the appeal, wasn’t it?
No one here knew him. No one here should recognize him. Here, he was anonymous.
He sashayed up to the bar, and in a false falsetto, he ordered a glass of white wine. He needed to relax. The tension in his voice would surely give him away.
“No problem. Do you want to start a tab, ma’am?”
Andrealphus fluttered his eyelashes and responded with a simple. “That would be wonderful, Darling, thank you.”
He caught a look of himself in the mirror behind the bar, and smiled approvingly. The dress he wore was a silky, icy blue flowing down to his mid-thigh. His makeup matched, and he had placed snowflake clips in his silvery blond wig. Today, he felt that he looked like the epitome of an ice queen. He looked perfect.
The satisfaction did not last, though. Memories from earlier that evening crept into his mind. Vassago had returned from a fundraiser for orphaned Hellhounds. He was lamenting the poor living conditions of these children and how they were not given ‘proper opportunities to better themselves’.
Andrealphus had pointed out that they were only Hellhounds, and it didn’t make sense to concern oneself with such trivial matters. Somehow that conversation had escalated into an argument about many different things, including Andrealphus accusing Vassago of always trying to change him.
Andrealphus remembered the look on Vassago's face after the words had escaped him. He looked as if Andrealphus had smacked him across the face. The shock and hurt in his eyes cut like a knife.
He should have apologized; he should have taken it all back. Unfortunately, Andrealphus had been in a white rage. Instead of apologizing, he had calmly declared, “I think we are through.” And he walked out of Vassago’s home.
A part of him was screaming at himself, ‘Go back, you idiot! He is the best thing that has ever happened to you.’ While the other part yelled back, ‘If he cared, he would have come after you! You are better off without him.
Andrealphus unclasped his blue clutch, admiring how it matched his dress perfectly as he pulled out his phone
Not one single message from Vassago.
His heart sank. After he’d left, in an effort to make himself feel better, he had done something he hadn’t done since he started dating Vassago: he put on a dress and went out for a fun night.
He used to do this from time to time, though he’d die if anyone ever knew of it. He liked the way it made him feel. Beautiful, soft, and yet at the same time, strong and powerful in a different way. It was not that he desired to be a woman; he simply liked the way he looked in a dress. And what was wrong with that?
He heard a man approach and sit next to him. “Hey, can I buy you a drink, little Darling?”
Andrealphus gave him a sideways glance, skewering the man with his face alone. He wasn’t really sure what he was looking for from this night, but this scruffy man was not it.
“I have a drink.” Andrealphus swirled his glass for emphasis.
Not taking the hint, the man tried to start a conversation with the bird, who decided to simply ignore him. But the fool kept on talking and talking, and his voice was annoying Andrealphus. The only reprieve came when someone opened the bar door, and the sirens from outside grew temporarily loud enough to drown the man out. It was still about 5 more minutes before he finally took the hint and left.
The stool next to him only remained unoccupied temporarily before a new patron sat down next to him. “You know, Una flor preciosa, like yourself, should not be at a bar like this. Especially alone.”
Andrealphus felt his breath catch in his chest and his heart start to pound. Slowly, he lifted his eyes to the mirror to try and confirm his suspicions. Next to him sat Vassago, of all people.
What was he doing here? Andrealphus couldn’t risk being discovered, especially not by Vassago.
He was already planning his exit strategy when Vassago started speaking. “Mi Corazón, he no longer wants me. What is a man to do when his heart leaves?”
Andrealphus froze. Had Vassago truly not recognized him? He turned slowly in his seat. “I honestly do not know,” he squeaked out in his falsetto, relieved that it had finally settled into a more natural tone.
Vassago shrugged. “He thinks he can not be himself around me.”
For the first time, Vassago looked directly at Andrealphus. He held out his hand and simply said, “Vassago.”
Andrealphus placed his hand gently into his boyfriend’s—could he still call him that?—hand. “Andrea,” he responded.
Fear gripped his heart. Was the usual name he used too close to his actual name?
“Very nice to meet you, Andrea,” Vassago cooed back. “Do you mind a bit of company? I could really use a sympathetic ear.”
This was a golden opportunity, wasn’t it? He could let Vassago pour his heart out to Andrea and then use that information to fix things. A small voice in the back of his mind whispered that it was not an okay thing to do, that he was abusing the trust of his soft, naive boyfriend.
Andrealphus was also fairly certain that voice had never existed before Vassago.
He pushed the voice further back and ignored it. “I am always happy to listen.” He looked back at the bartender and waved his glass to indicate he wanted another one.
When the bartender delivered the wine, Vassago informed him, “Sex on the beach sounds lovely tonight, doesn’t it?"
Andrealphus nearly choked on his sip of wine. He realized, of course, that Vassago had meant the drink. His mind, however, went to a completely different scenario.
It would not be a good idea to start day dreaming about sex with Vassago. He needed to try and fix things first. If there was a way to fix them.
“Mira, there is a table over there.” Vassago pointed. “Let us move the conversation over there, yeah?”
They wound up talking for a very long time. Vassago did most of the talking, actually. About a lot of unimportant things. When suddenly, Vassago declared sullenly, “My boyfriend is a piece of work.”
Andrealphus' head popped up. “Excuse me?”
“He is.” Vassago shrugged. “He manipulates and uses people. He acts as though he only cares about himself. He has no scruples. He is the kind of person that will smile nicely in your face while stabbing you in the back.”
So much for trying to fix things. Vassago obviously thought very little of him. “Sounds like you are better off.” Andrealphus tried to keep the hurt and anger from his tone.
“Oh, I know so many people who would agree with you.” Vassago reached out and took Andrealphus’ hands.
“Those people, though,” He leaned in, as if to share secrets with a best friend, “don’t know what I know,” he whispered.
A lump was forming in his throat. He struggled to get his words to push past it. “What is that?”
“It isn’t really who he is.” Vassago squeezed Andrealphus’ hands. “He puts on a facade to hide behind. Yes, he can be manipulative and seemingly self-centered, but that is because he is driven. Life has not been as kind to him as it should have been. He has had to prove himself every day since childhood.”
He leaned back, never letting go of Andrealphus’ hands. His thumbs started to draw small circles on the back of them, across his knuckles. Was Vassago hitting on him? That couldn’t be right. Vassago was gay. He wouldn’t hit on someone he thought was a woman, would he? And Andrealphus was certain he made a very convincing woman.
“Dance with me,” Vassago said suddenly, standing up. Andrealphus, who always struggled to tell the parrot no, followed him to the little makeshift dance floor which consisted of peeling linoleum and chipped paint lines.
Vassago drew Andrealphus close and rested his cheek on the bird’s. The closeness triggered an extraordinarily strong reaction in him. His breathing quickened, and his heart began to pound heavily in his chest. He feared even his palms were getting sweaty. Vassago, however, seemed to be completely oblivious to all of this.
“You are very beautiful. The dress suits you very well.”
Andrealphus blushed, before he remembered this should not make him happy. Vassago thought he was Andrea after all.
“You are also a very good listener.” Vassago nuzzled a bit closer, causing a shiver to run through Andrealphus’ spine. The sensation was extremely pleasurable.
“You have a very passionate heart, and I know you would fight with all you have for the ones you love. It is a very admirable trait. It is one of many reasons I really like you.”
Andrealphus couldn’t take it anymore. He pushed away. “I need to go.”
As Andrealphus tried to pass him, the parrot grabbed his wrist, forcing the peacock to stop. Vassago approached him from behind. Continuing to hold on to his wrist with one hand, Vassago encircled Andrealphus’ waist with his other arm. He whispered into the bird’s ear, “I would like for you to please come home with me.”
Tears were starting to sting at Andrealphus’ eyes. How could Vassago be so willing to bring someone else home? They had only fought a few hours ago. Did he mean so little to him?
“I don’t know if that is such a good idea,” Andrealphus started to protest.
Vassago’s beak was now right against Andrealphus’ ear. “Why?”
“It just isn’t.”
“Are you worried I will judge the dress? Or that we are too different? What is it, mi amor?”
Andrealphus’ mind was racing. Vassago had released his wrist and was now gently stroking his arm, which was making it very difficult to think. He wanted nothing more than to return home with Vassago. But that wasn’t what Vassago was asking, now was it?
There was a chuckle. “Please, tell me.”
“You have no idea who I am. You wouldn’t want me if you did.” Andrealphus could barely get the words out.
A soft chuckle sounded behind his ear. “Do you take me for a tonto? Do you think a dress and wig can trick me? You think I did not spot you the moment I walked in here? I know who you are, Andy. I know you better than anyone, and I want you to come back home with me.”
Andrealphus swung around. “You know?” he gasped.
“Mi amor, of course I know it is you. I will always know you.” He then tilted his head ever so slightly. “Why did you feel you needed to hide this part of yourself from me?”
“I thought… you would, maybe, somehow think less of me,” Andrealphus admitted, hanging his head.
Vassago gently lifted Andrealphus’ chin so their eyes could meet. “Mira, look at my clothes. Do you really think I would judge someone for expressing their more feminine side? No,” he stepped back. “In fact, I think you look beautiful.”
He pulled Andrealphus closer. “I would never judge you on what you wear, nor do I wish for you to change that about yourself. Has your privileged lifestyle blinded you to the realities of Hell? Si. It drives me loca, and I hope with time you'll see things differently. I am not willing to give up on you when I've already seen you start to grow and change and learn.
“Really? You still want me after tonight?” Part of Andrealphus was trying to convince him this must have been a trick of some kind.
Andrealphus suddenly found himself in a tight embrace. “Sí, mi amor. I still want you. Please, come home.”
Andrealphus felt the tears running down his cheeks and soaking into Vassago’s shirt. He felt immensely relieved. Vassago had somehow managed to become the most important person in his life. The idea of losing him had been devastating.
“Yes,” he breathed into Vassago’s chest. “Let us go home.”
Vassago released him from the embrace but continued to hold his hand. He gently brushed away the tears still on Andrealphus’ cheeks and then paid both their tabs for the night. He smiled softly at his Snowbird and then led him out the door. Once on the street, he opened a portal. “I really do like the dress, mi amor. But I am also quite looking forward to taking it off of you. Come on.”
With giggles, they both entered the portal to their bedroom.