Chapter Text
Ch. 1
The usual hangout with a touch of second hand embarrassment on the side
Billy hated mornings. They were a disgrace to mankind- and if it was up to him, morning wouldn’t officially start till 11am. Eugh. Mornings. Morning people were a disgrace to mankind too. Probably.
Was some old, old important guy a morning person? Was that why he had to just suck it up and get up every dawn?
Atlas, here he was. Wide awake and slowly building up the mood for the day. It was the 13th of July. A Monday. Ew. Again, a disgrace. Monday’s were like, basically the mornings of the world.
But, it was summer, so it wasn’t all too bad. Like how his mother would let him tune to his station every morning to pump himself up. Or how he could make himself the shittiest, best breakfasts in the world while his mother cramped up the bathroom. They had learned to set up a flip-flop kinda schedule, so basically, whenever Billy was in the kitchen, she was in the bathroom, and then they’d switch. It kept things peaceful, or else Billy would go back to sleep and declare the world simply couldn’t handle him that day.. and miss delivering the paper…
Sorry not sorry?
Anywayy- back to his wonderful, amazing, gorgeous breakfasts that the president would give him an award for if he saw him every morning.. even if Billy’s mom disapproved. She just didn’t have to look at him making them, no biggie!
Today was special to the special land of breakfast. Again, Monday was the worst, soo he always made something extra yummy to make up for it.
Billy had a piece of toast, and spread some bright, vibrant superman ice cream onto it with his spoon. It was extra delish, in Billy’s humble opinion.
Actually, not so humble. It was the best breakfast he’d ever thought of ever in the history of ever. There was nothing better. Like, maybe except for Jerry Orbach… Or Harper- his best friend in the entire world.
Y’know what they say. Dog is a man’s best friend! Or.. something like that. Shshhsh it was too early to figure that out.
It was 10:47am.
..still way too early. It had cut into Billy’s beauty sleep. Billy hated that.
Billy took a big bite of his super-toast, very happy with himself. It was crunchy and sweet. Couldn’t get any better breakfast than that.. unless it was actually dinner and he got to sleep in till four pm… oh the dreamm…
“Billy, do you know where my-” Billy paused as his mom walked in, both of them freezing like someone physically stopped time for a few seconds. It didn’t help that Billy was mid-bite, looking up like he was caught with his hand in the cookie jar or something.
Did people actually have cookie jars? They just kinda stuck theirs in a zipblock bag and prayed they wouldn’t smear too much chocolate against the plastic walls. Eugh- those were awful to dig your hand through. They always smeared, and-
“Billy! What did I say about ice cream for breakfast?” Mom asked, but she looked more confused than upset- thankfully. They teased, but mom was terrifying when she got really mad.
“I’’s a ph’oo’fer-fo’us’.” Billy explained, speaking with his mouth full. He grinned. She could figure it out. Probably.
Probably.
Mom did an amused eyebrow raise. “Finish chewing before you speak. I can’t understand you like that.”
Billy chewed for a few seconds. It was annoying how long it took- it felt like forever. Why couldn’t humans like, evolve a little more to figure that out?
Billy finally swallowed, grinning soon after. Like, immediately after. “It’s a super-toast.”
“Right.. of course it is.” She said it teasingly, going to rummage through the cupboards for cereal like a normal person.
Billy speedwalked over to the hallway, sliding towards the bathroom. He.. uh.. very, very ‘smoothly’ avoided going straight into the door, already reaching for all the things he needed for the day. Like his watermelon flavored toothbrush. Don’t ask, man. The fibers tasted good.
He had a hang out with Bruce today. Which was so, so fun. Not like, sarcastically or anything. Did that sound sarcastic? Well- it wasn’t. Billy loved hanging out with Bruce- the two didn’t really match energies per say, but they seemed to understand whatever the other was thinking and both easily went off of that.
So, yeah. Hanging out with the boy was amazing. Bruce was always hanging out with his other friends or doing his weird baseball practice shit- why was ‘cheese’ a term there? What did cheese have to do with hitting a bat?- so getting time to enjoy each other's company was like winning the lottery. Then again, Bruce waved, nodded, and side-hugged him so many times at school Billy couldn’t be too mad at it..
He had to hurry though. Bruce had said he was gonna arrive at 11:03am, and Bruce was freakishly right at that shit. Down to the dot. It kinda freaked him out sometimes. In like, friendly, cool way. Y’know how it is.
(Oh, and Billy had totally slid straight into that door by the way.)
—
11:00….
Billy could wait. Surely. He just didn’t let his eyes break from the oven clock.
11:01…
This was painful. Billy was totally gonna like.. die from waiting too long.
11:02…..
That was a thing, wasn’t it? Death of waiting too long?
11-
There was a knock on the door.
A knock.
On his door.
Bruce was here.
..
AGAGAHSGAGGAGA-
Billy had run to the door so fast- in his socks, which in hindsight was an awful idea- he slammed into the door. Again. This time though, he grabbed onto the door handle and pressed himself against the wall. Which turned out to be a good idea, since all he did was awkwardly wobble as he did a half squat half wall sit for a few seconds.
Billy had never been so grateful for the fact that he had a door between the glass door and the inside of his house. The idea of Bruce Yamada seeing Billy make a foolery of himself made him physically cringe. That would’ve been.. so, so painful. Mentally, not physically.
Though maybe the painful noise that shot out when Billy basically launched himself against the door didn’t help him hide that fact.
Oh well.
Billy swung the door open, trying to act cool even if he was panting a little still. “Uahhuh.. Hey!”
Bruce Yamada was blinking, eyes wide. His hand was raised, like he had just been about to knock again. He just stared for a few minutes, before a smile broke out and he put down his hand. “Hey Billy. You okay? I uh- I heard a bang over here.. if that just.. happened to be you?” He sounded very amused.
Billy immediately panicked. “Oh, yeah. That was just uh..” Fuck. Lie. What was a good lie? “My pet goldfish. He gets a little rowdy sometimes.” No- that was too fucking stretched of a lie, Billy’s never even seen a real life goldfish- where’d he even think of-? Focus. You look like a dumbass right now. Fix it.
“I- I mean, it was just my shoe.. I threw it. Against the wall. It was a very reasonable reaction, you see. Given.. the very real circumstances.” Auhh.. he totally worked that. Yeah.
Probably.
Not really.
No. Stay semi-confident. That was like, the first rule of improv. Wait. No. That was ‘yes, and’ wasn’t it-?
Bruce interrupted his monologue with a laugh bubbling up, rubbing the back of his head with his hand. “It’s- it’s fine, man. I’m just glad you’re okay.” He smiled, all sweet as usual. The boy paused, thinking, before snorting. “And I hope your very real pet goldfish is okay too.” He joked, obviously finding Billy’s.. very, very real story amusing.
Billy felt his face flush slightly, but he attempted to play it off. “He is very real. His name is Jacob, and he’s very dear to me. Do not laugh at his misery.” Billy half joked, stepping outside.
Bruce nodded, taking a few steps back to give Billy some room, before acting like that excuse was perfectly reasonable. “Sure, Billy. I won’t laugh at him, I promise.”
“Good.” Billy took a small, awkward breath, before going back to normal. Quite literally- he made a great show of it by jumping up. They were slowly walking away from Billy’s pavement and onto the road.
“I’m so hyped! Agahagghsmr! We haven’t hung out in forever.” Billy complained, trudding closer to where Bruce was walking. Bruce seemed just as happy, which made Billy happy. It was hella awkward being the only happy one in a scene. Billy could tell you that for sure.
“I know.. it’s just with Baseball, and my extra summer classes.. all that.” Bruce smiled, nudging Billy’s shoulder playfully. Bruce wasn’t technically in summer school. He was willingly in virtual classes over summer break to ‘get ahead’. It was the most boring plan Billy’s ever heard.
“Ya ya ya.. Yamada’s got unnecessary shit over here. Except maybe baseball. Baseball can be fun.” Billy teased, retracking just slightly. It made Bruce roll his eyes.
“Yeah, sure. And you being the paperboy is any better?”
“Woah there-! Being a Paperboy is very important, man. Y’know why?” Billy grinned, feeling a pep grow in his step the more he walked with Bruce.
“Why?” Bruce asked, letting Billy have his moment even if he knew what was coming along.
“Cha-ching!” Billy made the money sound, rubbing his thumb and fingers together, giggling. “The moneyyy..The moolah, the cheddar…all the things!”
“Money is fun.” Bruce nodded, smiling as they got to the end of the lawn. “Do you think-”
BEEP BEEEP!
Well. Billy’s already about 83% sure who that was. He turned his head, not even really surprised to see a light pink toy jeep speeding down the neighbourhood street. It had purple accents, and weirdly, also a disney princesses sticker plastered onto the front.
A boy was driving it, a boy who had brownish-blondish hair, a soft face, and.. Billy couldn’t tell what he was wearing when he was all squeezed into the ‘jeep’. The dude had to be at least 12. Maybe 13.
Billy watched as he somehow managed to do a wheelie on that thing, taking a sharp turn down the street and away from Billy’s house.
Billy knew absolutely shit about the kid. He had no clue. He honestly wasn’t even sure the boy lived in this neighbourhood. Nobody saw him do anything else besides drive around the neighbourhood in weird childish vehicles. Billy got it, but the dude could’ve at least said hi or something. It started out with just golf carts and a bike or two, but the boy hadn’t repeated a vehicle once in the span of four months.. which led to more and more random kid-toys rolling down the street. It was crazy insane. Honestly, Billy just wanted to know how he got all those. Also, where the fuck did he keep them? In a shoe box?
“Do you think that kid’ll ever actually talk to somebody in town?” Bruce asked, finally turning to Billy, curious. Bruce always wanted to make new and even newer friends.
“Maybe.” Billy shrugged, before snorting. “I think he’d have to be forced to do it. Like.. run outta things with wheels.. or gas. I’ve seen him drive electric shit around.” Billy joked, snickering.
“Maybe.” Bruce smiled, amused. “Anyway. Come on- I wanted to show you the gas station they made nearby.”
“Oh-! They finished that?” They were a pretty far away neighbourhood. It made Billy feel giddy- he loved being able to walk places.
“Yeah.” Bruce smiled, dragging Billy away.
—
“Dudee... Why would we both walk all the way here.. and then remember neither of us have wallets on us?”
“I’dunno, actually. We could go look for change?”
“Just.. spare change? Bruce, I love you, but genuinely when is there ever enough change on the floor to supply two people’s drinks?”
“We could share? I mean.. the grocery store has a lot. My sister’s picked up like.. four whole dollars worth.”
“...”
“...”
The two of them ended up buying one soda and two lollipops with a quarter and three dimes.
—
Billy was wandering around the town after dark, as one does. Because he’s just cool and mysterious like that.
..
He was actually awkwardly close to genuinely shitting himself. Billy had trust issues with the outside world once the sun came down, like most people should feel. He’s seen enough creepiness in the newspaper; it was a miracle he still went outside at all. He should become a hermit crab. Those things do the whole turtle hiding thing, right? Or just.. hide? Something like that. Billy knew absolutely nothing about animals other than dogs go bark and cats go meow.
He was walking by some skatepark, at least. That was entertaining. Billy only felt bad when he giggled for way too long to be subtle when some kid ate the asphalt.
Oops.
Still. The vibes were groovy as fuck.
Billy got a little wrapped up in watching the skaters to the point where he wasn’t looking at where he was walking anymore.
You see, for the average folk, that would be no biggie. But this was Billy, and, well.. he’s not exactly known for his coordination.
Maybe Billy should’ve realised what was happening when some boy tried to get his attention. Or when his foot landed under a still skateboard. Maybe he should’ve decidedly not taken an attempt to take a massive step forward after noticing his foot was stuck.
THWAMP!
…Billy didn’t really feel the pain of slamming face first into the ground immediately. His first thought was really just considering that maybe karma really was a thing. And the second one was a very specific kind of embarrassment for himself that it felt equivalent to second-hand level embarrassment. Like when couples in movies got weirdly awkward and so embarrassing you wanted to crawl at your skin.
Billy just laid there, planning on wallowing in his awful, awful mistakes in life. He didn’t care too much about whose skateboard he was still half on top of.
He did hear footsteps leading up till they were beside Billy’s head. Yes- marvel at the absolute embarrassment that was Billy Showalter. Sigh..
“You good?” The boy asked, sounding only half interested in his safety.
Billy glanced up, just to see who the world had decided was the viewer of all Billy’s current predicament. It was some long haired kid- with a bandana around his head. He had actually skating protection on.
Billy considered his surroundings, and turned so his head was shoved back in the ground.
“I’m wounded..” He complained, pouring in all his very valid sadness into his words. “Emotionally. I’ll never recover from this fall.. Oh, let the world forgive the absolute tomfoolery that is the.. uh.. world of Billy Showalter. Sigh..” Billy actually said sigh, acting like he was mourning.
“Uh.” The dude didn’t really respond immediately, and Billy could feel his slight judgment. Billy didn’t give a fuck- he was dying, leave him be. “Right. Cool. Can you maybe get off my board now?”
Billy considered that. It would be the nice thing to do, to get up and get off of this dude’s skateboard.
“No. I am busy with my sufferage. I will never live this down..” Billy exclaimed, dramatically flaring out his arms like a dying woman in a 1800s painting.
“....it’s really not that big of a deal, man. People fall all the time. But you are like, hogging my skateboard, so.. if you could just mourn a little to the left, that’d be great.” The boy deadpanned, sounding a little awkward, like he didn’t know what to do in this situation.
Billy flopped over, squealing slightly when the skateboard started rolling closer to the edge- where it dropped into the area where they did tricks and other random things Billy didn’t care about- but he quickly planted his hands against the pavement and rolled himself back so he was at the boy’s feet. Once Billy was sure he wouldn’t die, he let go and dramatically put the back of his hand to his forehead.
“I should just quit now. Oh- once the newspaper hears about this, I’ll be doomed!”
The boy looked confused, squinting. “The.. what? No- that- you fell, dude. You’re fine, drama queen. Also- you don’t have any protective gear on. Were you just.. assuming you’d never fall?”
“Oh!” Billy blinked, already distracted as he awkwardly chuckled. “I’m not into skateboarding or like.. any of this stuff. I was just taking a walk and got, uh, distracted.”
“...Right.” The boy sighed, sounding unamused. Which was utter nonsense. Billy was very amusing! “Well. I kind of need mine, and a random stranger is kind of withholding it.”
“Nuh uh.” Billy huffed, staring up at him. “You’re just too inempedic to understand my sorrow.”
His brows furrowed, looking especially confused. “Inempedic? What the fuck is that?”
“Y’knoww.. like.. lacking the ability to put yourself in someone else's shoes? It’s a very important life skill. You should’ve learned it in like,.. kindergarden.” Billy informed with a shrug.
Billy watched as he just stood there for a moment, like it took a lot to actually understand.
“In- you mean unempathetic?”
“Hauh?” Billy blinked, feeling confused now. Err.. gulp. “Inempedic? Yeah. That’s what I said.”
Billy seemed to be confusing this boy more and more. He actually squatted down so they were closer to eye level.
“No- no. You’re saying In-em-ped-ic. It’s not an in, first of all, but it’s unempathetic. That’s the word you’re looking for, doofus.” Gasp! The gall! The nerve! Billy was not a doofus- he was a very, very smart dude.
“You literally just said the same word twice, bro.” Billy deadpanned, letting his head rest against the concrete. It was cozy down here- like sleeping on the floor was. Which was very cozy.
“What.” He sounded very offended, but also like he couldn’t quite wrap his brain around the sheer awesomeness of Billy’s logic. Because he was so logical and smart. “..No- no, it’s not. They don’t even sound the same.”
“Yuh huh. You said Inempedic and then unempedic. Which like, are basically the same word.” Billy reasoned, completely serious.
They just stared at each other for a minute or two. It was goofy. Billy had to keep himself from giggling, and this guy looked like he was face to face with a supernatural phenomenon.
“Okay. No. No no. That’s not how words work,- ….what’s your name?”
“Billy!”
“Sure. Billy. It’s not em-ped-ic. It’s empathetic. It’s Un..?”
“Un..”
“Em..?”
“Em..”
“Path..?”
“Path..”
“E..?”
“E…”
“Tic.”
“Tic!”
“Okay. Yeah. Now- y’know. Fully. Empathetic.”
“Empedic.” Billy struggled to keep from bursting out in laughter at the look he got in return.
“Ay Robin!” A voice called out from across the park. The boy in front of him looked up at the name.
“Hauh?” He called back with an equal volume. Did they not care for park manners?
..did skate parks have the same manners as normal parks? Billy actually didn’t know. Auhhh…
“Kyle and I are gonna race! You wanna join?” The voice called back. Billy didn’t care one bit to really listen to it.
‘Robin’ looked down at Billy, who was still refusing to get off of the board. Ah. Yes. Billy was starting to see this could develop into a problem.
“Do you mind getting off now?” Robin asked, sounding tired.
Billy, once again, considered if he should do the right thing.
“Nah.”
“Dude. I- this is my skateboard- I- how are you taking it hostage?” If Robin didn’t sound so amused, Billy would’ve let go.
It had turned into a whole thing that ended up with Billy holding on for dear life as Robin picked up and shook the board a bit, trying to get Billy off like he was a stray dog that wouldn’t leave.
So, now here they were, still at the park. Robin was sitting on a bench, Billy was sprawled on the floor with a tight grip on the skateboard. He didn’t even want it- he just wanted to have fun.
It was getting rather late though.. Bruce was probably gonna start texting him soon- and even worse- his mother.
Still. Billy was a stubborn son of a bitch and wasn’t planning on letting go till.. till…
Actually, why was he doing this? For the plot? Probably.
“I’m just cool like that.” Billy answered, grinning.
“It’s not ‘cool’, it’s mildly annoying.” Robin responded with a smile, flicking Billy’s forehead. Billy, of course, responded with a loud complaint and a flop like he had just been shot. Just without letting go of the board.
“Augh! You wound me..”
“Yeah, yeah.. you act like a theatre kid.”
“I do?” Billy blinked, interested now. Once again, he forgot that he was supposed to be hurt. “Do you think I’d be a good one?”
“Uhh..” Robin considered it, looking down at Billy. Billy almost forgot he just met this guy. “I think you’d be good at improv. Not sure you could stick to a script..”
Billy gasped, pulling a shocked face like Robin just insulted Billy’s entire core. “I totally could! I’m like- so good at memorizing shit!”
“Sure you could, Billy.” Robin said it teasingly, looking back up at the other skaters playing around.
Billy felt a buzz in his pocket. It could’ve been somebody else, but like, Billy wanted it to be Bruce.
Aka, that meant Billy scrambled to dig his phone out of his pocket like he was on fire, before wrapping one arm back around the skateboard before Robin could break free. Robin didn’t even notice the chance, too busy looking down at Billy because. Y’know. The guy just yipped and yelled and moved like he was on fire. 10/10 attention grabber if you asked Billy- that’s your advice for the day. If you ever want attention, pretend to be on fire.
Anyway- that wasn’t the point though. Billy just wanted to text Bruce. In which case- after flipping it open- it had been Bruce. Billy was pretty sure it was the best day in his life.
Robin blinked, interested. He was looking at the back of Billy’s flip phone- which was like, so totally cool. At least- Billy thought it was so totally cool. The back of his phone was a dark-ish red, but he added some puffy golden retriever stickers to it- and managed to find one with a doggy in a bike basket.
Anyway, back to Bruce.
— . —
bruceyy: hii r u home yet
billy_boy: no agsuh wil be soon!!
bruceyy: ok!! Lmk when u do!!
billy_boy: i will!!!
— . —
“Augh… I’ve got to go soon.” Billy announced to nobody in particular. He liked announcing things like that. It made him feel like he was talking to a crowd- which was hella fun.
“Makes sense. I’ve gotta wait for my friend to pick me up.. knowing him he’s doing something important.” Robin said with a shrug, but he smiled anyway. “You should come back soon. Just maybe what where you’re going.” He teased.
Billy flipped and put his phone back into his pocket. “You’re making fun of my sorrow. I don’t even trip that often!” It was a total lie, but like, this guy didn’t have to know that.
“Whatever you say man..”
—
Billy ended up back at his house a good bit later- he had gotten lost twice, but we don’t talk about that- and immediately faceplanted into bed. As long as Billy wasn’t wearing jeans or something, he didn’t give a fuck if he slept in them.
“Rarararar…” Billy grumbled as he pulled out his phone, flipping it open again. He was half asleep by now, but like, he wasn’t gonna just ignore Bruce’s worries. The dude was pretty chill, but he had a slight paranoia for things happening to his friends apparently. He really only seemed to care at night, though. When people were more alone and stuff. Which like- yeah. Fair.
— . —
billy_boy: im home
— . —
It took a couple of minutes before he got a reply back. Billy was already 62% sure Bruce was asleep.
— . —
bruceyy: ok!! sry im super tired
billy_boy: go sleep man. i’ll ttyl!!
bruceyy: kk!! gn!!
billy_boy: gnnn!!!!!!!
— . —
Billy was passed out by the time he even closed the phone. Oopsies.