Work Text:
Bbrae
Synapse or summary or whatever the frick
They were only ever glimpses. First entering a room seeing half of a green body for a split second before disappearing. Or feeling his emotional signature for a brief moment. She never gave it much thought though. It was *Beastboy* the happy go lucky kid who turns into ponies for kids, never stops making terrible jokes, insisting that ladies “love the ears”, what could *he* have to hide?
They were always the moments you didn’t expect that leave lasting impressions. It was routine by this point, they’ve beaten Trigon, a “villain of the week?” trying to “free his EBrothers and ESisters from the retched “Radio Shack” about 5 minutes from Titan Tower.
They’d done it hundreds of times. Only difference was this time she got sloppy. She hadn’t gotten the chance to meditate, and it was pushing 17:00 (Robin insisted on always using military time). Leading to small errors after sharp spikes of feelings.
She’d accept them, but not feel’ them. Knowledge talking her through the facts and leaning more on diagnosing what made her feel that way than actually focusing on how it *felt*. Sure, it was stupid, but it worked. Most of the time that is. This time she felt responsible. She should have been better.
“That’s not the point the point is he was stupid like always!”
One of the emotions tried to chime in but was silenced with a mental glare from Raven.
I could’ve taken it. I should’ve* been the one to take it, I was the reason why I was put in that situation. If I didn’t lose my cool and disintegrate the totaled car I was about to throw, that would’ve absorbed most of the blow. Only instead I felt a viscous pang of fear from a bystander that resonated with me.
I saw who it came from, a girl, standing frozen in shock, a man dressed in a mustard yellow. The visual brought me back to the last moments on Azarath when the monks were sending me here.
It startled me, caused me to lose focus for a second. A second that could cost him. He was always nearby, it was a blessing and a curse. That meant he’d be the one to take the bluntness of her rejection after a particularly hard day. Also meant he was there to see the small victories when she’d smirk at one of his dumb jokes, or when she congratulated him (she told herself she did it sarcastically) on winning against cyborg on whatever game they were playing that day.
An unknown item cracked from the fondness she was feeling, thus snapping her back into why she was doing this.
Right. While I was levitating myself, with nothing in-between overloads path of lightning. She was about to attempt to teleport when she got shoulder checked mid air.
They were only 6-8 feet in the air, so while it didn’t tickle, every titan had taken hits much more debilitating than that. Out of instinct she angrily looked back up to see what or who struck her when she heard him yelp. As quickly as it started it was gone, attempting to find the source all she saw was a Smokey trail leading higher into the sky. About another 16 feet to be exact.
Once she registered it, she flew straight ahead to try and intercept him from a potentially fatal blow. He was arcing towards the street back and head leading the way.
She heard something in the background, a rush, a sizzle or something she can’t remember.
She put everything she had into as fast as she could go. Only it wasn’t enough. She was close enough to hear the sickening thud of the back of his skull hit and slide across the pavement. The sound and its echo are as far as I can remember.
The others told her she screamed. They also were on their way, Starfire carrying cyborg, Robin on the R Cycle.
Apparently overload had been dealt with thanks to a portal Raven doesn’t even remember *thinking* about opening that dropped enough water on him to flood almost 2 blocks in each direction. The only reason they weren’t both soaked was due to the force field she also put up without cognitive thought.
Once she landed she could already see blood pooling slightly around his scalp. The rest of his body motionless and crumpled.
She has flickers from there, glassy eyed recollections of sensing him, healing the back of his scalp, starting on the road rash on his back.
Cyborgs hand on her shoulder as Starfire loads him into the T Car. Looking back at where he landed, the lamp posts, hot dog stand, and phone booth near them had melted. Not from fire but just… melted.
As if the objects decided to liquify and resolidify a few seconds later. Knowing she had to be the cause she told them to update her on which hospital they bring him to and when they get there.
That’s when she teleported here. Immediately lit the candles and sat down here.
She reopened her eyes. Surprised to find herself in Nevermore. She hadn’t used the mirror, which she thought was the only way in here.
“I can’t believe he’d do that. We take hits for each other all the time sure but what the hell was he thinking! He could’ve died from the fall alone! WE CAN GO INTO A HEALING TRANCE HE CANT!” Anger shouted, breathing heavily, and almost looked as if her cloak started to sizzle.
Happy was rubbing timid back as timid was sitting in the fetal position rocking back and forth repeating “it’s all my fault.” Happy of course denied it repeatedly.
Even knowledge looked surprised to see her. “Raven?” I didn’t know you planned on heading here, I thought you’d check on Garfield when you were done meditating.”
*Garfield? Since when did that become a thing?* she absentmindedly thinks.
“Yeah. So did I. Mind telling me why I’m here?” Raven asked the emotions
All of them looking just as unaware and oblivious as the rest. Apart from timid who still is sitting staring at her feet.
Knowledge just mutters a quiet and brief “Fascinating” immediately conjuring a pen and paper. “You mean that you didn’t use the mirror to get here?”
“No. I was trying to better accept what happened so I wouldn’t be stable enough to check on him, wherever he’s at. How long was I meditating for?”
Knowledge summons 3 more books quickly speed reading them before finding what she was looking for and tossing the other two back into portals.
“It says here that this should only be possible at extreme emotional distress or-“ she stops, eyes retracing what she just read before reading it to herself again.
“Or what”
Knowledge immediately goes rigid and throws the book into a portal. Looking her square in the eyes.
“I can’t tell you.” Knowledge turns back around to study a book about the structural anatomy of the human skull.
Before Raven can even argue she’s thrown out onto her bed, looking into a portal leading into nevermore. Eyes widening in utter astonishment at both what knowledge just said, and with what she accomplished.
“I’ll do my best to keep them in check until you’re back. Good luck” with that the portal closed.
It takes her 1.9 seconds to completely take in what just happened, immediately be pissed she got kicked out of her own head and stomp over to the dresser to find the mirror.
She holds it up and gets ready.
Any second now.
Any- WHY ISNT IT WORKING?!
The reflection of Raven suddenly transforms into knowledge. “Stop Raven, I know you’re upset. I’m you. But the more you give rage strength the harder it’s going to be and we don’t want her to get control. Just trust me, well trust yourself on this one.”
Reluctantly, she concedes that if this is the situation she’s stuck in. Then yeah, the one emotion she shouldn’t give strength to is rage
With a million different questions entering her mind at once, there’s only one she truly cares about.
Is he okay?
Reaching into her cloak she felt her communicator, and powered the device on while bringing it out. The light from the screen significantly stronger than the now almost burnt out candles.
“The tower doesn’t have a CT scanner, had to take him to Jump City ER, I’ll send you the location.” The message was sent 3 hours and 49minutes ago. As she was about to rely another came through “Preliminary exam looked good, waiting on results of the CT now.” She should go there.
Raven sent a response asking for the floor and room number. No need to waste time checking in she’ll just teleport straight in.
Seconds after she sent it she got a response detailing everything she asked.
Now that her powers weren’t completely on the fritz she looked at the location and immediately sent her soul self to search for it.
She found it in record time for something of that distance, even the team seemed slightly surprised to see her just mere seconds after the text was sent.
Only thing was when she arrived the bed was empty. Confusion flooded her face and before she could. Robin (whose hand seemed to be held prisoner by both of Starfire) stated “he’s still going through imaging. You sealed all the external would but they need to make sure there’s no “inter-cranial hemorrhaging or pressure build up.” Last thing we want is for him to have a stroke when his heart rate elevates slightly.” Even from the “cold clearheaded leader” that Jump City Magazine recently did a whole piece about. There was a near imperceivable detection of uncertainty and worry. Starfire appeared to take note of it tho as she squeezed his hand slightly.
Now just waiting on time she kept replaying the events in nevermore. She only ever called him Garfield to him, and that’s only because he seemed to hate it. Only recently had it stopped bothering him so much, even chuckles at the Lasagna jokes Cyborg will make at him.
More importantly, what could be both so profound that it drew her into nevermore. Come to think of it looked different too. The sky seemed to be a deeper purple, recalling her interactions with the emotions she noticed timid wasn’t just timid, she seemed inconsolable. Happy even had just a smirk, her smile not wide enough to show teeth or force her eyes closed.
Anger was anger of course. Knowledge was… studying something? I wonder if she saw the changes too and was documenting them.
Then she was kicked out, of her own mind. The audacity. Keeping her cool she then focused on what could have caused the nevermore visit, maybe that had to do with her being forcefully ejected from it too.
She was completely erratic. Even exploding one of the candles she was about to grab when a memory of his unconscious face unexpectedly flashed in her mind.
She was doing her usual routine of recalling the things that made her upset and accepting them. Accepting why they upset her, and helping her feel less of it every time she did so.
She was doing well until that unexpected tangent about the way Garfield makes her feel. The butterflies, the way he always involves her, the feeling we get when he smiles with his fang poking out-
Her leg stopped bouncing. She doesn’t even know when she started that, or when she sat down for that matter.
She immediately searches in her mind for any of the emotions to see if it was them implanting the thought. *happienss I know that was you.* -silence- *We really going to do the quiet game right now because you got caught?*
Knowledge answers this time, the smirk evident in her voice alone. “Happiness is right next to me, it wasn’t her, tho I am having trouble containing her after your sudden revelation.”
Why would his smile make her so- The revelation hit her like a ton of bricks that left her with one word she said aloud: “oh.”
Just like that knowledge had no reason to hold any of them back, she needed to realize it herself or else she’d just keep blaming emotions like Happy for “implanting” the thought. The sudden influx of emotions startled her lightly and caused a floor tile to crack.
She’d gotten significantly better though, that many emotions in that short amount of time would’ve been enough to crack every window and lightbulb on the floor at one point in time.
She’s known for a little while now Beast Boy has developed feelings for her. She never did anything about it because she never thought she could. She convinced herself it would pass. Surprised that *anyone* let alone him, would have romantic feelings for her.
Then time went on and the feeling didn’t dim, growing stronger even with just passing through the halls and getting a smile from her made him feel so much. That is until he’d notice her getting g feedback from said emotions and they’d suddenly stop. Something she hasn’t encountered before.
Either way, it got tossed on the back burner. To be fair they are saving the world what feels like once month. Now she has feelings… romantic feelings… for Beast boy.
Are we sure the world didn’t end when my father took over and this isn’t an incredibly elaborate joke?
No that wouldn’t make sense. Anyway, she knows why she got affected from his injury and the reason she got pulled into an altered nevermore. A new emotion.
Passion/Love
A nurse wheeled his bed back in with a doctor accompanying her. She still has a reputation to uphold. So she stayed sitting down and patient for the 20minutes it took her to read the chart (it was 8seconds).
“Everything seems to be in good working condition, save for a few minor things that his healing ability should take care of. I’d still prefer to keep him here for a few days to make sure. Especially considering the amount of unknown variables and all.” He didn’t look at anyone specific but Raven felt the annoyance with someone doubting her magic’s capabilities. Even if she can’t recall exactly what she did, she knows she did it flawlessly.
The nurse reattached the IV to his left arm, now working on setting up an IV bag and getting a drip going. Raven approached his bed from the right. She did a gentle probe of his mind to determine a few things. A few hairline fractures she didn’t get to heal, with his healing it should be gone within a few days at most.
She had no way of knowing but she hoped he’d wake up soon.
Cyborg recorded the entire thing, he’ll listen to it again on the way back to the tower to make sure he didn’t miss anything.
“How long before we can transfer him to the med bay in the tower?” Asked *Cyborg* of all people.
The doctor was slightly taken aback tilting his head in confusion.
“I assure you, we are more than capable of-“
Cyborg cut him off, hand in the universal “stop” signal. Wanting to clear things up before they became an issue he continued.
“Sorry doc, that’s not how I meant it. I just” glancing around the room seeing the confused faces on everyone except Raven who still stared at Beast Boy (she was also a fan of returning him to the tower).
“I- just, I didn’t mean it like that, but we’d still like to move him as soon as possible.”
The doctor, still slightly confused but willing to work with the Titans, closed Beast Boys chart and looked at said man in the hospital bed.
For me to feel comfortable letting him go, I’d say 24 hours there’s one area I still want to keep a close eye on. As for when you can move him, he’s more than stable to do so now. I would still like to m give him some more antibiotics. Especially if the would was as deep as you said, I’ve seen patients get worse infections from smaller would in less time who weren’t just thrown onto oil filled pavement after getting electrocuted.” He finally looked back at Cyborg for the last sentence.
Cyborg shook his head and pushed his luck… again.
“Is it possible to finish the remaining treatment back at the tower? I’m fully qualified to give IVs if need be. It’s just. A personal matter that I’d rather not get into right now.” *Now* everyone looked at him curiously. Cyborg ignored all of them.
The doctor huffed and pinched his eyebrows. “Technically he doesn’t *need* the antibiotics. In my professional opinion though, it’d be at a minimum one last dose that’ll finish *glancing at the IV bag the nurse just started (and the drip rate she set) along with his watch“ about an hour and a half?” Still frustrated, especially considering the reason he’s gotten so far is equivalent to “trust me bro”.
Cyborg nodded his head and approached him to shake his hand, thanking him for doing everyone he’s done, and for the urgency at which he was able to get things done at.
“Thank you Dr. Parker. Truly, I trust Raven with my life, I just wanted to make sure-“ this time it was the doctors turn to cut him off.
“Absolutely, Raven actually saved my daughter a year or so back. So I have no doubt in my mind of her capabilities. It never hurts to be safe in these circumstances, you did the right thing. *glancing at the Nurse* Please see to it that the discharge papers are ready for them the moment the IV’s finished.” Then last but not least he turned his entire body towards Raven.
“I never got the chance to thank you” *he took a small step forward placing his hand on her shoulder* something she wasn’t a fan of sure, but given the situation, she’ll allow it this once. “I can’t begin to describe in words how much my daughter is my everything. I’m so grateful you were there that day, and were able to save her. Thank you. As for your friend, I truly do believe he’ll be ok, but please keep me updated if there’s anything else I can help with. I owe you all a debt I can never repay.” With that the door closed shut leaving just the Titans in the room.
Robin speaking up the moment the door closed “Would you care to explain your ~plucky~ attitude towards the man who just treated your best friend-“
“-Brother. He’s more than a friend, he’s family. So are all of you, if you knew my reasoning you’d be ~plucky~ to get him back to the tower. Before you ask, no it’s not my place to tell, you’ll just have to trust me on this one.” Cyborg started to walk towards the exit
“I’m going to go get the med bay ready for him.” His robotic eye scanning the antibiotic on the way out. He’ll finish the treatments. It’s not hard. As he’s walking the elevator he just says a simple, “all I can hope is he doesn’t wake up in the next 2hrs.”
Starfire learned of the balloons custom and was trying to force Robin into taking her to the gift shop below. Robin asked Raven if she was ok staying with him in case he woke up, to which she of course nodded. This being her ideal scenario, Starfire then tore Robin out of the room almost dislocating his shoulder in the process.
Raven was extremely curious about why Cyborg was so gung ho on getting Beast Boy out asap. She loved the idea of him back in the tower and yes she was confident in her healing abilities but he seemed to want it for a different reason. She’ll figure out why at a later date. She grabbed one of the chairs with her powers it appearing below her, in the nick of time.
She physically looked around, not just an emotion reading nearby. She needed visual confirmation no one else would see this. Hell she can’t believe she’s about to do this either. Silently she turned back to beast boy and slid her hand underneath his only to realize the nurse put his gloves back on after the CT scan? Why the hell would they do that?
She didn’t care. She already decided she was going to hold his damn hand, so now she might as well do it properly. She undid the Velcro and tried to tug. They were surprisingly tight. After one more tug she got it, now to-
Ravens eyes widened at the sight. Claws, she wasn’t frightened or disgusted by them, just simply surprised. When did these come in? Surely she can narrow it down from the last time she seen him with his gloves off.
She needs to make a mental note to ask Knowledge to start searching her memories for any sign of his hands.
No matter, she can deal with claws hell, without even needing to *think* that she could *really* enjoy them in the right scenarios her face turns beet red. Azar she JUST found out she likes this boy and these are the thoughts she’s having? The next nevermore meeting is going to be the longest yet.
She once again slipped her hand underneath his, firmly grasping it. Feeling the calloused finger tips from god knows what, but under her thumb in the dorsal side of his hand, she felt… ridges, uneven surfaces and odd textures. She looks down at his hand and her breathing stopped completely. Tounge depressors snapping in their sterile containers. What happened?
His hands were riddled with scars, some she couldn’t determine the cause, others looked like, cigarettes being put out, possible whippings, and what frightened her most were the surgical precision rings around every finger, some fingers having more than just one. His pinky was also slightly bent in an odd direction, probably from a dislocation that wasn’t set properly before healing. Wondering how she never noticed before she picked up his glove and sure enough, the pinky had reinforced metal around the outer edge to better keep it in its proper position. Not to fix it, but to make it less noticeable.
That wasn’t even all of it. She finally exhaled the remaining air and took another breath in, only then realizing the slight glassy state of her eyes. She couldn’t help but take her other hand and wipe her thumb on his cheek and murmur “What haven’t you told me Garfield?”
She held his hand for 5 more minutes before placing his glove back on. If he didn’t want people to know, that’s up to him. She’ll still try and convince him to live freely but, she’s known him for years and this has never even been brought up, she doubts she’ll be able to change his mind anytime soon.
While placing his glove on she noticed the long sleeve gown. She didn’t even know they made those. Curiosity brimming at her fingertips she stopped herself inches from the sleeves. No. She didn’t know about the hands. There could be other things. He should be the one to show me on purpose. Not from me snooping around. If the roles were reversed she wouldn’t care the reasoning she’d already be tearing him a new one for the glove situation. Patience.
He lurched up from the lying position he was in scaring the bejesus out of Raven. Both inhaled large gulps of air. He immediately noticing several things at the same time. He was uncomfortable, open. His back was contacting the not soft and not comfortable sheeting. Sheets that weren’t his. Eyes said too bright going to reach to cover them only one hand came up.
The fluorescent lighting burning his eyes with the steady hum accompanied by it. The hum overshadowed from the now rapidly beeping monitor of some kind. The worst was the smell, the over used disinfectant that someone still missed hints of previous patients. Dozens of smells mixing concocting into something even worse. Causing an array of unpleasant feelings and even worse *memories* to flood back in.
~
*Nonono please, not again! Please, you don’t need to do this sir!* Garfield’s voice higher pitched, his voice rough and full of anguish
The incredibly thick accent didn’t mask any feelings of disgust and annoyance he was feeling
“I’ve told you before. It-“ he begins to carefully slice into his patient -“is Doctor to you, vermin!”
He can still remember the pain, of cutting into bone, the way they’d throw him back into his cage when they were finished taking samples. The way even the guards would refrain from eye contact, how he’d have to shift into something that could go longer without food. Or worst of all, his own thoughts. The thoughts of universe deciding this is what he deserved after everything he’s done. The people he was forced to hurt, the owners of the stores he had to rob. The people he wasn’t able to save.
~
The memories still hurt. The lingering pain on phantom limbs returning after force transforming into a an animal with stronger regeneration factors. It never felt nice. Not like Ravens. The feeling of being drained, all your energy put into one thing. Not to mention the growing pains.
These flashbacks normally last significantly longer but he hasn’t had one in quite a while. The shimmer of dark purple hair. The faint smell of lavender candles lingering on her cloak. The way his chest tightens and feels like the air in his lungs was evaporated.
The snapshot memory of her in danger was enough to completely snap him out of his flashback. Eyes now focusing on what’s actually in front of him his eyesight adjusting to the overpowered lights.
Raven. She’s ok. Memories flooding him like a cold shower, overload, raven in danger. Can’t let it happen. Then nothing. The beeping from the machine drawing his attention away from her, the heart rate monitor spiking severely as- Ravens hand grabbed his face and realigned it to look at her. God her hands were soft.
His mind no longer solely focused on protecting Raven the situation he was in crept back in. Distant voices, animals crying, cages rattling, the smell of fecal matter and blood mixing.
He can’t. Even for a second, he can’t go back there. Not again, please.
Eyes now locking onto her. He whispered two words from his scratchy and seriously dry throat.
“Home. Please.”
Seeing the utterly terrified reaction he just had and according to the rapid beeping monitor is still having. Raven made an executive decision that she couldn’t care less who disagrees with it. She teleported both of them back to the tower. The easiest and fastest was to go to place she already had memorized by heart. Her room.
Garfield eyes stayed on her as everything else faded black and suddenly began forming. He’s knows it was super cool and law defying sight to see. However, he currently had the best view in the galaxy and he is going to enjoy every second of her.
His breathing began to slow and she too breathed an almost silent sigh of relief. Asking him a simple question ”you ok?” concern etched on every gorgeous curve and aspect of her.
“Yeah I just… I… don’t like hospitals.” He said simply, he hates to have to lie to her. This isn’t lying! It just, wasn’t the complete truth. Enough of the truth to hopefully answer enough of her questions for her not to dig deeper.
“The smells of disinfectant used too often, hand sanitizer with obsessive amounts of alcohol, fluorescent lighting, needles, lab coats. They’re all… overwhelming” *Reminders* is what he wanted to say. He looked downwards out of shame for not telling the whole truth… but something else took the forefront, as his eyes widened in realization.
She was holding his hand. Raven. Was holding his *Garfield Logans* hand…
Raven looked downwards to see what he was staring at, only to let go with a speed that could rival The Flash’s. Face blushing so hard she could cosplay rage.
He slowly stared at her with his mouth slightly agape
She simply sat there on the edge of his bed. “Don’t get used to it. I was just ya know… making sure… that you had a pulse.” She huffed and internally groaned while face palming. Whatever he won’t push it if she shows enough annoyance.
“I liked it.” He said
“What?”
“I liked when you held my hand.” Mind slowly catching up to the check his mouth just cashed.
Yeah he definitely had a concussion. There’s no way in hell he would be saying this while I’m full control of his thoughts.
Beast boy finally glanced around the room realizing where they were.
“We’re in your room…” - said surprised but not nearly as much from the physical contact.
“Yeah well, you wanted to leave and this was the first and fastest place I could get you to without preparing. You’re still not allowed in here under normal circumstances.”
He lightly exhaled from his nose the way you’d seen something just funny enough to get a reaction but not funny enough for a chuckle. “I should get struck by lightning more often” he said with a crooked smile due to his snaggle too-
*SLAP*
He sat frozen on her bed, head still angled towards the door due to her slapping with her right hand.
A far more rough and somehow even *more* firm voice said “Don’t you *EVER* do that again! You could have DIED Garfield!” She said grabbing both of his shoulders, eyes tinted red due to rage having a little control over the wheel.
He looked at her, really did. He still thought she was gorgeous with red eyes.
Feeling that emotion from him caused rage to leave, not knowing what to do with said knowledge. She was embarrassed sure but once he noticed he straightened his back and suddenly the emotions she was feeling were gone.
“How do you-“ Her communicator started ringing showing Cyborgs picture as the caller ID.
“Oh my AZAR If Cyborg interrupts ANYONE ONE MORE TIME TODAY IM GOING TO LOSE MY SHIT! Rage screamed inside Ravens mind
“Raven?? The hospital just called they said bestboy not in his room, no one knows where he’s at *please* tell me he’s with you!” Cyborg frantically pleading through the speakers
“Hey Cy! Yeah, I woke up and uh… Raven teleported me to the tower cause-“
“You don’t need to explain BB, I didn’t know you two were in the tower, I’m just setting up the last antibiotic treatment now.” His voice softer than usual
“We don’t have to do it today, just sometime in the next two days ok? Let me know whenever you’re ready.”
She flipped the communicator closed and stared at him hoping he’ll continue the conversation where it was left off. Instead he did what Beast Boy does best. Talk.
“So, did we beat overload, I don’t remember much after ya know…” resulting in a stern glare from Raven. He just nervously chucked it off and scratched the back of his neck.
“Yes I- *Ahem* we took care of it. Don’t think you’re getting out of this beastboy. You’re telling me something, I deserve it. I’m your friend.” That somehow seemed to cut him deeper than anything else he experienced today which was saying a LOT.
“Yeah I know, I know. It’s just not something I like to think about let alone having others know about it. The people who’ve known act differently after, and I don’t want that. I finally feel like I sorta belong here, and I didn’t for a long time. It had nothing to do with you guys, well that’s technically not true. But it’s not for what you think!” He expected to have to rush an answer out after fumbling over his own worlds. To his surprise she was listening intently, waiting for the full story before jumping to conclusions.
He took a slow breath and closed his eyes to continue.
“Yes it had to do with you guys but it’s because I felt out of place. There’s an alien princess, a living computer, the apprentice of Batman. THE BATMAN. Then there’s you, the literal most amazing person in the world!”
Raven whispered “not person, demon.” Which he immediately blew off with a half hearted eyeroll and a “whatever, if you ask me you’re an angel not a demon.”
He knew speaking before thinking would bite him in the ass, he just didn’t expect this much of an incompetent move.
Within seconds both of them turned beet red, Raven immediately hiding under her hood while beast boy was forced to show off his now pink tinted pointy ears on full display.
Trying to recover from the tumble he continued.
“How am I supposed to compete with that Raven? I turn into poor replicas of animals, the only thing I’ve had that’s mine, is the worst part about me. I mean god Raven I almost hurt you. Part of me kept thinking I needed to be contained, but you kept me going.”
“You know that’s not what it is and it’s not what happened right?” She asked while giving him the eyes that said “We’ve been through this before.”
“I know but. You asked me why I’m telling you why. It’s the way I felt, I’ve gotten better but I still have my moments of weakness.” Looking down at his cursed hands he couldn’t help but think that if she knew what were underneath her opinions would change.
“Take them off” she commanded sternly.
Blushing FURIOUSLY he couldn’t help but LOVE to hear that in a different context.
“Wh- what?? What do you mean? Take what off?” He scurried backward to her head board hiding his gloves underneath his thighs hoping she didn’t mean those.
“Your gloves. Take them off. I see you staring at them constantly. Do you truly think so little of me that I’d judge you based off your hands?” She once again closed the distance now not sitting on the edge but the middle of her bed, legs crossed.
“You know that’s not what-“
“Then what is it Garfield? Please tell me, you’ve helped me get over my insecurities.”
*inside her head happiness thought BB could use a little encouragement so she did something she NEVER does. She took the wheel*
“I remember the first time you complimented my skin tone. I was so shocked, it’s the reason I wore my cloak, I thought I’d scare kids, scare you guys. And when the villain of the week made a throw away comment about it during a fight. You just *knew* it affected me when no one else did. You walked straight up to me as red as rage, and said “fortherecordIlikeyourskin” “andIthinkyouresuperpretty!”
Bolting down the corridor so fast you kicked up dust.” She chuckled at the memory replaying in her head
She didn’t *giggle* at the memory, she couldn’t make Raven look like THAT or else she’d be put next to rage and never be let out purely out of spite.
“I’ve never seen timid so proud before. She went a full 2 days without her cloak. Sure she put it back on eventually, or else she wouldnt be called timid would she? But that was the first major step for us and positive affirmation.”
Raven now finally able to rip control back, or happy let her have it. Whichever she was furious and will need to have a SERIOUS conversation in nevermore. They’ve never acted out so much until recently.
She wondered if he’ll even still be green after this from all the blushing. Once again she sees his nervous tick of scratching the back of his neck.
“You remembered that huh? I just. It’s different for me.” He struggled at finding the words and then just gave up with a “I can’t explain it.” Which backfired TREMENDOUSLY
“Then show me. Please Garfield” Damnit, why does he love his name when it’s coming out of her mouth?!
He locks eyes not moving a millimeter.
“You promise not to tell the others? Well cyborg knows but that’s because of my team physical.”
“I promise, I don’t think they’ll think less of you. They will find out eventually, but not from me, it’s your secret to tell.”
God was her hair blowing in the breeze in her ROOM?! That doesn’t even make sense! How can she be this pretty *ALL* the freaking time?!
He can’t believe he’s doing this right now. Anyone else would surely be told to go eat grass.
He slowly undid his glove and applying pressure on oddly specific locations the glove coming off significantly easier than it was earlier for her.
In all honesty, she didn’t need to act surprised. She still is. What or who could do such a thing, to Garfield no less. She gently picked up his hand while he looked away afraid if he looks he’ll see her disgusted face and that would make it real.
She slid her hand under his her thumb tracing his scars patterns before she knew what she was doing.
His tears silently started to fall.
His hand slowly pulled away from hers. “I’m sorry Raven. If you knew the things I’ve done, things that can never be forgotten or forgiven. Thank you for healing me. I’m sorry you had to-
“Garfield you saved my life. Do you understand that?” Her voice was firm. The type it was when she was determined. God this was going to be a difficult task to get out of this.
He stayed silent, as much as he bragged about “I’m the best, SUCK it Cy” while dancing in a very poor manner. He never bragged or rubbed it in someone’s face when he helped them. Like the brotherhood ordeal. Even with the congratulations he received after the Titans defeat them, he never took credit. “It was a team effort! None of us could have done it without the other.” Which was at the time the craziest thing she’s ever heard him say.
“What can I do to show you that you can trust me?” With just the sliver of a note of affection mixed with pleading
He had nothing for that. The main issue being he DOES trust her. More than anyone in the tower, probably even the world.
Finally making eye contact ”You won’t see me the same way again.” It was barely audible.
She nodded her head. She wasn’t concerned about life altering views of him honestly, this is Beast Boy. It’s not like *he’s* half demon who is a prophecy to end the world.
Exhaling a breath that sounded more like defeat than she wanted to admit. Yes she felt bad pushing him so much so soon, but. She’s dying to know, ok poor choice of words given recent events.
“What do you want to know?”
A thousand questions rushed through her head, knowledge shouting most of them but a few others creeped in. “How can he stop our process of reading emotions? What are the scars from?” A very dirty thought from a the new emotion “how big is it??” However one question she felt she could get the most possible avenues from was
“Why did you push me out of the way?”
His face flushed
“That’s what we do Raven, we save people-“
“Don’t give me that bullshit Gar, I don’t need to read your ‘somehow silent’ emotions to know that you’re giving me the full truth. You already would’ve had to be mid leap before the shield I had was gone.”
He sighs, defeated for the umpteenth time today. “I was flying towards you redirecting towards overload to do… something idk. When I noticed the car. To be honest Raven. I didn’t think, I just did it. Everything in me demanded… ‘protect’. So I stopped redirecting and transformed into myself to not hurt you but to have enough weight to move you out of the way.” *He doesn’t need to tell her the word that came after. Protect covers it* he thought to himself.
Raven couldn’t help but feel slightly disappointed at that. It’s the obvious reason yes, she just was expecting more. Maybe her powers were wrong.
No. She *knows* she felt that from him in the past, but similar to now he always shuts off the tap when he notices his emotions might be affecting her.
Maybe he doesn’t feel that way anymore: not that she could tell, he’s blocking her out again somehow. Had she blown her chance at a relationship with him?
Wait when did she start thinking about that*, last she knew she was barely able to call it a crush! Now she’s imagining a *relationship*?!
Passion distantly yells from inside her mind “Sorry! I got carried away with that.”
Apparently she was silent for a little too long because whether or not he noticed, feelings of worry crept through his walls. Worrying he might’ve said something wrong, offended her in some way.
She can use this.
Then she had a *really* bad idea. “You could always summon a sliver of me? I promise not to do anything crazy! Just give him the *looks up with a slight pout* thing going and see if we get any feelings of affection or maybe even desire?”
It would be tough to weed through the sadness he is now* radiating and growing concerns the longer she’s-
“Uhhh… Raven? Did I say something wrong? I can leave if you’d like, I just-“
“No Beast Boy, you’re fine. Second question, what happened to your hand? I was thinking and I don’t know if I’ve ever seen you with your gloves off… ever. Or any part of your body, even swimming you’d keep your uniform-“
Disgust, anguish, and depression hit her like a truck. She kept her face neutral, if he realized he’d stop.
“On.” She played off the pause as the realization of what that could mean about the rest of his body.
“Can I skip this one?” His eyes started to water slightly, hoping not to go down this road tonight.
“I promise I’ll tell you but… Im just drained after tonight. I don’t know if my brain is operating at its full potential.” He laughed though nothing else about him indicated he was laughing on the inside.
*Of course!* Azar how could I be so selfish!!! He almost DIED for me tonight and the first thing I do is put him on trial just because I’m curious!!
Raven realized her errors and immediately retracted and deciding nothing else will be talked about today unless he decides to. Right after this…
“Of course Gar, I’m sorry. I- I shouldn’t have pushed so hard and especially right now while you’re probably sore and tired.”
She purposefully leaned her head down only a fraction, then lifted only her eyes to meet his. “Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?” Before she could even finish the sentence, she continued before he could do his classic babbling nonsense thing he does when nervous. Though it was incredibly reassuring just how *much* affection, desire and spike of arousal he had from just a glance and an innuendo.
“I could teleport to your favorite pizza place, or… *she shuddered* play a video game with you?” Safe to say she felt, extremely bad for getting caught up in her own curiosity that she forgot about how it could al be affecting him.
His eyes both lit up and a single eyebrow raised slightly due to confusion.
“But- you always tell me your teleportation isn’t a tool to be used for foot-tile tasks”
She actually smiled at that.
“Futile. It’s futile beastboy. And this wouldn’t be, it has a purpose. This purpose being making you happy, which is in fact my goal right now. You did save my life after all.”
Both blushing at his misremembering of her words and shock from her blatantly saying she wanted to do something with him.
“Are you sure? I don’t want you to feel obligated just because- ya know.” He once again avoided saying almost dying, not wanting to face her wrath.
“Please, Beastboy have you ever seen me do *anything* I haven’t wanted to?”
“I mean there was that one time with your fa-“
Eyes widening and mouth snapping closed so fast he felt the vibration into his eyeballs and most certainly was heard by Raven.
Her smile had in fact dropped but she tried to act unaffected by it.
He immediately put his hands one ungloved, into his face and grumbled “way to ruin another moment beastboy.”
“Oh, did you think we were having a moment? Could you elaborate?” The smirk now replaced with mischievous grin.
Crap, she was having a harder time controlling the new emotion than the others. She needs an excuse to meditate before doing anything with him.
Head shooting up at her statement now more red than a fire alarm.
“Uhhh- nope. No I would not. Care to elaborate that is. Ahem. I’ll uh decide on our activity- *eyes once again widening even more at the possible interpretation of that* “I’ll let you know and see ya later!”
So flustered he got up, and fast walked to her door when he realized he wasn’t in his uniform. In fact his back seemed to get really cold right now-
Flipping around again to face her his face now drained of all color in record time only to be replaced with even warmer more vibrant blood resembling a stop sign.
Raven on the other hand was shocked. All of the emotions were. They stared in awe as the TV showing what Raven saw displayed something they had never seen before.
Beast boy’s bare ass and back which was incredibly toned but riddled with scars. There couldn’t be an untouched aspect of his back that wasn’t over a few inches.
None of them were focused on the upper half of him though. Every emotion except rage flushed with their mouths agape. Knowledge pulled out a Polaroid camera from seemingly nowhere and snapped a pic without taking her eyes off the screen.
Rage only smirked.
Raven now standing, an automatic reaction from being surprised to this extent, along with one of her bookshelves exploding in spectacular fashion as loose pages fell like rain on (and between) them.
Silence for what felt like an eternity, Beastboy decided it would be best to just burn this memory and imagine like it never happened because if he accepted the fact that RAVEN his crush since the team started and the most beautiful girl he’s laid his eyes on. Just saw his bare ass, and possibly dingle and berries depending on the temperature in her room.
He didn’t know what the temp was right now because his face was currently on fire. He snapped back to his senses when a page fell on his head, drooping to cover his eyes.
He popped out of sight by transforming into a snake and slithering under the door with ease before transforming into a cheetah and sprinting to his room like his life depended on it. Hell for all he knows it does, Raven has been known to be unpredictable in the past. Especially when it comes to him.
She stared at the door for several minutes. Face now back to a mostly normal pale grey, she digested what just happened as her emotions were still high (if it wasn’t obvious from the small paper tornado she was standing in the eye of). I saw… *her lamp she used to read while in bed popped*
Ok Raven. Relax. Immediately dropping into the cross legged pose and meditating so she could do anything without destroying the towers electrical system.
10 minutes later.
She opened her eyes the last of the papers were almost done falling to the floor.
I saw his… well. Everything. *pop*
The last light suffered the consequences of the accidental mooning, but Raven didn’t move.
Meanwhile… all the emotions in Raven now finally relaxed *enough* from ravens mini meditation all stood huddled around a yellow cloaking holding a now formed Polaroid of Beasyboy’s bare backside.