Work Text:
Tim spends a lot of time thinking. It's hard not to when you're as trapped in your own brain like Tim had always been. Sometimes, it wasn't nice thoughts that echoed in his brain. Sometimes his brain antagonizes him just as much as any Gotham supervillian ever could.
You're not man enough. You're never going to be man enough. The thought swirls around his head until he can't take it anymore, tears streaming down Tim's face. In a way, he was lucky that Jason had stepped out to grab some take out for the both of them because it gave him time to cry on his own without being pitied.
Gender dysphoria had never hit him this hard before. But his figure was still rounded out, still too feminine for his own liking, despite all the steps he took to fix it. And he tries not to think about it, to be honest. Tim tries to push it to the side and see the good, he tries to push it aside and see how far he'd come, but he couldn't. He still felt too feminine, too small and dainty, and he hated it.
He didn't know what more he could do to fix it.
Tim hears the door crack open and instantly wipes his eyes. There was a million and one things Jason shouldn't have to deal with and this mosst certainly was one of them. The thoughts in his head were too much to offload on Jason—a guy who'd been through a hell of a lot in regards to his own transition—so stuffing all of this down was the best option for both of them, all things considered.
Jason enters, his combat boots loud against the tile of the apartment entrance. "Hey Timbit," Jason says.
"Hey," Tim replies. Tim looks dejectedly into his cup of coffee, not wanting to meet Jason's gaze out of fear that he would thoroughly be called out. Jason always had the ability to see him, far beyond what anyone could even begin to comprehend.
"What's wrong?" Jason asks. His foosteps echo ever closer, until they're right in front of Tim. "Hey, hey, what's wrong?" Jason is tender with him, leaving small reassuring touches on Tim's skin.
"I'm sorry," Tim says, voice shaky. He's still trying to calm himself, "I didn't hear ya come in, Jayce—"
"What? Why are you apologizing for?" Jason replies,"You haven't done anything wrong—"
You're not a man, you'll never be a man, echoes in his brain again—taunting him, like it wants Tim to break. And break he does, because the more Tim catches a glimpse of his reflection the more the tears build up until they spill again. "Look at me, Jason," Tim says, "I'm not a man. I'm too feminine looking and small."
"I love you, Timbit," Jason says, pressing a kiss into his forehead, "You're perfect the way you are. Ya hear me? You're still finding yourself and going down your path to be who you are, give yourself some time. It took me a while to figure all this out, so to think that you need to have it all squared away on the first try isn't fair to you. But that doesn't mean you're less of a man for it."
When Tim feels Jason's arms wrap around him, holding him tightly, Tim can't help but relax a little bit. He still has his moments of sadness but everything felt a little lighter with Jason here.
