Chapter Text
Coco never really understood what people meant when they said they were "too young" to date, yes they were young enough to still be considered children- but it wasn't like they were babies. For heaven's sake, she'd likely been through far worse things in the past couple months than any of the adults in their lives have experienced in all their years of life, who's to say they couldn't handle romance?
And on top of that madness, it was a complete switch from the way people had acted towards them before, when Coco would sit just as close to Tartah as she would anyone else and they'd hear giggling over their shoulders. When she'd visit the Starry Sword on her own every once in a blue moon and suddenly there'd be whispers of 'secret meetings'. When she'd hold Tartah's hand, and hug him and smile with him the same way she would with Tetia or Richeh and suddenly the two 'looked especially close'.
It was for those reasons that when Tartah had eventually confessed his feelings to her, how she'd been so important to who'd he'd become, how she'd been different, that she thought this is what everyone would have wanted. They were right all along about them, they truly were meant for one another, so tell her why- when she'd come rushing home with news of her brand new relationship, expecting big smiles and congratulations and 'I knew it'd happen's, she was instead met with hesitancy.
Qifrey had asked her if she had truly thought it through, if the either of them had. Told her she was too young to really know what a romantic relationship was like. Richeh and Tetia (her the most surprising of all) had these tight expressions on their faces, like they had something they really wanted to say but also really didn't want to cause problems. They'd asked her if she was sure, if she was really sure, asked her if she didn't wanna talk to Tartah about it first before simply telling her to 'do what makes her happy'.
And Agott...she said nothing at all, she'd asked her just once to confirm what she'd said was true, nodded in brief recognition at her words- before standing from where she had sat in the living room, announcing how'd she'd be turning in early for the night and immediately walking off to lock herself in her bedroom. Coco had found that odd, Agott was rarely one to even go to sleep on time let alone 'turn in early', and it wasn't even night- it had only just become evening. Coco had found all of them odd, they were usually so supportive and excited and accepting of everything she did, but even the most indifferent of their little atelier seemed to question her.
And what she thought most odd of all, she believed they were right to...
But time went on regardless, the first night after her news everything had seemed to go immediately back to normal. Qifrey and Olruggio still teased each other like an old married couple as they made that night's dinner, Tetia and Richeh still spoke and argued loudly and excitedly as they usually did sitting at the dining table. Everything was normal, except for Agott- who seemingly truly had turned in early as when Coco had gone to call her own of her room for dinner, she was only met with silence. She'd twiddled her thumbs and fidgeted in front of Agott's door for several minutes trying not to overthink, the other girl had always been indifferent to her- though she'd thought they had gotten closer as of recently.
But their closeness stemmed from magic! Not from silly relationships. Plus- every time Coco had tried to ask Agott about romance before, about what she did and didn't like, what she imagined in her future partner, if there was anyone who'd ever caught her eye- especially as of recent. The girl would simply look at her for a good long moment with this expression she could never decipher, before immediately changing the subject back to whatever it was they were currently working on. Coco had always taken that as Agott not particularly caring for romance, perhaps even having a little more than just a general disinterest in the topic.
Agott probably really was just tired, she's always working so hard, a little too hard in Coco's opinion-. Always pushing herself and trying to prove just how impressive and worthy she was of praise, of recognition, of the blood that would forever run through her veins. Too much effort for something Coco thought was so glaringly obvious, even she as a beyond beginner witch herself could tell, Agott was already a truly talented witch for their age- and she knew she'd only continue to grow and become even more amazing with each trial she naturally overcame. And Coco, almost more than anything -cus saving her mom still held first priority over everything else- wanted to be there to see Agott shine, and she hoped the girl would grant her the honour of being by her side when that day came...in a totally platonic way of course.
So yeah- Agott was probably just tired, no biggie, they could still talk again tomorrow like they usually do...
Except tomorrow Agott seemed almost as closed off as when Coco had first arrived in the Atelier, she wasn't being mean to her- of course not. Agott had promised to never treat Coco like that again and she knew that girl would never go back on that, she could see the honesty on the other girl's face so clearly even days later- it was an expression that haunted her sweetest dreams. Agott had simply just become- shorter with her- nothing more than simple greetings, nothing that wasn't out of obligation, a short good morning, a swift correction to a spell from across the room. It lacked so much of the warmth Coco had come to love and accustom herself to the past couple of days.
She figured Agott was probably just tired from having slept so much the evening prior, she of all people knew how much a thrown of sleep schedule could affect you.
But then Agott was the same way the day after that, short greetings, more space put between the two of them than she would've liked. It continued to the next day to, no more leaning over Coco at her desk in comfortable curiosity at her progress, sitting just a few inches further away from her at the dining table, subtly- yet enough for Coco to notice, cus Coco notices everything about Agott, flinching away from her whenever they accidentally brushed shoulders or knees or elbows.
That's what upset her the most, she'd taken so much pride in herself- was so truly ecstatic when she'd first felt Agott lean into her when she'd accidentally bump the girl's shoulder. Sometimes she would've managed to catch Agott's pinky in a gentle hold with her own, if she was lucky- the girl's entire hand hidden just out of sight, under the table at dinner, or hidden behind them when they sat together in the grass for practical lessons.
But now Agott was flinching away from her, she wasn't acting like a scared animal or like Coco disgusted her- but she was rejecting gentle touches from her, at that absolutely crushed Coco. It was that fact that'd finally gotten her to ask the others if she'd done anything to upset Agott, too scared to ask the girl herself directly out of fear of possibly upsetting her more. But no matter whoever she asked in the Atelier, they'd all respond the same way, they'd get this look on their face- some sort of mix between pity and knowing, like they all knew something she didn't- before telling her it was nothing. They'd tell her Agott was just tired, or stressed, or just being her usual self, they'd tell her not to worry about it.
But how on earth was she supposed to 'not worry about it'?! Agott was pulling away from her and she had no clue why!, and even worse- none of them were telling her what she did so that she could fix her mistake and fix her relationship with Agott before it got any worse.
She didn't know what she'd do if Agott ever decided she didn't want them to be friends anymore. She'd always imagined she'd be the one there cheering for Agott the loudest when she eventually proved to everyone just how amazing she is, she always thought that when(hopefully) she freed her mother from stone, Agott would be the first person she'd introduce to her. She wanted to show her mother the girl who'd helped her through her journey as a witch, lifting her up even when she was at her lowest, guiding her even when she knew nothing and was only holding everyone back. Every part of her future, ever since she truly got to know Agott, included her in it, and she didn't know if she could go back to imagining a future without the other girl there right by her- it just looked too dark.
On- a separate note, she had been going to the Starry Sword more than she typically would, she figured since her and Tartah were dating now they should be spending more time together..but-
It didn't exactly feel any different than when they were around each other before their relationship, in fact- whenever they tried to do anything romantic like cuddling or going on dates, god forbid kissing- they could never, it just felt wrong. It didn't feel like things the two of them should be doing, but they figured that was normal- that was just how new relationships felt, they were just getting into this so obviously getting used to the change would take time. But the both of them couldn't help but notice that when they were with each other, two very distinct names always seemed to come up.
Tartah would notice the way Coco's face softened whenever she talked about Agott, about her cute little tendencies she noticed that no one else seemed to. About they way she puffed up her cheeks like an owlcat when she was upset but not angry, how adorable it was that she could never seem to keep a tidy space, shoving bags of old paper and empty ink bottles under her desk that'd she'd 'get to later' even though later never came. He'd notice the way Coco's eyes would light up when she talked about Agott's magic, how it was truly the most amazing thing she'd ever seen, how even when she had moments of doubt in herself and magic as whole and began to give up, it was Agott's radiance that managed to pull her out of that darkness, she talked about Agott's abilities like if the girl was already a master and she was just waiting for everyone else to realize it
And in turn, Coco would notice the softness in Tartah's voice when he talked about Custas, about how he truly more than anything wanted to see him shine. How he was a hidden gem that only needed dusting and refining for everyone to see his true brilliance, how if Custas got a chance just as they did- as everyone else did- he'd prove to be one of the best of their generation, how he wanted to support Custas in all of his endeavours- wanted to forget the pact and help him become the amazing witch he was meant to be. She'd notice to fire in his eyes as he talked about how truly kinda Custas was, how unfair it was that Custas had to struggle just because he wasn't born a witch, that he was now considered a criminal and a danger just because he wanted to survive and help people, it wasn't fair that he had to lose so much and still be hunted because the wrong people "helped" him more than the "right" people ever allowed themselves to.
And it was from enough time noticing, over and over again that they had come to the same conclusion.
They chose wrong.
It was only a week after their relationship had even started that they'd come to their revelation, and only minutes after that they mutually decided that carrying on a relationship neither of them wanted was not something they were gonna do. Well mutual decision is a bit of a stretch-
It was more like them turning to each other on what was meant to be one of their "dates" in the Starry Sword and blurting out "I'm gay!" at the same time. Immediately followed by the two of them loudly groaning as they realized they'd wasted an entire week in a relationship and not with the person they'd been yearning for for days now.
But regardless, the relationship was over and Coco honestly didn't feel too bad about it. When she'd told the Atelier she could've sworn there was sort of collective relief that washed over everyone's faces, like they'd known from the very start that that was a dumb decision and was happy she came to that realization sooner rather than later which- they probably did. Of course they'd still offered her their condolences, despite her saying she didn't need them, they still cares about her regardless of her poor romantic choices.
The reaction that intrigued her the most though, was Agott's, who was standing at the top of the stairs, seemingly coming out of their shared workspace when she'd dropped the news. She'd frozen in her tracks, looked at Coco with these- almost hopeful eyes, and she could swear there was almost a sparkle in her eye when the two locked gazes. Though she couldn't be sure, as Agott had immediately turned on her heel and walked herself right back into their study. Again, Odd- but it was the first time in a whole week that Agott had looked at her with any kind of light in her eyes so she was nowhere near complaining.
When she'd made her way up to her study herself later on she hadn't seen Agott again, assuming she was likely locked up in her bedroom once more, but was far too tired after her mini emotional rollercoaster to think about it anymore than off the surface. So she turned to her own bedroom planning to pass out till the next morning, where she could forget about this whole ordeal and go back to studying and yearning in silence, but when she'd opened her door- something caught her eye. A small owlcat, one made of light like the magic Agott had showed her that night they'd truly become close, it was floating and bouncing over her bed circling a little piece of paper that had been carefully folded on her sheets.
When she'd opened it she immediately recognized the handwriting, though the adorable orb of light now circling her could've already tipped her off who put it here-, it was from Agott. A short note that simply read as: “sorry for your broken relationship, I'm not the strongest at romance or comfort but...if you should ever need a listening ear or shoulder to lean on, I'm always a door over"
Coco's smile grew painfully brighter with each word she read on that tiny piece of paper before she clutched it to her chest, rolling back onto her bed kicking and squealing like she'd just read the most romantic poem to ever be written by man. It was nothing really, not to anyone else at least, but to Coco it was a sign that they were still friends, that the two of them could still be close and that Agott still wanted to be in her life. She fallen asleep that night with that note clutched close to her heart like a love letter, watching that little owlcat spin in circles till the magic eventually ran out and she'd been lulled to sleep by its meaning.
Things after that had only gotten better in her humble opinion, Agott was closer to her than she'd ever been, she'd be the one to wake Coco up in the morning and lead her down to breakfast the next morning. Where as opposite to the week prior, she'd sit closer to the shorter girl than she ever had before, their shoulders almost brushing up against each other with each movement. Agott turned to talk to Coco at any moment she could, now not just leaning into their accidental touches again but being the one to initiate. In the days following Coco's break up Agott would only get closer to her, holding her hand more- this time without keeping their intertwined fingers hidden. Moving over to sit with Coco at her desk to better help her with spells and just to check her progress in general, she'd find Coco more and more to start conversations about the most menial things- nothing she'd ever thought before to be something Agott would ever care for.
Coco was happier than she'd thought she'd ever been, she'd worried so much before that Agott might never want to be her friend again for some reason still unknown to her, but now here the two were closer than ever before. Maybe Agott really was just in a mood, stressed, perhaps she had been working on a particularly difficult spell and its completion is what had Agott in such a stellar mood these past few days. Whatever it was she was glad it passed, she'd truly missed soaking up the warmth that came from being in the presence of Agott.
Then things started getting odd again, not a bad odd like that awful week in her relationship no- odd as in different.
Agott's touches started becoming bolder, moving from random handholds at the table during breakfast and in the grass during lessons to arms around her shoulder whenever they sat by each other on the couch. A thumb carefully rubbing across the back of her palm when they say at her desk in their study, hugs around her waist with Agott's chin resting on her shoulder as they talked about nothing in specific, that one shocked her the most- so much so she'd frozen up for so long that the other girl had almost apologized and pulled away. Coco was so glad when she convinced her not to though, and she'd hoped so much in her head that Agott would do it again.
Initially she'd thought the increased closeness between them was just a result of Agott's good mood from being freed of whatever rut she was in, but she'd only grown closer and closer to the girl in the days after. Coco had tried so hard to not let that make her delusional, told herself that it meant nothing- maybe whatever Agott was facing alone had broken down some sort of wall in her. It was just how Agott was now and she should be happy, because it meant she could be even closer to the girl she admired so much. Though- a small part of her nagged at the back of her head, guilt at the fact that she felt this way from the closeness to begin with, she felt like she was taking advantage of Agott's new found affection by not telling her about how she truly made her feel.
But she also knew someone as amazing as Agott could never reciprocate, Agott was an amazing witch- a prodigy- a future head librarian. And Coco was an outsider who managed to stumble her way into magic because of her own mistake, someone who brought trouble wherever she went because she was just that much of bad luck. Agott would never like her back no matter how close they were, not matter how much she wished and dreamed, so she'd just have to be happy with what she has now- just being by Agott's side is good enough for her.
Coco was trying to straighten out her bedsheets so that she could fully get ready to rest for the night. A certain brushbug who was now laying in the middle of her bed and making everything all the more impossible, had spilled ink on her white sheets, so she had to change out everything before they stained all the way through to the mattress. While trying to wrangle the surprisingly agile little rat off of her bed she heard a knock at her bedroom door, followed by a voice she knew all too well and was far too excited to hear.
"Coco?", Agott strangely sounded like Master Qifrey when she said that, guess that's what happens when you spend so much of your time with someone. Coco invited the other girl in as she sat at the edge of her bed, deciding to change her sheets after whatever it was that Agott needed to say, the girl in question entering the room with a surprisingly shy expression for her face. Coco hoped the way her face warmed at the cuteness of Agott's strange demeanor wasn't too obvious in the slight darkness of the room, she'd hate to embarrass the girl out of saying what she was clearly nervous to.
Agott closed the door behind her before swiftly shuffling her way over to Coco's bed, sitting down at the edge right next to Coco, not as close as she's been as of late, but not super far either. She played with the edge of her night dress, decidingly keeping her eyes pinned to her lap rather than looking at Coco in any way. Coco had no idea what Agott could possibly have to say to or ask her that could have her this nervous, but she was gonna be totally honest- seeing Agott- the usually so proud and stoic and reserved Agott- so bashful was the cutest thing she'd ever seen in her entire life.
"I-" Agott immediately stopped, scrunching up the fabric of her dress in frustration, Coco slowly put a gentle hand on Agott's shoulder, causing the girl to jolt slightly in surprise. She whipped her head up towards the other girl, her breath catching in her throat as she saw the gentle reassuring smile on Coco's face, "you don't have to force yourself if you don't want to but- you can tell me anything Agott, I promise I'll listen and I won't judge". Agott's face immediately softened at those words, her body losing just a bit of its nervous tension. She took a deep breath as she moved her gaze back down to her lap, resolving herself to do what she came in here for.
"Remember-.... Remember a couple months ago, when you'd returned from Kalhn, and fold everyone that you and Tartah had entered a relationship?", Coco flinched slightly at that memory. In all honesty she'd mostly forgotten about that whole situation, practically blocked it out of her memory like it was traumatic- "yeah- definitely one of my more embarrassing memories all things considered now.." she chuckled slight at the end of that statement though her smile remained ever so haunted as the memories came back.
Agott snicker just a little looking at Coco's expression out of the corner of her eye before looking back down at her lap, "well- I had been keeping you at arms length that week as I'm sure you'd noticed- quite unfairly to as it was nowhere near your fault that I had felt the way I did then". Coco's eyes widened slightly at hearing that immediately turning her gaze back onto Agott's nervous yet remorseful face. Even if she'd been telling herself that Agott's distance that week had nothing to do with her- she was happy nonetheless to know that it truly wasn't something she did to make the other girl upset with her.
But if Agott was bringing that up months later then- what on earth was the reason?
"I had been- upset- not with you of course! It was nothing you did" Agott rushed out briefly turning to Coco with reassurance. "I was upset with myself- you see I-", she took another deep breath as she closed her eyes, clearly steeling herself to say something very personal and very hard to say, Coco- after all this time of knowing Agott- was so glad she'd grown to trust her enough to- "I like you, no- I love you"...
.
..
What?
"I have for a long while- and it wasn't until that moment when I heard you say that you'd already found another- and realized how distraught that news made me feel...that I realized how much you meant to me", what does she mean she 'likes her'? what does she means she 'loves her'?? "And I was so upset with myself...so upset that it had taken me so long to realize- and that I had let so much time pass and missed my opportunity to even try, and then you were with him".
Agott said 'him' with enough venom on her tongue Tartah could probably feel it all the way in the Starry Sword, but Coco didn't care about that right now- she was still stuck on the fact that Agott- her Agott. The amazing, beautiful, talented, way too good for Agott, loved her. "And I hate to say it and sound as selfish as I really feel but- when I heard you two had broken up I'd gotten so excited, because it meant I had a chance, I had a chance to get closer to you and truly show you how I felt", Coco wasn't even paying attention anymore. She hadn't been for a while- she was too busy staring at Agott with these wide ecstatic smile and what was probably a disturbingly wide smile, she was already hearing wedding bells and imagining the colours they'd paint the walls of their future atelier of their own.
"And even with my forwardness these past couple of months I just- can't let this opportunity pass by me again, even if I risk losing this friendship...so" Agott took another steadying deep breath before turning to Coco. "Coco, will you-" before she can even think of finishing that sentence, she feels a warm body crash against hers, sending them both tumbling onto the bed- and subsequently disturbing the brushbug who'd managed to fall asleep during this whole moment-. Then more notably, she felt even warmer lips press against her own with clumsy excitement. Coco then propped herself up on both of her hands, grinning down at Agott with wild euphoria "yes! a hundred times yes!, whatever it is you were about to ask- absolutely!, I love you too!"
Agott stared up at Coco with the widest she'd ever had on her face to date, her face such a bright red could probably be used as a colour match for the capes of the Knights Moralis. Slowly her mouth morphed into a smile that matched Coco's before she launched her arms around the girl leaning over her, they both crashed back to the bed in giddy giggles- once again disturbing and nearly crushing brushbug, who huffed as he hopped off the bed before taking his leave.
The two girls remained wrapped in each other's arms for the rest of the night, Coco deciding to forget about properly fitting her sheets onto her bed in favour of talking to Agott abouy their newly realized feelings for each other. They talked about how they made each other felt, the dreadful week in which they had briefly drifted apart due to Coco's relationship, the months after that in which they were closer than ever yet not close enough to truly make the either of them happy, how Coco's realization of her feelings for Agott was partly why the relationship had ended. Agott even had to hold back a laugh when Coco told her about her and Tartah's mutual reaction of dismay when they realized they'd wasted so much time together, they'd talked well into the tender hours of the night both they both ended up falling asleep together tangled in each other's arms
And in the morning when they came down to breakfast together hand in hand with matching smiles, telling the rest of the Atelier about their newly found relationship, if there was far more excitement and congratulations and "I knew it"s than when Coco first shared this sort of news, then neither of them really cared, they were just happy to finally be together.