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April 29, Chuuya’s 18th birthday
Since Chuuya got a promotion, getting a day off has been easier. Of course, he’s had way more work to do since then as well, but thanks to his time organisation skills, he’s been able to plan the leave in advance. It’s not like Mori would let him work on his birthday either. Technically, he’s not sure if that day is his birthday (or if he even has one), but Kouyou convinced him that celebration doesn’t have to equal the literal day of being born. Knowing his complicated relationship with his biography, she also reminded him he doesn’t have to celebrate it per se, but it’s a good reason to spend time with those he values… and Mori would give him a day off.
He’s planning to go somewhere with Hirotsu and Tachihara. (When he thinks about it, they must look like a funny trio. Maybe people think he and Tachi are cousins, since they look similar, and Hirotsu is their elegant-yet-chill grandpa, who takes them to a bar?). The memories of those he wants to share his birthday with the most are a constant pain inside him. Thankfully, Kouyou is still by his side – he hopes they’ll drink one of his wines. If Verlaine leaves his cave and decides to join them, he might even taste a nice French wine. Mori will probably want to see him too.
The day is reserved for spending time with his closest friends and relaxing – and the most important requirement to feel relaxed is the absence of Dazai. That’s a rule that can’t be broken under no circumstances. His “partner” really has the talent to ruin any day, and especially an important one. Chuuya remembers well how Dazai decided to throw him a welcome party before he even officially joined the mafia.
Few hours and meetings later, Chuuya’s downing the first drink of the night, while actively focusing on watching his tongue in order not to say a word about Dazai. He knows tipsiness sometimes makes him talk about the other, or even worse – dial his number. The more alcohol he feels in his throat, the more he talks about Dazai. The sentences come out involuntarily and damage his pride. He’s had to be extremely careful ever since he realized something about his feeling towards the other boy he’d rather not share with anyone ever, thank you very much. Thankfully, one drink isn’t enough to fog his consciousness.
“And when Mori finally decided to leave, Elise had already hidden his book in her pocket,” when Hirotsu doesn’t have to be alert as much, he likes telling the younger mafiosi stories from his youth, especially those surrounding people they know – this time one about Mori’s incident involving Elise and a swordsman the boss used to be friends with. Chuuya laughs at the story as he adores the little girl and sometimes forgets she’s not a human.
Suddenly a techno tune that definitely doesn’t come from the bar starts playing. It’s a song Dazai made Chuuya put as his ringtone after a bet he lost. Chuuya picks up the phone and is surprised by who’s calling.
“Yes, boss?” he asks Mori. They talked earlier during the day because Mori wanted to personally wish him all the best. Chuuya informed him he was planning to go out tonight, so he didn’t expect any phone calls from his superior. This one shouldn’t be work related.
“Ahh…” Chuuya knew that sound very well. That’s how Mori asked for a favour – and because he was the head of the organization, most of them were actually orders. In some cases Mori showed real awkwardness, but even then his word was final. “Chuuya, I know you’re celebrating, but one of our troops has a serious problem. Normally, I would have made them resolve it on their own, but this one guards a special ability user I’ve been wanting to meet for a long time,” he told Chuuya the coordinates and advised him to hurry. “Ah, one more thing. It’s possible you will have to use Corruption. Anyways, you’ll decide yourself. Good luck.”
Judging by the faces of his colleagues, they either heard what Mori had just said or realised it on their own thanks to Chuuya’s irritated expression.
“Need a ride?” asked Tachihara.
“Nah, I got my own bike with me,” that, and Chuuya preferred not to bring his friends close to where he used Corruption. He knew it wasn’t exactly safe for them, even if they were skilled mafiosi whom he trusted could defend themselves. “Well, it was nice while it lasted. Thanks for drinking with me. Remember that we repeat it in three days on Higuchi’s birthday”.
“See ya,” said Tachihara as he raised one final glass at his friend.
Chuuya left the bar and put his helmet on. The thought of informing Dazai he might be needed didn’t even cross his head. The bandage lover somehow always knew when Chuuya was about to use Corruption, and the redhead suspected that sometimes Dazai knew that even before Mori had told him.
That night Dazai was finishing disguising dog food cans as a birthday cake for Chuuya. He was particularly proud of himself for that idea. Originally he was planning to hide a bomb in one of Chuuya’s more expensive cars but he decided to leave that for a better occasion. He found out where Chuuya’s birthday drinks were taking place and was about to drive there, but his phone started ringing.
“Uh, not him again…” the boy whined as he saw who was calling – it just had to be the worst possible option. Dazai waited about ten seconds to pick up the phone in order to annoy Mori. “Yes, boss?” he deliberately extended the last syllable. Mori might have not picked up on it, but it was his way of caricaturing Chuuya, who always answered him using those two words in the most polite tone ever.
“Don’t mimic Chuuya, Dazai. You could actually learn something from him. By the way, he’s about to use Corruption, so go to the location I just sent you. The car will be at your place in three minutes”.
Dazai was not exactly surprised by the news, but still irritated that his plan was ruined. The dog food “cake” wasn’t a stable construction and he knew better than anyone that every second counted when it came to Chuuya using his special ability. A full ten seconds of silence went by until Dazai broke it.
“Hwaaah. You picked the worst day for the mission.”
***
While carefully pulling off his gloves, Chuuya allows himself to just feel for a second. No matter how many times he does it or how good of a fighter he is, giving up his consciousness is simply a terrible feeling. Yet, it’s one he has to face again.
“O grantors of dark disgrace, do not wake me again…”
And like that, Chuuya drifts off into a state between a dream and wakefulness, between being his own person and having no control over his body. It’s like walking into a freezing ocean and being immediately submerged by its greatness – you don’t see anything and are impotent, yet every millimetre of your body can feel the powerful water. The water, which in this case, Chuuya is both the ruler and the subject of.
He is still able to feel his skin starting to burn from the red runes appearing on his body. They crawl all over him and are sure to leave faint marks, like each time after using Corruption. By the corner of his eye he can see a tall silhouette, which he is sure belongs to his partner. Whilst he can, Chuuya wonders if also this time Dazai’s name will be the only coherent word that leaves his mouth. He fights till the last second to uphold his dominance inside his own mind, but it’s a lost battle from the start. Soon, he doesn’t hear any sounds, even though he is the main maker of the noise.
Dazai is observing it all from a distance many wouldn’t call safe. He doesn’t stand there due to his suicidal tendencies – he simply really wants to see Chuuya in that state. A furious force brutalizing everything on its way. The best part is, Chuuya will never find out Dazai does that every time. The more Chuuya gets closer to Dazai, the more the latter becomes breathless. Watching him throw literal black holes in unforeseeable directions, all while Chuuya himself looks so alive and glowing, is fascinating.
The remaining enemies, who still haven’t flooded the battlefield, are inclosed by the damage caused by Chuuya. Some parts of the ground are burning, while others are turned into deep holes with no way up. Dazai does not care for them at all. Another mafia member takes care of intercepting the ability user Mori wants, so his only job is to nullify Corruption – and until then he can do whatever he wants.
Even from his distance he can see Chuuya’s body can’t take much more. The reminder that, after all, Chuuya is human, no matter what he believes. The marks are much darker than at the beginning and the blood is mixing with his ginger hair. Dazai steps up closer to be ready to touch Chuuya as soon as possible when he’s done with the enemies.
Chuuya isn’t sure what he sees is real and what is distorted by Arahabaki. He feels locked in darkness and total silence, despite that not being the reality. He’s slowly fading away and burning out. Literally – the marks are getting hotter with each passing second, and each second either feels like an hour or doesn’t even get noticed by him.
He finds Dazai again. One side of him just wants to attack him, like everything else on his way. He probably tries to, because Chuuya’s buried consciousness thinks he’s now circling around his partner. The other side must be responsible for calling out Dazai’s name. Suddenly, something so unbelievably cold touches his scorching hot cheek that Chuuya regains his consciousness – and with it, the sensation in his body. The bruises attack him all at once and he passes out.
***
When Chuuya wakes up, he’s half-sitting with his head on Dazai’s chest. They’re sitting by one of the few trees that haven’t been affected by the destruction. The only source of light is the last street light standing, although even that one is a bit crooked. Chuuya groans loudly, feeling how sore his body is.
“Happy birthday, Chuuya,” Dazai looks down at him and gives him a rare soft smile. Oh, no. Chuuya can’t be dealing with the way Dazai’s looking at him while he’s in the post-corruption state. And practically lying on him. So he goes for the usual.
“I hoped I wouldn’t have to look at your stupid face today.”
“And yet your stupid face is lying on my chest,” Dazai lightly touches Chuuya’s forehead. His words make him move his body up a bit, but his position almost doesn’t change anyways. They stay quiet for some time and Chuuya tries to sooth himself with the sound of Dazai’s heartbeat. Not long ago he used to dislike the sound of a beating heart – it made him think too much about his own humanity, but so many nights spent together after using Corruption have changed that.
“Y’know, I don’t think I can ever grow accustomed to using this ability. It feels like I’m in an abyss”.
“You shouldn’t have to. Mori is making you use it too often. Some of the markings have already become permanent,” he adds and takes one of Chuuya’s forearms into his hands to look at the runes.
“He’ll be doing so as long as we’re partners. We’re his best asset, after all. So I can imagine I’ll have to get used to it.”
“Yeah, I guess you’ll have to,” he answers after some time. His fingers are now moving up and down Chuuya’s inner forearm.
Chuuya understands his body well. He knows when he should finish a training session or focus on a certain body part, knows how to treat it after using Corruption, what tea helps him with a migraine and when he’s going to fall sick. So he has known for a few months now that the way he feels with Dazai isn’t how partners in crime should feel. It can’t be explained with post-battle adrenaline or tiredness. Can’t be, because it’s happening more and more – when they’re at an arcade, the Port Mafia headquarters, even in Dazai’s ugly container. It’s bloody annoying – because it’s Dazai – but also oh-so exciting, for the same very reason.
So Chuuya takes advantage of the state that he’s in (he deserves at least one advantage of using Corruption) and acts like Dazai stroking his hand is completely neutral to his run-down self, so he doesn’t stop doing it. Why is Dazai doing that in the first place really is a question for a more sober Chuuya.
“You called my name, you know?”
“I wasn’t sure. I don’t really know what’s true and what’s a hallucination. But I saw you there.”
“Ah-ah, so you’re trying to kill me and put the blame on Arahabaki? Chuuya, that would be a double suicide!” he jokes, but when he opens his mouth again, his tone is back to normal. “I never heard you say anything different than my name,” and there go Chuuya’s attempts at acting nonchalant.
The faint blush has just emerged on Chuuya’s nose, so Dazai once again indulges himself in his favourite activity: observing Chuuya. His freckles, his hair, his cheekbones, his lips, his eyes, his eyelashes, the small scar on the base of his wrist, the way his hand slightly shivers in between the strokes, the face he makes when he’s trying not to fall asleep. One of the reasons why he prefers nighttime over daylight is the advantage it gives him in looking at Chuuya. He may see less details, but the act itself is more safe. The night acts like a veil between him and admitting his feelings.
They almost kissed once during the night. Or at least Dazai thinks so. It was during a week-long mission. The particular day wasn’t even draining physically that much but tiring mentally, so they drank one too many beers. Chuuya is a real lightweight and Dazai is a real loser for him, so when the redhead made a suggestive move towards him, he was ready to do anything and everything Chuuya wanted. Turned out, he just wanted to give him a peck, which was nice too, but Dazai was sure there was something more to the way he looked at him. Later, when they shared the only bed there was, he was constantly looking at the boy lying next to him instead of trying to fall asleep. He thought his action was covered by the dark, until Chuuya turned his head and asked why he was staring at him.
But this Chuuya was too tired to catch Dazai at this act, so he continued.
“There’s no way I’m using Corruption on my birthday next year,” Chuuya finally gave in and nuzzled his head in the crook of Dazai’s neck. He immediately felt his eyelids getting heavier.
“I’ll make sure it’ll be better. I don’t know if I can top this year’s present I have for you, though. I’ll show you it tomorrow.”
Once again, Chuuya’s subconsciousness drifted away. This time, however, it was by Dazai’s side. Chuuya wouldn’t admit it out loud but he’s glad Dazai is there with him – both on the battlefield, and on his birthday.